I shall keep my promise
by Riryuuen27
Summary: New moon,lets say the phone call came late?What if Bella chose Jake?Bella is pregnant with Jake's child which creates problems.During that time,her feeling towards Jake has grown.Will she admit it?Will Jake keep his promise or will Edward destroy it? chapter 1 re-edited on 6.6.2012
1. Chapter 1 entrance to my heart

**Disclaimer: I don't own twilight or its characters which you already know..**

**This is my first fanfiction ever so please no lude comments. Constructive criticism is accepted. This story picks up from the moment in New Moon when Jacob was with Bella in the kitchen and everything goes accordingly to New Moon except that the phone call from Edward and when Alice comes to tell Bella about Edwards intention on suicide thing was a bit late (Pg 410 411 from New Moon). The words bolded are from the book "new moon"**

**Bella's Pov**

**Chapter 1 Entrance To My Heart**

"I don't like the way things are."Jacob freed one arm so he could cup his big russet hand under my chin and make me look at him.

"Yeah. It was easier when we were both human, wasn't it? " Jacob said quietly.I sighed.

We stared at each other for a long moment. His hand smoldered against my skin. I knew that my face showed my wistful sadness. I didn't want to have to say good bye now, no matter for how short of a time. At first his face reflected mine, but then his expression changed.

He released me, lifting his other hand to brush his fingertips along my cheek, trailing them down to my jaw. I could feel his fingers tremble not with anger this time. He pressed his palm against my cheek, so that my face was trapped between his burning hands.

"Bella," he whispered.

I was frozen. No! I had not made this decision yet. I 'm running out of time to think. I would have been a fool, if I thought rejecting him now wouldn't have consequences. I stared back at him. His face was familiar. He was not my Jacob, but he could be. In so many ways, I did love him. He was my comfort, my safe harbor. Right now, I could choose to keep him mine.

Alice was back for the moment but that changed nothing. True love was forever lost. The prince was never coming back to kiss me awake from my enchanted sleep. I was not a princess after all. Maybe it would be easy ... like holding his hand or have his arms around me. Maybe it would feel nice. Maybe it wouldn't feel like a betrayal.

Besides, who was I betraying anyway? Just myself. Yes...I couldn't love him back, like I used to love Edward. No one can take the place Edward held in my heart; he was my everything, my significant other but... He wasn't coming back. Was I prepared to sacrifice my life for the one who left me, or should I move on with the one that brought me back to life? Was I ready to face any of these?

Keeping his eyes on mine, Jacob began to bend his face towards me, and I was still undecided but the hourglass has a mind of it's own. My thoughts started to drift away as I tried to decide what's best for me.. for now atleast. I still had so many more things to figure out.

The more I try to figure out, the more my memories of the day he left came to the forefront of my brain. Even though it was just a memory, a past, it felt so real. The pain was just too much to bear, it was suffocating. It's as if the air around vanished but then suddenly everything stopped. As if time itself stopped.

You know how people talk about their worlds?

Like: "The moment i laid my eyes on her, i knew she was the one for me" Or "My life was never the same, after I heard the news." If i would i have to pint point the moment my world tilted, i would definately say that it stopped turning for a second when I got to know that both of most important men in my life are enemies for life. And then it stalled out when Edward left me in the woods. But now, right this instant, time actually did stop.

I swear i couldn't feel my heart beating all of sudden, there was a rush of electricity in my body and it was pulling me closer to something by the minute.

I was determined to find out what was going on and so I opened my eyes. And I saw Jacob's warm lips pressed firmly against mine. His arms snaked down around my waist, pulling me ever so tightly against his warm body.

I began to feel dizzy with the heat against me. It didn't help that my thoughts were being smashed together. I couldn't think straight while he was kissing me.

His tongue was asking permission to enter my mouth. I tried my very best to resist all that was happening. I know very well where this was going to lead to in the end. But, was I ready to face the consequences? What if he comes back for me?

His words continues to echoe in my mind

**"I promise that this will be the last time you'll see me. I won't come back. I won't put you through anything like this again. You can go on with your life without any more interference from me. It will be as if I'd never existed."**  
He wants me to go on with my life without him, after all that happened between us. I was so willing to become one of them. I begged him to change me.

**"Don't worry. You're human—your memory is no more than a sieve. Time heals all wounds for your kind."**  
What was that supposed to mean? Time heals all wounds? For the last 4 months I was a zombie. This was most certainly not healing, not until I got involved with Jake. He changed me bit by bit, when I was around him thoughts of Edward never passed through my mind. Charlie was right when he said, ever since I started hanging around Jacob I improved but...

**"He's a year younger than her, and I know she used to think him as a friend, but I think maybe it's something more now, or headed in that direction "**  
That part I couldn't quite agree with Charlie but what if maybe if it is for the best after all.

His touch sent shivers down my spine. He made me so weak when he started kissing my collarbone. I never imagined sharing this experience with anyone except Edward but back when we were still together we couldn't do much rather just a simple chaste kiss.

Now, I kissed Jacob Black with all the passion I could muster within me_. Maybe Juliet should have chosen Paris. Maybe he could have given her a better life._

**"Be happy"**Those words sank deep in my chest.

How could he do this to me? What did I do to deserve what he did to me? A lot of these questions have gone through my thoughts for the better part of the last few months but until now I couldn't seem to find the answer. Maybe these were questions that didn't have any answers but right now I needed to make a decision.

As hard as it is for me to even try to imagine Jacob in every scene that i have stored for Edward. Maybe it's time now. Just like how Renee did with Charlie. Maybe just maybe .. It's time for me to choose too.

And I chose him, the one that brought me back to life, my personal sun. In that very moment, I gave him entrance to my mouth and also and entrance to my heart as well. And from that very moment I knew Jacob Black was going to be more than just my best friend. A few moments after his tongue evaded mine, we fought for dominance. I was leading him to my room.

Just after we entered my room he pinned me against the wall and he started to trail kisses down my neck where he started nibbling slightly. I closed my eyes and tried to feel him. As soon as I opened my eyes, I realized Jacob was on top of me on my bed. He pressed our bodies closer, and I released a moan. His kisses grew hot.

I was starting to pant as he got to my collarbone. I felt him licked it and it sent shivers to my body. He started undressing me as his hands ran gently over my sides, and as his legs tangled back into mine. His lips ran down my neck as his hands lifted my shirt and inched towards me.

I looked in his eyes and I no longer saw my Jacob that was my comforting friend. I saw lust in his eyes. My chest pushed my breath heavily through my lips and I couldn't take it anymore.

I tried to think straight but I couldn't so I decided to stop before this carried on too far.

"Jake...i think we should…." I stopped midsentence when it happened. I felt pain as well pleasure, but soon it was all over. I lost my virginity to Jacob. I saw Jacob staring at me.

His lips were moving "Bells, I love you. I know you don't see me the same way as you see him but please give me a chance. I showed you how much I want you. How I much I love you. how much I need you. I want to spend rest of my life with you and only you. Please understand that you're my life. There's nobody else for me other than you. I hope things change after this." Jacob sighed.

I know he's sad and he has the right to be so. I felt bad for making him feel that way, it was unfair of me. Maybe it's about time, I gave jacob his happiness and just see what's instore for me as well in this newly formed relationship.

I gave him a chance, I gave him something that i held on so precious, that even now when I think about what i had just done, i'm suprised. I can't believe that it actually happen, i always thought it would have been awkward since even kissing was a problem at times with Edward.

I'm suprised that it went smoothly,it was as if it was meant to be. It felt beautiful giving him my virtue. _Eventhough i didn't plan on doing so, i didnt regret abit._

I gave him, something I held and kept for Edward. I felt like I betrayed Edward but when I think again but no. He is not, he left and he isn't coming back.I wanted this as much as jacob did, eventhough i tried to deny myself of that fact,as well as instigated a bit of it. His face changed when he saw me smile.

"Jake, I wanted you just as much as you wanted me. Can't you see I gave myself to you. I have finally opened my heart for you!" I explained right before he pulled me to into a bear hug.

"Bells, there's something I want to say to you"Jacob said suddenly.

I replied "go on". He took a deep breath and said, "Bells when we were ...erm..." Was Jacob Black blushing? "well I kind of im..."

( Ring. Ring..)  
Who could be calling now? Jacob reached over me to get the receiver.


	2. Chapter 2 i shall keep this promise

Disclaimer: No I don't own twilight. If I did Jacob would be the leading role

This chapter is for you WritingWriter315 and connect2tjb btw again thanks for your review.

(pg 412 new moon)

"Swan residence," Jacob said, his husky voice low and intense. Someone answered, and Jacob altered in an instant. He straightened up and his eyes went flat, his face blank, and I would have bet the measly remainder of my college fund that it was Alice. I started dressing back, and then I held out my hand for the phone. Jake ignored me.

"He's not here," Jacob said, and the words were menacing. There was some very short reply, a request for more information it seemed, because he added unwillingly, "He's at the funeral." Then Jacob hung up the phone. "Filthy bloodsucker," he muttered under his breath. His face change bitter. "Who did you just hang up on?" I gasped, infuriated. "In my house and on my phone?"

"Easy! He hung up on me!"

" He? Who was it?" I thought it was Alice. " Dr. Carlisle Cullen." He sneered the title. I was furious "why didn't you let me talk to him?" "He didn't ask for you," Jacob said coldly as his face was expressionless. "He asked where Charlie was and I told him. I don't think I broke any rules of etiquette." Now he has made me upset, after our intimate moment, after I gave myself to him. Now he starts to act like jerk. "You listen to me, Jacob Black..." obviously he wasn't listening. He looked over to the window as if someone called him from there. His eyes went wide and his body stiffed. He started heading towards the window but was stopped before he reached there with Alice coming through the window.

Oh so this is the cause for Jacob's change for awhile ago, I was brought back to reality from my thoughts when I heard Jacob's growl. In front of me stood a motionless Alice, her skin was paler than usual, her slim body trembled to an inner turmoil… this couldn't be good. "What do you want bloodsucker" "none of your concern mutt" Alice replied Jacob. "Bella" she chocked. "Alice whats wrong?" I cried. I put my hands on her, trying to calm her.

Her eyes were focused on mine abruptly, wide with pain. "Edward," was all she whispered. My body reacted faster than my mind was able to catch up with the implications of her reply. I didn't at first understand why the room was spinning or where the hollow roar in my ears was coming from. My mind labored, unable to make sense of Alice's bleak face and how it could possibly relate to Edward, _**you can go on with your life without any more interference from me. It will be as if**_ _**I'd never existed**_.

Yeah this is really helping Edward, as if you never existed. He left me after all we been and what can he say _**be happy**_? Even though it's impossible to forget him, I tried moving on with, w Jacob and I did. He actually accepted me, even though I was broken, he loved me for who I was not regret because I was human. He accepted me with open heart even though he knows my heart still belongs to him. With what Jacob and I shared a few moments ago, was priceless I could have never had done that with you unless I was changed as a vampire. I thought things will go back to normal. And now he just has to ruin it, Now he calls! For what?! To know whether I'm still alive?! My body was already swaying, seeking the relief of unconsciousness before the reality could hit me.

Jacob's furious voice was suddenly in my ear, hissing out a stream of profanities. I felt a vague disapproval. His new friends were clearly a bad influence. "What did you do to her?" he demanded. Alice ignored him. "Bella? Bella, snap out of it. We have to hurry." Hurry ? Where? "Stay back," Jacob warned. "Calm down Jacob black," Alice ordered. "You don't wanna do that so close to her." "I don't think I'll have any problem keeping my focus," he retorted.

"Alice?" My voice was weak. "What happened?" I asked, even though I didn't want to hear.

"I don't know," she suddenly wailed "what was he thinking?!" I labored to pull myself up despite the dizziness. I realized, I was wrapped with Jacobs arms. He pulled me, as now my back was against his chest, it was comforting. My eyes relocated her when I saw Alice was pulling a small silver phone from her bag. Her fingers dialed the numbers so fast they were a blur. "Rose, I need to talk to Carlisle now." Her voiced whipped. From then I listened carefully to the conversation between Alice and Rosalie, a heated exchange between the sisters as I try to follow their conversation.

It's getting no where. I'm confused now. We were getting broken information that was leading no where. Alice ended the call and we begin to sort through the fragmented pieces of information that we received from Rosalie to reveal what had actually happened. "Rosalie called Edward to tell him that you were dead, based on the vision that I had of you before" Alice said with stressing every word. She is feeling that its all that is happening now is her fault." And the "Dr. Carlisle Cullen" who called was in fact..." Alice said as I interrupted her mid way "Edward." Was all I could say to continue her. So it was Edward who called.

"The response from Jacob on the other end of the phone when he said "He's at the funeral" only served to confirm your death Bella" Alice said in horror. Alice continued "I tried calling his phone just now but a stranger answered the phone" Wait he dumped his phone?! "Where could have he gone?" I asked. "Bella... he's gone to meet The Volturi in Italy" Alice replied. Why would he wanna go and meet them? Unless … I stopped right... I stopped all my thoughts right there. No... No... He couldn't possibly want himself death. This is ridiculous. He left me. He didn't want me anymore. So why should he care? But none of that mattered now. I have to save him. I have to save Edward before it's too late.

"Alice we have to safe him. I have to save him" that was all that Alice need to hear. She instructs me to write a letter to Charlie and get my I.D and passport as well while she arranges the flight. We were going to Italy. Without hesitation I got up from Jacob, Alice already explained the dangers but I am willing to risk it all just to save him. He is my life, my significant other, I could not let him die. As I was just about to go to my closet, but was stopped when a strong warm hand grabbed me. I turned back and I saw Jacob grabbing my hand, his face had the confused look. I didn't have the time to argue with him.

"Bella what are doing" he asked what? Was he a fool ?! Wasn't he there when Alice and I were talking about the situation. As I thought I have no time to argue with him "Jacob let me go! I'm going to Italy to save Edward" I said forcefully without looking in his eyes. "What?! Bella you couldn't be serious..." he said in disbelief "I thought you love me, I thought you said that you accepted me. You still want him after what he did to you" "Jake..." I started " I do love you but you do know I still love him, Jake his my life, he's my everything I can't let him die" "Then, what happened between us all these while and just now was all lie? He asked, while trying to control his temper.

"Jake what happened before was all just friendship... I never put you in my heart in a romantic way" I lied, I just couldn't tell him the truth not now, he doesn't deserve it "what happened just now between us was a mistake nothing more" a mistake that I will never regret. At that instant he let go of my arm, I guess it brought more effect on him than I thought. He was shocked by what I said. I saw his eyes went blank and his face was motionless. I feel bad for hurting him. But I had to choose Edward over him.

I rushed to my closet as I know there wasn't much time left, I got all the stuff that Alice told me to get. My heart panged in regret as I remembered the last time I ran out of the house like this. Last time it was running from danger. This time I am running towards it. I was just about to leave, to join Alice in the Mercedes. But was stopped when a pair of arms hugged me from behind. "Don't leave... please" Jake whispered to my ear "Please Bella, I beg you... I can't live without you...please don't go...I love you" he was pleading with teary eyes. this was just too much for me to handle. "Jake ... I'm sorry but I can't accept your love. No body can replace him in my heart and you know that...please don't make this hard, you should understand"

"Jacob please do me a favor" I asked, I know I have done and left too much bad affects on him and I still expect t him to help me but I really need this. He looked in my eyes waiting for me say something "could you please take care of Charlie while I'm gone? Please" I pleaded him. "Treaty or no treaty I promise you I will protect Charlie with all my life" "is this what you really want bells" he asked I nodded and said "yes, this is ... I need him...i need Edward like I need you, he meants a lot to me and if I can't save him... it will hurt me a lot me" " bells I promise you that I won't hurt … but if this is what you then I can't do anything" with that said Jacob stepped aside while I locked the door. In desperation, worried this would be the last time that I will ever see Jacob again I threw my arms around him and then kissed the palm of his hand.

I couldn't bear to look him in the eye before, but as Alice spun the car around in a squeal of shrieking tires I just had to do it. I called out to him once more. "Take care of Charlie!", but Jacob wasn't there. Only a shred of white tennis shoe remained on the edge of the forest. I'm sorry Jacob. Was all that I could say to him after everything he has done to me.


	3. Chapter 3 welcome back romeo part 1

**Disclaimer: no, I don't own twilight and yes I don't like Edward…**

**A special thanks to jacobfan216 my close friend, and everyone who reviewed. I hope you like this chapter, i'm sorry for my tenses and grammatical errors in my previous chapters. I'm not very good in writing and it's my first time as well so...im sorry I will try my best to improve it. And for whoever wants to know what's coming up ahead in this story, you can go to my profile and read the long version of my summary of this story.**

**ATTENTION! If YOU HAVE READ NEW MOON OR WATCH THE MOVIE, YOU CAN SKIP THIS CHAPTER. THIS CHAPTER RETELLS THE EVENTS THAT HAPPENED WHEN BELLA WENT TO ITALY. **

**Bella's Pov**

I couldn't bear to look him in the eye before, but as Alice spun the car around in a squeal of shrieking tires I just had to do it. I called out to him once more. "Take care of Charlie!", but Jacob wasn't there. Only a shred of white tennis shoe remained on the edge of the forest. I'm sorry Jacob. Was all that I could say to him after everything he has done to me. I feel so bad, how could I do this to my personal sun? I know I'm being selfish but I just can't let Edward go. I can't... he's my everything. I need him like I need air to breathe.

While on the flight to Italy, Alice calls Jasper to tell him our plan and explains that the visions in her mind keep changing. I felt Alice's gaze on me, I turned to look upon her. "Bella, you need to go and show yourself to Edward in order for him to believe that you are still alive.

Just hearing the thoughts from my mind won't be enough for him... you know how stubborn he could be sometime" Alice said with a pleading look on her face. Then she explains to me who the Volturi are and how serious the situation with Edward is. I was terrified, I can't believe Edward could be so dumb enough to even think about doing this.

I was about to ask Alice how long was this flight gona take but I changed my mind as soon as I saw the look on Alice's face. She's having vision. Alice came back to normal a few moments later. "What was it about" I asked with the hope that it's a good news "Bella, I had a vision of the Volturi asking Edward to join them."

"What?" I asked, is that a good thing or a bad thing. "Wait there's more" she continued "The conversation then turns to the many visions that I had of you being a vampire" she said with a guilt. I am going to be a vampire? That was all that mattered, I am going to be a vampire… my heart was filled with joy, at last I can be one of them. I can be in their family without being awkward… and at last I and Edward will forever be together. I did the next thing that I thought was right

"Alice. Please change me into a vampire right now... so that I could be able to help Edward, please" I begged her. " Bella it's not that easy like it seems" she then points out that it takes days for the venom to do its work and that she may not be strong enough to resist killing me to taste my blood. No why does this have to be this way... Alice tried to distract me from thinking about it a lot. Alice explains to me that Edward plans to walk out into the sunlight where everyone can see him. That would get the Volturi's attention enough to sentence him to death. "We have to reach the center of town before Edward steps out into the sunlight" Alice said while glancing at me to make sure I get it.

Showing off one of her many illegal skills, Alice steals a Porsche and drives to the center of the city. The place is crowded with people for the St. Marcus Day celebrations. Alice tells me that she will get us as close as possible, but I will have to make some of the distance on my own. Since the whole town will be crowed. We rush to save Edward, driving through the winding, crowded streets of Volterra.

Alice tells me that we must reach Palazzo dei Priori, the clock tower, where Edward will be waiting in an alleyway, getting ready to step into the sunlight. On our way, Alice bribes a guard with a thousand dollars to let us pass. We made our way through the narrow roads until we reached the point where the only way to continue the journey was by foot. Well I didn't think twice, I know this is dangerous but this is what I want. I want Edward...please I hope I'm not too that I said " Alice, I'm going" I didn't even wait for her response I darted out from the car, pushing my way past the crowd. I heard Alice said "be careful Bella".

I heard clock tower starts to chime, I'm running out time so I did what thought might help " Edward" I stared shouting without caring if people thought I might be crazy. I just hope that he will hear me and see that I'm still alive. I keep pushing myself through more people, and there I saw him, his pale skin, and his golden eyes. The one I longed to be with forever. I started yelling for him to look at me. He didn't hear me, so I charged at him, flinging myself against his body. I saw the look is his eyes, I think he is having difficultly believing that I'm alive as keeps speaking as if we were both now dead.

Once I have successfully convinced Edward that we were both still alive, I told him that we have to run before the Volturi arrives. Luck seems not be in my side, I saw two dark shapes heading towards us. Edward helds me close, he tries to tell them that their services aren't needed any longer, but they insist that both of us follow them.

They want me to come with them? This is strange... i heard Edward telling them to let me go, but again, the guy; Felix says that Aro has requested both of us to come along. Edward was stubborn, he tried to fight for my freedom, I was about tell Edward that its ok I'm willing to go with him but a girl came towards us. It seems her name is Jane; she was about 5ft, blonde and has a child like beauty. I don't know why but I feel she's dangerous. As soon as she arrives, Edward agrees.

Edward and I follow the Volturi, Alice joins us, on our way Alice explains to Edward that she had made a mistake with how she interpreted the vision of me cliff diving. All the time, Edward kept his arm around me, it was comforting. When we arrive at a small drain in the street, Alice slides down first to wait for me. Edward helps me down as Alice catches me. Edward joins us and again wraps his arms around me. He strokes my face and holds me tight against him.

The dark tunnel slants downward. They are led deeper and deeper into a cold, damp area. I didn't like this place at all. There is a grate at the end made of thick iron bars. On the other side is a room with a low, heavy door. As we entered, I felt Edward tenses up while still holding on to me. There we were in the Volturi castle.

While I was relieved to be out of the underground tunnel, Edward's tension increases. I notice that the vampires of Volterra have red eyes. I also notice a striking human, in the employ of the Volturi. I thought humans are forbidden to know their existence. Why was she here? Then a guy came to greet us. I learn through Edward the guy whom greeted us was Alec but Edward remains tense. I wish I know why he was still tense; Edward wants to confront Felix, but Alice stops him from doing so.

Jane and Alec lead us into a large room where Aro, who is one of the Volturi, and other vampires mingle. Aro greeted me and Alice as if he knows us, this totally surprised me, He seems quite excitable. Way different from what I imagine him, I thought he would be quiet and scary but he was the exact opposite but I wouldn't say he's a chatter box.

Aro then expresses envy for Edward's ability, and Edward explains the similarities and differences between his and Aro's abilities. Caius and Marcus arrive another two vampires. Although Marcus does not speak... which I don't know why but im curious to know. He allows Aro to touch him in order to communicate which Alice told. Aro shows surprise at Edward's ability to refrain from drinking the blood of his "la tua cantante" and refers to it as a waste. What's "la tua cantante"? Now he left me confused. Now the creepy part.. Aro marvels at how strongly my blood calls to Edward and says that Edward has surpassed Carlisle's self-control, which Edward denies. Well,.. this is getting awkward.

Ever so curious as I was to him, Aro wants to test his gift on me, he asked me to held out my hand so that he could read my thoughts. Well, he was surprised to see he didn't get see what he wants. I guess since he and Edward share a similar gift, that's why it didn't work on me. Next, he wanted Jane to test her ability on me. What did he think I was? A lab rat? To my surprise Edward steps between Jane and me to protect me, I didn't see that coming.

I tried to move to save Edward but my body ignored my command as if something was holding me back. I turned back to see Alice holding me back as I fought to get out of her grip.. I saw my love, Edward writhes on the floor in silent agony. Then Jane gaze was on me, I closed my eyes, I don't want see anything. But nothing happened, I didn't feel anything. As I opened my eyes I saw a very angry Jane...

Aro asks us, if we would like to join the Volturi. We all refuse. Then I heard, Caius insists that the law claims us, since I am human and I already know their secret. Edward argues, pointing out the humans involved in the Volturi operations. He tries to defend me but Caius explains that the difference is that the humans that get involved either will be changed or killed. Caius left Edward two options either change me or kill me. I hope he picks the first option.

Then Aro asks Edward if he intends to change me. I prayed he will say yes... Edward please yes...please...please. say yes... I can't live without you again. I can't go through it again. It hurts too much. But Edward remained quiet and he refuses to allow Aro to touch him in order to read his mind. What? Edward...i thought we were soulmates. He doesn't want me. I couldn't believe that he wants me dead. Well he didn't say it out loud but if he doesn't want to change me then he wants me…..

He wants me dead rather than I become a vampire. How selfish could he be? I came back to reality when I heard, Alice said out loud that I will become a vampire; she then let Aro read a future which she saw me as a vampire. I saw the look in Aro's face, he looked satisfied. Then I heard him say that we were allowed to leave. I was relief but before we left, I saw a beautiful lady with mahogany hair and crimson eyes, Heidi was her name. She arrives with a group of tourists; it looks likes they are here for sight seeing but why here? I thought…. I snapped out of my thoughts my heard loud painful screams. I was speechless, this horrified me. Then I felt pair cold icy arms around me, I turned to look, and it was Edward. In response I snuggled closer to him.


	4. Chapter 4 a broken heart

**Disclaimer: no, I don't own twilight and yes I don't like Edward…**

**A special thanks to jacobfan216 my close friend, and everyone who reviewed. I hope you like this chapter, i'm sorry for my tenses and grammatical errors in my previous chapters.**

**ATTENTION! THIS CHAPTER IS JACOB'S POV ON CHAPTER 2, THIS CONTAINS JACOB'S FEELINGS ON THE WHOLE IMRPINT AND ON BELLA'S ACTONS ON CHAPTER 2. SO YOU CAN SKIP THIS IF YOU DON'T WANT TO READ CHAPTER 2 IN JACOB'S POINT OF VIEW.**

"Swan residence," I said coldly, who could be calling now.

Whoever it is, it better be good reason for the call cause I was about to tell Bella that I just imprinted her. I heard a familiar voice asking,

"Can, I speak to Charlie Swan?" Wait I know him, I altered in an instant. I began straightened up from bed and why would he want to call now? After what he did to bells, anger was rising within me; I got distracted when I saw bells getting dressed.

Wow she's pretty; I guess I just got lucky this time... this time she accepted my love for her... I saw bells held out her hand for the phone. Wait... no...No... She shouldn't know who call.

Bells was just getting back to normal. I could still remember the first time after a long, I saw her smile back, it was when she was hanging with in my garage. I was happy that it was me that made her smile back.

Then images of bells being in the woods when Sam found her came through my thoughts. I saw these images when I was on patrol with Sam. He showed me, how miserable bells was when he left her. No... Bells must not know he called. I ignored her attempts on getting the phone.

"He's not here," I said, and my words were menacing.

Charlie? Why would he want to talk to Charlie? Wait... is he planning to ask forgiveness from Charlie? Does he want to comeback? Oh I am not gona give him any space for him to comeback. Bells mine...she's my imprint... he left her and he aint getting her back while I'm still alive.

"Where is he?" he asked.

He's in La push and you're going to hell. And guess who's gona send you there? Me! I didn't want to reply but since bells here I better make sure i'm not too obvious to let her know it's the leech.

"He's at the funeral" I said

What now leech? I was waiting for him to ask for bells but I heard nothing... well I guess he hung up the who's afraid of the big bad wolf?. "Filthy bloodsucker," I said while putting down the phone.

I turned to find a very confused Bella

"who did you just hang up on?" she sounded infuriated.

"In my house and on my phone" ok…now she's angry...this is bad...

"Easy! He hung up on me!" well I would be glad to hung up on him.

"He? Who was it?" she said stressing the _**he**_ uh oh…I just got things more complicated... me and my big mouth.

Ok smarty pants what do you wanna answer to her now. Wait...calm down and think... ah ha.."Dr. Carlisle Cullen."

I waited for her reply. Did she buy it? "Why didn't you let me talk to him?" I was relief... good she bought it. Besides it's not my fault that he didn't mention his name.

"He didn't ask for you," I said coldly... what? After all they did her... she wants to talk to them? They left her...alone...in the woods...they didn't even call to check on her after they left... now... after along time he calls .. She wants to speak to them...

"He asked where Charlie was and I told him. I don't think I broke any rules of etiquette." Ok that was harsh... but she deserves it… after what they did to her she still wants them... how could she? I thought she accepted me...she told me clearly that she already accepted...more over she said she had opened her heart for me Jacob Black and not him.

"You listen to me, Jacob Black..." she shouted there was anger in her tone.

I was just about argue with her but I smelled something... I started sniffing.. wait it's the bloodsuckers...Was he here when he called?... was he spying me and bella? The smell was coming from the window...oh so he is outside... I started making my way towards the window...the smell gets stronger as I was getting closer. Oh you are sooo dead leech...i thought as I was planning to punch that leech's face when I see him. I stopped midway when I saw a black hair pixie coming through the window and not that leech.

Wait... whose she? I thought it was that idiot...she's kinda familiar... ah yes... I have seen her a few times with bella... gee why does bella keep hanging out bloodsuckers? But then again I can't let my guard down... I have to protect Bella... she's more important to me now since she's my imprint...

"What do you want bloodsucker" I growled at her.

"None of your concern mutt" even though she is just a pixie she's got a hell of guts, I give her credit for that.

I heard her chocked Bella's name then I saw Bella comforting her. It was so like Bella... always putting others before herself. One of the reasons's why I love her. Based from what I observed...i don't think the pixie is gona harm bells... so I headed towards the window to check whether the pixie brought company along with her.

I turned around when I heard the pixie said "Edward" why does she have to mention that's leech's name.

Can't she see Bella has moved on with me? She just had to ruin it. I saw Bella, her body was shaking... her eyes when wide and her face wore a motionless mask. I could see that she is thinking hard cause when I waved my hand in front of her face but she didn't show any reaction. That filthy bloodsucker...what does he want now? Why can't he just leave her alone... she has me now and forever. Bella doesn't need him. I felt bells body move a bit... her legs seem wobly... oh... no she's not gona fall... I got behind and held her close to me.

"What did you do to her?" I felt bells flinched when she heard my furious voice.

I guess I snapped her from her thoughts. "Bella? Bella, snap out of it. We have to hurry." The pixie ignored me...

oh she is really getting on my nerve now. Hurry? Did she just say hurry? Bells not going anywhere... she is not leaving me... not now... not tomorrow...not forever. Bells is not gona leave me. Does she want to bring bells to meet that leech? It seems like it. Well whatever she is planning its not gona happen. Bells is my imprint and she is staying with me. He is not gona get her

"Stay back," I warned the pixie, if she continues I'm not sure if I can control myself from phasing right here, right now.

"You don't wanna do that so close to her." she odered Well ...well whadya know the pixie is a mind reader or she just sensed me tense. Either way it's none of her concern. I will never hurt Bella, since I imprinted on her. She has become my life, the reason I breathe, the reason I live, its all for her…my life seems to spin around her. It's not me she's suppose to worry about hurting bella. It's her and her family that hurted bella... Not Me. "I don't think I'll have any problem keeping my focus," I retorted.

I heard bells voice as she speaks, it was weak.

" Alice?" oh so the pixie's name is Alice

" What happened?" bells asked... why does she have to ask. She is not gona like the answer but she just have to ask. "I don't know," she suddenly wailed then she continued

"what was he thinking?" well you got that right. He's a idiot. I don't know what that bloodsucker did but i'm very sure he deserves whatever the consequence was, after what he did to bells; he should have just died. I saw bells labored to pull herself up. Oh bells don't please...don't do this... I'm afraid she's gona faint so I wrapped myself around her. I felt her body cold, so I pulled her closer to me. Her back was facing me. I felt her relaxed to my touch.

Then for awhile I listen to the conversation between Bella and the pixie. The pixie called someone, I was waiting if it was the leech. But it turns out to be some girl, Rosalie was her name. I think she's one of them the pixie hung up then bells and her started putting together the information that they got to find out what's going on. The pixie can see future I bet she saw me and bells together but it turns out she saw bells cliff diving.

Then they found out that it was that leech that called just now and that he has dumped his phone somewhere. I guess he got frustrated cause bells mine now. I wonder if he knows that

What? She told that leech that bells was dead. Rosalie is gona pay for that. How could she such a thing? Ok they all left bells, forget her but to think she was dead is unacceptable. So they all want her dead? The next time I saw them, its gona be the the last day of their lifes.

"The response from Jacob on the other end of the phone when he said "He's at the funeral" only served to confirm your death Bella" the pixie said in horror.

What? Oh so now it's my fault for his weird behavior. So now I told him that bells was dead, did I ? I was about shout at the pixie when I heard her say

"Bella... he's gone to meet The Volturi in Italy" what? What's volturi? Or so his too happy that Bella was dead till he went to Italy for a vacation. This is starting to get nonsense.

"Alice we have to safe him. I have to save him" bells said.

At that moment my heart stopped beating, my mind went crazy. I must be dreaming did she just say she has to save him. I grabbed her before she went near her closet

"Bella what are you doing" I asked hoping what I heard was wrong.

"Jacob let me go! I'm going to Italy to save Edward" she said forcefully without looking in my eyes.

What had just happened? She just changed in an instant. A few minutes ago, she was snuggling against me. And now she's shouting.

"What? Bella you couldn't be serious..." I said in disbelief

"I thought you love me, I thought you said that you accepted me. You still want him after what he did to you?" I wait for her to reply. I want to know why she's acting like this.

"Jake..." she started "I do love you but you do know I still love him, Jake he is my life, he's my everything I can't let him die" No she did not say that.

Bells honey please don't break my heart. She wants him after all he did, bells he left you alone in the woods, he should have been there to save you, back when you were almost drowned, if he loved you he should have been there to save you as well. He is the whole reason why you were hurt. I was angry. "Then, what happened between us all these while and just now was all lie?" i asked, while trying to control my temper.

"Jake what happened before was all just friendship... I never put you in my heart in a romantic way" she said. I felt my heart was stabbed. "What happened just now between us was a mistake nothing more" At that instant I let go of her arm.

I can't feel my body, it was numb. Her words echoed in my ears. It was a mistake; she feels that the moment we spent together just now was a mistake. Friendship? So when I confessed my love, when I said everything from heart, every true feeling that I held for her in my heart. She didn't take it seriously. Did she? I was standing right there all the moment and she ignored me as if I weren't there. She went to her closet and got her I.D, passport and I saw her write a letter to Charlie.

No... Jake you are not gona loose her... I rushed to her by the time I got to her she was about to go … her hand was holding the door knob. I hugged her from behind. I held her close, I don't want to let get of her.

"Don't leave... please" I whispered to her, hoping that she would change her mind.

"Please Bella, I beg you... I can't live without you...please don't go...I love you" please don't go Bella,

I can't be apart from you, you are my imprint, my life, the other part of me. I can't lose you. By now I was in tears. I just couldn't accept the fact that after what we shared...all the things that I helped her through..she just threw everything for him. What does he repay her in return? Nothing but trouble. If she hadn't been around him.

That Victoria wouldn't be hunting her down; if she hadn't been around him life would have so much better for her. She can't have a normal life with him. All I want is her happiness, why can't she understand that.?

"Jake ... I'm sorry but I can't accept your love. No one can replace him in my heart and you know that...please don't make this hard, you should understand" I should understand? Bells hear yourself for once.

You played with my feelings bells. You hurted me bells... I love you with all my heart, I never expected anything in return for my love from you, I just want you accept my love that's all. But it seems that you see me as a mistake.

"Jacob please do me a favor" she asked. What bells? Do you my life? Here you can have it. I don't want a life without you. I looked in her eyes. Hoping she would see what I held for her in my heart. She holds the most highest position in my heart. I love her more than myself.

"Could you please take care of Charlie while I'm gone? Please" she pleaded me. Bells...bells you don't seem to understand me do you? You never think what I would feel if you did something. Every action you take has effect on me from now since you're my imprint even before I imprinted on you; it always has effect on me. It's always him. You are so afraid you will loose while you don't even bother me. I meant nothing to you but to me you are everything

"Treaty or no treaty I promise you I will protect Charlie with all my life" I said "is this what you really want bells?" I asked hopefully she changes her mind

"yes, this is what I want ... I need him...i need Edward like I need you, he means a lot to me and if I can't save him... it will hurt me a lot me" it will hurt me if you leave bells. Have you thought that? You need him.? he means a lot to you...?

I see if he is your happiness bells then I'm more than willing to sacrifice my life for your happiness.

"Bells I promise you that I won't hurt you … but if this is what you then I can't do anything" yes bells I promise you, I will never hurt you and will never let anyone hurt you.

Even if you chose him over me, bells I am always here for you. You have hurted me alot but still my love for you will never change. I will always love. There is no other girl in the world that could replace you in my heart. I love you bells, my one and only love and imprint.

I saw her lock the doors, I guess this is it.

Good bye my love. With that I was about to turn but Bella threw her arms around me and kissed the palm of hand. I wish I could stay like this with her but that's selfish, I can't give her the happiness that she wants I better go with that ran towards the woods. I was about to phase but before that I turned to see her for the last time, as I thought, she didn't look back. I lost her. I phased and went in the woods. Bells take care… I love you and I want you to be happy no matter with whom you are.

Just be happy.

**This chapter got me cried.. im soo sorry jacob..(sob..sob)**


	5. Chapter 5 a lonely wolf

**Disclaimer: No, I don't own twilight and TEAM JACOB ALL THE WAY. (Sorry Eddie fans) **

**This chapter is dedicated to jacobfan216, luvinJ, connect2tjb and mommyof3boys. From today onwards I'm gona dedicate the chapters to some of the lucky people who review my is anyone interested in being my beta, I need one..hope my beta is free most of the time cause I update twice a day so it would be easy for me to update. **

**Jacob pov, from when Jacob ran into the woods. There is also slight Jacob pov from twilight when Bella left with Edward to save herself from James. The words in italic are conversation between Jake, embry and Sam in their minds while they were phased in wolf form.**

I saw her lock the doors, I guess this is it. Good bye my love. With that I was about to turn but Bella threw her arms around me and kissed the palm of hand. I wish I could stay like this with her but that's selfish, I can't give her the happiness that she wants I better go, with that I run towards the woods. I was about to phase but before that I turned to see her for the last time, as I thought, she didn't look back. I lost her. I phased and went in the woods. Bells take care… I love you and I want you to be happy no matter with whom you are. Just be happy.

With that, I ran towards the woods, I didn't even undress myself before I phased. I just can't accept the fact that my love, bells could do such a thing to me. But I promised her, I won't hurt her and I will keep my promise; I won't hurt her. Now I have to make a decision. The most important decision of my life. I should take my time so I went to the dept of the woods. The images of her saying it was just a mistake, kept replaying in head like tape. Why does it hurt so much when she left?

It didn't hurt this much when last time she left me. It was before her prom, I go to know through quill that bells school was gona held prom soon so I went over to ask her. But when I reached there, I only saw Charlie, he wasn't acting like usual, his face was pale and he didn't do anything but just sit in the kitchen. I asked him where is bells and he said she left. That's all? She just left... like nothing here was important. I tried searching for her but back then I couldn't phase so I can't cover much ground so I just let it slide aside. I was the happiest man after Charlie I think to have bells back. I wanted to kick that bloodsucker to dead when I heard bells was injured. Thank god it was only her leg.

"Hey, isn't that Jake?" I was startled by embry's voice. How long have I been here? I started to wonder, which is why I didn't notice embry and Sam coming towards me. I was knocked on head by embry cause he thought I ignored him but the truth was I was thinking.

"Guys, could you please phase back. I need to talk to you" I said, wait... when did I phase back to human form myself?. I was wondering again, since bells left me I wasn't myself. Even though it was just a few hours ago she left me, It felt like it was already a century. I turned to see embry and Sam when I heard Sam said "Jake, what's wrong? You look a little pale" great... now im sick.

"Jake you idiot!" what's wrong with embry? "You got all of us worried sick! Where have been the whole the yesterday?" the whole day? Wait it's already a day since bells left me, I guess took my time to think much longer than I thought.

"I'm sorry guys, I just got side track"I said, hoping they won't ask me much more." Sorry... just sorry? Jake! do you know what you made us think?" embry continued, I can see his tone rising bit by bit.

"You got Billy worried,you got Emily worried,you got all of worried! Do you know that! We all thought that red hair caught you, you could at least informed any of us that you were was that important than rather being at the funeral, you got side track?" embry said well practically shouting.

"Calm down embry" Sam said in his normal low voice. I was practically speechless, well first I didn't know I had been out for almost a day and second how am I suppose to tell them what happened. I can't tell them that my imprint left me for her previous lover who so happens to be a bloodsucker.

"Jake, embry lets go home" Sam ordered us "wait, I said I want to talk" I told Sam back, didn't he hear when I said I need to talk. "Whatever it is, im sure it could wait we till get home. It's been awhile since you went back home go back and rest you look pale" with that Sam started walking but immediately stopped when he heard me say "I'm not coming back"

"Why? Are you planning on staying here?" embry asked sarcastically, he wasn't usually like this, I guess I got him upset. I'm sorry embry I whispered. "I'm never coming back" "what?" I heard both of them say that at the same time.

"Jake, this is not the time to joke around, im tired OKAY,we have searching for you since yesterday"embry said in disbelief "embry, sit down. Lets hear what Jacob has to say, I think this important" Sam said, he was the true alpha. He knows when to say what exactly. Not like me, im worthless, I can't even keep my own imprint with me.

"Fine this better be good" embry muttered while sitting on the ground right next to Sam. They were waiting for me say something. I took a long breathe and then started. "Guys. I have imprinted on Bella... and..." before I could continue embry interupted me by hugging me. "So it's true" I heard Sam said.

Embry started to congratulate me; I can see happiness was filled in his face. But i didn't have the heart to tell him the next thing. "Wait, Sam how did know that I have already imprinted on Bella" this is ridiculous, I asked them to phased back so that they can't read my, so that they can't my images with Bella when I was still with her on our special moment.

I turned to look at a blushing embry when he said "oh... that yestreday when Seth was on patrol, he passed through here and he saw the images... (Embry coughing) well u know what I mean, well none of us believed him when he said to us or when he showed to us.

Since we can't sense you, so we thought he was hallucinating. So we asked him to go back home. Wait... did he just say Seth showed _**them**_ the images of me and bella making love? So the whole pack saw it, this is embarrassing.

I gotta change the topic"wait there's more" I said i felt my lips move but nothing came... not a word. "Hurry up Jake ... we're waiting... besides where's bella? I haven't seen her since yesterday." Oh god why can't I just tell them that bells left me for that leech. Why is my body disobeying my command?

"She left me…"I whispered as i hung my head down. "What? Jake what did you to her" embry started shouting at me as if I hurted bells, if only he knew what happened.

"Wait let me finish" with that I continue "she left me, she went to save to him when she heard he was in danger"it hurts to even think about it. "oh... jake ... im so sorry. I...i... didn't know she...wel…. im sorry I shouted at you just now. I didn't know your situation. I'm sorry bro" I just nodded in reply to embry.

I saw his face; his face was dull, as if something bad happened to him. I guess I ruined his mood as well. Man I'm such a pain in the butt. "How could you let her go?" it was Sam. I didn't say anything to reply him. "Jake... I know what you feel? I was in your shoe once" how could you possibly know, you never went through this. I stayed silent.

"I loved Leah with all my heart and soul, I never thought any girl would replace her in my heart … untill" Sam trailed off "until... I saw Emily, when I imprinted on her it was as if my soul was connected to her, as if we were one.

But back then I was still in love with Leah so tried to avoid Emily as much as possible cause I don't want to hurt Leah but eventually I stopped avoiding Emily. I just can't keep on going like that, it hurted a lot. As if thousand knives were stabbed in my heart, I can't sleep at night, I can't eat, I can't do anything, as if I have gone mad. Imprint is your soul mate, once yours always yours thats how strong it is and I can't believe it.

I can't believe that you could just let her go? As if you don't feel anything… Jake why did you let her go?" "She said it was mistake... she said it would her if anything happen to him" I replied sam; I know I left both of them confused not understanding what I just had said. But I can't tell them. I can't tell them the truth. I don't want remember it.

"I'm leaving..." I stressed it. "Jake ... why would you want leave, its her lost that she left you. Don't worry eventually she come to back" embry said trying to reassure me as if everything is gona be ok. "No, the more I stay here, the more I will remember her, the more it will hurt me,.. I'm sorry guys but I can't go through it again. I can't just move on as if nothing happened." I said with all the strength that left in my body.

"So what are you planning on doing?" thanks Sam. I replied Sam "well, planning on leaving la push, I'm going on a hunt. I'm gona hunt that red hair down, as long as she's alive, bells safety is in danger. I can't her hurt bells." Embry said in anger

"look at you Jake! Hear yourself! You want to leave your family and friends for a girl who leaves you for her former lover that had left her. She calls your relationship a mistake! Jake open eyes...look she left you... she doesn't deserve you; moreover she's your imprint. Didn't she feel anything when she left you?"

"Embry... please stop saying like that about bella, whatever she does, she's my imprint. Have some respect" I said the last part in stern. Whatever he said maybe true but I don't want to hurt bells, her happiness is all that matters to me, nothing else.

"You want me to respect a b*tch ? Jake she maybe your imprint but she's acting like a f*cking b*tch. I am your brother and I have the right to…" I pounded him before he could even finish. He has crossed the line, NO ONE. Aint NO ONE can call her like that. He maybe my brother but when it comes to bells, I don't care who it maybe I am gona kill that person who hurts bells or even say something bad about her.

To me bells, my angel, my light, my everything. She may ignore me but I can't do the same to her. By the time I pounded embry, I already phased. I bite his neck first then I aimed for his throat. I brought my paw towards his throat with all the strength but I was stopped from doing something that I was gona regret later on by Sam. Thank god, he got to me before I killed Embry.

What have I done? I attacked a fellow brother, all for her but she…I stopped right there. I'm sorry guys with that I turned behind and ran to the woods. If I stayed there any longer I'm sure. Something bad might happen with the condition I am now; I don't think I can control myself. I'm sure Sam would understand, since he phased just now to stop me in the nick of time. I owe him one. But now, my only intention is getting away from here, I don't want anything getting hurt and besides I'm going on a mission that is to kill that red hair. Bells I promised you, and I will keep my promise.

I arrived at the end of our territory, this is it after I cross this line. I'm never coming back. I replayed back all the things that happened to me and bells all these while. I wanted this to be the last time I ever I remember all these things. I want bells to be happy so if me being there is gona make her situation bad then I better step aside.

Good bye la push…good bye dad... im sorry dad, I know it's my responsibility to take care you but I can't be here after all that happened I just can't. Im sorry for being selfish dad... I'm sure Sam will take care of you in my place. Speaking of Sam, im sorry guys... I don't deserve to be your brother anymore and Sam I know you will be a better alpha than I will ever be.

"_Who said so?"_ I heard Sam's voice in my head. Before I could even I response to Sam both he and embry was in front of me in wolf form. "I'm_ sorry, bro"_ embry said. _"Hey, I'm the suppose to be saying sorry here"_ I said feeling bad that he is saying sorry instead of me. _"Nah! That was nothing, it didn't hurt a bit... we saw everything just now jake"_ embry said in reply. I know very well what he was talking about he was talking about the things that I replayed in my head just now. I should have known they phased.

"_Jake... you are the true alpha! Its in your blood...you are the next alpha...i'm sure you would be the best alpha"_ sam said trying to make me feel betterembry continued by adding what sam said.

_"Guys... I'm sorry... I made my mind and I'm not gona change it." " Jake please thing of us, think what would your dad say when he knows this. You should at least let him know what's going on" _embry replied me_._

_"He will be fine, besides he has the whole pack to help him... What could possibly go wrong"_ I said with a smile on my face trying to hide my true feelings. I listen to Sam's thought _"Jake... I know whatever we say now isn't gona change anything but didn't you promise Bella to protect Charlie? If you go now how are you suppose to keep your promise to her" _

How did he know that? Oh yeah, he must have seen that when I replayed everything just now. But I ignore what he said. He has a point, if I go now. I am breaking my promise to bells. No... I can't leave now. _"Guys I am staying till bells comes back, when she does. I'm leaving… understand?"_ They both nodded. _"Jake go home and rest you seem exhausted. See you soon." _With that Sam left but before he left he asked embry to escorts me back home cause I looked like I was about to faint any moment.


	6. Chapter 6 welcome back romeo part2

**Disclaimer: No, I don't own twilight and TEAM JACOB ALL THE WAY!. (Sorry Eddie fans) **

**A special thanks to jacobfan216 my close friend, and everyone who reviewed. I hope you like this chapter, I'm sorry for my tenses and grammatical errors in my previous chapters and** ** chapter is dedicated to , connect2tjb and gh23. I hope you like this chapter and still looking for a beta to help me. **

**ATTENTION! IF YOU HAVE READ NEW MOON OR WATCH THE MOVIE, YOU CAN SKIP THIS CHAPTER. This chapter has some cutting from the novel new moon chapter 23-the truth.**

We were told to stay in the reception area of the Volturi castle until dark although I don't quite like the idea of being here longer than necessary but we have to obey their order. I learned that Gianna, the only human who is working for the volturi is fully aware of the Volturi's feeding practices and hopes to become one of them, just thinking about it disgusts me.

I was sitting on Edward's lap, with him hugging me close. It's been a long since I have been this happy well I was happy when I was Jacob but Edward is my soul mate, no one can replace his place in my heart. I love Jacob but not in a romantic way. Even in the midst of the danger, I still feel happy to be with Edward, there tons of reason why I should be happy: well basically we are both alive, together and will be alive tomorrow. But deep down in my heart I still have fear that Edward might leave as soon as the opportunity arises. I don't want him to leave; it's just too much to take. I can't go through the same zombie path I was a few months ago. At least back then I had Jacob to comfort me but after all that happened I left him and I don't think Jacob will comeback to me again. That's something I better get use to.

I turned to look upon a flawless, godlike man whom I love with all my heart. I missed him a lot, nothing can replace Edward in my heart not even Jacob but sometimes when I was with Jacob I forget about Edward. Never the less, now we are together and nothing is gona change that fact. My eyes met with his, it was still the same but something's different. I looked closely at to find the difference, his pupil was in onyx. Uh oh... ok this is not good. I offered to move from Edward's lap because he appears hungry but instead He assures me that, "I've never been in better control of that side of my nature than right now." ok... I think that much information is enough so i avoid asking questions, hoping that i can delay Edward's exit.

Meanwhile, Alice and Edward plan the return trip. Edward explains that the Volturi refers me his "la tua cantante" because my blood sings for him. Well that's kinda creepy, but you know I'm a danger magnet so basically my blood sings for him does make sense. Then Alec arrives to release us, atlast we going away from this place. We hurried away through the festival crowd. Alice using her many illegal skills again steals another car to get us to the airport. On the airplane, I refuse to sleep, I then point out to Edward that I will still have those nightmares if i sleep. I heard Alice call Jasper to communicate their success and to arrange for the family to meet us at the airport. Ok family reunion at the air port not a very good place for reunion but then again I missed them a lot. I felt a clod icy hand hold my hand, I turn to find Edward it was, and he starts kissing my hand and then touches it. I was aching for this for a long time but why is he doing it now. Wait don't tell me he's leaving me again. I try not show any signs of me worrying just incase if he feels it. He might leave and I don't want that. I tried my best hiding my true feelings.

As soon as we arrived at the air port we were greeted by the Cullens; Jasper, Carlisle and Esme waited for us inside. Each of them was expressing their gratitude to me for saving Edward and chastises Edward's suicidal behavior. I wondered where the other two Cullens were, esme then told me that Emmett and Rosalie was waiting for us outside. Edward reluctantly allows Emmett and Rosalie to drive us home. Rosalie apologizes to Edward, then to me, I forgive her immediately. This is new, I noted that this is the first time that Rosalie has spoken directly to me.

We were about a stone away from my house; all that I have in mind now is Charlie. Ok how am I suppose explain my absents for 3 days to Italy. I felt my shoulder being shaked, when I turned to look; it was Edward pointing straight ahead. I turned to look what he was pointing. It was infact a very angry Charlie. Ok just great Bella I grunted, of all the chaos that happen I really don't want to face Charlie now. The car stopped, with a deep breathe I stepped out of the car with Edward following right behind me. "Where have you been bells" I heard Charlie shouted with anger and sending invisible daggers to Edward. "Dad, I can explain" I started, ooh this is gona be a long day, I just know it. "Oh you better have an explanation young lady, cause you're in a lot of trouble" I was fidgeting my hands while trying to make an excuse. I never was a good liar and this is just hard, and plus I was tired. I traveled all the way from forks to Italy and then back here in 3 days not to mention while I was in Italy I was in Italy facing a bunch man-eating vampires. All of a sudden, my surrounding was beginning to be dizzy and then the moment moment It was all pitch black. The last thing I heard was Edward saying "sir, I can explain... it's not Bella's fault"

I had the sense that I'd been asleep for a very long time; my body was stiff, like I hadn't moved once through all that time, either. My mind was dazed and slow; strange, colorful dreams. Dreams and nightmares all swirled dizzily around the inside of my head. The horrible and the heavenly all mixed together into a bizarre jumble. There was sharp impatience and fear, both part of that frustrating dream where your feet can't move fast enough... This dream did not want to be shoved away into the vault of dreams I refused to revisit. I struggled with it as my mind became more alert, focusing on reality. I couldn't remember what day of the week it was, but I was sure school or work or something was waiting for me or maybe Jacob... I knew what I did was wrong I left him after all he gave; he was there when I needed him the most. He was patience with me not rushing me into anything that I didn't like. Most of all he loved me for who I am but I know it wasn't right for me to be with him. I know I hurted him but I just had to do it. I inhaled deeply, wondering how to face another day.

Something cold touched my forehead with the softest pressure.

I squeezed my eyes more tightly shut. I was still dreaming, it seemed, and it felt abnormally real. I was so close to waking... any second now, and it would be gone.  
But I realized that it felt too real, too real to be good for me. The stone arms I imagined  
wrapped around me werefar too substantial. If I let this go any further, I'd be sorry for it  
later. With a resigned sigh, I wrenched back my eyelids to dispel the illusion.

"Oh!" I gasped, and threw my fists over my eyes.

Well, clearly, I'd gone too far; it must have been a mistake to let my imagination get so out of hand. Okay, so "let" was the wrong word. I'd forced it to get out of hand.. pretty much stalked my hallucinations and now my mind had snapped. It took less than half a second for me to realize that, as long as I was truly insane now, I might as well enjoy the delusions while they were pleasant. I opened my eyes again and Edward was still there, his perfect face just inches away from mine.

"Did I frighten you?" His low voice was anxious. This was very good, as delusions went. The face, the voice, the scent, everything it was so much better than drowning. The beautiful figment of my imagination watched my changing expressions, with alarm. His irises were pitch-black, with bruise-like shadows under them. This surprised me; my hallucinatory Edwards were usually better fed. I blinked twice, desperately trying to remember the last thing that I was sure was real. Alice was part of my dream, and I wondered if she had really come back at all, or if that was just the preamble. I thought she'd returned the day I'd nearly drowned...

"Oh, crap" I croaked. My throat was thick with sleeping. "What's wrong, Bella?"  
I frowned at him unhappily. His face was even more anxious than before. "I'm dead, right?" I moaned. "I did drown. Crap, crap, crap! This is gonna kill Charlie." Edward frowned, too. "You're not dead." "Then why am I not waking up?" I challenged, raising my eyebrows. "You are awake, Bella." I shook my head. "Sure, sure. That's what you want me to think. And then it will be worse when I do wake up. If I wake up, which I won't, because I'm dead. This is awful. Poor Charlie. And Renee and Jake..." I trailed off in horror at what I had done." I can see where you might confuse me with a nightmare." His short-lived smile was grim. "But I can't imagine what you could have done to wind up in hell. Did you commit many murders while I was away?"  
**  
**I grimaced. "Obviously not. If I was in hell, you wouldn't be with me." He sighed.  
My head was getting clearer. My eyes flickered away from his face unwillingly for one second, to the dark, open window, and then back to him. I started to remember details... and I felt a faint, unfamiliar blush warm the skin over my cheekbones as I slowly realized that Edward was really, truly here with me, and I was wasting time being an idiot. "Did all of that really happen, then?" It was almost impossible to reassign my dream as reality. I couldn't wrap my head around the concept. "That depends." Edward's smile was still hard. "If you're referring to us nearly being massacred in Italy, then, yes."  
"How strange," I mused but deep down I was wondering was it true that I slept with Jacob, I'm so sorry Edward I cheated on you. I didn't want it to be that way but at that time it just felt so right. I tried to stop before we got further but I was consumed by lust.

I better change the subject before he gets suspicious "I really went to Italy. Did you know I'd never been farther east than Albuquerque?" He rolled his eyes. "Maybe you should go back to sleep. You're not coherent." "I'm not tired anymore." It was all coming clear now. "What time is it? How long have I been sleeping?" "It's just after one in the morning. So, about fourteen hours." I stretched as he spoke. I was so stiff. "Charlie?" I asked.

"Well…" Edward started; his facial expression shows that something went bad between Charlie and him. Edward tells me that Charlie band him from the house. "Charlie banned you from the house?" I asked, disbelief quickly melting into fury. His eyes were sad. "Did you expect anything else?" My eyes were mad. I was going to have a few words with my father, perhaps it would be a good time to remind him that I was over the legal age of adulthood. It didn't matter so much, of course, except in principle. All too soon there would be no reason for the prohibition. I turned my thoughts to less painful avenues. "What's the story?" I asked, genuinely curious, but also trying desperately to keep the conversation casual, to keep a firm grip on myself, so I wouldn't scare him away with the frantic, gnawing craving that was raging inside me. "What do you mean?" "What am I telling Charlie? What's my excuse for disappearing for... how long was I gone, anyway?" I tried to count the hours in my head. "Just three days." His eyes tightened, but he smiled more naturally this time. "Actually, I was hoping you might have a good explanation. I've got nothing." I groaned. "Fabulous." "Well, maybe Alice will come up with something," he offered, trying to comfort me. And I was comforted. Who cared what I had to deal with later? Every second that he was here, so close, his flawless face glowing in the dim light from the numbers on my alarm clock; was precious and not to be wasted.

I cautiously start to question Edward about what he did while he was away, choosing the least important question first, what have you been doing? Edward responds by saying nothing exciting. "Of course not," I mumbled. "Why are you making that face?"  
"Well..." I pursed my lips, considering. "If you were, after all, just a dream, that's exactly the kind of thing you would say. My imagination must be used up." After a few attempt at last Edward finally admits the truth that he was tracking Victoria. Edward begins to apologize to me for leaving me in danger. Ha, really? I was in danger, well gee what do you, I was in danger. I guess I was too busy being zombie and mourning my lost of till I didn't realize that I was in danger. He continue, He said didn't realize Victoria had such a response in killing me because he was too busy concentrating on James. He admits that he felt sick after hearing what i told Alice and seeing for himself what Alice saw. I stopped him, thinking he is apologizes out of guilt and nothing else. All I want is him to be happy no matter what it costs me.

I began to tell him that the things that happened while he was away were not his fault. I felt the ghost of the hole waiting it rip open when he disappears again. I strictly told him that he can't go off to Italy because of the choices I make. Well I was surprise that Edward is stunned that I think the only reason he went to Italy was because he felt guilty. Well isn't he guilty? Then he starts to explain that he can't live in a world where i don't exist. He said "Before you, Bella, my life was like a moonless night. Very dark, but there were stars points of light and reason... And then you shot across my sky like a meteor. Suddenly everything was on fire; there was brilliancy, there was beauty. When you were gone, when the meteor had fallen over the horizon, everything went black. Nothing had changed, but my eyes were blinded by the light. I couldn't see the stars anymore. And there was no more reason for anything." Ok now I'm totally confused, this doesn't make any senses at all. " I thought you said **' **_**I promise that this will be the last time you'll see me. I won't come back. I won't put you through anything like this again. You can go on without any more interference from me. It will be as if I'd never existed' "**_then he explains to me he is a good liar but for me to believe him so quickly was excruciating. Ok now I am very sure I'm dreaming. It has to be me dreaming. It's just not possible for him to love me. But then I felt his breathe, I opened my eyes to see Edward leaning in to kiss me but I ask him not to, I told him it would too hard when he leaves me.

I was taken by surprise when I heard Edward ask me if there is someone else, if that is the reason that I was so hesitant every time he touched me and that can I still love him after everything that has happened. Omg! How am I suppose to explain to him that I and Jacob had slept together? Was it too obvious that I still have feelings for Jacob. No I can't, I love Edward and I am gona be loyal to him. I told him that the way i feels about him will never change, I will always love him. Then I felt his lips against me, it was a long passionate kiss but I wasn't happy about it. When I was kissing Edward, the only thing in my mind was Jacob. Why am I feeling guilty? It wasn't like I and Jake dated or anything we were just mere friends who did something stupid. It was just a mistake nothing more. , in the brief seconds when his lips were free, he whispered my name. Then he explains that he isn't leaving. He tells me that he only wanted me to have a happy human life. Human life without him? No way, if I was to have a life it has to be with him or else I don't want that life. He continued, he said no matter how many miles he puts between us, I can't be safe. Edward explains to me that his feeling were like mine when we were apart. See I told you we are soul mates, Edward don't you think it's about time you accept that fact?

Well, I am not as concerned with Victoria returning at all, I have much bigger problems; like Charlie, how am I suppose answer him and Jake .. I started laughing when I heard Edward said he thinks the werewolves are problem for me. What was he thinking, without the werewolves I'm sure by now I'm dead. I told him that the second biggest problem is the Volturi coming to check on me. He said in his old calm tone that he has a plan. Wait did he just say he has a plan? Maybe he's gona change me, well it's about time. I asked him are you gona change me and to my surprise he refuse then what the heck is the plan?. Why is this guy so stubborn? Just change me already.

"But what about when I get so old that people think I'm your mother? Your grandmother?" My voice was pale with revulsion; I could see Gran's face again in the dream mirror. His whole face was soft now. He brushed the tears from my cheek with his lips. "That doesn't mean anything to me," he breathed against my skin. "You will always be the most beautiful thing in my world. Of course..." He hesitated, flinching slightly. "If you outgrew me ...if you wanted something more. I would understand that, Bella. I promise I wouldn't stand in your way if you wanted to leave me." His eyes were liquid onyx and utterly sincere. He spoke as if he'd put endless amounts of thought into this asinine plan. "You do realize that I'll die eventually, right?" I demanded. He'd thought about this part, too. "I'll follow after as soon as I can." "That is seriously..."I looked for the right word."Sick." "Bella, it's the only right way left" "Let's just back up for a minute," I said; feeling angry made it so much easier to be clear, decisive. "You do remember the Volturi, right? I can't stay human forever. They'll kill me. Even if they don't think of me till I'm thirty" I hissed the word" do you really think they'll forget?"  
"No," he answered slowly, shaking his head. "They won't forget. But..." "But?" He grinned while I stared at him warily. Maybe I wasn't the only crazy one. "I have a few plans." "And these plans," I said, my voice getting more acidic with each word. "These plans all center around me staying human." My attitude hardened his expression. "Naturally." His tone was brusque, his divine face  
arrogant.

We glowered at each other for a long minute. Then I took a deep breath, squared my shoulders, I pushed his arms away so that I could sit up. "Do you want me to leave?" he asked, and it made my heart flutter to see that this idea hurt him, though he tried not to show it. "No," I told him. "I'm leaving." He watched me suspiciously as I climbed out of the bed and fumbled around in the dark room, looking for my shoes. "May I ask where you are going.'" he asked. "I'm going to your house," I told him, still feeling around blindly. He got up and came to my side. "Here are your shoes. How did you plan to get there?" "My truck." "That will probably wake Charlie," he offered as a deterrent.  
I sighed. "I know. But honestly, I'll be grounded for weeks as it is. How much more trouble can I really get in?" "None. He'll blame me, not you." "If you have a better idea, I'm all ears." "Stay here," he suggested, but his expression wasn't hopeful. "No dice. But you go ahead and make yourself at home," I encouraged, surprised at how natural my teasing sounded, and headed for the door. He was there before me, blocking my way.

I frowned, and turned for the window. It wasn't really that far to the ground, and it was  
mostly grass beneath... "Okay," he sighed. "I'll give you a ride." I shrugged. "Either way. But you probably should be there, too." "And why is that?" "Because you're extraordinarily opinionated, and I'm sure you'll want a chance to air your views." "My views on which subject?" He asked through his teeth. "This isn't just about you anymore. You're not the center of the universe, you know." My own personal universe was, of course, a different story. "If you're going to bring the Volturi down on us over something as stupid as leaving me human, then your family ought to have a say." "A say in what?" he asked, each word distinct.

"My mortality. I'm putting it to a vote."


	7. Chapter 7 good bye my love

**Disclaimer: No, I don't own twilight and yes, I hate Edward. (Sorry Eddie fans)**

**This chapter is dedicated to jacobfan216, and my loyal fan all of you enjoythis chapter of jacob…am still looking for a beta to help…**

**Jacob pov, from when Jacob was going back home to rest The words in italic are conversation between Jake, embry and Sam in their minds while they were phased in wolf form.**

"_Jake go home and rest you seem exhausted. See you soon." _With that Sam left but before he left he asked embry to escorts me back home cause I looked like I was about to faint any moment. Embry kept talking to get me distracted while we are on our way home_. "Hey Jake, can I ask you something?"_ I turned to look at him _"what?"_ _"No... It's just... well...you know I respect your relationship with Bella but..."_ _"Stop right there"_ I said in anger while glaring at him. Is embry trying to pick a fight again? I don't think I can't control my temper much longer and the condition might get worse since I'm already phased in wolf form_. "No ... Jake just hear me out"_ embry pleaded.

"_No ... whatever you have to say just keep it to yourself_" I snapped at him. _"Jake, how am I suppose to do that, you can know whatever that's going through my head, I am phased... can't you see?_ Embry said as if I didn't notice that his phased. _"Then stop thinking about me and Bella! Besides it's none of your business to interfere in my relationship with her" _I continued walking, ok that was harsh. I thought to myself; I heard embry yell in my mind _"ya think?"_ dam I forgot that his phased _"hell yeah, you forgot I phased"_ embry continued. Urggh...this is getting annoying. _"Huh? What did say? I can't hear ya clear Jake"_ I know very well embry did that so that he could have my attention.

"_Ok ... you got me, I'm all ears, spill it faster" _I said in annoyed tone. _"Finally"_ embry muttered. _"But I am warning you, if this goes over the limit. I won't hesitate to kill you"_ I warned him. **"It wont, you have my word"** he replied. He _continued "Jake... I am not complaining or trying to offend. Just hear me out ok? This is my point of view of your situation and I want you to know if what you are doing is the right thing. If that is what you really want"_. I sighed _"here we go again" "Jake ...she left you after you healed her, you were there when she needed you, and she goes off when you need her and what you are trying to do now is leaving us, your family to track down a leech who's coming after her" _he paused waiting for my reply _" well .. What's your point"_ I asked him back_. "Jake, you have got to be kidding me! Open your eyes, look around...what do you see?"_ he asked...i answered him _"err... trees and leaves"_ he stared at me for awhile he said disbelief _"Jake, I think you hit your head somewhere yesterday. You better take pills before you go to bed. And well basically yeah we are surrounded by trees and leaves but that's not my point". _

He sighed and then continued _"Jake ...look she's not here but we are. You don't have to do this for her. She doesn't deserve it. You have done enough for her. Just stop thinking about her; putting her needs before you. This isn't how its suppose to be. I'm sorry man... I feel bad for you. As a brother I feel helpless since you won't let me help you." "You don't have to do anything. I got all figured out. And embry I can't stop thinking about her, I love her; it's my duty to protect my imprint_" _"heck no.!! you are freaking wrong!"_ by now embry was yelling _" if she is your imprint, she would have felt hurt just like you when she left, Jake you can protect if she listens to you but no she keeps running to danger. Even now she went for that bloodsucker after all you warning. Jake you don't need her, she clearly states that she needs him and not you but we... need you. Please don't go_"

"_Embry, you better get going. I can see Billy from here... bye..."_ with that I phased, I didn't even wait for his respone; hopefully he understands to respect my decision from now on. Now I have bigger problems. Where in the heck are my clothes? Well it's just dad, it's not like he has never seen me naked before, he won't mind. With that I made my way from the woods to my house. I heard dad's wheelchair made a noise, he's approaching me, I don't think I want to talk to anyone now. So I try to avoid him, so I made my way straight to my room. "Where do you think you are going" dang... he is fast even when he is in the wheelchair. "Dad, I'm gona get dressed" "we need to talk, I will wait for you in the kitchen" oh boy… this is gona be long. I took out my sweat shirt and shorts from the cupboard and well I started to clean up my room. I want to delay this talk as much as I can.

I came out of my room an hour later, I'm sure he would have let go of 'the talk' he wanted.., but my mistake. I saw dad still waiting for me in the kitchen. An hour passed by but he's still there. Man!.. He's stubborn. I guess that's where I get my stubbornness from. Well I still have chance to avoid it, so I headed to the living room. "Jake, come here" I heard him call as soon as he saw me avoid him "dad, I'm tired. I don't wanna talk now" not now and forever. "No, we need to talk now" he was stressing every word. "Dad, there's nothing to talk about, I don't want any one lecturing me about my actions. I'm old enough to think for my own" well I guess I was kinda harsh but if it's the only way to make him stop questioning me then I have no other choice. "Jacob eupherium black! you listen to me. I am your father and I have all the rights to question your strange behavior." Well apparently that didn't go as I planned. I remained silence; not wanting to complicate the situation more. At first he looked furious after awhile his facial expression changed to a calmer state. "Jake, what happened? Did something happen?" he said with a concerned look on his face. I shook my head and said "no, nothing dad..." "Jake, you're my son. I know you well enough. There is something wrong. You know you can tell me anything right? You trust your old man right?" man! He is making this hard. "Did something happen between you and Bella?" I turned to look at him in the eye when he mentioned bells name. "Ooh, soo that's your problem." "No, not at all. What makes you think that?" I shot him back. "Well by the look on your face just now, I think it's her. And by the way Charlie called yesterday and he said Bella left home with Alice; he said in the note, it is stated that Bella said it's urgent. Care to explain son?"

"No ... I didn't know that bells left home" I lied. "When did she left?" I asked trying to act as if I didn't know. "Jake... you and I both know that you are involved in this. Sam told me yesterday that you couldn't attend Harry's funeral because you went to see Bella. And right after your visit all this happen. " He said while raising an eye brow. "coincidence"I replied lamely. "Jake ... stop fooling around. As your father I have the right to know... Jake please just tells what's going on" he said as if I'm going to tell. "Dad... there's nothing going on. Bella probably had some work to do and stop asking me as if I know everything. " with that I stormed to the living room. I turned on the TV and started flipping the channels, i tried to concentrate on the TV but my mind kept thinking bells, then I heard something in the kitchen.

So I ran to the kitchen, and guess what? I saw a glass bowl shattered on the floor, dad tried to get the bowl but I guess he didn't reach it. I saw trying pick up the broken pieces of the glass. "Dad its ok, I can take care of this." I said reassuring him. "No son, I can't handle it. I don't need your help since you don't need mine anymore." He said sarcastically. Ooh boy... now he's sulking. "Dad, come on. I told you I don't know anything about bells and nothing is going on with me" "then swear to me that you are telling the truth" he said, while glaring at me in the eye. "Fine, what do you wanna know ?" I just can't take it. "Well, for starting, why did Bella left?" Starting?? There's more... oh brother… "Well she got a phone call stating that leech was in danger, so she left to save him" I muttered in anger. "You mean Edward?" he asked disbeliefly. "Yeah, him" I said not wanting to even mention his name. "I thought Charlie said you two were dating?" what!! "No dad, we never dated, happy now? Is there anything else you want to know?!" why did he have to bring it up?

"Calm down son, I understand your feelings. It's ok. You tried your best to protect her but if she chooses to be with them, there's nothing we can do." Yeah right dad, you want me to calm down when my imprint is with a bunch of bloodsuckers and I'm here helpless. Way to go dad. "Besides, it's not that you can't find another girl. You just need some time to adjust that's all." How can I possibly move on over my imprint, it would have been easier if she was just Bella, my best friend and not my imprint but even so I don't regret imprinting her? "Dad I'm going to bed, I will see you in the morning and if Sam called ask him to put some one on patrol at Charlie's house" with that I made my to bed. I lied there staring at the ceiling; thinking of the things that happened to me in the past few days. It all seems as if it's all a dream but yet it's the reality. Bells left with that pixie yesterday and today it's almost coming to an end; it's just the end of second day after bells left me but it feels as if half of me is dead. I feel so lifeless. I lay on the bed waiting sleep to approach me but it seems that it isn't going to. I heard the phone ring twice, I was about to get up to get the phone but it stopped. I guess dad took the call; it must be Sam so I fell back on the bed hoping to get some shut eye. I felt my eyes got heavier and heavier and then it's all pitch-black.

[The next morning]

I got up by the sound of my alarm, it is 11.00 am. Great, I overslept. Then I showered, when I came out of the bathroom I smelled pancakes... emm... yummy... I quickly got dressed and I went to the kitchen counter I saw dad flipping pancakes. So I helped myself with a few pancakes and milk. "Sleep well?" my dad asked. "Emm... yeah, never been better" I lied while a putting on my famous Jacob smile. "Really, good" well the rest went as usual. After we had breakfast, I started doing the dishes. That's when it happened. "So Jake..." "Yeah ...dad?" I said while wiping the plate. He then continue "what were you and Bella doing before she left?" well... gee... dad , we made love and you wanna know the best of it, I imprinted on her and you know what happened next she left. "Well the usual, we just talked. That's all" I said, I made it short and simple. "Oh but you forgot to mention the part, you imprinted on her?" I didn't reply him, I just glared at him. How in the heck, did he knew that "Sam told me yesterday" he said as if he read my mind. "Is it true?" he asked. I just nodded in reply. "How are you handling this Jake? Even after your mom passed away; it's been a few years already but still I feel hurt. As if there's a hole in my heart. And here you are standing as if nothing happened" "what do you want me to do dad? Kill myself? I wish I could and I will as soon as I finish my duty." "Jake stops talking nonsense!" he was yelling at me. "Dad, it's the truth. As soon as bells get here. I'm out of here, I got some things to handle on my own" I said trying to keep my emotion under control. "Some things?? As in?" he kept asking. Well lke hunting down that red-hair which is keep messing with my imprint but I won't tell you that dad. "I'm sorry dad but it's personal" I said. "Fine but don't even think of coming back here, if you leave" "dad, its ok. Besides I don't have any intention of coming back." I shot at him back. With that I left. I went out, I phased as soon as I could and I just ran into the woods not caring about anything.

I don't care what anyone thinks. I made up my mind and I going to follow it since it's the only way bells and I both won't have to suffer. If I stay it would just make her relationship more complicated and I don't want bells hurt because of me and if I did stay it would make me hurt as well seeing my girl; my imprint in the hand of another. I couldn't bear it. Now I'm heading to Charlie's, to check out on him, the closer I get to Charlie's house the more the stench gets strong. I stopped to determine what smell it was. Wait. It's the leech. Oh god she's after Charlie. I got to go quick… with that I ran with all the strength I had in me. I arrived there a short while later, on my way I informed the pack about my discovery but its turned out it was bells. She came back; Seth is on patrol now so he told us. Well I was shouting at Seth for not telling me about bells return sooner. He replied that he was scared that I would leave as soon as I got to know bells return. I understand his concerned but I have the right to know what's happening to bells. Before I meet bells, I want to know what happened here, so I talked to Seth first before meeting bells.

"_Seth... how is she? When did she arrive? Did Charlie scold her?" _I asked him. _"Yes, she's fine. Just a few hours ago with a few leeches and yes, he was about to scold her but she fainted before he even began."_ "_What?! She fainted?! Bye Seth"._ With that I was about to phased back to human form to check on bells. But then I was pushed to the side by Seth _"hey what was that for?"_I yelled at him._ "Jake, you didn't even let me finish. Hold your horses. Yes she fainted, and the leech brought her into the house but I saw her leaving with the leech, a few minutes ago_." _"What?"_ I asked him in disbelief. I guess I lost her for good this time. "Jake_ stops saying that!!" _I forgot he is phased, so am i._ "I'm sorry, well I better get going. Bye" "Jake wait... Are you leaving?" "No" _I lied to him with that I ran back home not waiting for his response. As soon I as got there I phased back. Well she's here happy with that bloodsucker; I guess its time for me to leave. I ran through my clothes, I changed to my new sweat shirt and shorts. After I finished clearing up everything, I wrote a note to dad and I left at the kitchen counter. I stood outside my house; while staring at it for a while. This is home, where I grew up. I have never thought of leaving it but I guess things change over time. So do human, bells and I were happy back when we were still kids but now …I started remembering back everything both I and bells shared. Then it hit me, bells bike. It's still with me. Well it's her's but charlie would kill her if he knew it's hers but I want her to have to it. It has so much memories of me in it. Atleast whenever she looks at it, she would remember me. I gotta give it back to her but Charlie would know. I started thinking for an excuse to give to Charlie about this bike, then I got it, so I sat down and wrote a note to give to bells.

I left my garage and into the woods. I arrived at Charlie's very quick this time. I was standing in front of bells house door for awhile. Man! I'm so dam nervous. Man up Jake! I thought to myself. Ok here goes nothing, and then I knocked the door. It took Charlie a while before he got it. "Oh hey Jake, come in. I will wake up bells for you, she is sleeping now" Charlie said in his usual tone. "No... No... Its ok…"well I guess bells left without Charlie's permission "oh so, is there an other reason for you to be here?" "Well, yes sir. You see I'm going to visit my relation in the south and well it might be awhile for me to be back. So I wanted to give bells her present for her next birthday in advance." i said...with a sad tone. "Oh, well I'm sure bells would be happy to have it, south you say? Well can't you delay your trip a bit there has been some bear sighting here and its dangerous for you move around and is Billy going with you?" "Yes south sir, no I'm afraid if I don't go now. I might disappoint them since they are expecting me soon. Don't worry, I'm sure this old Jake can take care of himself and just me. dad's gona stay behind but he will catch up later" I chuckled as if dad even knows that I'm leaving. "Ok, you be sure to take care of yourself ok? If anything happens to you bells would be broken you know?" well she's the whole reason of my departure. Charlie interrupted "uh not wanting to be rude or anything but where's the gift boy?" "Oh yeah, sorry I forgot." I brought bells bike from the side of Charlie's house to the front door. "So where is it?" he asked. "Well this is it" I said while patting the bike "wait what! You bought her a bike? Jacob black! What did you get the money from to buy her this? did ya rob a bank or something?" "No ...no... I bought from the parts from the dumpster and the rest I got for half price from a friend" man... I'm a hell of a liar…!! "Oh ... but seriously you shouldn't have. Besides she doesn't even know how to ride a bike." "No... No you must accept it. It's my gift to Bella and I'm sure you can teach her." "Well I better get going... see you" "ooh so soon... well ok then. Do you want to leave a message for bells?" " uhmm.. No sir... but… I guess you could help me. Could you pass this note to bells?" "Yeah ... sure jake... take care ok...you are not only billy's son mine as well ok" I only smile in reply. Good bye my love, I will always love you bella.


	8. Chapter 8 a letter to juliet

**Disclaimer: no, I don't own twilight and yes I hate Edward...**

**All hail Jacob!!** **Team Jacob all the way...**

**This chapter is dedicated to jacobfan216, connect2tjb and LunarFairyPrincess1989. Well this chapter is Charlie's pov and guess what? in a few more chapters, something big is gona happen. Maybe in a two or 3 more chappie ... Jacob's luck might change. So pls continue reading my story and I'm trying to speed up stuff so I could get to the good part by Xmas.**

"I'm so sorry about Harry, dad."bells swung her arms around me envoloping into a hug. "I'm really going to miss him, " I mumbled. " how's sue doing?" bells asked in corncerned." She seems dazed, like she hasn't grasped it yet. Sam's staying with her…" the volume of in my voice faded in and out. " Those poor kids. Leah's just a year older than you, and seth is only fourteen…" I shook my head. "um..dad, you will never guess who's here?" I looked at her .. no.. its not who I think is it? I swiveled my head and there it was a mercedes across the street. I was just about to shout at bella . " hi charlie," wait that didn't sound right. That's not edward. "I'm sorry I came at such a bad time."

I peered at the slight figure in front of me. "alice cullen?" Am I hallucinating? " alice is that you?" I asked making sure if this is reality. " its me" she confirmed. "I was in the neighbourhood."ok if she's here then ..he.. "Is Carlisle…?"she replied before I even finished my question. "No, I'm alone." That's good, thanks god. I would have chased that guy out of my house if he ever shows his face here again. I tightened my arma over bells shoulder.

"She can stay here, can't she ?" bells asked with pleading eyes. " I already asked her." "Of course," I said mechanically, well its just alice. So.. no worries . "we'd love to have you, Alice." "Thank you, Charlie. I know it's horrid timing." Alice said. As always Alice being polite. One of her good trades. horrid timing? Its great timing, I was planning to call jake to keep bells company while I'm gona help sue. But since she's here. Problem solved. "No, it's fine, really. I'm going to be really busy doing what I can for Harry's family;it will be nice for Bella to have some company." "There's dinner for you on the table, Dad," bells told me. "Thanks, Bell." I gave her one more squueze on the hand before I shuffled towards the kitchen. All the activities today had made me have quiet an appitite.

I saw alice went back to the couch and bells followed her.i continued eating, since I can't hear anything what the girls were talking. After a while, alice came in here, she sat with me. " So did you miss us while we were gone? I'm sorry, we didn't tell you first about our departure, it was all so sudden that we didn't even say good bye " " well I only missed you" I said stressing it hopefully she gets my message about not wanting to hear about her brother. I continued "well yes it was all so sudden. I was told that it was because of carlisle transffer ?" "yes, dad got a sudden transffer. It was out of the blue"

There was silence for a while, " do you want to eat?" "no, I think I'll pass it" " come on, ok I know my cooking is bad. But my toast and bacon is good" I said trying to get her agreed. " besides, you are my guest and I insist you" finally she agrees " if you say so" I cleaned up the table and started fixing alice breakfast.

.

"How bad was it, Charlie?" Alice asked, she didn't need to give me more description. I know very well, what she was asking about.i sighed. "Real bad." " Tell me about it. I want to know exactly what happened when we left."

I paused, how am I suppose to say this?"I've never felt so helpless," I began slowly. "I didn't know what to do. That first week-I thought I was going to have to hospitalize her. She wouldn't move. Dr Gerandy was throwing around words like 'catatonic,' but I didn't let him up to see her. I was afraid it would scare her." "She snapped out of it though?" she said reasuring me. "I had Renee come to take her to Florida. I just didn't want to be the one… if she had to go to a hospital or something. I hoped being with her mother would help. But when we started packing her clothes, she woke up with a vengeance. I've never seen Bella throw a fit like that. She was never one for the tantrums, but , boy, did she fly into a fury. She threw her clothes everywhere and sceramed that we couldn't make her leave-and then she finally started crying. I thought that would be the turning point.I didn't argue when she insisted on staying here….and she did seem to get better at first…" I trailed off.. "But ?" Alice prompted. "She went back to school and work, she ate and slept and did her homework. She answered when someone asked her a direct question. Butrshe was… empty. Her eyes wre blank. There were lots of little things-she wouldn't listen to music anymore;I found a bunch of CD's broken in the trash. She didn't read; she wouldn't be in the same room when the TV wan on, not that she watched it so much before. I finally figured it out. She was avoiding everything that might remind her of …him. That idiot, I thought he was a gentle man, the way he acted was as if he was perfect. Just thinking about him makes me angry. "we could hardly talk; I was so worried about saying something that would upset her.. the listest things would make her flinch.. and she never volunteered anything. She would make her flinch and she would just answer if I asked her something. She didn't call her friends back, and after a while, they stopped calling. 'it was night of the living dead around here. I still hear her screaming in her sleep…" those days.. I wish bells was back to her old self. "I'm sorry charlie," alice said, her was voice glum. "it's not your fault." I made it perfectly clear that it was edward's I think she understand that " you were always a good friend to her."she changed the topic, smart girl I say. Alice said, some change in her tone. "she seems better now, though"

" yeah, ever since she started hanging out with jacob black, I have noticed a real improvement . she has some colour in her cheecks when she comes home, some light in her eyes. She's happier." I paused, I spoke in a different tone making sure she gets message " he's a year or so younger than her, and I know she use to think him as a friend, but I think maybe its something more now, or headed that direction anyway." They are dating, I'm sure of that. They have been spending so much time together lately, well I wouldn't say jake perfect. He has his ups and downs , he's in a gang with the _reservation_ boys but he takes care of bells very well and that's what that matters " Jake's old for his years," I continued sounding defensive. If you ask me, I would be glad to have jake as my son-inlaw " Hes taken care of his father pyhsically the way bella took care of her mother emotionally. It matured him. Hes good looking kid, too.. takes after his mom's side. He's good for bella, you know". I insisted letting her send the message to her brother. " then its good she has him" she agreed." But still , now and then I could she pain in her eyes." I went on with a hopeless tone. " I don't know, if shes ever gona get over it." But with jake on her side I think, she will move on.

We chatted ..For awhile but my heart isn't feeling right, I'm worried.i did what my instincts told me to do "Alice, I have to ask you something?" I said awkwardly. "Go ahead" she said calmly. "He's not coming back too is he?" there was suppressed anger in my tone. Alice answered softly, in a reassuring tone "he doesn't even know I'm here. The last time I spoke to him he was in south America" "that's something at least" I snorted. Good to know his out her life for good "well, I hope he's enjoying himself" "I wouldn't make assumptions, Charlie" well I'm not making assumptions, I'm positively sure. I swear to lord the next time I saw that kid. I'm gona shoot him down.

It's late, I better get going "Alice could you do me a favor?" "Sure, Charlie" "well, I'm going over to the Clearwater's to help them and I would be there until the funeral ends. So could you please keep bells company and make sure she's safe?" "I'll be glad to do that" I took my coat and was about to leave, well I didn't want wake bells up. I guess I will let Alice do the explanation. "Ah ... before I forget, alice tell bells not to cook today... I will buy for you girls ok?" "Sure thing Charlie".

[After the funeral]

The funeral went well, but I have to say. I felt really bad for the kids, and Harry... its use to be three of us going fishing and watching game. Man... I miss him... and the worst part was he was with me when he… everyone attend the funeral, I saw sam being a big help there and most of the _reservation_ boys weren't that bad. I guess I misjudge them, and thinking about it Jake was missing in the funeral. I guess he was with bells, I don't mind having Jake over at house but Alice is there and if I'm not mistaken. The cullens and Jake don't go along, so far as I seen whenever I mentioned to Jake that Bella was with the cullens, his reactions change. I wouldn't blame him; I myself don't like the other Cullens except for Alice and Carlisle. I picked up pizza on the way, I arrived home quiet late than usual hopefully the girls are waiting, I don't want to have bells cook today.

I parked the car at the usual spot, but as I got out I noticed that the Mercedes was gone. Ok Alice left again without saying good bye? Maybe some urgent work I guess. I opened the door; I noticed the lights were turned off. Bells went to bed early?? I placed the pizza at the kitchen table went to bells room. I knocked "bells?" no reply... ok this is creeping me out "bells, are you ok?" still no reply. No... She wouldn't have? I shook my head at my thought. She wouldn't have run away again. I opened the door and found an empty room. What is this girl thinking? I went down in hurry to call Billy. Maybe Jake knew something about this? Beside the phone there was a note.

_**Dad,**_

**I know this is sudden but I have to go with Alice. This is kinda important** **and I know you are mad at me but please understand just wait till I comeback and then you can scold me as long as you want. And I'm sorry I can't tell you more. Bye dad.**

Oh, she has a lot of nerve to do this again, she is grounded for the rest of the life and I'm very sure this is because of that Edward kid. That kid just brings problem and problems for bells. I got to know what's going now, I dialed Billy's number… it rand twice before he picked up. "Billy... do you where bella is? Is Jacob there? Could I talk to him?" he sounded surprise, I guess Jake didn't tell him or Jake went along with Bella "huh? She's gone? No Jake's not here Charlie... we are looking for him... he's been gona for awhile and hasn't come home yet" wait... he left too? What is up with these kids these days? Something happens and they just ran away. "Have you found him yet?" I asked in concern. "Well no... We haven't found him yet, do you have any clue where they are?" he asked hoping that there's something I could help. "Well, bells left a note says she's gone with Alice" "Alice Cullen?" Billy asked "eem... yeah she visited us just now. You think Jake's with them?" I asked his opinion. " I don't think so Charlie" he said, as I thought, Jake doesn't go along with the cullens. "Well do you want me to send some of my men out to search?" I asked as that's all I can do. "Its ok Charlie, we got it covered here, thanks and if there's any news about Bella I will call you" he said while putting down the phone.

I waited... and waited maybe if bells might call... but atlast I slept. I woke up the next morning around 9.00am. Well, i didn't have the appetite to eat so I went to work. I got out of work early and I stopped by at Billy's. His house was full of _Quileute boys, but I manage to find Billy at the backyard. "Hey... is there any news?" I asked trying to get Billy's attention .he flinched, I guess I kinda surprised him "oh hey...ermm... no..." he said with a really sad tone, his face was depressing. I know how it feels to have your kids run away without saying anything. I feel bad for him at least I know bells with Alice but he … "we can't find him... the boys have searched the whole ground from last night till now... but still no sign." I petted Billy's shoulder "doesn't worry, Jake can take care of himself. Have some faith on the kid." "No... It's not that Charlie, he has never run away from home before and nothing happened between us and also the boys. I'm just scared that…" "Stop talking nonsense… the kid is fine... I'm sure he will comeback soon." I said reassuring Billy. "I hope so" Billy said sadly. "Hey ... I gotta go, I'll call you if I get any clue" billy just noded in reply._

_I arrived home; it was quite since bells not around not that it was noisy when she was here. It's just the house felt full of light when she was here, now its looks so lifeless... then I heard the phone ring. Bells...that's all what on mind. I rushed to get the phone "hello. Bells?" "No Charlie, its me Billy" I got disappointed"oh… what is it" "the boys found Jake, and I asked him about bells he said he doesn't have any clue." So... bells just left with Alice, now I'm worried. Who's protecting her? I thought Jake was with her so I felt kind of secure of Bella's safety. "Where was he and is he hurt?" "In the forest, no he is fine but I'm worried of him… his behavior is kinda strange" "strange? as in?" his not the old Jake and Charlie if you talk to him don't mention anything about this" "ok ... take care of him billy" "I will" with that billy and I hung up. I started thinking of bells and soon I was drifted to sleep._

_I woke up next morning, and I decided not to go to work today. I wanted pay a visit to Billy and maybe talk to Jake. If he knows something about bells. I went out and I started my car engine and as I reversing the car, I saw a familiar car. It was a grey Volvo. Wait... isn't that … I puuled over the car, and stpped out. I was standing in front of my house. And there comes my daughter and Edward right behind her as the car stoppes. As soon as she's near. I shouted at her while sending flying daggers towards Edward."_ Where have you been bells" "Dad, I can explain" she said trying to calm me down. Oh it ain't gona happen. Twice bells! Twice! You left me me twice! . "Oh you better have an explanation young lady, cause you're in a lot of trouble" I said, I saw her fidgeting her hands. But my attention was more on the boy. How dare he show himself in front of me again after all he did to bells? "Sir, I can explain... it's not Bella's fault" he said, I was about to argue with him but then Bella fainted. Before she touched the ground, Edward caught her.

He brought her to her room, and laid her there." We need to talk I said to him" while keeping my seriousness "yes sir..." we both have taken our seats in the living room. " what have done to her?" I asked him while keeping my eye contact with him. "Sir... it's nothing... I guess she got tired traveling that's all" that all?! After taking my daughter away from me for 3 days, he just says she got tired of traveling that's all! His getting on my nerves. "Where have you taken her?" I asked him... no reply was made. "I'm asking again ... where have you taken her?" well if he isn't going to answer than theres no raeson for him to say. I got up and ordered him "get up" "but sir…" "No buts... get out of my house nowand I don't want to see in my house again and don't even think about seeing her again. If I caught here again or with bells, I won't hesitate to shoot you down. Understand?" he shook his head and said "yes sir".

I saw him getting out of house territory, well that when well... I got up and checked on bells. I decided to cook something for bells and I did pasta for her. I am still angry at her but she's my daughter, I can't be that angry with her. But one thing is for sure, she is grounded until she gains my trust back and I'm very sure that's gona been long. I watched game on TV and I sensed my eye lids get heavier. I guess a short nap won't harm.

(After 4 hours)

I woke up when I heard someone knocking the door. Guess that Edward boy is a stubborn one, I took my gun out of my jacket went to get the door. I was surprise to find Jacob black in front of my door. Guess he knows bells came back. Oh hey Jake, come in. I will wake up bells for you, she is sleeping now" now that's someone that I would like to see more often. "No... No... Its ok…" he said reassuring me. Ok.. If he doesn't want to see bells then... why is he here? I asked him. "Oh so, is there an other reason for you to be here?" I heard him say, in a low and intense voice "Well, yes sir. You see I'm going to visit my relation in the south and well it might be awhile for me to be back. So I wanted to give bells her present for her next birthday in advance." Well that's a surprise; Billy never mentioned that he has relation in the south. Her birthday present in advance? How long is he planning on staying there? I don't wanna sound rude so I said. "Oh, well I'm sure bells would be happy to have it, south you say? Well can't you delay your trip a bit there has been some bear sighting here and its dangerous for you move around and is Billy going with you?" tone "Yes south sir, no I'm afraid if I don't go now. I might disappoint them since they are expecting me soon. Don't worry; I'm sure this old Jake can take care of himself and just me. Dad's gona stay behind but he will catch up later" this doesn't sound right. Billy would never let Jake go anywhere this far alone. I guess I will call him to check this up. "Ok, you be sure to take care of yourself ok? If anything happens to you bells would be broken you know?" I said trying to get him stay. "Uh not wanting to be rude or anything but where's the gift boy?" "Oh yeah, sorry I forgot." Then I saw him running towards the side of my house. What the heck is this boy doing? Then I saw him bringing a bike with him. Nice bike, but where did he get the money to buy that from? "So where is it?" I asked him about the gift.

. "Well this is it" he said while patting the bike "waits what! You bought her a bike? Jacob black! What did you get the money from to buy her this? did ya rob a bank or something?" now that's all of money.. So far I know Jake doesn't work anywhere? Where did he get the money from? "No ...no... I bought from the parts from the dumpster and the rest I got for half price from a friend" he said, well that's nice of him. He really cares for bells but I don't think Bella needs a bike and besides the bike might actually be useful to him rather than her. "Oh ... but seriously you shouldn't have. Besides she doesn't even know how to ride a bike." I said trying to get him take back the bike "No... No you must accept it. It's my gift to Bella and I'm sure you can teach her." he insisted so well... I just agreed "Well I better get going... see you" Jake said while he turned to leave "ooh so soon... well ok then. Do you want to leave a message for bells?" he could at least wait to tell bells that he is leaving... I'm sure she would be sad if she know that he left her without her knowledge " uhmm.. No sir... but… I guess you could help me. Could you pass this note to bells?" a note? Now this is interesting "Yeah ... sure Jake... take care ok...you are not only Billy's son mine as well ok" he just smiled in reply.

I closed the door and tried to TV but it just doesn't feel right. Jake is leaving and I think bells should know now rather than later. So I went upstairs and opened her room door. I saw an empty bed and an opened window. This girl doesn't learn does she? I got really angry now more than I was just now. That's it... she is grounded for her entire life. I know very well where she is gone; I got my jacket and went straight to my car. I try to get the car keys but then Jake's note fell down from my pocket. I got into the car and started the engine while waiting for the engine to get ready. I took out Jake note and read it.

**Bells... **

**By the time, you read this. I might not be around here anymore. I want you to know that I love you, with all my heart. And I perfectly respect your choice, you chose him over me and I understand that you don't have the same feelings that I have for you. So by me being me here much longer will just make your relationship with him even more complicated. So I'm going away from here, I have some things to handle on my own and I hope you will be happy with him. I promised you bells, I promised you that I won't hurt you and I'm going keep my promise. I won't forget anything that has happened between us all these while. Bye bell**s.

What in the name of god, is going on with these two kids? They keep running away as if it's the only solution for their problems. Bells chose Edward?! And the last sentence was totally wrong. I feel bad for Jake. Wait I need to tell Billy. And Bella is in for a lot trouble.


	9. Chapter 9 icy cold

**Disclaimer: no, I don't own twilight**

**All hail Jacob!** **Team Jacob all the way...**

**ATTENTION! you could actually skip this chapter if you have read new moon except for the last part the one "the next morning" 's something you should read to stay in track with the plot**

"Okay," he sighed. "I'll give you a ride." I shrugged. "Either way. But you probably should be there, too." "And why is that?" "Because you're extraordinarily opinionated, and I'm sure you'll want a chance to air your views." "My views on which subject?" He asked through his teeth. "This isn't just about you anymore. You're not the center of the universe, you know." My own personal universe was, of course, a different story. "If you're going to bring the Volturi down on us over something as stupid as leaving me human, then your family ought to have a say." "A say in what?" he asked, each word distinct.

"My mortality. I'm putting it to a vote."

He was not pleased, that much was easy to read in his face. But, without further argument, he took me in his arms and sprang lithely from my window, landing without the slightest jolt, like a cat. It was a little bit farther down than I'd imagined."All right then," he said, his voice seething with disapproval. "Up you go."He helped me onto his back, and took off running. Even after all this time, it felt . Evidently this was something you never forgot, like riding a bicycle.

It was so very quiet and dark as he ran through the forest, his breathing slow and even –dark enough that the trees flying past us were nearly invisible, and only the rush of air in my face truly gave away our speed. The air was damp; it didn't burn my eyes the way the wind in the big plaza had, and that was was the night, too, after that terrifying the thick quilt I'd played under as a child, the dark felt familiar and protecting.I remembered that running through the forest like this used to frighten me, that I used to have to close my eyes. It seemed a silly reaction to me now. I kept my eyes wide, my chin resting on his shoulder, my cheek against his neck. The speed was exhilarating. A hundred times better than the motorcycle.I turned my face toward him and pressed my lips into the cold stone skin of his neck.

"Thank you," he said, as the vague, black shapes of trees raced past us. "Does that mean you've decided you're awake?"I laughed. The sound was easy, natural, effortless. It sounded right. "Not really. More that, either way, I'm not trying to wake up. Not tonight.""I'll earn your trust back somehow," he murmured, mostly to himself. "If it's my final act.""I trust you," I assured him. "It's me I don't trust.""Explain that, please."He'd slowed to a walk – I could only tell because the wind ceased – and I guessed that we weren't far from the house. In fact, I thought I could make out the sound of the river rushing somewhere close by in the darkness.

"Well –" I struggled to find the right way to phrase it. "I don't trust myself to be…enough. To deserve you. There's nothing about me that could hold you."He stopped and reached around to pull me from his back. His gentle hands did not release me; after he'd set me on my feet again, he wrapped his arms tightly around me, hugging me to his chest."Your hold is permanent and unbreakable," he whispered. "Never doubt that."But how could I not?"You never did tell me…" he murmured."What?""What your greatest problem is.""I'll give you one guess." I sighed, and reached up to touch the tip of his nose with my index nodded. "I'm worse than the Volturi," he said grimly. "I guess I've earned that."I rolled my eyes. "The worst the Volturi can do is kill me."He waited with tense eyes."You can leave me," I explained. "The Volturi, Victoria…they're nothing compared to that."Even in the darkness, I could see the anguish twist his face – it reminded me of his expression under Jane's torturing gaze; I felt sick, and regretted speaking the truth.

"Don't," I whispered, touching his face. "Don't be sad."He pulled one corner of his mouth up halfheartedly, but the expression didn't touch his eyes."If there was only some way to make you see that I can't leave you," he whispered. "Time, I suppose, will be the way to convince you."I liked the idea of time. "Okay," I face was still tormented. I tried to distract him with inconsequentials."So – since you're staying. Can I have my stuff back?" I asked, making my tone as light as I could attempt worked, to an extent: he laughed. But his eyes retained the misery. "Your things were never gone," he told me. "I knew it was wrong, since I promised you peace without reminders. It was stupid and childish, but I wanted to leave something of myself with you. The CD, the pictures, the tickets – they're all under your floorboards."

"Really?"He nodded, seeming slightly cheered by my obvious pleasure in this trivial fact. It wasn't enough to heal the pain in his face completely."I think," I said slowly, "I'm not sure, but I wonder… I think maybe I knew it the whole time.""What did you know?"I only wanted to take away the agony in his eyes, but as I spoke the words, they sounded truer than I expected they would."Some part of me, my subconscious maybe, never stopped believing that you still cared whether I lived or died. That's probably why I was hearing the voices."There was a very deep silence for a moment. "Voices?" he asked flatly."Well, just one voice. Yours. It's a long story." The wary look on his face made me wish that I hadn't brought that up. Would he think I was crazy, like everyone else? Was everyone else right about that? But at least that expression – the one that made him look like something was burning him – faded."I've got time." His voice was unnaturally even."It's pretty pathetic."He waited.

I wasn't sure how to explain. "Do you remember what Alice said about extreme sports?"He spoke the words without inflection or emphasis. "You jumped off a cliff for fun.""Er, right. And before that, with the motorcycle –""Motorcycle?" he asked. I knew his voice well enough to hear something brewing behind the calm."I guess I didn't tell Alice about that part.""No.""Well, about that…See, I found that…when I was doing something dangerous or stupid… I could remember you more clearly," I confessed, feeling completely mental. "I could remember how your voice sounded when you were angry. I could hear it, like you were standing right there next to me. Mostly I tried not to think about you, but this didn't hurt so much – it was like you were protecting me again. Like you didn't want me to be hurt."And, well, I wonder if the reason I could hear you so clearly was because, underneath it all. I always knew that you hadn't stopped loving me."Again, as I spoke, the words brought with them a sense of conviction. Of rightness. Some deep place inside me recognized truth.

His words came out half-strangled. "You…were… risking your life…to hear –""Shh," I interrupted him. "Hold on a second. I think I'm having an epiphany here."I thought of that night in Port Angeles when I'd had my first delusion. I'd come up with two options. Insanity or wish fulfillment. I'd seen no third what if…What if you sincerely believed something was true, but you were dead wrong? What if you were so stubbornly sure that you were right, that you wouldn't even consider the truth? Would the truth be silenced, or would it try to break through?Option three: Edward loved me. The bond forged between us was not one that could be broken by absence, distance, or time. And no matter how much more special or beautiful or brilliant or perfect than me he might be, he was as irreversibly altered as I was. As I would always belong to him, so would he always be mine.

Was that what I'd been trying to tell myself?"Oh!""Bella?""Oh. Okay. I see.""Your epiphany?" he asked, his voice uneven and strained."You love me," I marveled. The sense of conviction and rightness washed through me his eyes were still anxious, the crooked smile I loved best flashed across his face."Truly, I do."My heart inflated like it was going to crack right through my ribs. It filled my chest and blocked my throat so that I could not really did want me the way I wanted him – forever. It was only fear for my soul, for the human things he didn't want to take from me, that made him so desperate to leave me mortal. Compared to the fear that he didn't want me, this hurdle – my soul – He took my face tightly between his cool hands and kissed me until I was so dizzy the forest was spinning. Then he leaned his forehead against mine, and I was not the only one breathing harder than usual."You were better at it than I was, you know," he told me."Better at what?""Surviving. You, at least, made an effort. You got up in the morning, tried to be normal for Charlie, followed the pattern of your life. When I wasn't actively tracking, I was…totally useless. I couldn't be around my family – I couldn't be around anyone. I'm embarrassed to admit that I more or less curled up into a ball and let the misery have me." He grinned, sheepish. "It was much more pathetic than hearing voices. And, of course, you know I do that, too."

I was deeply relieved that he really seemed to understand – comforted that this all made sense to him. At any rate, he wasn't looking at me like I was crazy. He was looking at me like…he loved me."I only heard one voice," I corrected laughed and then pulled me tight against his right side and started to lead me forward."I'm just humoring you with this." He motioned broadly with his hand toward the darkness in front of us as we walked. There was something pale and immense there – the house, I realized."It doesn't matter in the slightest what they say.""This affects them now, too."He shrugged led me through the open front door into the dark house and flipped the lights on. The room was just as I'd remembered it – the piano and the white couches and the pale, massive staircase. No dust, no white called out the names with no more volume than I'd use in regular conversation."Carlisle? Esme? Rosalie? Emmett? Jasper? Alice?" They would was suddenly standing beside me, as if he'd been there all along. "Welcome back, Bella." He smiled. "What can we do for you this morning? I imagine, due to the hour, that this is not a purely social visit?"

I nodded. "I'd like to talk to everyone at once, if that's okay. About something important."I couldn't help glancing up at Edward's face as I spoke. His expression was critical, but resigned. When I looked back to Carlisle, he was looking at Edward, too."Of course," Carlisle said. "Why don't we talk in the other room?"Carlisle led the way through the bright living room, around the corner to the dining room, turning on lights as he went. The walls were white, the ceilings high, like the living room. In the center of the room, under the low-hanging chandelier, was a large, polished oval table surrounded by eight chairs. Carlisle held out a chair for me at the head.I'd never seen the Cullens use the dining room table before – it was just a prop. They didn't eat in the soon as I turned to sit in the chair, I saw that we were not alone. Esme had followed Edward, and behind her the rest of the family filed sat down on my right, and Edward on my left. Everyone else took their seats in silence. Alice was grinning at me, already in on the plot. Emmett and Jasper looked curious, and Rosalie smiled at me tentatively. My answering smile was just as timid. That was going to take some getting used nodded toward me. "The floor is yours."

I swallowed. Their gazing eyes made me nervous. Edward took my hand under the at him, but he was watching the others, his face suddenly fierce."Well," I paused. "I'm hoping Alice has already told you everything that happened in Volterra?""Everything," Alice assured me.I threw her a meaningful look. "And on the way?""That, too," she nodded."Good," I sighed with relief. "Then we're all on the same page."They waited patiently while I tried to order my thoughts."So, I have a problem," I began. "Alice promised the Volturi that I would become one of you. They're going to send someone to check, and I'm sure that's a bad thing – something to avoid."Definitely," Jasper was the one to say what everyone was thinking."And so, now, this involves you all. I'm sorry about that."I looked at each one of their beautiful faces, saving the most beautiful for last. Edward's mouth was turned down into a grimace. "But, if you don't want me, then I'm not going to force myself on you, whether Alice is willing or not."Esme opened her mouth to speak, but I held up one finger to stop her."Please, let me finish. You all know what I want. And I'm sure you know what Edward thinks, too. I think the only fair way to decide is for everyone to have a vote. If you decide you don't want me, then…I guess I'll go back to Italy alone. I can't have them coming here."

My forehead creased as I considered was the faint rumble of a growl in Edward's chest. I ignored him."Taking into account, then, that I won't put any of you in danger either way, I want you to vote yes or no on the issue of me becoming a vampire."I half-smiled on the last word, and gestured toward Carlisle to begin."Just a minute," Edward interrupted.I glared at him through narrowed eyes. He raised his eyebrows at me, squeezing my hand."I have something to add before we vote."I sighed."About the danger Bella's referring to," he continued. "I don't think we need to be overly anxious."His expression became more animated. He put his free hand on the shining table and leaned forward."You see," he explained, looking around the table while he spoke, "there was more than one reason why I didn't want to shake Aro's hand there at the end. There's something they didn't think of, and I didn't want to clue them in." He grinned.

"Which was?" Alice prodded. I was sure my expression was just as skeptical as hers."The Volturi are overconfident, and with good reason. When they decide to find someone, it's not really a problem. Do you remember Demetri?" He glanced down at me.I shuddered. He took that as a yes."He finds people – that's his talent, why they keep him."Now, the whole time we were with any of them, I was picking their brains for anything that might save us, getting as much information as possible. So I saw how Demetri's talent works. He's a tracker – a tracker a thousand times more gifted than James was. His ability is loosely related to what I do, or what Aro does. He catches the…flavor? I don't know how to describe it…the tenor…of someone's mind, and then he follows that. It works over immense distances."But after Aro's little experiments, well…" Edward shrugged."You think he won't be able to find me," I said was smug. "I'm sure of it. He relies totally on that other sense. When it doesn't work with you, they'll all be blind.""And how does that solve anything?""Quite obviously, Alice will be able to tell when they're planning a visit, and I'll hide 'll be helpless," he said with fierce enjoyment. "It will be like looking for a piece of straw in a haystack!"

He and Emmett exchanged a glance and a made no sense. "But they can find you," I reminded him."And I can take care of myself."Emmett laughed, and reached across the table toward his brother, extending a fist."Excellent plan, my brother," he said with stretched out his arm to smack Emmett's fist with his own."No," Rosalie hissed."Absolutely not," I agreed."Nice." Jasper's voice was appreciative."Idiots," Alice just glared at Edward.I straightened up in my chair, focusing. This was my meeting."All right, then. Edward has offered an alternative for you to consider," I said coolly. "Let's vote."I looked toward Edward this time; it would be better to get his opinion out of the way. "Do you want me to join your family?"His eyes were hard and black as flint. "Not that way. You're staying human."I nodded once, keeping my face businesslike, and then moved on."Alice?""Yes.""Jasper?""Yes," he said, voice grave. I was a little surprised – I hadn't been at all sure of his vote –but I suppressed my reaction and moved on."Rosalie?"She hesitated, biting down on her full, perfect bottom lip. "No."I kept my face blank and turned my head slightly to move on, but she held up both her hands, palms forward."Let me explain," she pleaded. "I don't mean that I have any aversion to you as a sister. It's just that…this is not the life I would have chosen for myself. I wish there had been someone there to vote no for me."

I nodded slowly, and then turned to Emmett."Hell, yes!" He grinned. "We can find some other way to pick a fight with this Demetri."I was still grimacing at that when I looked at Esme."Yes, of course, Bella. I already think of you as part of my family.""Thank you, Esme," I murmured as I turned toward Carlisle.I was suddenly nervous, wishing I had asked for his vote first. I was sure that this was the vote that mattered most, the vote that counted more than any wasn't looking at me."Edward," he said."No," Edward growled. His jaw was strained tight, his lips curled back from his teeth."It's the only way that makes sense," Carlisle insisted. "You've chosen not to live without her, and that doesn't leave me a choice."Edward dropped my hand, shoving away from the table. He stalked out of the room, snarling under his breath."I guess you know my vote." Carlisle sighed.I was still staring after Edward. "Thanks," I earsplitting crash echoed from the other room.I flinched, and spoke quickly. "That's all I needed. Thank you. For wanting to keep me. I feel exactly the same way about all of you, too." My voice was jagged with emotion by the was at my side in a flash, her cold arms around me."Dearest Bella," she breathed.I hugged her back. Out of the corner of my eye, I noticed Rosalie looking down at the table, and I realized that my words could be construed in two ways.

"Well, Alice," I said when Esme released me. "Where do you want to do this?"Alice stared at me, her eyes widening with terror."No! No! NO!" Edward roared, charging back into the room. He was in my face before I had time to blink, bending over me, his expression twisted in rage. "Are you insane?" he shouted."Have you utterly lost your mind?"I cringed away, my hands over my ears."Um, Bella," Alice interjected in an anxious voice. "I don't think I'm ready for that. I'll need to prepare…""You promised," I reminded her, glaring under Edward's arm."I know, but…Seriously, Bella! I don't have any idea how to not kill you.""You can do it," I encouraged. "I trust you."Edward snarled in shook her head quickly, looking panicked."Carlisle?" I turned to look at grabbed my face in his hand, forcing me to look at him. His other hand was out, palm toward ignored that. "I'm able to do it," he answered my question. I wished I could see his expression. "You would be in no danger of me losing control.""Sounds good." I hoped he could understand; it was hard to talk clearly the way Edward held my jaw."Hold on," Edward said between his teeth. "It doesn't have to be now.""There's no reason for it not to be now," I said, the words coming out distorted."I can think of a few.""Of course you can," I said sourly. "Now let go of me."He freed my face, and folded his arms across his chest. "In about two hours, Charlie will be here looking for you. I wouldn't put it past him to involve the police.""All three of them." But I was always the hardest part. Charlie, Renee. Now Jacob, too. The people I would lose, the people I would hurt. I wished there was some way that I could be the only one to suffer, but I knew that was impossible.

At the same time, I was hurting them more by staying human. Putting Charlie in constant danger through my proximity. Putting Jake in worse danger still by drawing his enemies across the land he felt bound to protect. And Renee – I couldn't even risk a visit to see my own mother for fear of bringing my deadly problems along with me!I was a danger magnet; I'd accepted that about this, I knew I needed to be able to take care of myself and protect the ones I loved, even if that meant that I couldn't be with them. I needed to be strong."In the interest of remaining inconspicuous," Edward said, still talking through his gritted teeth, but looking at Carlisle now, "I suggest that we put this conversation off, at the very least until Bella finishes high school, and moves out of Charlie's house.""That's a reasonable request, Bella," Carlisle pointed out.I thought about Charlie's reaction when he woke up this morning, if – after all that life had put him through in the last week with Harry's loss, and then I had put him through with my unexplained disappearance – he were to find my bed empty. Charlie deserved better than was just a little more time; graduation wasn't so far away…I pursed my lips. "I'll consider it."Edward relaxed. His jaw unclenched."I should probably take you home," he said, more calm now, but clearly in a hurry to get me out of here. "Just in case Charlie wakes up early."I looked at Carlisle. "After graduation?""You have my word."I took a deep breath, smiled, and turned back to Edward. "Okay. You can take me home."

Edward rushed me out of the house before Carlisle could promise me anything else. He laid me on and kissed me good bye. " edward…" I called out for him. " yes, ?" " I love you" " I love you too, go to sleep now. I will see you in the morning" with that he left.

[ the next morning]

I heard knocking on my door, the door cracked open."Morning, Dad." "Oh, hey, Bella, I didn't know you were awake." "Yeah. I've just been waiting for you to wake up so I could take a shower." I started to get up. "Hold on," Charlie said, flipping the light on. I blinked in the sudden brightness, and carefully kept my eyes away from the closet. "Let's talk for a minute first."I couldn't control my grimace. I'd forgotten to ask Alice for a good excuse."You know you're in trouble." "Yeah, I know."

"I went crazy these last three days. I come home from Harry's funeral, and you're gone. Jacob could only tell me that you'd run off with Alice Cullen, and that he thought you were in trouble. You didn't leave me a number! you didn't even call. I had no idea where you were and god's know how long were you went missing. Do you know, how any of us reacted on your departure? Do you have any idea how… how…" He couldn't finish the sentence.

He sucked in a sharp breath and moved on. "Can you give me one good reason why I shouldn't ship you off to Jacksonville this very second?"Us? Who was he refering to?My eyes narrowed. So he's going to use the threat card now eh? Two could play that game. I sat up, pulling the quilt around me. "Because I won't go." "Now just one minute, young lady –" "Look, Dad. I accept complete responsibility for my actions, and you have the right to ground me for as long as you want. I will also do all the chores ,laundry and dishes until you think I've learned my lesson. And I guess you're within your rights if you want to kick me out, too – but that won't make me to go to Florida."

His face turned bright red. He took a few deep breaths, he gave the there-is-no-point-in-talking-about-it look before he asked. "Would you like to explain where you've been?" Oh, crap. "There was… an emergency."He raised his eyebrows in expectation of my brilliant explanation.I filled my cheeks with air and then blew it out noisily.

"I don't know what to tell you, it was mostly a misunderstanding. He said, she it got out of hand."It was actually the waited with a distrustful expression. "See, Alice told Rosalie about me jumping off the cliff…"I was scrambling frantically to make this work, to keep it as close to the truth as possible so that my inability to lie convincingly would not undermine the excuse, but before I could go on, Charlie's expression reminded me that he didn't know anything about the oops. As if I wasn't already toast.

"I guess I didn't tell you about that," I choked out. "It was nothing. Just messing around, swimming with Jake. Anyway, Rosalie told Edward, and he was upset. She sort of accidentally made it sound like I was trying to kill myself or something. He wouldn't answer his phone, so Alice dragged me to… L.A., to explain in person." I shrugged, desperately hoping that he would not be so distracted by my slip that he'd miss the brilliant explanation I'd provided.

Charlie's face was frozen. "Were you trying to kill yourself, Bella?" "No, of course not. Just having fun with Jake. Cliff diving. The La Push kids do it all the time. Like I said, nothing."

Charlie's face heated up – from frozen to hot with fury. " you expect me believe that Jacob have you cliff diving jus for fun?" "What's it to Edward Cullen anyway?" he barked. "All this time, he's just left you dangling without a word –"I interrupted him. "Another misunderstanding."His face flushed again. "So is he back then?" "I'm not sure what the exact plan is. I think they all are."He shook his head, the vein in his forehead pulsing. "I want you to stay away from him, Bella. I don't trust him. He's rotten for you. I won't let him mess you up like that again."

"Fine," I said rocked back onto his heels. "Oh." He scrambled for a second, exhaling loudly in surprise. "I thought you were going to be difficult." "I am." I stared straight into his eyes. "I meant, 'Fine, I'll move out.'"His eyes bulged; his face turned puce. My resolve wavered as I started to worry about his health. He was no younger than Harry…"Dad, I don't want to move out," I said in a softer tone. "I love you. I know you're worried, but you need to trust me on this. And you're going to have to ease up on Edward if you want me to stay. Do you want me to live here or not?" "That's not fair, Bella. You know I want you to stay."

Before I could argue to him, charlie's phone rang, "these guys.." charlie muttered. Well I guess that call was from his work place. " this talk isn't over yet, when I get back. We are gona finish this talk" with that he left. . I heard him stomp furiously down the now that's out of the way, I better get dressed since Edward would be here any moment. The morning went usual. Edward came over, around noon and we went out for awhile around forks. On our way home we had a small talk. .

"Don't start anything with Charlie over me, please. " he murmured. "Don't worry about it," I said calmly. "If Charlie kicks me out, then there's no need for a graduation deadline, is there?" His jaw tightened. "So eager for eternal damnation," he muttered. "You know you don't really believe that." "Oh, don't I?" he fumed. ."No. You don't." He glowered at me and started to speak, but I cut him off."If you really believed that you'd lost your soul, then when I found you in Volterra, you would have realized immediately what was happening, instead of thinking we were both dead together. But you didn't – you said 'Amazing. Carlisle was right,'" I reminded him, triumphant. "There's hope in you, after all."For once, Edward was speechless."So let's both just be hopeful, all right?" I suggested. "Not that it matters. If you stay, I don't need heaven."He got up slowly, and came to put his hands on either side of my face as he stared into my eyes. "Forever," he vowed, still a little staggered."That's all I'm asking for," I said, and stretched up on my toes so that I could press my lips to his.


	10. Chapter 10 romeo vs paris

**Disclaimer: no, I don't own twilight and yes I hate Edward...**

**All hail Jacob!** **Team Jacob all the way...**

**thanks for reading so far, please do review if you have time. the ones italic are from the book.**

_"Don't start anything with Charlie over me, please." he murmured. "Don't worry about it," I said calmly. "If Charlie kicks me out, then there's no need for a graduation deadline, is there?" His jaw tightened. "So eager for eternal damnation," he muttered. "You know you don't really believe that." "Oh, don't I?" he fumed. ."No. You don't." He glowered at me and started to speak, but I cut him off." If you really believed that you'd lost your soul, then when I found you in Volterra, you would have realized immediately what was happening, instead of thinking we were both dead together. But you didn't – you said 'Amazing. Carlisle was right,'" I reminded him, triumphant. "There's hope in you, after all." For once, Edward was speechless." So let's both just be hopeful, all right?" I suggested. "Not that it matters. If you stay, I don't need heaven." He got up slowly, and came to put his hands on either side of my face as he stared into my eyes. "Forever," he vowed, still a little staggered." That's all I'm asking for," I said, and stretched up on my toes so that I could press my lips to his._

Now we were on our way back to my house before Charlie comes home, usually he would be late if he gets call from work. I tried to remember back everything that had happened, in this few days ago. I flew back from Italy after meeting a bunch of vampires, and I got grounded. I am also banned from seeing Edward again other than that almost everything is back to normal – the good, pre-zombie normal – in less time than I would have believed possible.

The hospital welcomed Carlisle back with eager arms, not even bothering to conceal their delight that Esme had found life in L.A. so little to her liking. Thanks to the Calculus test I'd missed while abroad, Alice and Edward were in better to shape to graduate than I was at the moment. Suddenly, college was a priority (college was still plan B, on the off chance that Edward's offer swayed me from the post-graduation Carlisle option).

Edward had already done the Harvard route, so it didn't bother him that, thanks to my procrastination, we might both end up at Peninsula Community College next year. With Edward back in place, it was almost as if the last eight months were just a disturbing nightmare.

Almost, but not quite. There was the house arrest situation, for one thing. And for another, Jacob black. I don't know why but I seemed to miss him more.

Yes we did sleep together but it's wasn't what i thought it would mean. I mean i did feel like, I was bonded with him some how but that's just because he was my first and nothing more. I want to believe that it was a mistake, I wasn't sure.. I thought he was the one but he is not. Edward is. Edward is my soulmate, but.. eventhough i want to believe that Jacob is not for me i just couldn't. And i don't know why,I couldn't stop thinking about him but he's fine i mean.

He was ok that the other day when i left with Alice.I wasn't at liberty to go to La Push, and Jacob wasn't coming to see me. He wouldn't even answer my phone calls.I made these calls yesterday and today morning, after Edward had been kicked out .I chose that time to make my fruitless calls because I'd noticed that Edward made a certain face every time I mentioned Jacob's name. Sort of disapproving and wary… maybe even angry.

I guessed that he had some reciprocal prejudice against the werewolves, though he wasn't as vocal as Jacob had been about the "bloodsuckers." And I am still finding the right time to tell Edward about me losing my virginity to Jacob. But I'm scared that he might leave again if I mention it. So, I didn't mention Jacob much.

With Edward near me, it was hard to think about unhappy things – even my former best friend, who was probably very unhappy right now, due to me. When I did think of Jake, I always felt guilty for not thinking of him more since all we have been through even the... mistake.

The fairy tale was back on. Prince returned, bad spell broken. I wasn't sure exactly what to do about the leftover, unresolved character. Where was his happily ever after? After thinking a lot about Jacob and fruitless calls, I vented one "It's just plain rude!" I already told him what happened between me and Jacob was a big mistake and mistakes are meant to forgive and forget.

Being angry about things was easier than feeling guilty. "Down right insulting!" Like a dripping faucet in the back of my head that I couldn't shut off or ignore. Drip, drip, drip. Jacob, Jacob, Jacob. Today morning when I called Jake but Billy picked the phone up. He said that Jake doesn't want to talk to me. Usually, before my trip to Italy, Billy just says he's out or busy or sleeping or something. I mean, it's not like I didn't know he was lying to me, but at least it was a polite way to handle it.

"I guess Billy hates me now, too. It's not fair!"" I bluttered out.

" It's not you, Bella," Edward said quietly.

"Nobody hates you."

"Feels that way," I muttered, folding my arms across my chest.

It was no more than a stubborn gesture. There was no hole there now – I could barely remember the empty feeling anymore.

" Jacob knows we're back, and I'm sure that he's ascertained that I'm with you," Edward said.

"He won't come anywhere near me. The enimity is rooted too deeply." That's stupid.

He knows you're not…like other vampires." There's still good reason to keep a safe distance." I glared blindly out the windshield, seeing only Jacob's face, set in the bitter mask I hated.

" Bella, we are what we are," Edward said quietly.

"I can control myself, but I doubt he can. He's very young. It would most likely turn into a fight, and I don't know if I could stop it before I k –"he broke off, and then quickly continued.

"Before I hurt him. You would be unhappy. I don't want that to happen." I remembered what Jacob had said in the kitchen, hearing the words with perfect recall in his husky voice. I'm not sure that I'm even-tempered enough to handle that…You probably wouldn't like it so much if I killed your friend. But he'd been able to handle it, that time…

"Edward Cullen," I whispered. "Were you about to say 'killed him? Were you?" He looked away from me, staring into the rain. In front of us, the red light I hadn't noticed turned green and he started forward again, driving very slowly. Not his usual way of driving.

" I would try…very hard…not to do that," Edward finally said.

I stared at him with my mouth hanging open, but he continued to look straight ahead. We were paused at the corner stop sign. Abruptly, I remembered what had happened to Paris when Romeo came back. The stage directions were simple:

They fight. Paris falls. But that was ridiculous. Impossible

"Well," I said, and took a deep breath, shaking my head to dispel the words in my head.

"Nothing like that is ever going to happen, so there's no reason to worry about it. And you know Charlie will be arriving any time now... You'd better get me home before I get in more trouble for sneaking out of the house." I turned my face up toward him, to smile half heartedly.

Every time I looked at his face, that impossibly perfect face, my heart pounded strong and healthy and very there in my chest. This time, the pounding raced ahead of its usual besotted pace. I recognized the expression on his statue-still face.

" You're already in more trouble, Bella," he whispered through unmoving lips.

I slid closer, clutching his arm as I followed his gaze to see what he was seeing. I don't know what I expected – maybe Victoria standing in the middle of the street, her flaming red hair blowing in the wind, or a line of tall black cloaks…or a pack of angry werewolves. But I didn't see anything at all." What? What is it?" He took a deep breath.

"Charlie…" "My dad, he's here already?" I screeched. He looked down at me then, and his expression was calm enough to ease some of my panic. "He's gona kill me for sneaking out with you

"Charlie…is probably not going to kill you, but he's thinking about it," he told me.

He started to drive forward again, down my street, but he passed the house and parked by the edge of the trees. Edward glanced back at Charlie's house. I followed his gaze, and noticed for the first time what was parked in the driveway next to the cruiser. Shiny, bright red, impossible to miss. My motorcycle, flaunting itself in the driveway.

Edward had said that Charlie was ready to kill me, so he must know that – that it was mine. There was only one person who could be behind this treachery.

" No!" I gasped.

"Why? Why would Jacob do this to me?" The sting of betrayal washed through me. I had trusted Jacob implicitly – trusted him with every single secret I had. He was supposed to be my safe harbor – the person I could always rely on. Of course things were strained right now, but I didn't think any of the underlying foundation had changed. I didn't think that was changeable!

What had I done to deserve this? Charlie was going to be so mad – and worse than that, he was going to be hurt and worried. Didn't he have enough to deal with already? Jacob did this just so he could get revenge because I chose Edward over him I would have never imagined that Jake could be so petty and just plain mean. Tears sprang, smarting, into my eyes, but they were not tears of sadness. I had been betrayed. I was suddenly so angry that my head throbbed like it was going to explode.

"Is he still here?" I hissed.

" Yes. I can hear his thoughts around here." Edward told me, nodding toward the slender path that divided the dark fringe of the forest in two. I jumped out of the car, launching myself toward the trees with my hands already balled into fists for the first punch.

Why did Edward have to be so much faster than me? He caught me around the waist before I made the path. " Let me go! I'm going to murder him! Traitor!" I shouted the epithet toward the trees.

" Charlie will hear you," Edward warned me. "And once he gets you inside, he may brick over the doorway."

I glanced back at the house instinctively, and it seemed like the glossy red bike was all I could see. I was seeing red. My head throbbed again.

" Just give me one round with Jacob, and then I'll deal with Charlie." I struggled futilely to break free.

I just wanted to choke him to death. Can't he understand that I don't want him...? I have Edward now. That stopped me cold – took the fight right out of me. My hands went limp. They fight; Paris falls. I was furious, but not that furious." I want to talk with him?" I said sternly

"I don't think that's a good idea" Edward said while he smoothed my hair back from my face.

"Don't worry; he's not here to fight me. He's acting as…spokesperson for the pack."

"Oh."Edward looked at the house again, then tightened his arm around my waist and pulled me toward the woods.

"We should hurry. Charlie's getting impatient."

"No, I want to talk to Jacob" I said while looking in Edward's eyes.

"Very well if that's what you wish" We didn't have to go far; Jacob waited just a short ways up the path.

He lounged against a mossy tree trunk as he waited, his face hard and bitter, exactly the way I knew it would be. He looked at me, and then at Edward.

Jacob's mouth stretched into a humorless sneer, and he shrugged away from the tree. He stood on the balls of his bare feet, leaning slightly forward, with his trembling hands clenched into fists. He looked bigger than the last time I'd seen him. Somehow, impossibly, he was still growing. He would tower over Edward, if they stood next to each other.

But Edward stopped as soon as we saw him, leaving a wide space between us and Jacob. Edward turned his body, shifting me so that I was behind him. I leaned around him to stare at Jacob – to accuse him with my eyes.

I would have thought that seeing his resentful, cynical expression would only make me angrier. Instead, it reminded me of the last time I'd seen him, with tears in his eyes.

My fury weakened, faltered, as I stared at Jacob. It had been so long since I'd seen him, since our **'mistake'** – I hated that our reunion had to be like this.

" Bella," Jacob said as a greeting, nodding once toward me without looking away from Edward.

" Why?" I whispered, trying to hide the sound of the lump in my throat.

"How could you do this to me, Jacob?" asking about the bike. The sneer vanished, but his face stayed hard and rigid.

"It's for the best."

"What is that supposed to mean? Do you want Charlie to strangle me? Or did you want him to have a heart attack, like Harry? No matter how mad you are at me, how could you do this to him?" Jacob winced, and his eyebrows pulled together, but he didn't answer." He didn't want to hurt anyone – he just wanted to get you grounded, so that you wouldn't be allowed to spend time with me," Edward murmured, explaining the thoughts Jacob wouldn't say.

Jacob's eyes sparked with hate as he glowered at Edward again.

"What?" I heard Jacob said in surprise but I beat him to it.

"Aw, Jake!" I groaned.

"I'm already grounded! Why do you think I haven't been down to La Push to kick your butt for avoiding my phone calls?" Jacob's eyes flashed back to me, confused for the first time.

"Bells ... I ...don't ..."

"He thought I wouldn't let you, not Charlie," Edward explained again while cutting Jacob before he finished his sentence.

"Stop that," Jacob snapped. Edward didn't answer.

Jacob shuddered once, and then gritted his teeth as hard as his fists. "Bella wasn't exaggerating about your…abilities," he said through his teeth.

"So you must already know why I'm here."

"Yes," Edward agreed in a soft voice.

"But, before you begin, I need to say something." Jacob waited, clenching and unclenching his hands as he tried to control the shivers rolling down his arms.

" Thank you," Edward said, and his voice throbbed with the depth of his sincerity.

"I will never be able to tell you how grateful I am. I will owe you for the rest of my…existence."

Jacob stared at him blankly, his shudders stilled by surprise. He exchanged a quick glance with me, but my face was just as mystified.

" For keeping Bella alive," Edward clarified his voice rough and fervent.

"When I… didn't." Edward –," I started to say, but he held one hand up, his eyes on Jacob. Understanding washed over Jacob's face before the hard mask returned.

"I didn't do it for your benefit."

"I know. But that doesn't erase the gratitude I feel. I thought you should know. If there's ever anything in my power to do for you…" Jacob raised one black brow. Edward shook his head.

"That's not in my power."

"Whose, then?" Jacob growled. Edward looked down at me.

"Hers. I'm a quick learner, Jacob Black, and I don't make the same mistake twice. I'm here until she orders me away."

I was immersed momentarily in his golden gaze. It wasn't hard to understand what I'd missed in the conversation. The only thing that Jacob would want from Edward would be his absence.

"Never," I whispered, still locked in Edward's eyes. Jacob made a gagging sound. I unwillingly broke free from Edward's gaze to frown at Jacob.

"But bells. you don't.." I cut him before he finished again, I don't want to hear him talk, giving me unnecessary excuses

"Was there something else you needed, Jacob? You wanted me in trouble – mission accomplished. Charlie might just send me to military school. But that won't keep me away from Edward. There's nothing that can do that. What more do you want?" Jacob kept his eyes on Edward

"I just needed to remind your bloodsucking friends of a few key points in the treaty they agreed to. The treaty that is the only thing stopping me from ripping his throat out right this minute."

"We haven't forgotten," Edward said at the same time that I demanded,

"What key points?" Jacob still glowered at Edward, but he answered me. "The treaty is quite specific. If any of them bite a human, the truce is over. Bite, not kill," he emphasized.

Finally, he looked at me. His eyes were cold. It only took me a second to grasp the distinction, and then my face was as cold as his.

" That's none of your business." I snapped at him.

"The hell it –" was all he managed to choke out. I didn't expect my hasty words to bring on such a strong response.

Despite the warning he'd come to give, he must not have known. He must have thought the warning was just a precaution. He hadn't realized – or didn't want to believe – that I had already made my choice.

That I was really intending to become a member of the Cullen family.

My answer sent Jacob into near convulsions. He pressed his fists hard against his temples, closing his eyes tight and curling in on himself as he tried to control the spasms. His face turned sallow green under the russet skin.

"Jake? You okay?" I asked anxiously.

I took a half-step toward him, and then Edward caught me and yanked me back behind his own body.

"Careful! He's not under control," he warned me. But Jacob was already somewhat himself again; only his arms were shaking now. He scowled at Edward with pure hate.

"Ugh. I would never hurt her." Neither Edward or I missed the inflection, or the accusation it contained. A low hiss escaped Edward's lips.

"Let's go," Edward said. I looked back at Jacob, torn. Would I see him again?

" Sorry," he whispered so low that I had to read his lips to understand.

"Bye, Bells."

"You promised," I reminded him desperately.

"Still friends, right?"Jacob shook his head slowly, and the lump in my throat nearly strangled me.

"You know how hard I've tried to keep that promise, but…I can't see how to keep trying. Not now…" He struggled to keep his hard mask in place, but it wavered, and then disappeared.

"Miss you," he mouthed.

One of his hands reached toward me, his fingers outstretched, like he wished they were long enough to cross the distance between us.

"Me, too," I choked out. My hand reached toward his across the wide we were connected, the echo of his pain twisted inside me. His pain, my pain.

"Jake…" I took a step toward him. I wanted to wrap my arms around his waist and erase the expression of misery on his pulled me back again, his arms restraining instead of defending.

"It's okay," I promised him, looking up to read his face with trust in my eyes. He would eyes were unreadable, his face expressionless. Cold.

"No, it's not."

"Let her go," Jacob snarled, furious again.

"She wants to!" He took two long strides forward.A glint of anticipation flashed in his eyes. His chest seemed to swell as it pushed me behind himself, wheeling to face Jacob.

"No! Edward–!"

Jacob clenched his fists reflexively.I did what I think was best, i made my way to be between them. Now I was having Jacob on my left and Edward on my right. I saw Edward getting his stance, fighting stance. Oh god... I don't want them to want over me.

"Guys stop it…"I shouted

"if any of you make another move, you two are gona loose me." I said threatening them. Jacob's furious expression faltered.

"I am sorry about that," he muttered.

"I had to do what I could – I had to try…"Jacob's eyes were, red and with tears. God, I feel bad for making him cry. I heard Jacob said something "bells is this what you want?"

"Yes, Jake... this is it..." with that said, I saw Jacob turned behind and phased.

I was about to say good bye to him but I saw Edward's face. It was gloomy and sad. No wait... don't tell me his leaving again...

"Edward..?" I shook his body while calling him. He remained calm and motionless.

"Edward..?" I called out for him again.

"Bella, I would change you in one condition" oh god was I dreaming. Maybe I was because I felt quite dizzy and my surroundings were a blur but still I tried to put myself together. "What is it? I asked him while trying to cover my happiness and my dizziness...

"Will you marry me?" I heard him asked. Before I could reply, my legs lost its balanced and I felt into a deep black space.

My head felt heavy, like I was having a hang over, my body felt sooo hot like I was in an oven. I tried to open my eyes... but it felt heavy... I tried again and I succeeded. Before I could make sure where I was, I heard Alice say something

"Bella are you ok?" I heard her asking me.

" uuhh .. I guess so... "I answered confusedly.

I thought I was in the woods with Edward and Jake. I scanned the room, ok I was in bed... some ones bed and then I saw the Cullens all of them around me. Before I could ask more I heard, the door being slammed. It was Jake, I saw him rushing to me from the door ignoring Rosalie who was glaring at him because he pushed her while he tried to come to me.

"Bells... honey are you ok? Jake asked while taking one of my hands into his.

Ok... there has got to be an explanation for this. I thought we were in the woods and now here in the Cullens house?

"Jake, why am I here?" I asked him ignoring his question earlier.

"Well... while you were in the woods just now, you kinda fainted" he said while looking me in the eyes.

"How long have I been out?" I asked him, while thinking of Charlie.

"Well a few hours" he said while caressing my cheek.

"4 hours to be exact" I heard some one else said. Both I and Jake turned to see who it was. And it was Carlisle.

"Doctor Fang, her body is feeling warmer than usual." I heard Jake say to Carlisle...Dr fang? When did Jake get along with the cullens?

"Well, I guess that's some of the symptoms…" symptoms? What am I sick?

"What's going on me" I started shouting.

"Calm down bells..." I heard Jake said calm down..?

"You expect me to calm down! How the heck am I here ? I saw Carlisle trying to explain but was interrupted when someone came barging into the room. Now who in the heck could that be?

"Hey Blondie, move.I gotta see bella" wait that sounded like…

"Oh hey bells you're wide awake... how are ya? How's the big guy doing" Embry said with a big grin in his face... wait why is embry here? Big guy? Who? "Shut it embry" I heard Sam scolding embry.

Wait Sam's here too…i turned to look at Jake but his eyes were on embry and then I saw Jake smacked his forehead with his hands. I turned to see what bothered Jake that much... and guess what? I saw the whole wolf pack in front of me in the Cullens house...now I'm sure I'm hallucinating stuff.

I asked Jake ... " Jake why are they here? And am I sick?"

"Well bells...erm... erm..." I saw Jake fidgeting his hands wait why is he nervous? I couldn't wait for his reply so I asked Carlisle.

"Carlisle, what's wrong with me? Am I sick or something "

"well...bella… well based on what I observed so far ... I think you are..." I waited for him to say something... just answer me.

"Go on..." I said...

"Well, I think you are pregnant" my mouth went wide.


	11. Chapter 11 charlie & eddie

**Disclaimer: no, I don't own twilight and yes I hate Edward...**

**All hail Jacob!!** **Team Jacob all the way...**

**This chapter is dedicated to jacobfan216, connect2tjb,luvinJ,kiara-sun,and goldengirl62. well this chapter is both charlie's and eddie's pov. From the previous chapters some of you got confused. So let me explain, chapter a letter to juliet..in that charlie was gona see the cullens to get bells back when he noticed she was missing but didn't cause he thought he would stop jake from leaving frist so he drove to tell billy first. Yes the bike was there but charlie moved it to the backyard since it would be disturbing having it infront of the house. Bella thought Charlie was mad at jake cause the bike its bellas pov so bella thought jake betrayed her she don't know that jake said it was a present from him. And jake did went away but something happened which you will know in jacobs pov for the reason he went to meet bella and edward.**

**Charlie's pov ( continues from chapter: a letter to juliet)**

What in the name of god, is going on with these two kids? They keep running away as if it's the only solution for their problems. Bells chose Edward?! And the last sentence was totally wrong. I feel bad for Jake. Wait I need to tell Billy. And Bella is in for a lot trouble.

I drove heading to la push, I must tell Billy about Jake's departure, I can't believe a guy could possibly leave his hometown just because the girl doesn't love him back. I guess he loves bells a lot more than I thought. I feel really bad for Jacob, I known his since he was born. He's like a son to me. When bells was away with renne, Billy use to send jake to stay with me so that I won't be alone. He is a nice kid, I knew he had a crush on bells since he was young and I thought they would end up together but I never knew that my daughter would be the one that hurt him. I know I should be going to the cullens to get bells but now jake is my priority. As soon I arrived at Billy's, I started shouting. "Billy .." "Billy where are you?" I heard Billy's voice from the backyard." what's with the hurry Charlie?" Billy came slowly while pushing his wheelchair around. "Billy.. Billy, jake is leaving" "what are you talking about Charlie?" he asked disbelief. " Billy listens to me! Jake came to my house just now. he told me that he was going to visit his relation in the south. Give me the address I need it now. "I shouted at him

"what?! We don't have relation in the south" as I thought jake lied. " then where in the heck could that kid go?" I shouted. " that kid ..i can't believe him" Billy said while sighing. "Charlie , I will ask Sam and the boys to look for jake this area, could you.." "way ahead of you Billy" I say without letting him finish. I drove to station and ordered my men to look jake. It was already past midnight, not a single sightings of Jacob. I guess bells would be at home about now. I guess I better tell her about Jacob. I got into the car and was heading back home but before that I stopped by at Billy's. we had a talk.

There I saw most of the boys except for Jared and Collin, guess they must be still looking for jake. Sam was talking to Billy but stopped when he saw me coming near. " Billy.. I'm so sorry " I said to Billy " it's ok.. the boys are still looking for him. Got any news?" he asked. "no.. nothing. That boy is one heck of a runner. he would win in the Olympics" I said trying to cheer up the mood but failed Billy was just quite. " Billy.. I'm sorry but I got to go now. bells would be home by now and I think she should know about this" I was surprise at Billy's reaction. " no.. " he shouted. Ok what was that for? " no. doesn't tell her about this. She doesn't need to know" " why not ?" "Charlie, you and I both know how close those two were a weeks ago, and suddenly she just ran off leaving him. Do you know how much that girl's action affects on him? Now he runs away so that must be something to do with bella and I don't think she should know this since **she is the one who caused it**" Billy said with furry. I have never seen him this angry before. Yes bella is my daughter but I couldn't argue with Billy in this. He is right that made me remained silent. "I'm sorry Charlie, but. Jake's my boy and you know I love him..i don't want to see him hurt and.." "it's ok Billy ..i understand" I said with that

I left with a heavy heart, by the time arrived home it was really late. There I saw, the bike that jake left for bells on the side, I moved the bike to the backyard. Since it would be disturbing having in front of the house. I checked bells before I went to bed. Billy words still echoed in my ears; **she is the one who caused it. **it kept echoing in my ears over and over till I fell asleep.

[the next morning]

I woke up earlier then usual, I was determine to settle things with bells today. I knocked her door before opening it. "Morning, Dad.""Oh, hey, Bella, I didn't know you were awake."well if you weren't awake I would have waked you up."Yeah. I've just been waiting for you to wake up so I could take a shower." Oh not so fast bella. ."Hold on," I said, flipping the light on. "Let's talk for a minute first." I saw her avoiding my eyes. ."You know you're in trouble."I said trying to get her attention."Yeah, I know."

Yeah I know? That's all she says. She isn't taking any of these serious is she?"I just about went crazy these last three days. I come home from Harry's funeral, and you're gone. Jacob could only tell me that you'd run off with Alice Cullen, and that he thought you were in trouble. You didn't leave me a number, and you didn't call. I didn't know where you were or when. Do you know, how any of us reacted on your departure? Do you have any idea how… how…"I couldn't finish the sentence, I couldn't say what happened to Jacob. I must respect Billy's request. I sucked in a sharp breath and moved on. "Can you give me one reason why I shouldn't ship you off to Jacksonville this second?"

I saw her eyes getting narrowed then she sat up while pulling the quilt around her and said"Because I won't go." What?! Where did she get this attitude from? "Now just one minute, young lady –" she cut me before I was able to finish"Look, Dad, I accept complete responsibility for my actions, and you have the right to ground me for as long as you want. I will also do all the chores and laundry and dishes until you think I've learned my lesson. And I guess you're within your rights if you want to kick me out, too – but that won't make me to go to Florida." What happened to my bells.? That edward kid had changed her totally

I could feel my face getting warmer. I took a few deep breaths before I asked her." Would you like to explain where you've been?" now I got her caught. "There was… an emergency." I raised my eyebrows, well I could figure that out alone "I don't know what to tell you, Dad. It was mostly a misunderstanding. He said, she said. It got out of hand." What the heck is she crapping about ? I waited with a distrustful expression." See, Alice told Rosalie about me jumping off the cliff…"what ? cliff diving? Is she trying to kill herself? She didn't mention about any cliff diving before? "I guess I didn't tell you about that," she choked out. "It was nothing. Just messing around, swimming with Jake. Anyway, Rosalie told Edward, and he was upset. She sort of accidentally made it sound like I was trying to kill myself or something. He wouldn't answer his phone, so Alice dragged me to… L.A., to explain in person." she shrugged

I was frozen for a moment there. what is this girl thinking ? "Were you trying to kill yourself, Bella?" I asked, as I can't think of anything. "No, of course not. Just having fun with Jake. Cliff diving. The La Push kids do it all the time. Like I said, nothing."

I can feel my face heating up – from frozen to hot with fury. Jake bringing bella cliff diving ? jake wouldn't that. He cares for bella more than his life and this is impossible. I shouted at her " you expect me believe that Jacob have you cliff diving just for fun?" "What's it to Edward Cullen anyway?" I barked at her. "All this time, he's just left you dangling without a word –"she interrupted me again . "Another misunderstanding." One more time I hear the word misunderstanding that's it. "So is he back then?" I asked even though I don't want to know the answer. "I'm not sure what the exact plan is. I think they all are."I just shook my head, why does she want this guy? Jake is so much more better. I got to stop this "I want you to stay away from him, Bella. I don't trust him. He's rotten for you. I won't let him mess you up like that again." I said while stressing every word.

"Fine," she said curtly. I rocked back onto my heels. "Oh" i scrambled for a second, exhaling loudly in surprise. and I thought we were gonad argue about this. "I thought you were going to be difficult." I am." she stared straight into my is? "I meant, 'Fine, I'll move out." My eyes bulged; what?! Ok.. she is out of her mind! Completely insane.. "Dad, I don't want to move out," she said in a softer tone. "I love you. I know you're worried, but you need to trust me on this. And you're going to have to ease up on Edward if you want me to stay. Do you want me to live here or not?"oh this is so not fair! Can't she understand that edward is just plain danger."That's not fair, Bella. You know I want you to stay."

Before I could argue with her, my phone rang, its from the station. Nice timing .. "these guys.." I muttered. I saw a smile on her smile" this talk isn't over yet, when I get back. We are gona finish this talk" with that I left. I drove to the station and found out that the reservation boys found jake, oh thank god. He already reach Courtenay by the time they caught him, man that boy is brought him to Sam's house since he and Billy fought just now. I parked the car and headed in Sam's house, I saw Jake sitting in the center of the whole reservation boys. They were talking about something. I coughed to get their attention. " charlie.. you are here" I heard some one say that it turns out to be Sam's future wife; Emily. " erm … yeah .. well boys could I have some time alone with jake" I asked them. " sure..sure thing boss, hey guys lets go" embry said " no..no..i think jake and I will take outside" I said while waiting for jake to join me. " sure ..sir" jake said while followed me outside, we stopped when we were out of hearing range. I turned to see jake looking at the ground. I sighed and I started " Jacob black what the hell were you thinking?" he still remained silent. " " jake I read your letter" he turned to look at me in the eyes that got his attention. "jake listen .. I'm not here to lecture you of your actions. I'm just telling you that, your actions have effect on us including bella" "sir..pls don't.." "jake listen , I'm not finished.. let me apologize on Bella's behalf. I am very angry with her action and I don't expect neither you or Billy to forgive her but .. think about jake.. why would you want to leave your home? If you love her enough you wouldn't think of leaving her." he voiced croaked abit "sir.. you don't understand, it's better for me leave to rather than stay. She wouldn't want me to be interfering her life besides she already has him. She doesn't need me" " Jacob black stop talking nonsense!!" I shouted at him. " who said she doesn't need you ?! you changed her.. after he left I felt so helpless because I couldn't help her change her pre-zombie character but you managed to change her. and you are not interfering in her life. You should be in her life and if you worrying about that edward kid. I banned him out of my house and from seeing bella anymore" his face brightened as I told him that. " what are you waiting boy.. get your butt to my house bells waiting for you!!" I said to him while patting him in the back. He started walking but stopped and turned back " what if she doesn't want to see me?" " uh.. don't worry about that.. she has no choice I grounded her … you better get going" with that he smiled and went into the woods. I guess that's a faster way to get to my house. Either way as long as he is with bells .. I don't mind. I better get going as well.

I arrived home sooner than I thought, but when I got there I didn't see either bells or Jacob. Ok .. what is going on? I sent a hormonal teenage boy to see my daughter who is apparently grounded. What the heck was I thinking. I rushed to Bella's bed room and knocked her door. No answer..this bad. I slammed her door open and I saw an empty bed. Great, well maybe they went out to talk, ok that's kinda better. I went down stairs and grabbed a bottle of beer and sat in front of the TV. I was thinking about what had happened in these few days, Bella's unexpected trip of so call emergency, and then jake departure and then…wait the bike… I totally forgot about the bike. I went to the backyard and brought it in front; I parked it at the driveway next to the cruiser. I think jake should give her the present herself. As I was about to go in side the house, I heard someone behind me. I took out my gun from my pocket slowly and then turned. I was aiming at the figure in front of me " woah just take it easy sir, it's just me Jacob" I scanned the figure and it was Jacob. What the hell is he doing here? I saw no sign of bells. " jake where is bella?" he stared at me surprise. " bella? I thought she went out? By the time I reached here, she's not here" " she is in for a lot trouble.. I told her strictly she was grounded and not to…." I said while turning to see a very sad jake. That edward is toast. "oh… I see sir. Well I guess, she's busy with him. Well I better get going sir" he said in a low tone "aww.. jake come on… be a man.. you know what.? You are not going anywhere until you talk to her" I saw his face still down. " so why don't you come in with me and wait for her inside" I invited him " no.. its ok sir .. I'll wait outside" with that I saw him going into the woods. Whats with this boy and the woods?

**Edward's pov (continues from chapter: icy cold)**

"Okay. You can take me home." I was waiting for that word from bella. I rushed her into woods, faster than usual just incase if Charlie might check her up tonight. As I was reaching Bella's house I noticed a shiny, red bike but no one is inside the house even Charlie, maybe he got a call from the station but who does it belong to. i guess bella and I didn't notice that before because we went out through the window, I tried to sense who it belongs to, as expected it was Jacob black; Bella's so called best friend. I hated him, he tried to win Bella's heart but in the end the girl is mine. That mutt what does he wants now? I guess he is trying to get bella back. I mustn't let her see this so I asked her " bella, close your eyes now , I'm going to speed up and I don't want you getting dirt in your eyes." "Why speeding up?" why does she have to ask questions for everything " well.. just incase Charlie might want to check you in your room" " oh.. then we better get faster.. ok all closed now" I heard her say, with that I speeded and brought her inside through the window. I laid her on bed and kissed her good bye. " Edward…" I heard her call out for me. " yes, ?" I asked her hoping she it isn't about the why we came in through the window?" I love you" " I love you too, go to sleep now. I will see you in the morning" with that I left.

[the next morning]

I came over to Bella's house around noon, I noticed the bike wasn't there anymore, maybe Charlie threw it away. I didn't bother about it much, I and bella went out for a while around forks. On our way home we had a small talk. .

"Don't start anything with Charlie over me, please. " I murmured. "Don't worry about it," she said calmly. "If Charlie kicks me out, then there's no need for a graduation deadline, is there?" i tightened my jaw, why is she so eager in this. "So eager for eternal damnation," I muttered. "You know you don't really believe that." "Oh, don't I?" i fumed. ."No. You don't." I glowered at her and started to speak. I was about to argue with her but she cut me off." If you really believed that you'd lost your soul, then when I found you in Volterra, you would have realized immediately what was happening, instead of thinking we were both dead together. But you didn't – you said 'Amazing. Carlisle was right,'" she reminded me. "There's hope in you, after all."For once, I was left speechless."So let's both just be hopeful, all right?" she suggested. "Not that it matters. If you stay, I don't need heaven."I got up slowly, and came to put my hands on either side of her face as I stared into her eyes. "Forever," I vowed, still a little staggered."That's all I'm asking for," she said, and stretched up on her toes and then press her lips to mine

Now we were on our way back to Bella's house before Charlie comes home. Bella said usually he would be late if he gets call from work. I saw her staring at the car window, she was deep in her thoughts. Wonder what she is thinking.. hopefully it's not about Jacob. Recently even when we were in the flight coming back from Italy, she was talking about him move than usual and her body is warmer than normal. The most strange thing is she smells like the mutts though maybe that's just, too sensitive. I asked bella what happened in between them when I was away, she said nothing unsual except for the cliff diving. Well I was worried about the cliff diving, thank god she is okay. But I was happy that they didn't get serious.

I was brought back to reality when I hear bella venting "It's just plain rude!". Ok what was that about . I was about to ask but I changed my mind when I heard her shouting "Down right insulting!". Ok now I am completely clueless. Is she talking to me or to herself?

"I guess Billy hates me now, too. It's not fair!"" she bluttered out. Oh I see, it about the mutt" It's not you, Bella," I said quietly, not wanting to show my happiness over she hating him. "Nobody hates you.""Feels that way," she muttered, folding her arms across her chest. It was no more than a stubborn good for me but I must show her that I'm on her side I said "Jacob knows we're back, and I'm sure that he's ascertained that I'm with you," I continued "He won't come anywhere near me. The enmity is rooted too deeply." That's stupid. He knows you're not…like other vampires." There's still good reason to keep a safe distance." "Bella, we are what we are," I said quietly, and he is a mutt and he doesn't deserve a human like bella, I said pointing out his weakness "I can control myself, but I doubt he can. He's very young. It would most likely turn into a fight, and I don't know if I could stop it before I k –"i broke off, and then quickly continued. "Before I hurt him. You would be unhappy. I don't want that to happen" I said with an angel like look in my face.

"Edward Cullen," she whispered. "Were you about to say 'killed him? Were you?" i looked away from her, staring outside. Why does she have to remember everything I say? I just kept silent , while thinking what to reply her. but if I don't reply her, she would think me that I'm the same like the mutt so I better say something. But what to say. "I would try…very hard…not to do that,"I said finally. I saw her staring at me with her mouth hanging open, but I continued to look straight ahead. We were paused at the corner stop sign. "Well," she said, and took a deep breath, shaking her head "Nothing like that is ever going to happen, so there's no reason to worry about it. And you know Charlie will be arriving any time now... You'd better get me home before I get in more trouble for sneaking out of the house." she turned her face up toward me, to smile halfheartedly.

Wait, I can sense Charlie.. oh god why does he have to be early"You're already in more trouble, Bella," i whispered through unmoving lips. she slid closer, clutching my arm as she followed my gaze to see what i was seeing. she just started in front and then ask" What? What is it?" I took a deep breath. "Charlie…""My dad, he's here already?" she screeched. i looked down at her then, and just stared at her. I tried to read Charlie's mind. I can't believe it, he actually likes the mutt better than me and he practically dragged the mutt to see bella. what was he thinking? Can he see bella wants me not the mutt?

"Charlie…is probably not going to kill you, but he's thinking about it,"I told me. I started to drive forward again, down her street, but i passed the house and park by the edge of the trees. I glanced back at Charlie's house. She followed my gaze, and noticed for the first time what was parked in the driveway next to the cruiser. Shiny, bright red, impossible to miss. Jacob's motorcycle, flaunting itself in the driveway. "No!" bella gasped. "Why? Why would Jacob do this to me?" I heard her say. well she did mention that mutt taught her to ride a bike, and I know that Charlie would disapprove that so I think bella is thinking that Jacob purposely brought this here to get her in trouble. Well that's a good twist.

Tears sprang, smarting, Bella's eyes, I saw her angry not sad. so what I assume is happening. A grin was on my face, but was washed when bella hissed "Is he still here?" I tried to sense the mutt, well what you know he is still here and he wants to talk. This should be interesting, "Yes. I can hear his thoughts around here." i told her, nodding toward the slender path that divided the dark fringe of the forest in two. Bella jumped out of the car, launching herself toward the trees with her hands already balled into fists for the first punch. What ?! bella is angry well that's good oh no.. love. I caught her around the waist before she made the path. "Let me go! I'm going to murder him! Traitor!" she shouted the epithet toward the trees. No.. no.. let me do the honor in killing him, I'm sure he would be glad. "Charlie will hear you," I warned her. "And once he gets you inside, he may brick over the doorway."

she glanced back at the house instinctively, and it seemed like the red bike was all she could see. "Just give me one round with Jacob, and then I'll deal with Charlie." she struggled futilely to break free, easy there easy.. by this point if I let her go she might choke him to death.." I want to talk with him?" she said sternly "I don't think that's a good idea" I said while smoothed her hair back from her face. "Don't worry; he's not here to fight me. He's acting as…spokes person for the pack.""Oh"i looked at the house again, then tightened my arm around her waist and pulled her toward the woods. I read Charlie's mind and guess what ? he is waiting to shoot me down. "We should hurry. Charlie's getting impatient."

"No, I want to talk to Jacob" she said while looking me in the eyes. "Very well if that's what you wish" We didn't have to go far; that mutt waited just a short ways up the path. He lounged against a mossy tree trunk as he waited, his face hard and bitter, . He looked at bella, and then at me. Jacob's mouth stretched into a humorless sneer, and he shrugged away from the tree. He stood on the balls of his bare feet, leaning slightly forward, with his trembling hands clenched into fists. He looked bigger than the last time I'd seen him. He doesn't look like a kid anymore, he's practically a grown man.

But I stopped as soon as we saw him, leaving a wide space between us and Jacob. I turned my body, shifting bella so that she was behind me. she leaned around me to stare at Jacob – to accuse him with her eyes. I tried to read his mind, I saw hatred, heart broken and pain. What is with this guy? Is he trying to suicide or something? Well if he is less job for me. Wait what? He imprinted on bella? I saw a few images of him and his packs fighting about bella. oh this is bad, as I know werewolves only has a mate; and is loyal to its one mate. Is he giving up? I saw bella staring at him with full of hate and anger. "Bella," Jacob said as a greeting, nodding once toward bella without looking away from me." Why?" I heard bella whispered, trying to hide the sound of the lump in her throat. "How could you do this to me, Jacob?" asking about the bike. The sneer vanished, but his face stayed hard and rigid. "It's for the best."

"What is that supposed to mean? Do you want Charlie to strangle me? Or did you want him to have a heart attack, like Harry? No matter how mad you are at me, how could you do this to him?" Jacob winced, and his eyebrows pulled together, but he didn't answer. "He didn't want to hurt anyone – he just wanted to get you grounded, so that you wouldn't be allowed to spend time with me," I lied but though make it seem as if I am explaining the thoughts Jacob wouldn't say. i know very well why he left the bike, he was leaving and he planned to give the bike back to bella as her birthday present. Cheap mutt.. I could buy her a car not like him giving back her bike as if he bought it. it's very obvious that I'm a better choice for bella.

Jacob's eyes sparked with hate as he glowered at me again. "What?" both bella and I heard Jacob said in surprise as he didn't think I would lie. but my bella beat him to it."Aw, Jake!" she groaned. "I'm already grounded! Why do you think I haven't been down to La Push to kick your butt for avoiding my phone calls?" Jacob's eyes flashed back to her, confused for the first time. What she's been calling him? Oh if this goes on, she wouldn't be on my side "Bells ... I ...don't ..." "He thought I wouldn't let you, not Charlie," I lied again but trying to show as if I'm explaining while cutting Jacob before he finished his sentence. "Stop that," Jacob snapped. He was scolding me in his mind, but there's nothing he can do bella is mine. I just remained silent at his reaction

Jacob shuddered once, and then gritted his teeth as hard as his fists. "Bella wasn't exaggerating about your…abilities," he said through his teeth. "So you must already know why I'm here." "Yes," I agreed in a soft voice as I tried to remain calm. "But, before you begin, I need to say something." Jacob waited, clenching and unclenching his hands as he tried to control the shivers rolling down his arms." Thank you," I said,. "I will never be able to tell you how grateful I am. I will owe you for the rest of my…existence." Jacob stared at me blankly, his shudders stilled by surprise. Yeah.. thanks mutt, for letting her come and rescue me. You know without your help I wouldn't have my bella back to me. He exchanged a quick glance with bella, but her face was just as mystified." For keeping Bella alive," I lied but trying to make it clarified in my voice rough and fervent. "When I… didn't." Edward –," bella started to say, but I held one hand up, my eyes on Jacob. Understanding washed over Jacob's face before the hard mask returned. "I didn't do it for your benefit."as I thought, he doesn't want to hurt bella by telling her the truth since her heart belongs to me now and forever "I know. But that doesn't erase the gratitude I feel. I thought you should know. If there's ever anything in my power to do for you…" Jacob raised one black brow. I shook my head. "That's not in my power." I said answering him, he asked me to get lost, leave bella. is he dumb or what? "Whose, then?" Jacob growled. I looked down at bella. "Hers. I'm a quick learner, Jacob Black, and I don't make the same mistake twice. I'm here until she orders me away." As if she will.

I waited for bella respond and I was glad." Never," she whispered, still locked in my eyes. Beat that mutt. Jacob made a gagging sound. she unwillingly broke free from my gaze to frown at Jacob. "But bells. you don't.." she cut him before he finished again. "Was there something else you needed, Jacob? You wanted me in trouble – mission accomplished. Charlie might just send me to military school. But that won't keep me away from Edward. There's nothing that can do that. What more do you want?" mission accomplished, fare well mutt. Jacob kept his eyes on me. I waited for him to say anything else if there was anything "I just needed to remind your bloodsucking friends of a few key points in the treaty they agreed to. The treaty that is the only thing stopping me from ripping his throat out right this minute.""We haven't forgotten," i said at the same time that bella demanded, "What key points?" Jacob still glowered at me, but he answered bella. "The treaty is quite specific. If any of them bite a human, the truce is over. Bite, not kill," he emphasized. Shut it mutt, it my problem on what ever I want to do with bella.

Finally, he looked at bella. His eyes were cold. It only took her a second to grasp the distinction, and then her face was as cold as his." That's none of your business." bella snapped at him." The hell it –" was all he managed to choke out. Well. What do you know bella agrees with me. Huh .. beat that mutt. You lost her for get butt from here.

. Bella's answer sent Jacob into near convulsions. He pressed his fists hard against his temples, closing his eyes tight and curling in on himself as he tried to control the spasms. His face turned sallow green under the russet skin. "Jake? You okay?" Bella asked anxiously. bella took a half-step toward him, and then i caught her and yanked her back behind his my body. "Careful! He's not under control," I warned is this guy trying to do kill bella? I saw the mutt was already somewhat himself again; only his arms were shaking now. He scowled at me with pure hate. "Ugh. I would never hurt her." Neither bella or I missed the inflection, or the accusation it contained. A low hiss escaped my lips.

"Let's go," I said if bella is here another one minuter I'm afraid that kid will tell her everything. she looked back at Jacob, torn. Would I see him again?" Sorry," he whispered. '"Bye, Bells.""You promised," she reminded him desperately. What is with her? what promise? "Still friends, right?"Jacob shook his head slowly. can't she see ? I'm the only one she needs! Friends? Who needs friends?oh bella you want friends.. there you got alice and rosalie! You don't need him "You know how hard I've tried to keep that promise, but…I can't see how to keep trying. Not now…" He struggled to keep his hard mask in place, but it wavered, and then disappeared. "Miss you," he mouthed. One of his hands reached toward bella, his fingers outstretched, like he wished they were long enough to cross the distance between her and him."Me, too," she choked out. her hand reached toward his across the wide space.

."Jake…" she took a step toward him. You missed him? What about me? You said you love.. oh no you are not getting her back mutt .i pulled her back again, my arms restraining instead of defending."It's okay," she promised me, looking up to read my face with trust in my eyes. He would eyes were unreadable, his face expressionless. Cold. "No, it's not." I said sternly. She is not going back to him. not now not forever "Let her go," Jacob snarled, furious again. "She wants to!" He took two long strides forward. A glint of anticipation flashed in his eyes. His chest seemed to swell as it no.. he is phasing .. i pushed bella behind myself, wheeling to face Jacob."No! Edward–!"

Jacob clenched his fists reflexively.I was waiting for his next move, but bella moved to be between us ; him and me. she saw me getting my stance, fighting stance. I got ready to fight. What ever it is bring it on mutt. Either way I'm gona win and you are gona loose. "Guys stop it…"bella shouted "if any of you make another move, you two are gona loose me." She said threatening us. Jacob's furious expression faltered. "I am sorry about that," he muttered. "I had to do what I could – I had to try…"Jacob's eyes were, red and with tears. Bella .. let me fight him, I'm sure I'm gona win love. I heard the mutt said something to her. "bells is this what you want?"hell yeah it is, mind your own business stupid mutt "Yes, Jake... this is it..." with that said, she saw Jacob turned behind and phased. Good job love. But then I saw his images, it him and bella kissing.

My face turned gloomy and sad, no she did not kiss him. Her kiss with him was more passionate then ours. That couldn't be, bella wouldn't cheat me, I have to do something. I heard bella calling me twice while shaking my shoulder. That's it , I think its time, I have no other choice either this or loose bella. I can't live without her especially loosing to this mutt, never. "Bella, I would change you in one condition" I saw a smile spread across her face. . "What is it? She asked me. Then I took a long breathe and said "Will you marry me?"she was about to say something but, she fainted. I rushed to her side and started shaking her body " bella.. bella are you alright" I called out for her. I checked her heart beat it was there slightly different than normal before I could examine it deeper, Jacob came out of no where, and started taking over. " hey mutt back off" I said, since bella couldn't hear. " shut it, leech" I hissed, but I am not gona fight with him with bella fainted. I too k her in my hands and adjust her in my hands, like carrying a bride. But my shoulder was gripped hard " put her down leech" "mutt, back off, I have no time to argues with you. I got to go" " no, she is not leaving until she is recovered" " I am bringing her to the doctor, so get out of my way" "that's not the way to the hospital" he said. " my father is a doctor and I'm sure he can take care of **my bella**" I said stressing the word **my bella**. "no, bring her to the hospital, idiot.. it's safer. I don't trust you or your family" "hey watch it! So you want Charlie to know what happened here. Now who's the idiot" I snapped at him back. "fine, but I'm coming with you" he grunted. " just stay out of way" I said while started to run with bella in my arms, I saw the mutt phased and started catching up with me.


	12. Chapter 12 team jacob

**Disclaimer: no, I don't own twilight and yes I hate Edward...**

**All hail Jacob!** **Team Jacob all the way...**

**The words in italic are the packs talking in their mind.**

**This chapter contains only Jacob's pov through out two chapters "A Letter to juliet" and "Romeo vs Paris". Its kinda like a continuation from one chapter to the other, filling in the gaps from the part where he ran away and right back where he met bella back. **

"Well i better get you " "ooh so soon- well ok then. Do you want to leave a message for bells?" " uhmm.. No sir. but… I guess you could do me favour me. Could you please pass this note to bells?" "Yeah ... sure Jake. Take care ok..You are not only Billy's son. You are mine as well ok?" I only smiled in reply. Good bye my love, I will always love you Bella.

I never thought that Charlie likes me that much. Oh well, no point in having your dream girl's father like you but not herself. As soon as I was far away from Charlie, I phased. I already planned everything; first I need get away from here, then track down that red-hair and kill her. Well I never thought what I would be doing after I killed her but I still have a lot of time so better not think about the "come back" for now? But then i couldn't help myself from thinking, by the time I come back bells might have married that leech. I started imagining bells in a wedding dress, she will definately look beautiful. Her white complexion against her brunette hair, that's a sight to be seen. Then I imagined bells walking down the aisle with Charlie by her side but then I shook the thought when I realized the groom wasn't going to be me. I was never good enough for her, I was always second best. Since I was young, I always liked bells. I really miss those times when she usually trips over something falls when she comes over to the beach, but most of the time she would pull me to fall this time, she pushed instead of pulling.I fell but she didn't. She is save but I am lost.

Thinking about my life now, it seems everything had changed. I was no longer her best friend, the one she trust, I was just a somebody. I try not to think about bells but I just couldn't, its just too much to take for a guy. I can't stand to think that my imprint is going to marry my enemy. Then suddenly I heard voices in my head, it seems that the pack just realised that I left. It's about time now, I already know that Charlie would definately call my dad to check on my excuse, he always did. Well I better speed up before they could catch up on me and I did. After some time, i stopped just to take in the surrounding and but before I could even realize the place i was at the moment, it was already dark. And so I thought I should call it a day, they would still be looking for me but I was already out forks by the time they started looking for me so I guess I'm ahead of them.

[The next morning]

I woke up with the sun light hitting my eyes; the sun was already up. I over slept, man! that's bad. Well not time to loose,better get going. I started running and running,to me it seemed like it was already days but it was just a few hours. My stomach started grumbling of hunger.

"I know stomach, your pain is my pain."

" wait what? When did I started talking alone ?"

"Well that's what people do when they are, all alone!"

"okay, hold up. who the hell are you?"

"God! you are such an idiot! I'm your conscience! No wonder, you let her slip away"

"Well excuse me, Einstein! where the hell were you for the past 16 years ? or better yet where were you when my heart skipped a beat for the for time when i met bella? where were you? You could've told me, that that was a foolish dream.."

Silence. cricket chirping. silence. wind blowing. silence. leaves rustling in the trees. silence. 

Well what do you know? Embry was right. I am crazy. At that point I can't take it any more, I was too hungry until I can't think anything else but food. Come on, the hunger drove me nuts until my conscience was pissed off at me.

So I made a stop at the locals after I phased. Since i got to save money for my journey, I can't order much. Leaving me to just order plain coffee with toast. Well I wasn't quiet comfortable eating there not because of the food it's just the waitress there was hitting on me. I didn't pay much attention to her but still I'm not comfortable. There is only one girl in my heart and that's Bella, no one can replace her.

After my meal I got out quickly and phased. I started heading south, I was already nearing Courtenay but something pushed me to side and I fell hitting a tree. Before I could I regain my fighting stance something hit me again and I fell on my back.

That's when I saw embry on top of me, he is pushing me back. I started shouting _"embry what the hell are you doing here? Get off of me!" _

_"no can do jake" _

_"embry don't be hard on him. Just keep him still that's all"_ sam said.

I stared above me and there was the whole pack except Leah .

_"what the hell? Sam !"_ I shouted at sam. I can't believe this! I expected them to respect my decision, simple. Just leave me alone.

That's all, They can't even do that , I thought to myself. _" it's not that we don't respect your decision jake, it's just that …"_ sam started but embry interrupted

_" it's just that you didn't say good bye to any of us, come on Jake we are brothers don't we deserve a proper good bye"_ embry said with a grin in his furry face.

_"Well you want a good ! "hey guys, good bye." There I said it, now get off me"_ I said sarcastically.

_"Hey what about Billy and... And... Emily... ah... you didn't say good bye to emily."_ Embry said and continued before I couldn't even reply to him.

_" jake, how could you? after all that emily did for you, she cooked for you, she washed your dirty socks and underwear and she even bathed you…." _

_"what?"_ the whole pack except embry said in unison while looking at embry_. _

_" hey..hey guys.. it's a figure of speech.. work with me here"_ embry said to cover up his mistake.

"_embry get off of him!"_ sam ordered. Embry did it immediately

_" Jake.."_ sam started.

_" listen , we are not here to change your decision, we are here to remind you that you are the true alpha, I'm just temporary waiting for you to take over and by that meaning .."_ I cut him off

_" I told you over and over. I don't want to be the alpha! You are more suitable for than position than me" _

_" jake listen I am not finished, you can't change who you are, and the alpha blood runs in you and if you don't want to be the alpha. Have you told your decision to billy?"_ he got me there , I never told dad that I don't want to be an alpha.

He would propobably just lecture me so I let it slip aside. Sam continued_,"As I thought, so before you leave, don't you think you have to tell billy your decision? It's not just a simple matter jake. And billy deserves to know your decision"_ embry interrupted again

_"yeah, so why don't we just go back and pretend any of these has ever happen"_ embry thinking about it for quite some time, i said

_" no, Embry. I will come with all of you but only in one condition. That is, after I tell my dad about my decision, I'm leaving and I don't want anyone following me or trying change my mind ok?"_ everyone agreed even embry well that's a huge surprise, I seriously thought we were gooing to argue.

_" plan B guys"_ I heard embry whisper

_" ,who's getting the rope ?"_ seth asked. rope? Ah ha! I thought so

_" embry don't even think about tying me with a rope"_ I snapped at him. _" ah man…"_ I heard embry said frustrated.

We reached emily's house after a while, as soon we reached there, we phased. I was welcome back with emily hugging me.

" ooh jake.. you got us all so worried" she said while still hugging me. She left go off me when she heard dad's wheelchair. There I saw dad staring at me,

"erm.. guys. I made you all pies, why don't we got and eat " emily said trying to get the guys to leave me and dad alone.

" oohh.. sure.." jared said while getting to the kitchen and everyone followed him leaving just me and dad.

"Dad, I can explain." he remained silent

" dad I know you are still angry but it's for the best. You know, I can't stay here watching my imprint being with another guy. I'm sorry but I can't change my mind. You must understand me" I said while staring him in the eyes.

" well son, if you still remember you are suppose to be the next alpha and what are you going to do about that. You can't just leave it" he said sternly.

"Dad, you and both know that sam is a better alpha and besides I don't mind giving the title to him. Even if I became the next alpha, I can't concentrate with Bella on my mind." I said while kicking the dirt in front of me with my eyes on the ground.

"Then ... forget her" I turned to look at my dad at the moment he mentioned it.

" what?" I started shouting

"Dad, how could you say such a thing ? you imprinted on mom and did you forget her? did you?" I demanded an answer from him.

I can sense my body getting god, this is not good. I'm getting out of control

" that's different jake, bella and your mother aren't the same"

" no dad you are wrong, you loved mom just like I love bella and I can't never forget her just like how you can't forget mom even after all these years" how could he say such a thing to me, I'm his son. I couldn't control myself much longer if this goes on.

" jake what's the matter with you! Can't you see .. she doesn't wants you and why don't you just move on. I'm sure there's a lot of girls for you and besides who cares she is your imprint. She doesn't even act like your imprint .If she truly was .. she would have been here with you, not with that kid." He barked at me. That's it, my body , got warmer and I started to phase but then collin and brad threw themselves on me trying to keep me from doing anything that I might regret . I saw sam bringing my dad inside the house, when he was out of my sight .. I started to regain myself and I phased back. Embry came out and said that sam is bringing dad home, and I just nodded in reply. Collin and brady brought me back to the house after my dad and sam left.

" Jake, what's going with you? Have you lost your mind? First you tried to kill me and now your dad. If you are trying to get to jail then be my guest I'm sure Quil would like to volunteer himself if he doesn't stop eating my blueberry pie" embry said while increasing his voice so that quil could hear him from the kitchen.

" Guys, I don't know what's gotten in me ? I'm scared .. I might hurt any of you guys... I don't know why but I can't control my anger." I said trying to make them understand my situation

"bro we understa…" embry stopped mid sentence when we heard someone cough.

" Charlie.. you are here" emily said while trying to tell us who it was. All of us went silent, .

" erm … yeah .. well boys could I have some time alone with jake" charlie asked them. Ooh boy not again. .

" sure..sure thing boss, hey guys lets go" embry said " no..no..i think jake and I will take outside" charlie said while waiting for me to join him. " sure ..sir" I followed him outside, outside well I think he's gona shoot me. We stopped when we were out of hearing range, I guess this is about me lieing to him..oh god what am I gona tell him..?

he sighed and started " Jacob black what the hell were you thinking?" I remained silent thinking of the perfect excuse.

"Jake, I read your letter" what? Did I just hear that? I turned to look at him in the eyes. Oh no.. oh no.. I am freaking was right, i am you conscience! What was I thinking of giving him the letter? Well apparently I wasn't thinking?

"jake listen .I'm not here to lecture you of your actions. I'm just telling you that, your actions have effected all of us including bella" oh god.. did he scold bells? Oh man.. I'm an idiot

"sir. Please don't..." I was about to tell him not to scold bells but he cut me before I could finish.

"Jake listen, I'm not finished. Let me apologize on Bella's behalf. I am very angry with her actions and I don't expect neither you or Billy to forgive her but... think about it Jake. Why..Why would you want to leave your home? If you love her enough you wouldn't think of leaving her. Doesn't that make you closer to a person Edward is? you are not never will be him" what? Why is he apologizing? Aren't I the one supposed to be saying sorry cause I slept with his daughter?. Dad? Wait did he scold bells? Charlie.. charlie she is the very reason I'm leaving, I love her and I want her to be happy that's why I'm leaving. My voiced croaked a bit

"sir... you don't understand, it's better for me leave to rather than stay. She wouldn't want me to be interfering her life besides she already has him. She doesn't need me" " Jacob black stop talking nonsense!"he shouted at me

" who said she doesn't need you ? you changed her. After he left, I felt so helpless because I couldn't help her change her pre-zombie character but you managed to change her. and you are not interfering in her life. You should be in her life and if you worrying about that edward kid. I banned him out of my house and from seeing bella anymore" what ? did I just hear that right?

Charlie wants me to be with bells and that leech is banned from seeing bella. I couldn't be much more happier. " what are you waiting boy?Get your butt to my house bells waiting for you!" he said to me while patting me in the back I don't know what to do. I'm filled with so much .glad. happy.

I started walking towards bells house. Ooh bells I missed her.. I can't wait to see her. but wait what if she doesn't want to see me ? I stopped and turned back

"what if she doesn't want to see me?" I asked charlie.

" uh.. don't worry about that.. she has no choice I grounded her … you better get going". She's ! she must be angry with charlie but still she is my imprint I think she would change her mind when she sees me. Maybe she would accept me? With that hope I ran to the woods and phased to get faster to bells.

I reached there a lot faster than usual but there was no sign of bells anywhere, maybe she had an emergency maybe she had told charlie about it. Nothing to worry I think, I went to the nearest tree and sat under it.

I waited for bells till I fell asleep, i was woken up when I heard seth's voice.

" hey jake.. wake up"

"huh..what are you doing here seth?" I said trying to open my sleepy eyes.

"Well the guys got worried so I came to check on you, if you are waiting for charlie he is just getting in the house" "em.. thanks seth.. tell the guys I might be late but not worry"

" ok." with that seth phased and left.

I better ask charlie when bells might comeback. I saw bells bike at the driveway, Charlie was about to get in the house but I sensed him stopping mid-track before I could say anything he turned while aiming the gun at me.

" woah just take it easy sir, it's just me Jacob" I said while putting my hands up.

"Jake, where is bella?" what?

" bella? I thought she went out? By the time I reached here, she's not here"

"she is in for a lot trouble..I told her strictly she was grounded and not to…." Charlie stopped and checked on me, emm she's with him. I should have known. I lost her. .

"oh… I see sir. Well I guess, she's busy with him. Well I better get going sir" I said in a low tone.

"aww.. jake come on. Be a man you know what.? You are not going anywhere until you talk to her" charlie said trying to cheer me up.

" so why don't you come in with me and wait for her inside" he invited me but I refused.

" no. its ok sir, I'll wait outside" with that I went into the woods. I want to go now, I want to leave but I would like to see bells for the last time. Its been awhile since I last saw her.

After awhile I sensed a car coming near here, I sensed something cold.. real cold. I sniffed to check the smell. As I thought it's the leech, if he's here then... I started sniffing again there I sense bell but it wasn't normal. She smelled like me maybe my nose isn't good today. I waited for her just near her house but far from hearing range.

A few moments later, I saw Bella with the blood sucker, I immediately lounged against a mossy tree trunk as I waited, I can sense my face hard and bitter. I looked at bella, and then at the leech.

My mouth stretched into a humorless sneer, and i shrugged away from the tree. I stood on the balls of my bare feet, leaning slightly forward, with my trembling hands clenched into fists. I saw the leech stop as soon as he saw me, leaving a wide space between bells and me. The leech turned his body, shifting bella so that she was behind him, I wish it was me who was protecting her like that from him. She leaned around him to stare at me – I saw her eyes its as if she is accusing me. I must be imagining stuff bells wouldn't do that.

"Bella,"I said as a greeting, nodding once toward her but without looking away from edward."

"Why?" I heard bella whispered, trying to hide the sound of the lump in her throat.

"How could you do this to me, Jacob?" I saw her face wearing a sad mask, her eyes were filled with tears.

Did I make her cry? Oh god I feel bad. I never wanted bells to cry. Was she asking about my departure? She does care for me doesn't she?

"It's for the best." I replied her trying to hide my small hapiness.

"What is that supposed to mean? Do you want Charlie to strangle me? Or did you want him to have a heart attack, like Harry? No matter how mad you are at me, how could you do this to him?"

I winced, what? What is she talking about? Why would my departure make Charlie want to strangle her? I am guessing that she isn't talking about my departure. I was about to ask her but was cut by that leech.

"He didn't want to hurt anyone – he just wanted to get you grounded, so that you wouldn't be allowed to spend time with me" I heard that leech say.

"What?" I said. that fu*cking leech, he is saying that to make bella think as if it was my thought.

"Aw, Jake!" she groaned.

"I'm already grounded! Why do you think I haven't been down to La Push to kick your butt for avoiding my phone calls?" she called, but why didn't dad say to me? Wait she doesn't know that I left? charlie didn't give her the letter!

"Bells ... I ...don't ..." I was about to explain to her but that leech beat me to it.

"He thought I wouldn't let you, not Charlie," I heard him say while having a grin on his face.

"Stop that," i snapped.

I scolded him in my mind. I shuddered once, and then gritted my teeth as hard as my fists.

"Bella wasn't exaggerating about your…abilities," i said through his teeth.

"So you must already know why I'm here."

"Yes," he agreed in a soft voice. .

"But, before you begin, I need to say something." I guess, he is gona tell the truth so i waited, clenching and unclenching my hands as i tried to control the shivers rolling down my arms.

" Thank you," he said. Thank you? For what?

"I will never be able to tell you how grateful I am. I will owe you for the rest of my…existence." That cheap idiot he is using me to get Bella's trust.

"For keeping Bella alive,"

"When I… didn't."

"Edward –," bella started to say something, but he held one hand up, his eyes on Jacob.

"I didn't do it for your benefit." I did it for bells, since she is my life. I couldn't get myself to tell bells the truth about that leech, it will break her heart.

"I know. But that doesn't erase the gratitude I feel. I thought you should know. If there's ever anything in my power to do for you…" oh you can glady, get lost. get out of bells life! She shouldn't be hanging around someone this dangerous.

"That's not in my power." He said answering me eventhough in was just in my mind, he could read it.

"Whose, then?" I growled. He looked down at bella.

"Hers. I'm a quick learner, Jacob Black, and I don't make the same mistake twice. I'm here until she orders me away. He is using bella as a shield. Is he a man or what? I waited for bella respond and It broked my heart.

" Never," she whispered, still locked in his eyes. I made a gagging sound. she unwillingly broke free from his gaze to frown at me.

"But bells. you don't.." she cut me before i finished again.

"Was there something else you needed, Jacob? You wanted me in trouble – mission accomplished. Charlie might just send me to military school. But that won't keep me away from Edward. There's nothing that can do that. What more do you want?" I was speechless.

My imprint was talking like this to me defending my arch enemy. I was going to tell her the truth but it seems no matter what I tell her, she isn't going to believe me.

"I just needed to remind your bloodsucking friends of a few key points in the treaty they agreed to." The treaty that is the only thing stopping me from killing him right here.

"We haven't forgotten," he said calmly.

"What key points?" bella asked since she doesn't know about it. I still glowered at him, but answered bella.

"The treaty is quite specific. If any of them bite a human, the truce is over. Bite, not kill," i emphasized so that both of them would know.

Finally, i looked at her,my eyes were cold. It only took her a second to grasp the distinction, and then her face was as cold as mine.

" That's none of your business." bella snapped at me.

" The hell it –" was all i managed to choke out. The hell it is bells, you are imprint. It is my duty to protect you from any harm.

Bella's answer sent me into near convulsions. I pressed my fists hard against my temples, closing my eyes tight and curling in on myself as i tried to control the spasms. my face turned sallow green under the russet skin. How can I say to her that i imprinted on her? It hurts me for saying telling her but what if she doesn't accept the fact that I'm her imprint. That's going to hurt me a lot.

"Jake? You okay?" I heard Bella asked anxiously.

Bella took a half-step toward me. Bells.. I waited for her to come closer but then I saw edward caught her and yanked her back behind his body.

"Careful! He's not under control," that's when I realise that my body is warming up again. No ! no! not bells.. i already almost killed both my best friend and my dad. I tried to remain calm, slowly my body began to be normal again. I scowled at him with pure hate.

"Ugh. I would never hurt her." Neither bella or he would have missed the inflection, or the accusation it contained. A low hiss escaped his lips.

"Let's go," I heard him said to looked back at me, she looked torn.

"Would I see him again?"she asked him.

"Sorry," i whispered, it felt as if half of me was being torn away from me.

'"Bye, Bells."

"You promised," she reminded me desperately. Yes.. and that is the very reason, I'm leaving. I will never hurt you I promise.

"Still friends, right?"i shook my head slowly, friend? Bells you are my life! I owe my life to you, solely you.

"You know how hard I've tried to keep that promise, but…I can't see how to keep trying. Not now…" not now as you chose him over me, your imprint.

"Miss you," i mouthed, I tried to reach one of my hands toward bell, my fingers outstretched, i wished they were long enough to cross the distance between her and me. I wanted to to grab her and hold her close to me. Never wanting to let her go. The moment was just too hard to believe it was as if we were connected, as if she could feel my pain

"Me, too," she choked out. her hand reached toward mine across the wide space. Her mouth is saying but deep down she doesn't wants me.

"Jake…" she took a step toward me. but then he pulled bells back again, his arms restraining instead of defending.

"It's okay," she promised him, looking up to read his face with trust in her eyes. He would eyes were unreadable, his face expressionless. Cold.

"No, it's not." He odered her. no one gets to order my imprint."Let her go," i snarled, furious again. "She wants to!"i took two long strides forward.A glint of anticipation flashed in my eyes.

That's when my chest seemed to swell as it pushed,i saw him pulling her behind himself, wheeling himself to face me. "No! Edward–!" I heard her say, it wasn't my name. oh! how i wished it was my name.

I saw him waiting for my next move, but bella moved to be between us ; him and me. She saw Edward getting to a fighting stance. I saw him ready to fight me. Oh! this is it one on one.

"Guys stop it!"Bella shouted

"if any of you make another move, you two are gona loose me." She said threatening us. My furious expression faltered in an instant

"I am sorry about that," i muttered. Oh god what have I done? I was about to danger one of my loved ones again."I had to do what I could – I had to try…"I said but couldn't I felt my eyes filled with tears.

I couldn't control my feelings, "Bells is this what you want?" him? Not me?i asked her even when I know I wouldn't like the answer.

"Yes, Jake... this is it. she said, well in that case. There is no need for me to be here anymore, I turned back and phased. I left her with him there. Good bye my love, maybe will you get the happiness that you always wanted. I may not be the one for you but I will keep my promise to you.

I wasn't far from where I left her, but I don't know why but I had a bad feeling that something happened to bells, the imprint bond alerted me. So I went back, and I saw bells lying on the ground. Bells! What did he do? I saw him examining bells heart beat, this isn't good so I went over to check bells.

" hey mutt back off" he said

" shut it, leech" I hissed waiting for him to argue back but he didn't.

I saw him took bells in his arms, wait she isn't going anywhere without me! I gripped his shoulder

" put her down leech"

"mutt, back off, I have no time to argue with you. I got to go"

" no, she is not leaving until she is recovered"

" I am bringing her to the doctor, so get out of my way"

"that's not the way to the hospital" I said.

" my father is a doctor and I'm sure he can take care of **my bella**" he said stressing the word **my bella**.oh he is just being hard.

"no, bring her to the hospital, idiot! it's safer. I don't trust you or your family"

"hey watch it! Do you want Charlie to know what happened here? Now who's the idiot" he snapped at me back. Well he does have a point.

"Fine, but I'm coming with you" i grunted.

" just stay out of way" he said while started to run with bella in his arms as long as I was with her I'm sure the leech won't try to do anything to her.

Along the way to the cullen's house, I alerted the pack about this incident _"don't worry jake, she will be fine. Just stay with her. We will be there soon."_ Sam said.

As we were approaching, I saw a very huge mansion, it was beautiful. I guess the leeches are loaded, maybe that's why bella chose him. It's true I could't get her whatever she wants. I sighed while phased and followed edward inside the house.

The house stinked like them, as I got in I saw a red hair with the local doctor.

"Oh my god! What happened to bella?" "Its nothing esme..carlisle help" ooh so her name is esme and his is carlisle. Edward handed bella to carlisle that's when a blonde girl came down stating

" eww.. what's that smell" oh she got on my bad list even before I talked to her. A big sized guy came down following her.

All four of them stared at me, the blondie asked

" what is a dog in the house"

"hey, whatch it blondie!"I sneered at her

" Rosalie. Whatch your manner's. I'm sure he has a good reason to be here" esme said.

"hey sorry about her,she's always like that don't mind the way, I'm emmet " the big guy said while shaking my hand. I just nodded in reply.

"He's here because he wants to make sure that bella is safe" edward said.

"Well then, welcome to our home please make yourself comfortable" Esme said with a smile. Why is she smiling at me? I saw the doctor bring bella upstairs, I followed him. He placed bella in one of the rooms, and started checking her heart beat.

A few minutes later, I heard embry's voice downstairs. I was about to get up but the doctor stopped me and said "No worries, I will ask Alice to get them here" ok now he's better than the Edward. I can't see how they are related?

I heard the door slammed, and there was the whole pack except for Leah and Sam.

"Jake ... whats wrong with bella?" embry asked in corncened. The pixie came in and shouted.

"Why are all you crowding here?" all of us were staring at her. Then a new guy, he was blonde as well but a lot more different than emmet but weird. He called us

" Your leader wants all of you to meet him in the next room"

" ok. come jake" embry said when it was just me and embry still in the room with others left.

" it's ok..don't worry. I will look after her and i promise to keep her safe" he assured me, when realised i didn't have any intention on moving from the place

"See doctor fang said its ok. So come on, lets go before sam gets mad."embry called .. doctor fang? Ok i can live with that.

We left and went to the next room. As I opened the door, the pack was already sitting. Sam called us,

"Jake, what happened?"

"I don't had an argument and I left but I didn't feel right leaving bells alone, so I went back to see her but she was lying on the ground by the time I arrived."

"Do you think, he changed her? Was there a heart beat?"

" no! no, Sam. She's...still alive. I could feel the bond still alive."

"Then, all we can do now is wait." Sam said and everyone nodded. But I still felt insecure leaving bells alone with doctor fang. A short while later, Ssme came in with a bunch of food with emmet and the weird guy bringing in the drinks. "don't worry, we didn't poison it. Its completely safe" she said but waited untill sam took a sip of the drink and started eating then we all followed him. Esme left the room leaving emmet and the weirdo.

Emmet sat beside me while his brother just stand. "hey.. you must be jacob!"

"I heard a lot about you from bella" he said I stared at him in surprise wow…bella talked about me to them.

"hey don't be surprise, it actually is quiet often and most of the time, it pisses know he's jealous of you" he said.

Well wadya know I kinda like this guy. We chatted for awhile,Emmet introduced the weirdo, his name is jasper. He is the pixie's mate where else emmet is the blondie's. Then, we all stopped chatting when we heard the door open and it was doctor fang.

I got up and asked him, "what's wrong with bella?"

"well nothing wrong, let me explain in detailed when my son arrives here" nothing wrong then why was she on the ground? Edward came in telling doctor fang that the girls were taking care of bella.

"ok. So, since everyone is here, let me say bella is perfectly fine and healthy"

"then why did she fainted?" edward asked.

"that part is where I'm confused but now I know"

"and…" embry asked because it was killing as much it was for me to wait any longer.

"Well, bella is pregnant"

"what?"both I and edward said while the others were having their mouth wide a huge pause untill

"I'm going to be an uncle.I'm going to be an uncle" embry was practically yelling with happiness while the others followed suit except for sam.

"so its.. you" Edward asked but I smirked at his reaction. He stormed out the room and Emmet and the weirdo left trying to catch Edward but Emmet congratulated me before leaving the room.

I can't believe it! bella is having my child.

"well whadya know? Our jake boy is pro. just one shot man. I gotta hand it to ya jake" embry said.

"ok, I'm going pretend that I didn't hear that since I am over the top now"

"ok..well can talk "Dr fang asked and I nodded. "ok. When did you and bella..er..er.?"he was trying to say that but man this is embrassing.

"Erm.. the day she left for italy" "oh so that makes the total of five days she has been having your child" "ok .. so I checked her heart beat and both she and the baby are fine."

"If I'm not mistaken, it takes 15 months for a werewolve child to grow, am I right?" I was clueless, but then sam said yes.

" so bella is your imprint?"

" yes..dr fang".

"ok, do you want this baby?" I couldn't answer that, I do want the baby but what if bella doesn't

"it's her choice" I said.

"what?" embry shouted.

" jake! Its your child, a part of could you..?"

"Embry, she is the one whose going to be carrying the baby for 15 months .And I don't want to force her if she doesn't want it

"you're a nice kid" doctor fang patted my back.

"She's awake" the pixie came and told us.


	13. Chapter 13 big mistake ?

**Disclaimer: no, I don't own twilight**

**All hail Jacob! Team Jacob all the way...**

**This chapter is dedicated to jacobfan216, connect2tjb, goldengirl62 and to all jacob fans and also j/b fans. **

**Bella's from (chapter:romeo vs paris)**

"Oh hey bells, you're wide awake. how are ya? How's the big guy doing"Embry was talking to me with a huge grin on his face... wait why is embry here? Big guy? Who? "Shut it embry" I heard Sam scolding embry. Wait Sam's here too? I turned to look at Jake but his eyes were on embry and then I saw Jake smacked his forehead with his hands. I turned to see what bothered Jake that much. And guess what? I saw the whole wolf pack in front of me in the Cullens house. A pack of shapeshifters in a Vampire's lair? Now I'm sure I'm hallucinating stuff.

I asked Jake " Jake why are they here? Am I sick?" "Well bells...erm... erm..." I saw Jake fidgeting his hands. Wait, why is he nervous? I couldn't wait for his reply so I asked Carlisle. "Carlisle, what's wrong with me? Am I sick or something" "well Bella, not on what I observed so far, I think you are..." I waited for him to say it but he was taking time longer than he usually does. ugh! just answer me! "Go on." I said softly masking my frustration. "Well, I think you are pregnant" my mouth went wide.

Did I hear that right? I thought he said I'm pregnant. I shook my head " No. No. You are kidding me. Come on, stop joking. I'm not in the mood for jokes now" I said letting out my frustration abit at Carlisle. But his face was too serious to be joking. Oh god. This can't be happening. "bella, I'm not joking" Carlisle said. "Oh god, how did.."I stopped mid sentence when I remembered what happened between Jacob and me the other day. Then I turned to look at Jacob by my side, he was holding my hand in his but he wasn't looking at have i done? I must have hurted him but I thought it was just a mistake. I didn't think it would have come this far.

"Well since she's awake now, so why don't we just finish this right now? I don't feel comfortable having mutts in the house" Rosalie hissed, I'm not surprise when the whole pack growled at her. Hold on, finish what? "It's not like we enjoy being here" Quil snaped at her back. "Ok, now then lets get started." I heard sam said while taking a seat near me, as I can see by now everyone is siting except for Rosalie and Jasper. But they were not the person I was looking for.

Edward was no where in sight, my eyes were still searching for him around the room but it was futile. I really hope, he doesn't get this matter in the wrong way. "Missed me?" Edward whispered in my ears out of no where. I was taken by suprise when i saw him right beside me but on the other side of the bed, which is opposite Jacob's. I heard a low growl from Jacob, "Ok then everyone is here now. Bella..." Sam started. "Well as we know now, you are having Jake's child right?" I nodded in reply; I felt my cheeks getting warm. I must be blushing hard now. "So what are you planning?" he asked. "Planning? about what" "about the baby of course?" embry interupted. "oh.. I haven't thought about that, but I think I'm going to keep it" I said, I can't afford to loose my baby. I know it's a mistake but it's a part of me, I can't afford to risk it's life. The problem is how do I persuade Edward to accept my decision.

"I see,very well then, but yo need to know there are few rules if you are planning to keep the baby" what? "What rules?" "Bella, as you know, you are carrying a quilette in you. And it's very dangerous for you and the baby to be around us during your pregnancy" Carlisle said. "Yes, and so during your pregnancy. You can't be around them"Sam said supporting Carlisle's comment. "no!" I shouted, "There is no way I'm going to be apart from them for 9 months" "erm, not 9 but 15 Bella" carlisle corrected me. 15? No way! I am not going to loose my chance in becoming one of them after all that had happend.

Finally, i'm getting dream come agreed to change me and now this happens. Why? why does this kind of things happen to me? I can't choose, i mean I can't live without Edward but at the same time.. the baby. I can't..

Edward. The baby. Edward. The baby. . The baby. baby.

they were running through mind, Can't I have them both? But then, wouldn't that make me selfish. How could I force Edward to accept a baby that is not even his own and better yet his mortal enemy? But then If Edward did accept it, how would Jacob react? He would most definately hate the fact that his child is living with the cold never like Edward since the begining. What i am saying,how would the whole pack accept that ?They would surely want to keep it here for the rest of it's I wouldn't be here, The Cullens couldn't here, they stayed here long enough. Sooner or later they must move away. I can't.. I can't loose them... Him.. I'm sorry little one, but mommy has to do this, for the sake of everyone.

"I'm sorry but I am changing my mind. I don't want this baby" I stated. Jacob released my hand at the moment, I saw him. His eyes were filled with tears. I heard him whisper "bells…" he was pleading "I'm sorry Jacob but I couldn't be apart from them for that long, besides I told you. Its just a mistake." " A mistake? Well you should have thought of that before you slept with him?" embry shouted both angrily and sarcastically. I felt like as if I was slapped.

Before any of us could respond, I saw Jake pushing Embry against the wall; he lifted Embry with one hand, sliding Embry back against the wall "Don't you dare say that again to her or I swear, I will kill you and I meant it" Jake said in a low but scary tone. Both Jared and Collin were already by Jake's side, pulling him away from embry. At the same time, trying to calm him down. It was the first time I saw jake, this scary. He was defending me,just liek how he did back at Billy's when I slapped Paul.

I thought he hated me after all I did but i guess... " Jake, what's gotten in you ? did you just hear what she said? How can she say it's a mistake? Jake that baby it's not only hers, its yours as well. Don't you want the baby?" embry said in his 's right but I'm the one who is going to carry it for 15 months and so I have the right to say if I don't want it. I waited for jake to argue but he shouted " Embry shut up! This isn't you problem. Its between me and Bella, I do want the baby but it's her choice whether to keep it or not? But no matter what she picks, I'll be by her side all the time. " he said to embry. Jake..I was touched. I didn't know he could be this understanding, I'm glad to have him as my best friend even after all that had happened.

" Thanks,Jake. I know I can count on you" I said while smiling at him but he just remained silent. "erh.. Bella could I have a word with you in the kitchen" Esme asked me and I just nodded in reply leaving the boys in the room. I hope that they don't kill each other was what I thought as I went down stairs and straight to kitchen. I was surprise to see Alice was there as well. Ok why do I get the feeling that this is going to be a lecture? "Bella have a sit" I obeyed Alice. Esme started "bella…dear, I'm not going to tell you what to do. But do you think, this is what you want?" "about?" I asked her, playing dumb hoping to avoid the matter. "well, about the baby, ofcourse. Bella, I know how it feels loosing a child and I don't want you to go through the same thing" Esme had once told me, about her past. She had a son, but he didn't survive long. "And besides Jacob looks like a responsible guy and I'm sure he will take good care of you and the baby" esme added but I'm not going to change for my mind, I love edward and that's it. Nothing is going stop us from being together.

"I'm sorry esme but I'm not going to change my mind. You know I love all of you and I can't be apart from all of you for that long. Besides, having the baby is just going to make things mor complicated and plus, Edward agreed to change me if I marry him. I'm sorry but I'm not going to loose my only chance to be one of you." i said and there was a long moment of silence for " well.. I guess I'm going to go and check on them" I said not wanting to be there as it gets more Alice and Esme in the kitchen. I was shocked to see Rosalie standing in the middle of the stair case, as if she was waiting for me.

"Could we talk?" rosalie wants to talk with me? This pregnancy keeps getting weirder. We sat on the couch, as I waited for Rosalie to say something which she eventually did but I cut her first "okay if this is about the baby, I'm sorry to disappoint you but I'm not going to keep this baby, and nothing you are going say is going to change my mind" "Bella, I seriously don't understand you at all. Why are you so eager in becoming a vampire? There isn't any happiness in being one, vampires are just bloodsucking being who don't have souls and you want to be that? Do you know, what I would give to be in your place? I always wanted to have a family and you are going to have one but what you doing is trying to do is throw away everything you got and for what to be us?" rosalie said, it was the part of her that I never knew it existed. "I thought you were smart, but you just proved to be like everyone else." and she's back. Sarcastic Rosalie, gald to have you back.

"I'm sorry if I'm over reaction but it's the truth. you shouldn't be one of us, its not the.." "Bella." Edward interrupted Rosalie. "Rosalie, if you mind" he asked Rosalie to give us some, time alone. "Fine, but think about it Bella. Once you are us you can't go back" "she heard enough Rosalie" Edward said sternly. Ok now what's wrong with Edward. "When did it happen?" should we even talking about this? This is just embarrassing and whole a lot awkward. I'm talking about me sleeping with my best friend to my boyfriend. Great can life be much better. "Well. it was just a mistake. I don't even want this baby" I said trying to make him understand. He remained silent. And then said. " Bella, are you sure? I mean this is really important and you have to think twice about it."

Is he doubting me? "Edward I am more than sure. I want you more than anything in this world, more than this baby." I said to him, while getting lost in his eyes. "I love you" he mouthed, "I love you too" Carlisle joined us. " Bella have you made your decision?" he asked. " yes, and I'm not going to keep this baby, Carlisle " " bella, please think very carefully" "yes I have thought of it more than once and I'm not going to change it. I'm not going to let my chance in becoming one of your family just because of this." I said while rubbing my belly.

"But I'm sure I'm going miss it. I always wanted to be a mother but its ok, as long as I have you nothing matters to me." I said while looking at Edward. "Bella, you don't need to do this, you know you can both" I heard Carlisle said. "What are you talking Carlisle?" I asked him. "Well, you could keep the baby and when it arrived you can get married and edward will change you. In that way you get to be a mother and have become our family too. I just can't stop the fact from the moment I knew you were pregnant, I keep seeing visions of esme when I found her. She looked terrible, she was so heart broken the fact that she lost her son. And I don't think my son could handle that situation with you" I started to think about what carlisle said.

It did make sense but I already thought all about it nothing is going to change then edward and i had a talk after Carlise left. The talk di cleared up my confusions and at that moment i know this is what i going to do and i made up my sure this time.

[back in the room with the packs after bella had a talk with Edward ] Bella made her mind and the whole Cullens and the pack were waiting for Bella's decision.

"I heard that you have made up mind?" Sam asked. "Yes. I will keep this baby in one condition." "and that is….?" " I can visit the cullens twice a month" I stated waiting for sam to say something " but Bella you don't understand, it will be dangerous for you and the baby. The baby isn't fully developed and it's hard for the fetus to adjust to the Cullens body temperature by you being close distances with the Cullens. It might not be very healthy for the baby. It might ..." "no... Bella, you have my word. You can visit them twice a ..i too haveone condition. That is I should be with you all times when you are making trip here" I heard Jacob said cutting Sam.

"Fine, with me" I said keeping what Edward told me in my mind. "Jake, we are having a talk after this, and with that out of the way, now let's go to the next one. As the father of the baby Jacob must be with Bella all the time so that incase the baby has some problems trying to adjust to Bella's body since she isn't of Quileute blood the baby might have problems with the body heat. Next, is treaty. It remains but there will one of us always around bella other than Jake even when she comes over here. And from now on bella will go for check ups with Sue and only her" he said while staring at Carlisle at the last part " ok .. we agree"


	14. Chapter 14 no worries

**Disclaimer: no, I don't own twilight and yes I hate Edward...**

**All hail Jacob! Team Jacob all the way...**

**This chapter is dedicated to ****jacobfan216, connect2tjb, goldengirl62 and to all Jacob fans and also j/b fans**

_**"Kismet happens"**_

**"gift from the gods".**

**"I'd IMPRINT that"**

**"My own personal sun"**

**"Hotter than any vampire"**

"**don't forget that you have options"**

**Bella's pov**

"Ok ... we agree" Carlisle said without hesitation. I saw Esme's face lit up at that moment and I wasn't surprise to see Alice squeal as well. "Bella! you are going to have a baby and I'm going to be an aunty. I'm so happy for you" Alice said it in the same breathe while hugging me.

I kinda expected that from Alice,after all she is my sister or would be in the future. Letting that aside, i focused on Jacob. I realised there was a smile on Jacob's face but his face is still hardend. Behind him, the whole pack was quite quiet. Ok now, that's weird, I have never seem them this quiet something happen while i was away just now?

They all were quiet and serious, that is untill Esme asked "So boys, since it's already late would you like to have dinner here?" Wrong question, to my surprise, they were schocked. The boys response to the invation was checking out each other. It's like they don't care or Are they tried to act like they don't care. hmm.. now that is something you won't see everyday, the pack refusing to eat. I think it's going to rain candy if the pack refuses her offer.

"What's for dinner? O negative or AB positive?" Embry said breaking the whole you could hear the whole pack was i thinking? They seriously don't know any manners do they? "Shut up Embry!" I heard Sam scolding Embry but Esme replied with a calm tone and a sweet smile on her heart-shape face. "oh no dear, we are vegetarian as we only drink animal blood"i was mentally facep palming myself. "I'm so sorry for their bad manners" Sam apologizes to Esme. "Oh no it's ok, not many people know about our eating habit. So I wouldn't blame them for thinking like that about us." she replied Sam

"No. no. what they actually meant was, they don't want you to go through all the trouble to cook for us... right guys? Sam said while biting his teeth at the last part. The pack just nodded in reply when they got the scary stare that Sam always gives them when they get out of hand, which is most of the time. "No ...no...Don't be silly. It actually gives me the chance to use my kitchen. But I wouldn't force any you, if you don't like it."She tried to hide her dissapointment "Sorry, but we should be leaving now, mam."

"Ugh! Finally !" Rosalie muttered her frustration. "you know what Blondie, I'm getting sick of you." Paul snapped at Rosalie. "Who cares what you think of me? Stupid mutt!" "What did you just say?" Paul snapped at her and went for it. If it had not been for Quill who held back Paul or Embry who thought making a bad blonde joke would totaly change the atmoshpere which indeed did, the heated up argument would've been a disaster.

"You know, I got to someone who doesn't even recognise her air freshener, you got alot of nerve to pick a fight with us, even if we are on your land."he stressed the last part. "What?"  
"Oh bro! you mean. She was the one on the five o'clock news yesterday?"Jared just had to join in the crew. " Yup, that's blonde who had totaled her red BMW M3 in a horrific accident." " What was that Mongrel ?" Rosalie didn't back away either. Embry took a step closer to her without any slight hint of fear and said in a low tone " Just admit it, golden retriever." "admit what? that you guys are scared to take on a vampire alone and that's why you always travel in pack" " you were driving alone yesterday when from out of nowhere a tree pops out in even so you are leech you got suprised and swerved right and left untill your car now looks like an accordian that was stomped on by an elephant."Embry counter attack her. "I thought there no trees in that highway."Jared always the impatient "it doesn''s just blondie here was dumb enough to not realise it was just her air freshener swinging back and forth the whole time" the whole pack laughed and not to mention Emmet as well.

"But hey guys, we can't actually blame her for being a was born that way" "oh..oh.. you're killing me here!" Emmet said in short of breath due to laughing for a long time. "Oh that does it!" Rosalie was about to lung and rip Embry apart but thank god Emmet and Jasper held her back. "Enough!" Sam's voice erupted the whole mansion. "Embry, you shouldn't have done. We came here in peace for 't try to ruin all of you, get out and stay out there untill i come" without no argument they all obeyed him. "And as for you, know your limits. Don't ever mess with us again. And by the way, we travel in pack not because we fear but because we value our family and we look after each other."Sam left as soon as he was done . Why do I have a feeling that he wasn't implying that to Rosalie only?

I was still in daze by what Sam had said.", we got to leave now, I'm sure Charlie would be waiting to listen to your long explaination." Jake called me while holding out his hand for me to accept it. "Er..Sure." I was about to accept it but an arm snaked around my waist and pulled me behind, that arm happens to belong to Edward. "Edward what are you..?" "I will take her home" "no ... she is coming with me. Back off" Jacob not again. Why do both of them keep fighting every time all three of us are at the same place? " calm down." I turned to face Jacob and said "Jake, I'm coming with you." Then turned to face Edward to comfort him. "Edward, you just promised you won't make this a big deal?" "I'm sorry love, I just got carried away" he said while kissing my forehead. I heard a low growl from Jacob. I guess i have to tone down my relationship with Edward for now. "Good night Edward" "good night love".

As soon as we were out of the Cullen's mansion, Jacob phased and he brought me home as fast as he could. I should say it was a great experience riding on a werewolf back,and way different than riding on a vampire's back.

[Back at Bella's house]

I saw Charlie standing at the front door; well that surely states that I have got a lot of explanation to do. "Bells" I heard Jacob call me after he phased back. "Yes."i replied him but my concertration is fully on Charlie who was looking very pissed off right now. "Bells... thank you." I was about to ask him because he caught me off guard with that comment "thanks for.." he cut me before I could finish asking " We better hurry, before Charlie gets mad" "he is already mad, I just don't know what to say to him" I said frustrately while kicking a stone on the ground, totally forgetting his previous comment. "Don't worry about that, I got you covered. Just follow my lead" Jake said while leaded me to Charlie.

"Isabella Marie Swan! You stay right where you are? The same goes for you Jacob" he shouted. Follow your lead Jacob? Really? "Where have you two been all day long?" "Well... sir you asked me and talk to bella so I brought her over to the bonfire. Sorry it got a bit late" Charlie's face loosens up a bit when he heard Jake. "Oh ... ok. But what about before going to the bonfire where have you been Bella? Don't try to lie; I know you were with that Edward kid." "Dad, can we talk tomorrow" "No! Not at all, I said we will finish it today and today it is. Now get in the house and Jake thanks for bringing her home safely you may go now." he said to us. I obeyed him and went in the house. I turned back to see Jacob before I went in but he was no where to be found.

"Take a sit bella" Charlie pointed at the sofa. "Dad ...i can..." "Bella, listen to me first. I know you are a grown up now, and I would really like to treat you as a grown up but if you keep acting this way I'm afraid I can't treat you like that. And as much as I hate to say this I have to. I'm sending you back to Jacksonville." "no!You can't do that! Dad, I don't deserve this. You can't force me!" "As your father I have all the rights. Now go to bed, tomorrow morning you are leaving and that's final" he said sternly while looking at me "Fine, if you want me to go away so much then I will!" I stormed out of the living room and went to my room. I slammed the door shut and jumped on my bed. "This is so not fair! I can't believe this is happening to me?" I said it out loud. "Bella?" I flinched when I heard someone whispered my name, I turned to find myself a shirtless Jacob in my room, staring at me.

"Jacob ...not now..." I said turning my back at him. "Bells. I'm sorry. I didn't think it will come this far. It's ok if you don't want to keep the baby. I won't force you. I will support your decision no matter what it is. I have your back Bells." "Oh Jake... it's not about the baby. It's Charlie." "What about him?" Jake asked while taking a seat next to me. "Well, he thinks I'm acting like a kid and so he wants to punish me by sending me back to Jacksonville" I said in anger. "What? Bells don't worry; I will try to figure out way to calm down Charlie. For now, you better go to sleep. You need all the rest you can get, I will come over around noon."

He got up and started heading towards the window but stopped when he heard me say "Noon? Charlie is sending me back tomorrow morning Jake!" he was silent for awhile then he turned to face me and asked "Bells, how you told Charlie about the baby?" "Of course no Jake, what do you expect me to say? Hey dad, wanna know something I just found out I'm pregnant with my best friend's child." I said sarcastically what was he expecting; I would like to hide this matter for as long as I can. I saw his smile turn upside down. oh god I feel so bad. I hurted him a lot lately. "Jake... I'm...sor" "its ok bells, I understand." He trying to change that smile back into what it was before but he failed.

"No Jake, I didn't mean it that way. It's just that, a lot had happen in these few days and I just can't cope up with things." "Yeah... a lot had happened, didn't it?" he said while cupping my face in his hand, only now I realize that his face was so near to me. "Yes" I said in reply. "We're a pretty messed-up pair, aren't we? Neither one of us can hold our shape together right?" "Not really Jake," I said while looking him in the eye, there's something I feel... something warm... I can feel it in his gaze.

I continued not being aware of anything else but him "I can't say that for all i know is that, you will always be there when I need you, and that makes me stronger. I'm sure we could get through this together." I said as my face was just a few inches from Jake's. I know in a few seconds something might happen, I better stop it before I do something that might regret again. I turned my back to him, not wanting to have Jake's lips on mine.

"I'm sorry.. I did it again. Didn't i?" I heard Jake asking me about the whole intimacy part of our relationship. "'s ok. The only thing in my mind now is Charlie. Jake, I don't want to leave... I don't want to leave you, Edward or any of them..." my voiced croaked, I know I'm going break down in few minutes.

I just can't handle all these in a few days time, I just came back from Italy after meeting a bunch of vampires and then I had a big argument with Edward about my mortality and I just found out that I'm pregnant. To top it all off, my dad wants to send me back to Jacksonville. I am sure I am going to cry in a few minutes but I can't do it in front of Jacob, I have to try my best to hold back my tears.

But then I felt a pair of very strong arms around my waist Jake whispered "... don't cry...i'm here. I'm sure we can go through this together." He was hugging me from behind as my back is pressing against his chest, oh how I missed this warm body. My personal space heater. "Jake... promise me you won't leave me" I asked to him.I want him to promise me. i wanted his reassurance of never living my side.I need him. I can't go through this all alone. I need my best friend by my side for this... i waited for his reply but he was silent.

"Jake..." I called out for him when he took a long time to reply be honest i was scared, what if we weren't on the same page. "Jake please don't leave me, I don't think I can go through 15 months without you. Don't make me go through the same thing he did" at that very moment, I felt Jake's face against mine. His cheeks were against mine, I could feel his breath. It was long and deep. Then the husky voice said "Bella, I promise you. I won't leave... I won't leave you alone. I promise you." He said while kissing my cheek which made me blush.

He chuckled and spaced a bit from me which now Jake and I are facing each other face to face. "Oh, how i missed your blush" he said and continued smiling again. I try to change the subject. "How could you be smiling, Jake? How am I supposed to stop Charlie from sending me back tomorrow?" I started getting worried again . "Don't worry bells, I got all figured out. You just need to do exactly what I say." Jake said and with that he told me his plan and I have to agree it was good, hopefully it works.

"Bells, it's getting late get some sleep. I will try my best to come as soon as possible tomorrow ok? Just do as I say and I'm sure you will be fine." He reassured me and then left through my window. I was drifted to sleep while kept eyes at the window, somehow wishing he would comeback anytime soon.


	15. Chapter 15 my life as jacob black

**Disclaimer: no, I don't own twilight and yes I hate Edward...**

**All hail Jacob! Team Jacob all the way.**

**This chapter is dedicated to jacobfan216, connect2tjb, goldengirl62 and to all jacob fans. **

**Jacob's pov on Chapter 12 and 13. I was extremely eager to write this chapter because i wanted to write jacob's feeling on his imprintation on wrote about how he felt for nessie . I wanted to write what he would've felt for bella. **

"She's awake" the pixie came and told us.

That's all I needed to hear, I rushed out of the door pushing my way through the pack. I almost knocked Emmet down on my way to Bella's room, I heard him shouting at me "why the rush?" but I didn't bother to answer him. I slammed the door open and there I saw the love of my life, she was more beautiful ever and the fact that she is carrying my baby tops it all. I saw her looking at me back with surprise written all over her face, I made my way to her, on the way I pushed the blonde since she was in my way. Well to tell the truth, I just wanted to do that to her; I really don't like her but that doesn't matter now.

All that mattered is Bella, I pulled a chair and sat next to Bell's bed. "Bells... honey are you, ok? I asked her while taking one of her hands into mine, trying to comfort her. I looked at her in the eyes, those two pools hazel eyes that i fell in love with, that i often i get lost in. Oh.. how much I missed it. "Jake, why am I here?" she asked me, there is slight fear in her voice. How am I suppose to tell her the news? I could... Well actually I want to tell her the news. I do, I really do. I want to see her glow out of happiness because the news.I want to see her eyes get teary because we are going to have a baby together.I want to be able to hug her and spin her around the room.I want her to scold me for doing that, because she thinks that it might hurt the baby. I want to say to her that to me she's the most beautiful girl in world and that it makes me feel so happy that she cares for the baby.

And to tell her that the next girl I'm ever going to love would only be our daughter. But what if she doesn't want it? What if, she hates me even more than before? I can't take that. I love bells and I want to be in her life. And I see that fate has been kind enough to give me a another chance with Bella. It did gave me once before when He left but i failed and got kicked to the this time, i'm going to make it I believe that we were destined to be together and i'm going to prove it.

I took a deep breath, gathered up my courage and opened my mouth "Well Bells.. while you were in the woods just now, you fainted" I released the breath that I held in without even realising it. I am still staring at her in the eyes hoping that she knows that this is hard for me but I'm trying my best to break the news as lightly as possible but also hoping some how she gets what I'm trying to say without even saying anything "How long have I been out?" she asked. "Well a few hours" I said while caressing her cheek, it felt warmer than usual. Maybe she is having a fever? "4 hours to be exact" I was brought back to reality when I heard it. Both Bells and I turned to see who it was. And it was Dr fang, well good timing doc. "Doctor Fang, her body is feeling warmer than usual" I said while still caressing her cheek.

"Well, I guess that's some of the symptoms…" Dr fang said. Oh.. so theres more to pregnancy than just having a baby inside you, I never really took much interest in this topic because back then I thought I would'nt have the need to know. I alwys knew Bella is the one for me, if I'm ever going to have a family of my own, It's with her and no one else. But back then, she wasn't mine, she still isn't..But I have hope know how some people say "baby, I think you wore that dress for me" or "I knew, she was the one for me the moment she step out of that door" . I always thought those were lame pick up lines because you can't just know that you are destined for each other just by looking .

It's suppose to be more like how Bella and I shared a childhood together and that even by the slightest change in her face reaction I could sense her worry. But I realised I was wrong, it doesn't always need even the littelest thing could bring down a mountain. Just one look, just one touch,just one 's all, the rest just happened on it's feeling of needing her in my life grew stronger when I imprinted on her.

I could still remember it, as if it was just yesterday. It was at her kitchen, when everything inside me came undone as I stared at Bells. Into her eyes, as if it's the first time I saw her. the way she looked at me was much more different than usual, it was as if it's the first time she saw me as Jacob and not just her childhood friend. And that's when I too started looking at her, as the one that I wanted in my life. Before that she was my crush. As our lips connected, I felt as if all the lines that held me to my life were sliced apart in swift cuts, like clipping the strings to a bunch of balloons. Everything that made me who I was – my love for my childhood friend, my love for my father, my loyalty to the pack, the love for my other brothers, my hatred for my enemies, my home, my name, my _self_ – disconnected from me in that second – _snip, snip, snip_ – and floated up into space. I was not left drifting. A new string held me where I was.

The gravity of the earth no longer tied me to the place where I stood. It was the girl infront of me, my Bella. When I opened my eyes, I saw her as a new person. Not just my crush, not just my childhood friend but my other half,my significant other, my soulmate, my love, my everything. I knew from that moment, the reason I breathe, the reason my hearts beats, the reason I'm going to live another day is all going to be for her and only her. I always knew Bells was going to be in my life but on that very second when time itself stopped moving for me, I looked in her eyes, that's when I knew I have found the missing pieces that I have been looking for all my life. I stared in her dark brown eyes, I saw my future in an instant and there it goes. I knew then that my life was complete, I found my other half.

I flinched and was brought back to the present time when I heard Bella shouting "what's going on with me? I tried to calm down Bella. "Calm down Bells." but failed. Bells started shouting at me "You expect me to calm down! Jake! How the heck am I here ?" Dr fang was about to say something but was interupted when someone barged into the room, "Hey Blondie, move. I gotta see Bella"I heard embry. Who let him in? I was about to ask Embry to leave but he cut me to it.

"Oh hey Bells, you're wide awake. How are ya? How's the big guy doing" what the hell is Embry thinking? I didn't even tell her yet! Big guy? Who in the hell said I'm going to have a son? Though I do like having a boy .Not now, now. I shooked my head trying to forget that and concertrate on the current situation. "Shut it Embry" I heard Sam scolding embry. Thank god he did, if it was me. I would have punched him. I was too much paying attention to Embry and Sam untill I didn't realize that the whole pack had came into. I smacked my forehead with my hand, what are thiese guys trying to do here? Bells just woke up. She needs all the rest she could get, she certaintly doesn't need all these drama now. I heard Bella calling out for me. I turned to look at her "Jake, why are they here? And am I sick?" she asked her pleading eyes.

What am I suppose to tell her, I was stuttering over my words while fidgeting my hands. I might even beat the waiter in plays where the waiter falls in love as soon as the preety girl looks up from the goes to offer. "water?" But when the words come out, it comes out "waiter?". I might even beat that guy, cause here's what i said. "Well bells...erm... erm..." Before I even finsih, I heard her asking "Carlisle, what's wrong with me? Am I sick or something" "Well Bella,not exactly. Based on what I observed so far, I think you are..."Dr fang looked at me asking if its ok for him to continue, I nodded in reply, I rather not make a fool of myself once more. "Go on..." Bella said. "Well, I think you are pregnant" I saw Bells reaction, her eyes as well as her mouth went wide.

I waited for Bells to reply. I was in that situation where you are dying to know but still afraid to find out. I saw her shook her head and said ". You are kidding me. Come on, stop joking. I'm not in the mood for jokes now" she said while staring at Carlisle. I got my answer, she doesn't want it, she thinks it's a joke.I had my head down looking at floor to avoid anyone looking at me crying silently. There goes my took back the chance. He replied her "Bella, I'm not joking" I heard Bella; "oh god, how did.."I heard her stop mid. She doesn't even want to talk about the other she even wanted it to begin with.

"Well since she's awake now, so why don't we just finish this right now? I don't feel comfortable having mutts in the house" the blonde hissed. Stupid blonde, I heard the pack growled back at her. I feel them, that blonde is keep getting on my nerves and by the rate she is messing with us I won't be suprised if all of them got mad at her. "It's not like we enjoy being here" quil snaped at her back. "Ok, now then lets get started." I heard sam said while taking a seat near me and Bells, everyone is siting except for that stupid blonde and the weirdo. . "Missed me?"I heard the leech whisper to Bells, I saw him taking a seat on the other side of the bed, opposite me that is. I growled at the leech, the feeling to protect my imprint and our unborn child was making making me getting out of control, I tried my best to stay put, though I;m not sure how long could I maintain it.

"Ok,now that everyone is here, Bella..." Sam started. "Well as we know now, you are having Jake's child right?" Sam asked her, she nodded while blushing. "So what are you planning?" he asked. "Planning? about what" she , that isn't good. "About the baby of course?" Embry interupted. "Oh..I haven't thought about that, but I think I'm going to keep it" she said. What? She said she is gona keep it. Oh, thank god! Thank you fate, thank you very much. For her to accept me over him, it means the world to me. I couldn't be happier.

"I see, very well then but you need to know there are few rules if you are planning to keep the baby" what? "What rules?" she asked. Oh right. "Bella, as you know, you are carrying a quillete in you. And it's very dangerous for you and the baby to be around us during your pregnancy" Dr fang said. "Yes, and so during your pregnancy. You can't be around them" Sam explained. That's a very good rule, but I'm not sure if Bells coul obey it since she is extremely close with the pixie but I'm sure she will do it since it's for the baby. "no!" I heard hee shout, i heard my heart being torn as well "There is no way I'm going to be apart from them for 9 months" "erm, not 9 but 15 Bella" Carlisle corrected her.

The room went dead all of sudden, so did I. She tore my heart away from me,for every second she took her time to think about it. It hurts me to know that, she actualy had to still I had faith in Bella that she won't let us down. "I'm sorry but I am changing my mind. I don't want this baby" she stated at that moment my heart stopped beating, I released her hand that I was holding on to with my dear life not because I wanted to but because I lost control over my body. My eyes were filled with tears no mater how much I tried not to. I was just thinking about having a family of my with my imprit, I thought my life was going to change but she crushed it all with those words.. I whispered "Bells…" hoping that she might change her mind or even think again about it. "I'm sorry jacob but I couldn't be apart from them for that long, besides I told you. It's just a mistake."

A mistake? that word stabbed into my heart deep, she called my baby a mistake. A thing we created a mistake. The bond that we had a mistake? how could she? " A mistake? Well, you should have thought of that before you slept with him?" I heard Embry, shout out of anger. But before i could even process a word he said, I ran towards him and pushed him against the wall, as I lifetd him with one hand. I know what she said was wrong but she is still my imprint and I don't care brother or not. Nobody gets to disrespect Bells. "Don't you dare say that again to her or I swear I will kill you and I meant it" I said in a low but deep tone. I would have phased there if it weren't for both Jared and Collin who pulled me away from Embry, while trying to calm me down at the same time.

" Jake, what's gotten in you ? Did you just hear what she said? How can she say it's mistake? Jake that baby it's not only her's, its yours as well. Don't you want the baby?" Embry said, every word he said meant so much more but what he did is still unforgiveable. " Embry shut up! This isn't you problem. It's between me and Bells, i do want the baby but it's her choice whether to keep it or not? But no matter what she picks, I'll be by her side all the time." I said, it wasn't just for Embry it was for Bells and everyone so that they know no matter what happens, she has me. I could be her safe harbour or even punching bag" Thanks, Jake. I know I can count on you" she said while smiling at me but I just remained silent. "erh.. bella could I have a word with you in the kitchen" Esme asked bells and she just nodded and left the room with esme

[ these scenes happened while bella was downstarirs with esme,Alice and Rosalie (check out chapter 13) ]

Oh god. Is she calling Bella to congratulate on her decision ? Or Are they getting rid a part of me that is in her, right this very second? Alot of things were going through my mind but the very second Bells left the room, the leech grabbed my sweat shirt. "Why did you rape her?" he said with venom in his words, I pushed him back and growled at him, I was already on the first stage of phasing but Sam stopped me. He pushed me a little so that he could be infront of me. By the time i had control back, I realize the whole pack was with me, they were standing beside me. I felt a hand on my shoulder I turned to see who it belongs to and its Embry. " Sorry." I mouthed "It's ok bro.." he replied with a smile. I glanced back at Sam who was talking to Edward. "whatch your mouth ! It may be your land, but that doesn't mean you get say whatever fit your mouth." Sam was pissed off. He was scary even for us, but that didn't stop that leech .

" Why must i? He raped my Bella and he did that so he could steal her away from me. Stupid mutt can't you see that, She doesn't wants you!" I remained silent trying to calm myself from ripping that leech into pieces. "Remember the treaty, Jake" " who says so? You better shut up before I make you to shut it. Bella wasn't forced to do anything and it's none of your buisness to get in between their relationship" Sam fired back at him. "Oh it sure is, Bella is my soulmate and I have all the right. Besides I'm preety sure that mutt might have threatended her to do so." he said " Who are you to talk about soulmates? It's us who live with our I can assure you that Bella is not your soulmate and never will be because she's Jacob's imprint. The true Alpha's imprint. You think your love for her could break that bond that they have. I bet not."

The leech shouted in anger and frustration know Bella was my imrpint i think . He left the room as soon as he can.

Carlisle came closer to me and said "Jacob, I know you mean well to Bella. I feel bad for you, I honestly do. And I'm sorry for my son's behaviour. Don't worry I will try to talk to bella about this" he said with a smile and left the room. There we were, the whole pack just complete silent. Not a sight that you could see everyday. We just staring at each other for a long time untill Sam broke the silence. Somehow I know that they felt the pain that I feel, because we are brothers and always will be. "Jake,i'm proud of you" Sam said while giving me a man hug. " You did well just handled the situation just now way better than I thought you would, very smooth and you made a good decision on letting Bella choose."Sam said so highly of me as if it's going to make me feel better. " I know it must have been hard for you but no matter what Jake, remember we will always be brothers" Embry said while patting my back.

[back in the room with the packs] Bella made her mind and the whole cullens and the pack were waiting for bella's decision.

"I heard that you have made up mind?" Sam asked. "Yes. I will keep this baby in one condition." "and that is….?" " I can visit the cullens twice a month" she started and waited for Sam to approve it but he " But Bella, you don't understand. It will be dangerous for you and the baby. The baby isn't fully developed and it's hard for the fetus to adjust to the Cullen's body temperature by you being in a close distance with them. It might not be very healthy for the baby. It might..." I heard Sam trying to explain to Bells. I know her well to say that she wouldn't listen to a single word he advices her. And I also know that fate didn't take back my chance. I need to grab it before it slips away again."No... Bella, you have my word. You can visit them twice a month. But I too have one condition. That is I should be with you at all times when you are making your trip here." I waited for her reply, hoping she would accept it.

"Fine, with me" she said. "Jake, we are having a talk after this, and with that out of the way, now let's go to the next one. As the father of the baby Jacob must be with Bella all the time so that incase the baby has some problems trying to adjust to bella's body since she isn't Quillette blood the baby might have problems with the body heat. Next, is treaty. It remains but there will one of us always around Bella other than Jake even when she comes over here. And from now on bella will go for check ups with Sue and only her" he said while staring at Carlisle at the last part " ok .. we agree" was what they said.


	16. Chapter 16 thats the spirit jake!

**Disclaimer: no, I don't own twilight and yes I hate Edward...**

**All hail Jacob! Team Jacob all the way.**

**This chapter is dedicated to jacobfan216, connect2tjb, goldengirl62, smallfrykukie, Dbz-Diva4evaand to all Jacob fans. **

**The words in italic are the thoughts of the pack while phased.**

**~An eclipse last a day, the sun is eternal.~**

**Jacob pov continues from (chapter: my life as jacob black)**

"Okay ... we agree" Dr Fang said. Thank you god, thanks you for givinng me a eyes drifter at her, I saw some colour on her cheeks, and her eyes were dark hazel as usual but with a glow. My gaze went down and stopped at her stomach. I stared at it long, there's a life in her and it's a part of me.I am grateful that my child is given a chance to live. Bella, on the other hand, is still a mystery to me.I couldn't tell if she hated the child she carried for the fact of how it was fathered, and by whom, or if she would tolerate it once it was born, or if she could bring herself to love it. Hell, back a few moments ago she could barely bring herself to tolerate _my_ presence, although she spoke occasionally to me. I am painfully learning that eventhough she is my imprint,I have to fight for her still.

I was distracted when the pixie blocked my view. She squealed in excitement "Bella! You are going to have a baby and I'm going to be an aunty. I'm so happy for you" the pixie said while hugging Bella. That disturbed me abit, _"I'm going to be an aunty" ?_ what? What did she mean by that? I saw the look on Sam as well as the rest of the pack._They were disturbed by her comment too_. As I thought, all of us had the same look as I did when we heard the pixie say it.

There was long silence in the room; I was so busy thinking about what to say to Sam. I know he disagrees the idea having Bella visiting the cullens. He is right i should obey him. Heck, call me selfish, I don't I am to be called selfish for wanting to save my child's life then call me one.I don't care. I don't want Bella to be with them as well but my child's life is in stake. I'm very sure Bells wouldn't have agreed to have the baby if I had followed what Sam had suggested.

"So boys, since it's already late would you like to have dinner here?" I heard Esme asked, I was in no mood to eat and I'm pretty sure the rest of the pack wouldn't want to have dinner at house full of bloodsuckers. "What's for dinner? O negative or AB positive?" Embry cracked up a joke to lighten up our mood.I must admit, that was a good one. Embry sure as hell know how to cheer us up. "Shut up Embry!" I heard Sam scolding Embry, but we all know know deep down in him; he feels the same way as Embry feels. Its just as the Alpha, he's trying to take care of our manners. While Esme replied in a calm tone while smiling "Oh no dear, we are vegetarian as we only drink animal blood" "I'm so sorry for their bad manners" Sam apologizes to Esme.

"Oh no, it's ok. Not many people know about our eating habit. So I wouldn't blame them for thinking like that about us." she said to Sam ". What they actually meant was, they don't want you to go through all the trouble to cook for us... Right guys? Sam said while biting his teeth at the last part. Sam really knows how to talk the talk. The pack just nodded in reply."No ...no...Don't be silly. It actually gives me the chance to use my kitchen. But I wouldn't force any you, if you don't like it."I was shocked that She was dissapointment. "Sorry, but we should be leaving now, mam."You know something's not right when your Alpha is being nice towards a vampire.

"Ugh! Finally !"Blondie muttered out of frustration. "You know what Blondie, I'm getting sick of you." Paul snapped at . "Who cares what you think of me? Stupid mutt!"That's it she crossed the line. "What did you just say?" Paul snapped at her and went for thank god for Quill's quick act to hold Paul back and Embry's sense of humor, treaty wasn't broken. Not today though.

"You know, I got to someone who doesn't even recognise her air freshener, you got alot of nerve to pick a fight with us, even if we are on your land."he stressed the last part. "What?"  
"Oh bro! you mean. She was the one on the five o'clock news yesterday?"Jared randomly jumped into the conversation " Yup, that's blonde who had totaled her red BMW M3 in a horrific accident." " What was that Mongrel ?" the bitch didn't back away either. Embry took a step closer to her without any slight hint of fear and said in a low tone " Just admit it, golden retriever." "admit what? that you guys are scared to take on a vampire alone and that's why you always travel in pack" " you were driving alone yesterday when from out of nowhere a tree pops out in even so you are leech you got suprised and swerved right and left untill your car now looks like an accordian that was stomped on by an elephant."Embry counter attack her in same breath. "I thought there no trees in that highway."Jared backed him up "It doesn''s just blondie here was dumb enough to not realise it was just her air freshener swinging back and forth the whole time" the whole pack laughed and not to mention Emmet as well.10 points for the big guy.

"But hey guys, we can't actually blame her for being a was born that way" "oh..oh.. you're killing me here!" Emmet said in short of breath due to laughing for a long time. "Oh that does it!" Rosalie was about to lung and rip Embry apart, but Emmet and the other blonde held her back. "Enough!" Sam's voice erupted the whole mansion. "Embry, you shouldn't have done. We came here in peace for 't try to ruin all of you, get out and stay out there untill i come" Sam commanded, everyone but Sam and I stayed , i feel sorry for my brothers because they had endure so much humiliation and pain because of me. "And as for you, know your limits. Don't ever mess with us again. And by the way, we travel in pack not because we fear but because we value our family and we look after each other."Sam left as soon as he was done . I wonder if Bella understood the meaning because Sam's phrase at the end.

Leaving me and Bells the last person to go out. ", we got to leave now, I'm sure Charlie would be waiting to listen to your long explaination."I said while holding out my hand for her to accept it."Er..Sure." She took a step closer to me but was pulled back when the leech grabbed her by the waist."Edward what are you..?"Bells started but was cut. "I will take her home"the leech told me. "No ... she is coming with me. Back off"I hissed while sent him invisible flying daggers aiming at him." calm down." Bella turned to face me and said "Jake, I'm coming with you." Then turned to face Edward and said "Edward, you just promised you won't make this a big deal?"Really Bells? Really? "I'm sorry love, I just got carried away" he said while kissing Bells forhead, hold on don;t want to break the treaty now do we?.But still I growled at him fiercely for touching what belongs to me. "Good night Edward" "Good night love". Shouldn't that be my line?

As soon as we were out of the bloodsucker's house, I phased and brought bella home as fast as i could. Along the way, I just kept silent , thinking of an excuse to tell charlie but I couldn't quite figure it out but then I heard Sam's thoughts _"Jake what the hell were you thinking just now?have you lost your mind? Do you know what are the consequences that might happen?"_Sam was shouting in my mind. _"Sam,chill. I know what I am doing. I will tell you later but you gotta help me first" "what is it?" "what should I tell charlie now? He is probably waiting for Bella to arrive home any time soon. I don't want her to get in trouble" "Hmm…well that's hard. Does he know she was with him."_Sam asked_" Yeah he does but still she's grounded. Please Sam .."_I begged him._". Fine, tell him you took her to the bonfire, I will try to talk Sue into this. Just in case he checked about this with her. And Jake.. Make it quick.. We need to talk" " Thanks.. I will be there soon."_ I said

[Back at Bella's house]

I already saw Charlie's sillhouette from a distance so I put Bella down and phased. I saw Bella staring at Charlie from the bushes, I could feel her getting intense by the second. "Bells." I called her trying to get her attention."Yes...?" she asked me not really paying attention to me but still managed to turn and face me though. Her left hand caught my attention. Her eyes were on me but her hand was resting on her stomach. What a sight?My love for double in an instant. My hopes and dreams were shattered when she said she chose him over me but It took the most of me when she said she doesn't want the child but I never thought I would get to see this sight after all she said. "Bells... thank you." I said, mere words can't express how I felt for her and our child, I felt happy that she is having my sight is just perfect, in a few months I would be having my child around that moment, it is just going to be the three of baby,Bella and me. I know that she doesn't love me as she does him but with the next 15 months I got in my hand. I'm going to try. I'm going to show Bells that I'm a better man than him. I heard ask "thanks for.." I cutt her off not really wanting to explain to will probably just make her even mad at me. " We better hurry, before Charlie gets mad" "He is already mad, I just don't know what to say to him"She expressed her frustration on the stone she kicked on the ground. "Don't worry about that, I got you covered. Just follow my lead" I said while leaded her to Charlie.

I had a big grin on my face while holding Bells hand tightly, it's all going to work out. "Don't worry Jake" I said to myself."Isabella Marie Swan! You stay right where you are? The same goes for you Jacob"okay... I think I should be worried now. I felt Bella tightened her grip on my hand. "Where have you two been all day long?" "Well... Sir you asked me and talk to bella so I brought her over to the bonfire. Sorry it got a bit late" Charlie's face loosens up a bit when he heard me. "Oh ... okay. But what about before going to the bonfire where have you been bella? Don't try to lie; I know you were with that Edward kid." "Dad, can we talk tomorrow" "No! Not at all, I said we would finish it today and today it is. Now get in the house and Jake thanks for bringing her home safely you may go now."why is he shouting at bells? Can't he see she said she's tired. He asked me to leave which is definately not going to happen. I felt heat rising up in my body, its happening again. Man, I need self control! "Sorry honey" I mentally apologised to Bella and left as quick as I can. I went into the woods to calm myself, cause if I were still there I'm sure I would have phased in front charlie. Oh god, hopefully charlie doesn't scold her too much, maybe I should I talk to Charlie? "Jake?"a voiced interuppted me, I turned to see who it was, and it turns out to be Seth. "what are you doing here?" I asked him. "Well, I just wanted to make sure your're okay and besides I'm on patrol tonight." "Oh.. .." I mouthed, I tottaly forgot about that. "And by the way, your taking tomorrow's morning shift, don't forget" "sure..sure" I said, I was just planning on waking up late. Darn the patrol!

"Oh yeah, I almost forgot. Congrats man!" Seth said with a wide smile on his face. "Thanks"I replied him beaming with the pride of being a soon-to-be-father "So what are you doing here in the middle of the woods, I thought Sam wanted to talk to you." " I'm waiting for you tell Sam I'll be there soon?" " Sure thing, Jake. Bye" "hmm.." was all I could reply to him. I'm very sure Sam is going to rip my head off the second he meets me. But I don't care, even if I'm kicked out of the pack. All that matters now is Bella and the baby. When I realized that I'm running out time, I rushed to Bells room. Sam will be waiting for me so I better make it a quick visit. I know very well not to use the door this time so I went in her room through the window. I heard her talking to herself . "This is so not fair! I can't believe this is happening to me?" she said "Bella?" i think I surprised her.

She flinched."Jacob ...not now..." she said while turning her back at me. As I thought, it was too good to be true. She really doesn't want the baby does she? "Bells. I'm sorry. I didn't think it will come this far. It's ok if you don't want to keep the baby. I won't force you. I will support your decision no matter what it is. I have your back bells." "Oh Jake... it's not about the baby. It's Charlie." "What about him?" I asked, taking a seat next to her. "Well, he thinks I'm acting like a kid and so he wants to punish me by sending me back to Jacksonville" she said in anger. "What? Bells don't worry; I will try to figure out way to calm down Charlie. For now, you better go to sleep. You need all the rest you can get, I will come over around noon."I got up and started heading towards the window but stopped when i heard her rasing her voice

"Noon? Charlie is sending me back tomorrow morning Jake!" I was silent for awhile then I turned to face bells and asked "Bells have you told Charlie about the baby?" "Of course not Jake, what do you expect me to say? Hey dad, wanna know something I just found out I'm pregnant with my best friend's child." She said sarcastically. Best friend? That's all I will ever be? The position I have in her heart is being a best friend? "Jake... I'm...sor" "its ok bells, I understand." I said trying to put a smile on my face.

"No Jake, I didn't mean it that way. It's just that, a lot had happen in these few days and I just can't cope up with things." "Yeah... a lot had " I said while cupping Bells face in my hand, holding her close to me. No. I'm not going to give up now! I have made myself a promise and I'm going to keep it. I still have 15 months, I'm sure I can manage it."We're a pretty messed-up pair, aren't we? Neither one of us can hold our shape together right?" "Not really Jake" she said while looking at me in the eye,I was hoping that she could understand my feelings for her. Bella continued."I can't say that for all i know is that, you will always be there when I need you, and that makes me stronger. I'm sure we could get through this together."She said and noticed that there was only a few inches that was between us. I waited for it, but it seems she doesn't feel the same way as she says.

"I'm sorry.. I did it again didn't i?" I asked her about trying to bring our relatinship stronger. "No. It's ok. The only thing in my mind now is Charlie. Jake I don't want to leave... I don't want to leave you, Edward or any of them..." her voiced croaked. Oh god, Is she crying? Ooh bells honey. I jumped on to the bed and pulled her close to me, I hugged her from behind. I whispered "... don't cry...I'm here. I'm sure we can go through this together." I said trying to comfort her, her cries got slower but it didn't stop though. "Jake." I heard her call out for me. "Jake please don't leave me, I don't think I can go through 15 months without you. Don't make me go through the same thing he did"as I heard that, I nuzzled against her the crrok of her neck and blew softly against her cheekc trying to tickle her and it worked. It always does.I always do that back when we were young to make her stop crying. "Bella, I promise you. I won't leave... I won't leave you alone. I promise you." I said while kissing her cheek which made her blush madly. She looks pretty when she blushes.

Then I laughed and spaced a bit from her when I saw her blushing even more when she noticed how our position was just now. "Oh, how i miseed your blush" i said and continued laughing. I saw her trying to change the subject. "How can you be smiling, Jake? How am I supposed to stop Charlie from sending me back tomorrow?" She is still worried about it. "Don't worry Bells, I got all figured out. You just need to do exactly what I say." I said and with i told her my plan "Bells it's getting late get some sleep. I will try my best to come as soon as possible tomorrow ok? Just do as I say and I'm sure you will be fine." i reassured her and then left through her window to meet Sam.

I got down from Bells room as quietly as I can and I manage to avoid charlie. I was about to phase when I heard something behind me. "Stop where you are! I told you not see Bella anymore. Haven't I made myself clear?" Isn't that Charlie? When was that law enfored? " But sir you haven't told me anything about that?"I said while turned to look at him. " Oh ..its you jake. I thought it was that Edward kis but wait why are you coming from Bella's room?"And he sideswipes with his own question." Well sir, Bells told me that you are sending her away. Is it true?" "I'm afraid, it is I know Bells hurted you but don't worry I'm sure Jacksonville will teach her a life lesson for good" he said while looking at me. I kept silent, little does he knows that his daughter is actually carrying my child. I'm the one who should sent away. " But sir, you couldn't ..I mean,you musn't" "And why is that?" " because.. I love her. Look I know I might not be as rich as that Edward kid, or as perfect as him but I am trying my best here. I'm trying to be what Bella wants and sir if Bella leaves there won't be any reason for me to stay here anymore as well" I said with pleading eyes and kinda somewhat a threating him too. I know Charlie thinks me as his son and that he doesn't want to hurt my dad as 's like killing two birds with one stone. Aren't I the smart one? " hmm.. you ..ugh.. fine. But as long she's away from the Edward kid. I'm good." "Don't worry sir, I'll make sure that he doesn't even get near her"

[ after talking with charlie]

I phased went to meet Sam but he was already halfway getting to where i am

_"what took you so long?"_ he asked

" _well, I had a little talk with Charlie"_

_"does he know?"_

_"no.. not at all"_

"_hmm.. now back to the point. what the hell was that at the cullen's house?"_

_"Sam listen, you need Emily just as much I need Bella or even more because she is having my baby. And I can't afford to loose her even if it means risking my own life."_

_"But Jake. You must be aware that it might endanger the baby or Bella"_ he said with a worried look.

_" I know, thats why I will be with her all the time. I know with me around. Bells won't go far. So see its all clear." _ I said but sam didn't seem happy 

_"But still I'm kinda worried since Bella isn't one of us this is going to be really tough for her. Stay with her as much possible, I will try to arrange the patrols for you ok?"_

_"ok. And Sam?"_

"_yeah? "_

_"Did you remeber just now back at the cullens mansion, the pix.." _

"_the one being excited to be an aunt?" "_

_. what did she mean by that?"_

"_i'm not sure, i was troubled by that too. I'm try to find out untill then, just be careful around them. Okay?"_

_"sure."_

"_By the way, don't forget I arranged an appointment for you and bells with sure tomorrow."_


	17. Chapter 17 a new beginning

Disclaimer: no, I don't own twilight and yes I hate Edward.**  
**All hail Jacob! Team Jacob all the way!

**This chapter is dedicated to jacobfan216, connect2tjb, goldengirl62, smallfrykukie and to all Jacob fans and also j/b fans. Everyone who reads this story pls.. pls.. review. It makes me sad to see that I get such few reviews. Pls review, I look forward to your reviews everyday pls make my day happy. It's just simple..just review tell me your opinion cause I really really need it so that I know you like or don't like my story. **

Because he's a part of her, and there is no changing that now.

(Derived from "Eclipse" quote: "Jacob had become a part of me, and there is no changing that now)

Bella's pov

Dark clouds took control over the sky only leaving a slight glimpse of the moon to shine over the land. I found myself in a very dark ground was moist as if it has just been showered by the dark clouds. I was lying on the ground. I got up on my elbow, to identify my surrounding. Even though, the moon only shine over a certain part of the place, I was fortunate enough to see pine trees and crumpled leaves all around me. I couldn't recognize the place at all, at first. But as iI ventured further with the courage given by the moon, I managed to arrive at a place I was familiar. It was the woods, the exact place where Edward left me. I tried moved around eventhough I didn't want to, because it brings back memories from the as stubborn as my nature is, I kept on moving forward untill I came across a dark tall shadow waiting for me.

My legs kept on moving towards the danger although my instints tells me, I shouldn't. Afterall, I am Bella the Danger Magnet. I know i should run away from it, but my body chose to dissobey my order. The image of the shadow was beginning to be clearer. My heart was racing and my mind rang the alert button. But everything stopped, even the beating of my heart. My breath hitched when I saw a pair of golden eyes staring back at mine hazel ones. I knew very well who it belongs to.

It was same flawless Greek god that i fell inlove with. He looked as if he was angel sent from up above when the moon shined above his skin making it sparkle,he was so..perfect. "Edward" I called him when I caught him staring at me looking so innocent. He came closer and hugged me. I didn't move neither did he. We didn't talk just stayed like that for a long time, I didn't want to let this go. It felt so nice as if we were meant to be together. Within him I found happiness,fulfillment and flawless beauty. I was admiring his beauty and enjoying the moment untill...

"Bells?" I heard someone whisper my name. I turned to find no one there but, my eyes were fixed on the bushes near by for some reason. As if someone was there, my instincts again guides me. Tells me to go there but yet again I refuse to listen to it, instead I "Who is there?" I asked waiting for an answer, as if I am sure there is something there. And to my suprise, there was sudden movements around the bushes, I watched carefully. Waiting..

No more than a few minutes, what i had expected came true. I saw something came out of the dark, revealing itself. I was surprises to see it was Jacob. "Jake?" I asked him disbelief, while half running towards him to give him a hug. As I went closer to him, I saw his facial expression. It was bitter, his eyes were bloodshot red and leaked with written all over his handsome face.I came to halt stopped and stood in front of him. But still manage to leave some space between us. Because I wasn't so sure that the man infront of me is really my Jacob. I stood there in front of him and stared at him. The cold air sang around him, silence slowly ate his surrounding, leaving the sigh of his loneliness shooting air out of his mouth with each breathe he exhales. He stared back at slowly casted his gaze down. Down, he stared in his arms. That's when I noticed him cradling something in his arm. It wasn't moving nor making any noise.

I felt Edward's grip on me tightened all of sudden" Jake. whats that?" I asked. He just shook his head, and stared at the thing he was cradling. What could it be? I was curious, so I took a step a closer, it was bundle. Curiousity caught me, it drove me closer to Jacob. the more I step forward, the clearer the bundle came into my view. It was an infant, I was shocked. My body was shaking was it out fear or shock? I took a deep breathe and try to put the pieces together. Jake having an infant in his arms? What is this suppose to mean? As hard as I try to solve the puzzle. I realise, that isn't any missing pieces to find or any mystery to solve. Everything points to onlyone thing but that couldn't right? Its not true! It musn't be true! I tried to escape from Edward's grip, to see for myself.

To prove myself that it wasn't true."Let me go Edward" I said with more force than I intended to while tried to free myself from him. "No.. Bella. Don't go!" "Edward let me go, I need to see it. I think it's my baby" I shouted my thoughts out loud while strungle to break free from Edward's strong grip "Love, it's not our's. It's not even alive." " Edward let me go!" I shouted while kicked his leg, with that he let me escape. I went near Jake, I saw the infant. It was wrapped in a white blanket and was held close by Jake as if he doesn't want to let it go. But I was lucky enough get to see a glimpse of it, it has raven hair, but skin is a little tad darker than mine but still I wasn't able to look into it's eyes as it was close. The infant glowed in the moon light, I held out my hand trying to touch it, Jake saw my request wanting to touch it. He gave me the infant in my arms, I caressed it's cheek with my hand. It's skin was warm just like Jake's and soft to the touch of mine. But It wasn't breathing, I tried to hear it's heart beat but nothing was heard. "He's gone. Gone. How could you?" Jake asked to me, his voiced croaked.

I shifted my eyes too look at him, I saw him staring at the infant in my arms, a drop of tear rolled down his cheek, he quickly wiped it off. "Jake, what do you mean?" I asked him. but before he could answer me, he was pushed to the ground with Edward on top of him. "Jake!" I shouted. But neither one of them responded to me, I saw them fighting. Jacob phased in an instant after he was pushed down. Both he and Edward rolled on top each other while they fought. I saw Edward pushing and hitting Jacob with all his strength while Jake bite Edward's right arm. I couldn't bare to witness it, two of the most important people in my life was fighting till death in front of of very eyes.I heard a loud scream coming from Jake, i saw Edward biting Jake. I scream on top of my lungs when I saw this "Jake!" but none of them responded to me again. it was as if I was never there. Then I felt my body being shaked viciously.

"Bella! Bella!" "huh?" "Oh god Bells, you got me worried there for a second" Charlie said while hugging me. "What happened? Dad, what are you doing here? Where am i?" I said all in the same breath. " I heard you screaming. I got here as fast as I can. This is your room"he said. Oh,I get it. It was just a dream but it felt so real. What does it mean? "Bells? Are you ok?" "yeah, I guess so. dad." " I'm guessing it must have been a hell of nightmare. Just forget about it, its just a dream. Now why don't you get showered and I'll make you breakfast" I just nodded in reply, I wasn't still shaken off from the nightmare yet.

I got into the bathroom and turned on the actuality, I wasn't really bathing. I can't stop myself from looking at the mirror. Maybe I'm hoping, that the nightmare would appear in mirror before my every eyes so that I get to watch it then, I just sort of end up hypnotized by the drumming of the water against my skin. I can't think of anything else. It must mean something and I realise i need to take charge of myself now before Charlie comes looking for me again. So I changed and went down. I saw Charlie reading the news paper and on my plate was scramble eggs and bacon. I didn't eat much, I was staring outside at the woods thinking about the dream again.

"Bells, are you ok? You're acting strange today"

"Bells?"

"Bells…?"

"huh? What?" I asked when I was pulled back to reality by Charlie. "Bells.. is everything ok?"He tried to sound concern. " Its . I'm Fine" " Bells. There is something bothering your mind right now.I have been calling from just now! what's wrongs Bella? if you're angry about me forcing you to go to Jacksonville, then don't be. I'm not sending you there but please don't show your anger towards the food. It did nothing" Charlie said, while staring me. ooh ok.. wait what? " Dad.." I called him.

"Yes. Bells? Is there anything you want to talk about?" ok.. he is serious bu why the sudden change? " Dad,What happend? what's with the sudden change of plan?" He looked at in disbelief "Don't tell me you want to go?" "No! its not that. I was just since yesterday, you were so eager to chase me out of the house, why the sudden change?"ok that was came out abit rude but still it was the truth.

"Bells. Chase is not the right word. It's not that I want you to go but I thought it would be best for you to stay away from forks for a while, I don't want you to get hurt much more. But it turns out I was wrong, your presence here doesn't affect only me, it affects a lot of people who love you and I can't send my girl away. I just can't" he said ever so caring. A lot of people ? the Cullen's ? " aww.. dad.i love you" I said while hugged Charlie "I love you too, Bells" he said returning the hug. "I better be going now" he said while getting his coat and went out.

As soon as I heard Charlie left, I start doing the dishes and cleaned the house. I was in no mood to watch tv so I went upstairs and lied on my bed. I tried to think something else but the dream. I was realised I was failed miserably when patches of the dream came to my mind. Was that really my baby ? What did Jake meant by "how could you?" Exactly, what did I do? I don't know why. But I have a feeling that this dream isn't like the ones I have been having before. I felt my eye lids getting heavier and soon I fell into a deep slumber.

Everything was blank, nothing but just a white space. A never ending white space, but I just kept walking and walking until I came back to the place. I was back in the woods, every single detail that happened in my previous dream was replayed in front of me. I saw Edward hugging me, Jake and the baby and their fight. I started screaming out my mind, it's all hurts too much. I don't want to see them fight and get hurt because me.

"Bells..honey, wake up" I heard a familiar voice, I tried to open my eyes. It took me a minute longer, but I succeeded. The first thing I saw was a pair of brown eyes looking back at me; it was Jacob. Oh how I missed him." you ok?" Aacob asked me while caressing my cheek, he looked worried. "Oh Jake" I hugged him, I held him close to me not wanting to let him go.I was scared that if I might let go off might fade away. He didn't return the hug but I still clinged on him. then I felt his arms around me, it felt warm not like Edward's.

"oh ..Jake I missed you.." I whispered to him desperately. I felt my eyes began to shed tears of fear. The fear of losing my best friend, my jake. The image of Jake being bitten by Edward just horrors me, I don't want it to come true.I don't know why but i feel as if I need him more so than my ownself. I don't want show him my tears, so I pressed my face against his chest. "I missed you too" he said while hugged me tighter. "Bells." he called me.

"Bells.?" He called out again because I didn't answer him before and am planning not to do so now as well.I don't want him to see me cry, i don't want hi to see me in this state. "Bells.. honey. Look at me." he ordered but I didn't move an inch. "Bella, please look at me." he pleaded while his hand raised my chin and I give in. I look him in the eye, the same eyes as the infant had. "Bella..honey why are you crying?" he asked while wiping my tears away.

"Bells, tell me what happened? did charlie say something?" " no.. its not him." I said softly. " It's the leech isn't it? oh he's going down this time" Jacob said missunderstanding the whole situation. I can sense anger in his tone. He didn't waste anytime and started going towards the... god!no! I rushed towards jake and hugged from behind. No.. the dream is coming true. No, it musn't! "Jake don't leave me. please.." I trailed off" I need you" I said while pressing face on his back. I tried to hold myself from breaking down but I just can't.

I started sobbing again. "Bells. Don't cry." by now he turned and faced me, face to face. But I didn't look at him in the eyes, but felt a pair of arms wrapped around me. "Bells.. stop crying. See I'm here I'm not going anywhere ok?" I just nodded in reply. "Wanna go downstairs?" he asked me with a worrid face. "sure.."

[downstairs at the couch with jakey]

"So bells, how did it go with charlie?" he asked while sipping his hot chocolate. "Erm.. well.. it kinda surprised me" "Really. and why is that?" he asked without actually looking at me. "Charlie sounded really mad at me yesterday, so I thought we would argue about this but then he just agreed. Well not really agreed, he sort of begged me not go " "eh, that's good. But Erm.. Bells" I saw him fidgeting his fingers "

"did you..well.. tell charlie about ..the .." he stopped trying to say something but nothing came out of his mouth but I could preety much figure it out. "You mean the baby?" I asked trying to tease him. "hmm.. well..Yeah.. did you?" " yet.. I don't think Charlie could handle it well. I'll tell him later but not now or for a few days."I said while trying to imagine charlie's reaction if he found out that I am having Jake's child "do you wanna talk about it?" "hmm.. About what?" I asked. "Well, about just now. I was knocking your door for awhile but you didn't respond so I came through your window and you were shouting" no.. no.. I am not telling him about the dream.

"Its just a nightmare, I have been having it a lot lately" I lied. "When is your patrol for today?"I asked him trying to change the topic . "I just finished it just now that's why I was late." He said with his famous Jacob grin on his face while scartching the back of his head. "oh, ok so. You're free now?" I asked him. Hoping that we could go to the beach. I don't know why but I just felt like going there. "erm.. yeah sorta" "so can we go to the beach?"

" erm.. well bells. Well I kinda have plans, sorry" bummer. "Ooh never mind, I could always have alice to come over" I said trying to cover up my disappointment. "what? No. Bella. We have agreed only twice a month and besides we are going out now" he shouted. What is he thinking? I'm not his servant to obey his every order. But I was distracted when he said we are going? I thought he said he has plans. Did he just lied to me? "Jake, I thought you said you have plans?" "well, yeah. Sam arranged an appointment for you to visit Sue.

And if we don't go now, we would be late." "what! without asking me first?" I raised my voice "Bells can we just talk on the way there?" "no! now it is. Don't you try to get away from this!" I said with anger spat into my words. "I am not trying to get away from this. I'm just trying to get us there on time for the appointment. We should be there on time since it's the first appointment" he said so made me feel stupid. "Fine" I muttered and went up stairs to change. I almost fell down the stairs when I was on my way god, Jake was in time there to catch me before I fell. "Geez Bells, you should be more careful next time, you are carrying a child now" he said "I know that!" I shouted while headed towards my truck.

I got in and sat there and waited for jake to come. Why does he always how to be right and I'm wrong? It's not like I want to fall down on purpose. I was brought back to reality when I heard jacob say "Bells, why don't we use my car?" he said while pointing at his rabbit. I shouted at him " No ! we are going using my truck or I'm not going!" I said while crossing my hands against my stomach.i felt like as if I was a 5year-old, suddnely throwing tantrum.I blame the preganancy hormone. Jacob sighed and got in the truck, and we were on our way to the hospital. None of us spoke until we arrived at the hospital, that's when I got really nervous. "Bells, you should go and sit there while I register " Jake said and went to the receptionist.

While I sat at the waiting area, It's been ages I think since Jake left me. My eyes started searching for Jacob and I found him still talking to the receptionist well actually she was flirting with him. What? Is he flirting behind my back? I got up and went to Jake's side. "honey.. what's taking so long?" I complained to Jake while sliding my hand into his. I saw jake's surprised face started talking "well..." I was really concertrating at him, since I was busy sending invisible flying daggers towards the receptionist.

" You can go now Mr black, Sue would be waiting for you now at her room. sorry for the wait mam." She said not looking at me in the eye. Jake and I started walking towards Sue's room, when all of the sudden " Jealous are we?" jake asked me while rasing an eyebrow, teasing me. "No. Not at all. I just don't like waiting too long" I said while trying make my steps faster trying to avoid more questions from Jake. But was I really jealous? Well.. maybe but that doesn't make any difference does it?

[ inside sue clearwater's room]

I walked inside first and saw Sue holding up some documents. She looked at us when she heard the door shut as Jake came in the room. "Oh, Bella nice to see you sweety" she said while hugged me. "Yeah, its been awhile Sue." "Bella..Jake please take a seat" Sue said while pointing at the seats in front of her desk. " So how are you doing bella? Sam told me about the news. I can't believe, the small little girl that I knew is going to have a child of her own" she said . for a second there she sounded like Renee. "Well.. so far so good" "have you been having morning sickness?" "no.." I said while shaking my head. "well.. you will soon dear, Carlisle gave me all the details yesterday. Well morning sickness will be at your doorstep about next month so you still have a a lot time." Am I suppose to glad ?

"Come let me check your heart beat" I lend her my hand. "hmm.. It seems fine" She said after checking, "But your body temperature isn't stable which kinda worries me but I think it will be fine." She said while smiling." Bella could you follow me" she invited me in to a another room there she examined me then I came back to the previous room. I saw Jake, staring at the photo that was hanging on the ceiling, the photo was a baby girl. I just smiled at the thought of jake playing with a small girl with pig tails.

"emm. Everything seems fine to me" Sue said while looking at the results of the examination. " Can we leave now?" Jake asked. " Yes but I do have some advice for both of you" "me?" Jake asked in disbelief , while standing in front the door, he was so eager to get out the room . "Yes,you. Now sit " sue ordered and Jacob obeyed. "Well as both of you know, it will be another 14 months plus untill the baby arrives and I would want both of you to come for the appointment once a month. Bella your eating habit must not be containing any spicy food since your body temperature isn't stable. You should be expecting your morning sickness around next month and your mood swings the following week or so."

"oh that came early I'm afraid" Jake said while I elbowed him in the stomach which caused him to groan loud. "Bella, remember only twice a month not more or it will endanger you and your baby." She said stressing it. I just sighed "And Jake I advise you to be with her as much as possible, since her body temperature isn't stable which kinda worries me."

"What must I do?" Jake asked "Well, for starters make sure she is always warm since Bella isn't of quilette blood it would be difficult for the baby to adjust to the mother's body i guess that's all, I'll be waiting too meet you again the next appointment" she said while smiling. "Finally" jake said while stretching his hands out and went out of the room.

" you do me a favour?" "yes dear." "please don't tell charlie about this?" " when are you planning to tell him?" she asked " well later." I said while leaving the room "The sooner the better dear " I heard Sue's voice reminding me as I went out the door. Man.. I am soo tired.i felt as if my whole body is aching. I tried to search for Jake but he was no where in sight. "Jake" I called out. Still no response.

"Jake.. where are you?" I shouted in the parking lot. I was shaking out of is he? "hey..hey I'm here.." he said while hugging me from behind. "Don't do that again. You scared me to death" I shouted at him not caring if anyone was watching us. "hey.. chill.. I just got us some food" he said while handing me a cup cake " thanks" I said while eating. "Wanna go to the beach?" I heard jake asked.


	18. Chapter 18 sweethearts

**Disclaimer: no, I don't own twilight and yes I hate Edward...**

**All hail Jacob ! Team Jacob all the way...**

**This chapter is dedicated to jacobfan216, connect2tjb and goldengirl62. **

Bella's pov

After 8 months continues from **chapter: new begining**….

"Jake.." I called him softly. "Coming .. You sure are eating alot these days" he muttered. "Much than I do." He continued while bringing me the pineapple ice cream that I requested him. Lately for the past few weeks, I have been cravings for sweet things and according to Sue's theory the baby might be a girl based on my Jake insits that we are having a son. "here" Jake passed me the tray. "thanks." I said, smiling broadly. He just shooked his head and sat down beside me. I felt his hand snaked around my waist and pulled me closer to him. Jake's relationship with me has grown closer since that day. I started recalling what happened that day.

[flashback continues from chapter new beginning ..]

"Wanna go to the beach?" Jake asked, I just nodded in reply. I could feel a wide grin across my face as we walked towards the car while holding hands. Along the drive to the beach, Jake seemed to be in his own world. " Jake, could we stop by at the shop? I got some things to buy" I said while looking outside at the woods, enjoying the view along La Push. I waited for his reply but nothing was heard. I glanced at him, he was like a statue. Staring straight at the road, as if nothing else exist. So unlike Jacob.

"Jake.." I called him. no reply. "Jake" I called him agin but this time shaking his arm. "huh.. what?" he snapped out. "Jake. Is something bothering you?" he's never acted like this before so it's kinda strange. "No!I mean no. what makes you say that?" he snapped at me. "Well for your information, you were day dreaming while driving that's why" "Sorry bells" he said. I saw his gaze dropped when I said that. " I'm sorry bells…" he started while pressing the palm of my hand in his hands. "I just can't believe all these happened in a very short time" "I know, but we are going to go through this together right?" I asked him, I need him untill this is over after that it will be normal. I can be back with Edward and Jacob can his own life. Everything will be just as it was. He turned his gaze at me and smiled. " Of course bells". I leaned my head on his shoulder and moved closer to him. I don't know why but whenever I'm with him now days something something inside me feels warm.

The rest of drive was quiet but it seems so right. Soon we arrived at the beach, we sat at our usual spot. We had a short talk, I was siting on Jake's lap with his arms wrapped around me. " the view is great right ?" Jake aske breaking the silence first, starting a conversation that is. "hmm.. yeah, we should come here more often" I suggested while looking at him. "If you say so." he shimmed while smiling away. " Bells.." "yeah..?" I said while looking up at him. " what happened this morning?" he asked. morning? about charlie? "Nothing..I was just talking with charlie. Why do you ask?" I was curious now. " No, I meant something else, other than the usual?" he asked again, stressing his I was lost. Other than the usual? I'm a danger magnet, so most of it is usual.

"What do you mean?" I asked him again "why were you screaming, when I arrived?"He just has to ruin the mood. "Oh.. It was nothing " "Bells." he said in a sharper tone. "What?" I snapped at him. " Tell me the truth. Don't I deserve to know?" he asked while staring at me. He is making this hard. "Fine. you wanna just a stupid dream. happy?" "A dream? what was it about?" he asked. " Its just something stupid. Now can we talk about something else?" I said trying to change the topic.

"Is it about us?"he remained fascinated. " Well yes and no" does that word even exist? "What is it?"he asked yet again. "Nothing" I replied sternly. " So, what you are trying to say is, something about us is stupid? It's nothing?" he said while raising his voice bit by bit. "Jake I didn't mean it..tha..wa.." I was cut short. "No Bells.. that's what you were trying to say wasn't it? How about this? Does this mean nothing to you also?" he asked while laying his hand on my stomach.

I felt my cheeks getting warm, how dare he say that? " NO! of course not! How dare you? You know this baby is my life now. It's a part of me and you as well." Poked him in the chest and continued "so don't you say something like that to me, ever again. Understand ?" I shouted at him, by now I was standing facing him. He toweredme when he stood there with his mouth open in a O shape. Wow guess he didn't expect that? But still i'm bothered by his acusation.

"Since you are so eager to know, it is about us. You, me and Edward" he growled when I mentioned Edward's name but I ignored him and continued " You were holding a lifeless baby, you were blaming me for its death. Edward got angry and fought with you." I said almost crying thinking about the images of my dead baby. I closed my face with hands, I don't want him to see me crying. That's when I felt a pair of arms wrapping me holding me close, my face hit something hard and warm.

"I'm sorry bells" he whispered. "I was about loose you" I said while crying against his chest. "shhs.. bells.. its OK. See I'm alright. I won't let any of it happen to us. Not as long as I'm alive." He said while caressing my hair. "Promise?" I said while look up at childish as i might sound but wanted that bit of assurance. "I promise you with my life bells." He said looking at me straight in the eyes. I just smiled in reply, I was about to say something but was stopped when I saw that.

The famous 'Jacob grin', it was actually the first thing that got me attracted to him. I remembered it very well, he had the same grin on his face back that day, the first time we met. It was when Charlie introduce me to Jacob after a long time. I am so glad to see him smiling again. I haven't seen him do that in a while, I kinda missed it. This time, he kept that grin longer than usual on his face, it some how gave me the feeling as if he knows something that I didn't. I felt his warm slender finger's caressing my cheek, he lifted my chin making me look at him. Our nose were almost touching. Chills run down my spine when I felt the warmth of his breath brushing the top of my lips. I was so captured in his brown eyes; the very same one that the infant had.. soft yet strong. But in jacob's eye it held something special. Something out of the ordinary, was it lust? Could it be love?

I frozed, when I felt warm tingly feeling against my lips, I opened my eyes and looked and him. his lips against mine. I didn't realize he leaned into me, I felt his fingers around my cheek slightly pushing me towards him. I gave in and pressed my lips against his deeper. Our lips parted, i looked at him. He was having a broad smile on his face, like he accomplished something. I was flushed, what have I done? Why is my heart pounding this fast? I was carried in the trail of thoughts until I felt his lips against me again. It wasn't like any of the kisses I had before, it was soft, warm, comforting. I felt a string pulling me closer to him, it was as if we were one.

For a minute I tried to pull away from him, to separate myself from the pull. I knew it wasn't my imagination that my need for him was stronger than ever. I saw him, my Jacob. No longer my childhood friend, he's my best friend who is the father of my unborn child. The love I held for him, was not the same as I held for Edward but.. Now I felt like Jacob is my everything. I felt tiny lines connect me and Jacob together, it was something strong, not love, not lust, not care but something even stronger. I felt his tongue against mine, it was colliding. I closed my eyes and lived the moment, it was perfect. Both of us kissing with the sunset ray hitting us gently, nothing felt weird just pure feelings.

It all stopped when he pulled back and stared at me, this time his gaze was on my stomach. He stared at it long. his hand reached towards it, his fingers outstretched trying to touch it but he stopped when he saw me staring at him. He stared at my face and then turned to the other side gazing at the sunset, I saw disappointment across his face. I held out my hand to grabbed his and placed his hand against my stomach with my hand on top of his. I felt warm both inside and outside of me, I felt butterflies flying in stomach. I didn't notice it untill now that Jake's presence and his actions affects the baby. When ever he's around, my body becomes warm and I felt safe; like nothing else matters except us.

I felt his gaze on me, so I looked at him; he smiled at me while rubbing his hands against my stomach. He mouthed "thank you" I rested my head on his shoulder in reply while playing his finger's which were against my stomach. I felt a light kiss on my forehead, which made me look upon him. he still had the same smile, this time I leaned towards him. It was all so perfect except the part because of my eagerness made both of our noses hit.

I was embarrassed to even look at him, it was suppose to be a perfect kiss but my clumsiness just has to ruined it. I sighed still looking down until I heard Jacob laugh. So bad!how can he laugh at me? " hey…" he said. I looked at him, still silent. "Wanna try it again?" he said while pulling my hips closer to him. He closed the gap between us, I was still kinda embarrasses from just now. can I do it? I was wondering to myself until I felt his nose against me. I heard him whisper "I'm waiting.." that actually motivated me to bold up, I tip toed and pushed myself against him. I succeed this time, I was still embrassed and scared that he might laugh but it was actually more than okay. Soft, slow and full of emotion. He moved his lips from my mouth to my cheeks and kissed it.

[end of flashback]

I leaned against his shoulder while still eating my ice cream " Jake" "yeah bells." he said while nodding his head " I love you" I said with a long inhale. He smiled while looking at me and said "I love you too, honey."we stayed like that for awhile, just watching tv and cuddling. It was all we did for the past few weeks, it some how brought us closer. after finish eating the ice cream, I went to the kitchen to the dishes. That when I saw it. "ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh" I screamed on top my lungs, "Bella!" I heard Jacob said while rushing to me. " What ? what happened? Are you OK?" he said in a concerned tone. " I just pointed at the wall. He followed my gaze at the wall. " What is it?" he asked me. Is he blind?

"Jake ! Can't you see we are late" I shouted at him. " Late? For what?" is he joking. "Jake! Don't play around go and get dressed we need hurry or we will be late?" I rushed him while pushing his back from behind. " Bells. Calm why are we late? Should we be somewhere?" "Jacob black! I never thought you would be so irresponsible. We should be at the Cullens in 20 minutes. You forgot?" I shouted at him while getting up the stairs to get dressed. "But.. Bells" I cut him short. "No get your butt up here and get dressed."

We were ready in 10 minutes, and was on our way to the Cullens. I was so excited like a five-year old on Christmas morning. "Bells, do we have to?" Jake was still whining from just now. I know he doesn't like being there but he was the one suggest that he should be with me when I want to visit there. "Well bright one, you should have thought of the consequences before you suggested it the other day" I said while folded my arms across my stomach. Jake gave a look and then said "Well.. I didn't know it will be this bad" he muttered under his breathe.

"Oh Jake, don't be such a baby, its not that bad." " Yeah..Not bad. I was about the break the treaty the last time we visited them." " well who ask you to be so over protective?" I said rolling my eyes " Well, sorry for taking care of you and the baby." Jake snapped. I just sighed in reply. " I swear bells if he tries to put his arms around you today, I'm going to kill him. Treaty or no treaty" " Jake calm down, you were having fun there, on our last visit you were practically goofing around with Emmet you did say so yourself that Esme's cooking was good" he turned at me at an instant "Well, Emmet was OK and yeah the food was , Hell No! I was not enjoying myself except the part getting the blonde mad. Bells do you seriously think that a werewolf would like to be in a house full of leeches" I slapped him in the hand and said "hey" "Oh,ok sorry seriously what's the differences between a vampire and a leech?" "Well vampires is a much polite term" I said. "sure..sure" he shrugged.

[at the cullens]

Before we could even get into the house, Alice came running outside and hugged me. "Bella..Bella you don't know how much I missed you" Alice said while hugging me tight. "Alice.. too tight" I said trying to breathe. "Oh sorry, I guess I was just too excited seeing you since its been awhile" Alice like always. "OK..ladies enough with the whole chit chat, Bells lets get going" Jake said interrupting us. "Jacob.. nice to see you again" Alice said trying to nice to him. " Sure..sure"he waved while headed towards Emmet "don't mind him" I said to him. "I'll try" Alice said with a sneaky smile.

I went into kitchen but no one was so I went to the dining to find them but I found something else. The long dining table was actually piled with was as if it was a feast. A feast for a king to be correct but if the the pack was here then it would be a normal dinner for bunch of teenage boys. My thoughts were interrupted when I heard Jacob growl. oh god! what happened now? i rushed to the living room and found Rosalie a few few metres away from both Jacob and Emmet. "ergh.." i heard Jacob growl again. Oh god. Not again. Jake don't phase here. "Calm down man.. calm down" Emmet said while patting Jake's shoulder. If this goes on Jacob would definately break the treaty. I rushed to Jake's side and placed my hand on the side of his cheeks and said " Jake.. calm down" he was still glaring at Rosalie.

"Hun.. listen to me please." i pleaded him. did i just say that? that was totally pure random. Jake turned and faced me in an instant with a bright smile across his face. I felt my blood rushed to my cheeks, i must be blushing hard now. I turned away from Jacob's view and stared at the floor. I was so embarrassed. I heard Jake let a long inhale and then said "Hey Rosalie, do you know how to drown blond?" did i just hear that right? Rosalie? well this is the first time i heard him call Rosalie by her name. it was usually bloodsucker or Blondie. big improvement. "Stupid mutt" Rosalie said while marching into the kitchen. " i dont" Emmet chimed while trying to hold back his laughter. " Just simple, just Glue a mirror to the bottom of a pool." Making sure his voice was enough for Rosalie to hear.

I heard laughter coming from both Jake and Emmet. what the hell are they thinking? Are they trying to get murdered by Rosalie? Boys, no matter how old they are, they don't change do they? Boys will be boys was what i thinking as I made my way to the kitchen again but ... I stopped when I felt a gust of wind passed by me. A few minutes later, " I missed you" I heard someone whisper into my ear.


	19. Chapter19 A cHANge IN tImE

**Disclamer: I don't own twilight and yes I hate Edward**

**This chapter is dedicated to jacobfan216, connect2tjb, goldengirl62, Kiara-sun, Nutz for Kellan Lutz, Jacoblover16, luvinJ, TweetyCanary, spikeblack79 and Renas Asylum. **

**Jacob's POV of chapter: Sweethearts**

"Jake!" I heard Bells voice from the living room.

"Coming Bells! Geez, you sure are eating a lot these days." I muttered. "Much more than I do." I continued, while bringing her pineapple ice cream.

A lot had changed in these past few weeks, Bells started having these strange craving for sweet things. Since thenI have became a regular customer at the grocery store, because she keeps demanding different things.

First it was ice cream, then cake, and then it was cookies. She was driving me nuts. Although to be honest, it wasn't completely a bad thing. Sue explained to us that all these cravings indicated that we are going to have a girl. Could you imagine a mini Bella running around the house? Hopefully, she wouldn't be as clumsy as Bells, although that wouldn't be a bad thing since that was one of the reasons why I fell for her. But at the same time, I can't deny the fact that my fatherly instinct tells me that we are having a boy. I know it's strange but that's just the fact.

"Here," I said as I passed her the tray.

"Thanks," she replied smiling broadly up towards me.

I shook my head and sat down beside her. I snaked my hand around her waist and pulled her closer to me. My heart started to flutter and my stomach began to do flips when I realized that Bella's belly is finally showing. I cwear, I could feel a slight baby bump whenever my hand comes in contact with her belly.

My life is now full of surprises, the other day I was on my way to kill that red hair leech and now I'm here with the two most important people in life. My relationship with Bella was going well; We actually began to spend more time together. The other day at the beach, I saw her looking directly into my eyes. The look she gave me was different than the ones she had ever given me before. It was as if she had seen me for the very first time. I felt the strings again, the very same ones that I felt when I first imprinted on her.

But the strings were thicker and stronger this time and I knew what it meant. From that moment on, I knew my life wasn't going to be the same again . The reasons for my living would be, to be there for my significant other and our precious one. I knew then, I wasn't going to be same 17 years old Jacob Black anymore, I have major responsibilities now, I have a lot on my shoulders.

The conversation in my mind was interrupted when I heard Bells call me "Jake?"

While nodding my head I replied, "Yeah Bells."

Bella took a deep breath and I felt her hands tighten over mine as they rested on her stomach "I love you." i heard her whisper while looking at me so lovingly. It took my breath away.

I looked down at her and replied, "I love you too, honey. I will always love you, until my last breath."

We look at each other for a moment and then Bella got up holding her empty tray and asked, "Jake, do you want something? I'm going to the kitchen now."

"No, that's alright." I said while trying to concentrate on the television.

"Okay," she responded while heading towards the kitchen.

As she walked away I realized that I could get use to this, having Bella at the house every day, it's becoming routine. Even though I hadn't told Dad yet about the baby, I think he will figured it out, himself. I didn't care about that or anything else other than Bella and the baby. I was on cloud nine, right now. Could life be any better? As if I had spoken to soon, I heard Bella screaming from the kitchen, "Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!"

What the hell just happened ? I thought as I rushed into the kitchen. "Bella... Bella?" I continued, "What ? What happened? Are you okay?" I asked her while checking her to see if she was injured. She didn't say anything, but just pointed at the wall. I followed her gaze and saw nothing.

There was nothing on the wall. "What is it?" I asked her. Who knows, maybe I need to get my eyes checked.

"Jake! Can't you see we're going to be late," she shouted while stomping her foot on the ground. And I thought girls only do that on TV. Wait … why are we going to be late?

"Late? Late, for what?" I asked her.

"Jake! Don't play around, go and get dressed. we need hurry or we will be late?"

What the hell? Are her hormones making her go nuts now? "Bells, calm why are we going to be late? Should we be somewhere?"I asked her calmly.

"Jacob Black! I never thought you would be so irresponsible. We should be at the Cullen's in 20 minutes. You forgot?" she shouted back at me.

What the? Is she insane? She still wants to go there. Oh god. " …"

I was cut short by her shouting ringging in my ear "No excuses. Now get your butt up there and get dressed!" Wow, now that's a she-wolf!

A few minutes later we were on our way to the Cullen's, eventhough I really didn't like the fact of us going ,I couldn't say no to Bells since it was the very reason she agreed to go on with the pregnancy.

But still … I could try my luck, couldn't I? "Bells, do we have to go?" I said with an annoyed tone.

She raised an eyebrow and said, "Well bright one, you should have thought of the consequences before you suggested it the other day." Me and my big mouth!

"Well … I didn't know it would be this bad." I muttered under my breath hoping she didn't hear me.

She replied, "Oh Jake, don't be such a baby, it's not that bad."

" Yeah … not bad. I was about the break the treaty the other day." I snapped at her.

"Well who asked you to be over protective?" she answered me with much annoyance.

Oh, so she expects me to let her have her own way? "well,sorry for taking care of you and the baby"I said while gripping the steering wheel tighter, asi remembered what happend during our last visit to the Cullen's

Emmet,I and the resst of the male Cullens minus the female ones were watching a game on TV. I got son into the game that I hadn't realised that Bella and that leech snuck out of the living room.I didn't realise they were gone until I heard Bella screaming from Edwards' room.

By the time I reached Bella she was sitting on the floor and gripping her stomach tightly. I would have phased and killed him right there, but I didn't have much time. I had to get Bells to Sue immediately. Bells and the baby were more important, so I took her to see Sue.

Turns out that, the baby couldn't stand the cold temperature. The baby was uncomfortable because the leech was too close. If I came a minute later I could have possibly lost them both.

I pushed the memory aside and said, "I swear Bells if he tries to put his arms around you today, I'm going to kill him. Treaty or no treaty!"

Bella put her hand on my shoulder and said, "Jake calm down. You were having fun there, on our last visit. You were practically goofing around with Emmett and didn't you say so yourself, that Esme's cooking was good?"

I turned to face her that instant. What the heck was wrong with her hearing? "Well, Emmett was OKAY and yeah the food was good. But no! I was not enjoying myself, except the part about getting the blonde mad. Bells, do you seriously think that a werewolf would like to be in a house full of leeches?"

I felt a light hit on my arm . "hey!" bella scolded me to defend those leeches.

"oh,okay sorry seriously what is the differences between a vampire and a leech? Doesn't leech make more sense,Bella?"

She responded,"well vampire is the polite term."

"sure, sure." i shrugged.

[At the Cullen's]

Man … what a stench? How could Bella possibly want to come here, but then again she demanded to be here. As soon as I helped Bella to get out the vehicle, the pixie came running up and hugging Bella.

Bella and the pixie were talking away for quite awhile. I can see that the pixie is excited to have Bella over but she was in such close distance to her and the baby. "Okay. ladies enough with the whole chit-chat. Bells, let's get this over with." I interrupted and got between Bells and the pixie.

"Jacob ... it's nice to see you again," the pixie said while biting her lip.

"Sure , sure." I said while passing by her. I headed towards Emmett; well I got to admit he's the only leech that I could stand. I don't mind having him around me, I been wondering how the heck is HE a vampire? A more important question was, how could he find that Blondie attractive? Sure she's...err.. good looking? but with that attitude no wonder she's a vampire.

I noticed that Bella headed towards the kitchen door, I guess she's hungry. I can't blame her; she is eating for two people now so she might be hungry all the not to mention a shapeshifter.

"Jake, I got the bat. Want to go?" Emmet said while holding the baseball and bat. Well Emmetand I were planning to play baseball on our last visit but it poured down the other day so we postponed it to today. It was actually a last minute plan, since I didn't think that Bells would be interested in coming here again. You know after what happened and besides that Edward isn't here so yeah why not?

"Sure!" I said while taking off my jacket.

"Eew, whats that stench? Did something die in here?" the Blondie complained, while coming down the stairs.

Patience Jacob,patience. I felt a hand clammed on my shoulder. I turned my face to see Emmett shaking his head. He said, "Jake, calm down buddy."

"lets go" he said kaing his way towards the door. I just followed him, since it's the best way for me to avoid any regrets for breaking the treaty.

"Why are you still here mutt? I thought we kicked you out of the house the other day?" Rosalie snarled. Ooh she is getting on nerves.

"Rosalie!" I heard Emmett shout with rage. "Are you trying to start a fight here? He's only here because of Bella, so have some respect for him?" He asked her.

"What's wrong with what I said? its the truth. Besides why do we have to have them over? It's not that she's having Edward's child? It's that dog's!" she screamed.

Oh, that was it; I pushed my body forward and crunched my hand into a fist getting ready to punch. But it didn't hit her, Emmett stoped me.

"Jake, calm down. You don't want to break the treaty, do you?"

I growled loudly at him in response.

"Calm down man. Calm down," he said while patting my shoulder.

I felt a pair of warm hands on my cheeks, I know they belong to Bella. I continued glaring at the blondie while holding Bella tightly against me.

"Hun, listen to me please."

What? Did she just ...? Scored! I turned quickly and looked at her. Did she just say that?

When her eyes made contact with mine, she turned her face away. She was blushing, my Bells was blushing for calling me hun. Could this be any cuter? I took a long inhale and tried to relax.

"Hey Rosalie, do you know how to drown a blonde?" I shouted with a chuckle. Well, I might not be able to get physical, but I could get verbal.

"Stupid mutt!"

"I don't." Emmet said while trying to hold his 's my man.

I responded, "It's simple; just glue a mirror to the bottom of a pool." Man wasn't that good, I feel a lot better now.

Emmett and I high-five when Rosalie went marching away into the kitchen.

"Oh, shit," I heard Emmett curse.

I ask him, "Why?"

"Nah, it's nothing, I'll catch you later," he said while running across the room trying to catch up with the blonde.

Okay now that's over, where's my girl? "Bells?" I called her out softly.

Where could she be?I was on my to the kitchen which is the most logical place for her to be right now "Bel ... what the…" I saw, a tall figure behind Bells. He was whispering something to her. No doubt about it, it was for sure Edward. That's it; he isn't going to get away with this.

"Bella!" I shouted at them. I saw the look on Bells face when she turned to see me. No! this can't be happening again. She couldn't be falling for him again? This can't true!

"Jake.. it's not what you seem to think it is" she said it in a rush as if she was hiding something.

"Get away from him, Bells," I said sternly while holding out my hand for her to take it. She stepped away from the leech and came near me, but then the leech pulled her back.

"Leave her alone leech!" I shouted while putting my hands into fists.

"this is none of your buisness !" the leech responded.

" Sure as hell it is! Now get away from her, i dont want your filty hands over her " i snarled at him

In response, he just kept quiet and held bella in his .

"Bells, we are leaving now. come" I said in a stern tone while sending flying daggers towards Edward.

" Jake please.. don't.. its nothing actually." Bella said while moving away from the leech but he grap hold of her tightly.

"Edward.. let go. I don't want neither of you fighting" she said while trying to escape his grip. " . He is not safe now. don't go near him." he said while glaring at me.

I guess he sensed me getting ready to phase. No matter how much i would like to deny that fact, i couldn't. It's true, its not safe for bella to be around now since i might phase any seconds now. Calm down Jake.. you can do it. Calm down.

"Edward let go! I know Jake, he wont hurt me. Let go off me!" she started shouting and wringgling to escape his clutches but he just kept quiet.

"that's it Edward, times up" I said while getting near him.

"ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!"

"Bella!"


	20. dear readers

Dear readers ,

**Well hi..**

**This is kinda important so don't ignore this, first of all let me put this straight. I'm a Jacob lover not Eddie lover, well some of u guys got confuse with that cause I'm still having Edward as an important character. well u see after chapter 21 haha.. alots gona change so Jacob lovers keep your eyes open your gonna love the next chapter. So before "The big changement in chapter 21" do u guys have any doubts in the past chapters that u don't quite understand? Do ask me so that I clear it up and progress to the next chapter. **

* * *

**Some of the question that you all have asked me?**

**(chapter 10 and 11) **

**1)charlie was gonna go to the cullens when he found out that bella was missing but he didnt go there and didnt say anything to bella at first.?**

**ans: yes, charlie was gona go to the cullens but he changed his mind cause jake wrote in the letter that he was gona leave for good and so charlie thought so he better stop jake before he does something he is gona regret as and besides bella must come home so he thought he could handle bella when she does comeback home.**

**2) (chapter 11)the bike was suppose to be a birthday present from jake not trouble maker charlie wouldnt be mad if it was a gift and didnt say anything about the note **

**ans: yes, that is what jake said to charlie that the bike was a birthday present and that is what charlie still believes. this chapter 11 is bella's pov so what edwards says or what she thinks is based on her own sense cause she doesnt know what really didnt say anything about the note cause he thought that wasnt quiet as important as the reason for bella missing for 3 days, he was gona tell her about the note but since he got a call so left. **

**3) the bike was there in the night but bella didnt see it till the next afternoon. how is that?**

**ans:well didnt see it cause, first it was night and cause edward tried to not let her see it chapter 12 edward's pov " _I mustn't let her see this so I asked her " bella, close your eyes now , I'm going to speed up and I don't want you getting dirt in your eyes." "Why speeding up?" why does she have to ask questions for everything " well.. just incase Charlie might want to check you in your room" " oh.. then we better get faster.. ok all closed now" I heard her say, with that I speeded and brought her inside through the window._**

**4) why so long 15 months? (for how long bella would be having the baby)**

**ans: well first of all this is my imagination, and the reasons are cause vampires are the opposite of werewolveslike edward body temperature is really low where else jake's is very high. so in breaking dawn bella was pregnant with her daughter for not even a month so this must be the very opposite i thought. so thats why its 15 months n also cause the longer she is pergnant with the baby the longer jake gets to stay .. mwahahaha i'm evil i know.**

**5) why is edward evil in your story?**

**ans: this is cause nobody knows the true character of edward cause the novels are all based on bella's pov so its what bella sees in edward. she is obsses with him, she thinks his perfect so it may not be true. so i think based on pov hes evil n hes just trying to be nice cause he wants bella. why does he want bella? that is cause ofcourse when you've been alone for over 100 years, and the first person's mind you can't read would be an attractive to you, right? (this was told to me by jul5857, thanks jul)**

**6) what is the gender of the baby?**

**ans: aha.. this i wont be deciding its all of u so better go n vote . go to my profile n vote wheter you want the baby to be a boy or a girl. i can still change the gender of the baby so faster go n vote.**

**7) is there gona be sequeal?**

** ans: maybe if my story hits more than 100 reviews than maybe i'll do **

* * *

**Let me tell you the characters personality in my story, some of it might not be the as it is in the novel**

**Bella ~ tries to hide her feelings for jacob cause is obsese with edward cause she thinks hes perfect**

** ~ get easily influence by whatever edward says **

** ~ doesn't think for herself always puts edwards need first eventhough it might hurt someone**

**Jake ~ a sweet caring guy**

** ~ he is willing to do anythingto keep his promise towards bella **

** (anything as in anything!!!! You will know in the next chapters)**

** ~ he loves bella for who she is eventhough she keeps pushing him away he keeps protecting her.**

**Edward ~ evil , doesn't like jacob or bella relationship with him**

** ~ he lies to bella about jakes actions which causes her to hate jacob.**

** ~ he doesn't like the baby at all and easily tricks bella**

** ~ selfish**

**Charlie ~ hates edwrad and adores jake**

** ~ overly protective over bella **

** ~ but has some quarells with billy about jakes n bella relationship**

**Billy ~ hates bella cause she doesnt care for jake**

** ~ he thinks she doesn't deserves to be jakes imprint**

** ~ tries to get jake and bella seperated**

**Emmet ~ the only cullen other than esme that actually can hang out with jake n likes him**

** ~ he totally supports jake and laugh at his jokes **

** ~ the only cullen that jake can depend on**

**Embry ~ jakes best friend **

** ~ the clown of the story**

** ~ he cares for both jake and bella but doesn't really like bella at first but then he get over it and **

** accepts bella**

**Seth ~ a brother figure to jake **

** ~ the only pack member than handle with the cullens **

** ~ the only that realizes that bella loves jake too **

**THE cullen**

**Jasper ~ doesn't mind having jake around**

**Alice ~ she doesn't really like jake but she doesn't hate him either**

**Esme ~ likes having jake around cause she knows that jake will be a respinsible father to bella' s baby**

** ~ she dissagrees all edwards plan in getting bella back**

**carlisle~ does what he thinks its best for all**

**The Pack**

**paul,quill, collin and brad ~ accepts bella and jakes relationship from the start but kinda didn't like bella at first**

**Sam ~ the only one that trully understands jacob and helps him to make decisions **

** ~ he tries his best to help jake get together with bella**

** ~ godfather to jake's child**

**emily ~ bella's bestfriend in replacing alice**

** ~ bella trust her and tells her feelings to emily and she keeps the secrects**

** ~ tries her best to get bella and jake together**

** ~ godmother to bella's child**


	21. Chapter 20 The true colour Of Romeo

**Disclaimer:**** i don't own twilight and yes i hate edward**

**All hail jacob! team jacob!**

**This chapter is dedicated to jacobfan216, connect2tjb, goldengirl62, smallfrykukie, spikeblack79,** **mayejrmorris, jul5857, garose35, meggie,wendeline4u and zdra8351**

**Btw jul5857, thank you for your review. Your review was the longest so far I have received. There's something special for you in this chapter. Enjoy.**

**Continues from chapter: a change in time (bella's pov)**

**[btw the words that are bold and italic are taken from the novel New Moon chapter 11]**

A few minutes later, I heard someone whisper, "I've missed you" into my ear. The coldness in the voice sent shivers down my spine.

"Ah!" I gasped silently when I felt a pair of arms wrap around me by suprise.

I felt my back hit a very hard surface, I turned around immediately and there he was. The same golden eyes and flaming bronze hair. "Edward," was all I said.

"My Bella," he replied while enveloping me into a hug. I gave in, and laid my head upon his chest. I felt a sudden movement in stomach but I ignored it. I was missing this, Edward and me, together.

I want, no.. I needed us to be back together."My love, how are you doing?" he asked while stroking my hair.

"Other than being hungry all the time, I'm fine." I replied while chuckling. I waited for him to join me but he just kept quiet.I raised my head that was under his chin to look at him. His eyes were vacant and his face carried no expression at all.

Then I saw his hand move and he placed it on top my stomach. I stared at him, wondering what he could be thinking. His face stayed blank and as I studied his reaction I felt a sharp pinch from within my stomach. I winced when I felt it and as a result I stepped back from Edward.

"Uh ... I'm sorry my love, I didn't mean it." Edward said while turning his back at me.

" No. No. It's not your fault. It's just the baby isn't familiar with you. Don't worry it will get use to you." I said trying to get Edward to feel better. I didn't want Edward to be awkward around me while I was sooner or later he will my child's step-dad.

"No, its not." Edward said while looking at the ground and shaking his head.

"It's never going to ..." What? Why was he taking this so seriously? I thought he was fine with this.

"Edward, what do you mean?" I asked him while I tried to reach out and put my hand on his stepped away from me when he saw my hand reaching out.

"Edward … what's th ..." but I was cut short.

"What do you think I mean?" he said in an angry tone while raising both eyebrows.

"Can't you see Bella, it's a monster. I just can't accept the fact you're carrying IT inside you"

"Shut-up Edward! That's enough. How dare you say that about MY baby?" I said with enraged tone. How dare he? I didn't even care if it WAS Edward. I wasn't going to allow ANYONE to say anything bad about my precious one.

"What was I wrong about? Tell me Bella," he said as if nothing he stated was untrue.

"Was I wrong about calling it a monster?" he said . that does it; never ... never get a pregnant woman angry.

"STOP IT! Why do you keep calling my baby a monster? I don't undertsand!" I screamed at him.

"It is what it is Bella. It's a monster, since the blood of a monster runs through it. Tell me Bella, what was the cause of Emily Young's scars?" he asked me in the most calm yet highly irritating way. Blood of a monster?

But the bigger question was how did he know about Emily? And what did any of that have to do with my baby? I was pulled by from my tain of thoughts when I heard him say, "**Speechless** are we? Wasn't her scars caused by a certain monster, who couldn't control himself? Wasn't it Sam Uley?" he continued while he walked around me in a circle.

"What do you call that Bella? A thing which destroys another's life, making them miserable for the rest of their life? A thing which harms your loved ones? Giving you no choice but to live a life full of fear. Let me remind you Bella, '_The apple doesn't fall too far from the tree.' he whispered the last sentence in my ear._

"Even now, the father of this thing is just waiting to kill me. You're the very reason I'm still alive Bella. But what if you weren't there for me? Like the other day, what if you weren't there, surely he wouldn't hesitated to break the treaty" he questioned.

No! This is just wrong. Jacob didn't want to do that ... he wouldn't do that … but didn't he …

_"I swear Bells if he tries to put his arms around you today, I'm going to kill him. Treaty or no treaty!"_

"Bella, is that what you want? for me to die infront of your very own eyes?"I stood there stunned, no response given. How could Edward think that I wanted him to die? I needed him like the air I breathe. He was my everything.

At my lack of response Edwards face crumbled, snapping me out of my thoughts and I instantly reached for him again.

"Don't touch me," he uttered as if he was in pain while turning his back to me.

"I don't want you to leave, but maybe it's best if you go home. I can't do this right now. It's too much." He said wearily over his taken back, I relived every moment, every single word Jacob said on that day.

"_**What do you want?" Jacob demanded, his expression growing more resentful as he watched the play of emotion across my face. "I want to talk to you," I said in a weak voice.**_ Was it too much ask? i thought you were my personal sun.

_**No one can help me now." The words were a low moan; his voice broke. "What did he do to you?" I demanded, tears collecting in my eyes. I reached out to him, as I had once before, stepping forward with my arms wide. This time he cringed away, holding his hands up defensively. "Don't touch me," he whispered.**_ He turned you into a cold hearted…..monster. It tore me apart when i heard him say that.

_**"Wait!"I called as he turned towards the house.  
He spun around to face me, and I saw that his hands were shaking again.  
"Go home, Bella. I can't hang out with you anymore."**_What was that suppose to mean? This is it? Its over? I thought you loved me, how could you do that me to me Jake?

What if Edward was right? No, no … Jake wouldn't, no he couldn't do that … but what if it's out of his control? I struggled with finding the answer and then I remembered my precious one.

"What about you?" I whispered while rubbing my baby bump.

Upon hearing my words Edward turned and stated, "Besides Bella think about it, after the arrival of your child. We will be separated for good since the tribe won't let us get anywhere near you or your baby. Are you ready for us to be separated again? The possibilities of this becoming one of them is high. And what happens when it phases ? Surely it will be wanting me kill me for stealing away it's father's love? Afterall, I am their mortal enemy, aren't I? And what about the forever you always wanted?"

"No, it couldn't!" I said while shaking my head in disbelief.

"I know Bella. I know you don't want your child to be the same as those monsters. So please, think are you ready to raise the ONE THING that will be the reason for us being separated again?"

"Edward please don't ... just stop. I don't want to hear anything about this anymore ... please, please just stop. I beg you!" I pleaded with him while I was on the brink of crying.

"Oh, my love, I'm here for you … for as long as I can be." He whispered while wrapping his arms around me from the ... I can't ... I'm not willing to lose Edward again. I can't bear going through those long lonely months again. It's just too much to bear.

I need both Edward and my baby and I can't choose between those two. If you had asked me a few months ago, I would have without a doubt chose Edward but then as the months grewcloser to my due date, i started loving my baby even more. I just can't! I can't pick!

"Why? Why must it always be like this? Edward I can't loose you again. I don't want to." I said while pulling his arms tighter around me.

At that moment, I felt the sharp pain again pinching in my stomach, but I paid no attention to it. I needed to be near Edward. I needed him to hold me and take away my fears, my worries.

"I don't want to be apart from you either my love, but I can't do anything about it. It's all in your hands. Make a choice." he said while kissing my cheeks.

"Why must it always be this hard? Can't I just have both of you? Is that too much to ask?" I said sobbing into his arms.

"Well there is something else you can do. But. but … you probably wouldn't like it." he said decreasing his tone bit by bit.

"What is it? What? Tell me. If I get to have both of you then I will do it. Whatever it takes." I questioned with new found optimism. A ray of hope shined now, was all I could think to myself.

"Well after your child is born, I could change it into one of us and then change you after our wedding. What do you say my love?" Changing my baby? Well that certainly didn't occur to me at first. But this isn't just my baby, but its Jake's as well. He would never go for this.

"But Edward, I'm afraid Jake would never agree to this."

"Why ask him? Didn't he say it's your choice to have the baby or not? That certainly means he isn't interested in raising this child so why ask him?Besides, when I made you agree to go further with this pregnancy,Jacob wasn't in the picture right?" he questioned.

"Yeah ... but ..." I was having doubts about this, Jake did say that. But recently he's been more than interested in raising this child. He already started thinking of names for the baby and ... there was a rough draft that looks like a cradle on his table.

"But what my love?" he asked but I just remained silent.

"If you believe that Jacob is going to be there for both you and that baby, then you're wrong. You do remember that he WILL imprint on someone. What then? Jacob will want nothing to do with you or the baby. His only concern will be his imprint and having a family her. You nor the baby will have any bearing in Jacob's , what if you did become one of us just like Alice's vision? Then what? Are you ready to let go of your child? "

"I ..."

"Bella!" I heard someone shout, I turned and it was Jacob. I saw the look on his face; it was full of hurt, anger, and despair. What could have happened?

"Nothing is going to happen Bella, as long as I'm here," Edward said while tightening his arms around me.

His arms were around me? Wait ... that's when it hit me, Jacob must have thought something happen between me and Edward. Wait did he hear what we were talking about? When did he come here?

"Jake … it's not what you seem to think it is," I said in rather a rush.

"Get away from him Bells," I heard Jake say sternly while holding out his hand for me. I stepped away from the Edward and went towards Jake, but then Edward pulls me toward him.

"Leave her alone leech!" Jake shouted while putting his hands into fists.

"What if I don't?" Edward god, not now.

"Bells move." I heard Jake say while getting in a fighting god if this keeps up, one of them is for sure going to break the treaty.

"Jake please ... don't ... please calm down." I said while trying to move closer to Jake. But then Edward grabbed me by pulling me around my stomach tightly.

"Edward ... please let just let go of me. I don't want anyone fighting. Please I just want you both to calm down." I said while trying to escape his grip.

"No, Bella. He is not safe now. Don't go near him." Edward said while glaring at Jake.

Oh no ... no ... Jake's not a monster ... he isn't ...

"Edward let go! I know Jake, he won't hurt me. Please let go of me!" I shouted.

But Edward just kept quiet while tightening his grips around my stomach, Iwas suffocating.

"That's it Edward, times up" Jake said while coming closer to Edward and I.

"Edward please let go of me, please …" I stopped mid sentence when I felt the same sharp pinching pain in me again, but this time it was stronger.

I felt the blood rush to my face and my body getting warmer and warmer.

"Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!" I just couldn't take it anymore; the pain was just too much

"Bella!" I heard Jake shout.

"Bella … love?" that was the last thing I heard, before I fell into a deep black hole.


	22. Chapter 21 Kwop Kilawtley

Disclaimer : i dont own twilight and yes i hate edward and maybe bella too.

**This chapter is dedicated to jacobfan216, connect2tjb, goldengirl62, jul5857, zdra8351, avid reader,luvinJ,Slippery,jacoblover16,this is awsome and hi .**

All hail Jacob! Team Jacob!

Get ready with a bunch of tissue boxes people, you're gona need it.** ( the words that are bold and in italic are from the novel new moon chapter 9: third wheel)**

Jacob's pov

"Bella!"

I rushed towards Bella, who was on the lying on the floor but as I was getting close to her my steps started to slow down until I collapse right in front of her. I stared at her in disbelief as, how could she be lying ever so elegant on the floor with her hand placed on top of the baby bump, some would say it's a perfect picture.

But ….. something was wrong in the picture.. she's not moving.. not even the slightest movement. It was like, I am watching Snow White.

The white fair princess was in a deep slumber, waiting to be brought back into the world by prince charming. Only that in my case, I'm not prince charming and neither was the princess beathing.

I got on to my knees and started calling her "Bella..bells.." while shaking her body.

"Bells..wake up.." I said while cupping the side of her cheek.

But I withdraw my hand in an instant when I felt my hand made contact with her cheek. It was as if my hands made contact with ice. Where is the warmness, I felt these few months ago? I closed eyes not wanting to see her in this condition, I felt my whole life being layed right in front of me.

The times I spent with her playing mud pies, the things she use to say whenever I came over to her house to watch a game, the moments we spent at my garage…all went fading away from me. I opened my eyes when I felt droplets of salt run down my cheeks.

"Bella…my Bella" I said while moving my forehead forward to press against still gripping her hand with my other arm. I closed my eyes again but this time it was nothing but a black heart was torn apart, I could feel it aching. I cant accept the fact that I lost her, right in front of my eyes.

My Bella, My precious Bella, My childhood crush, my best friend, my played a big role in my life since I was child till now, she was my other half. But now…. its all a blank, I felt was as if the world has come to and end, my world of course. First mom, then you and the baby. Next who?

"Bella, how could you?" I whispered with eyes still close.

You gave me everything, you gave me hope, a family, a reason to live another day. But you took it all back, just as fast you gave me it. You took my child, my joy, the reason for us being together , you took away everything, I had loved … How am I going to live another second without both you and the baby? It is as if I lost both my soul and emotion, without both I'm just a lifeless body a mere crop.

"_Kwop Kilawtley_ Bella..please I need you. Don't break my heart Bells, please Bells..please." I begged her while rubbing her palm in mine, hoping that the smallest action I did would some how bring her back to me.

" I'm sorry little one, I'm very sorry I wasn't there to save you and mommy"

What kind of father am i? I cant even protect my own imprint and my child? I'm a failure…I can't even keep my promise ….. then it rang in my head, the promise.

" Bella ..." I took in a deep breathe and continued

"Do you still remember the promise I made you ?" I said it to her while tucking her hair to the side even though I know there isn't gonna be any of that day, the day that I promised her came to my mind.

"I know you're unhappy a lot. And, maybe it doesn't help anything, but I wanted you to know that I'm always here. I won't ever let you down-I promise that you can always count on me. Wow, that does sound corny. But you know that, right? That i would never, ever hurt you?"

I promised you that, I'll always be there for you when you need me- never to hurt you. Back then, I had no idea that it would be so hard to keep the promise, but that doesn't mean I'm not going to try. And I did, I tried my very best and look where it has brought us…

"Meeting you was fate, becoming your friend was a choice, but falling in love with you I had no control over. But bells, I never once regretted doing so" I said while kissing her her forehead.

" Ah… bella!" I heard someone gasped behind me.

" shh.. Alice. Keep it down!" another one more voice was heard.

I turned back and found the weird blonde; Jasper was giving me a strange look. Both blondie and that leech were holding back the pixie from saying something. But i could clearly see that she was mumbling something in the grip of the blondie by the mouth.

At first I didn't understand what was going on, I just felt blank. As if nothing bothered, as if nothing mattered.

" Bella!" a high pitching scream continued with a loud cry calling for Bella came from the pixie which automatically snapped me and everything that happened just now came into my was as if all the events that happened just now played right in front of my eyes; Bella in the hands of the leech, the moment Bella interfered me and the leech and the second she fell …

"Bella.." was I all I could whisper.

The only thing that I saw was the leech, the reason I lost Bella.. "Its you!" my voice was dripping with anger.

" Jasper" I heard the leech call out the weird blondie.

But nothing else mattered, as I already have a target. Edward, to revenge back for the people I have lost. Two souls were gone from the face of the earth because of him and for that i am going to revenge him for them. Treaty isn't going to hold me back anymore, I have nothing else to lose as I have already lost everything. I felt my body getting warmer every second, as I charged towards Edward.

"You!" i shouted, charging at Edward.

In a slip second I got to him, I pushed him against the walls. i was actually surprised that i caught him since leeches are known to be super fast. I guess I caught him off guard but that doesn't mean he is gonna get away. He tried to escape my grip but he couldn't because i got a hold of both his hand and legs.

I wanted bite his head off, slash him,break his bones, kill him for good but ... i couldn't. not that i didn't want to but i just couldn't, because my body doesn't want to phase, my body temperature was uneven as well. It was as if i was possessed by something, a wave a calmness hit me but I didn't give in.

It was as if someone is controlling me. "erghh..." i screamed in pain when i felt him crushing my hands, in return i bit him..

Yes i bit him.

Even though i knew it meant that the treaty was broken. I kept my teeth clenched on the side of his shoulder, i tried to rip off his shoulder.

"Jasper! hurry!" I heard him shout at the weird blonde, then the strange wave of calmness hit me again but I didn't let go off him but instead my grip on him loosen.

He took the opportunity to attempt his escape but unfortunately for him. I jumped on top of him, and tried to punch him in the face and to my liking i did quite a he too didn't stay in place, he bit me on my hand n kicked me a few times when we rolled on top of each then, when i was about to punch him again my arms was pulled back so was my body.

It was Embry and Sam. They pulled me over him which Edward took a chance to puch me in the face, one last time. That left me a bruised cheek. Emmet and Jared were holding him off from fighting as how Sam and Embry were holding me.

I tried to break free from them to kill him but then ..."that's enough Jacob!"

I heard Sam shouting at me.

"Do you want to break the treaty ?" he continued shouting at me.

"Sam don't interfere in this.. back off!" I replied him while staring him in the eye.

" Jake.. the treat…." I cut Quill before letting him finish the sentence.

" treaty or no treaty ! what's the point! Shes gone.. I'm never getting her back. He killed her and he must pay for it!" I said in a low but intimidating voice while keeping my eyes on Edward.

" what?" sam snapped in shock.

And was looking at the pixie who was on the ground. She looks like she has been crying with her hand covering her face.

" Is it true?" Embry asked Emmet.

Emmet just shook his head to admit, I heard gasp-es coming from the Embry and Sam let go of me when they saw Emmet's answer.

"NO!"I heard Esme shouting at us which made the whole room giving attention to her.

" She's still alive but very weak…" she continued while looking at the pixie.

I was happy but yet confuse as can I believe her? what if shes saying that just to save her son. I turned my head in the direction where Bella fell just now but she was no where to be found. Fear came to me..

" Where is she?" I started shouting at Esme.

" She is with carlisle, he is taking care of her." she replied me.

" I need to see her" With that being said I tried to pass through Esme and pixie but Esme blocked me.

" Move" I said almost demanding.

" No Jacob.. not now she is in a very critical stage. Carlisle specifically told not to let anyone in. He even ask me to leave the room" she said trying to stop me from getting my fear wasn't fading, what if he changes her? no that's is not gona happen,not as long i live as i live.

" No, I don't trust him" I said.

" But you must " she said back to me pleading. Before I could say anything Sam instructed.

"Quill, tell Seth to bring Sue here right now" Quill just nodded and went outside to phase.I turned back to thank sam but he understood it and nodded his head to me before I could say anything.

After 12 minutes…

Seth brought Sue here as fast as he can which means he phased in front of her. Boy, he has a lot of explanation to do when he's back home. The whole pack plus the Cullens were waiting outside impatiently for Sue to come out of the room with Dr fang.

It was long, it took almost an hour for them to come out of the room, most of the pack were praying for Bella's safety but as soon as sue came out all of us stood up from our seat and approached both Sue and Dr fang.

" How is Bella? Hows she?" I asked sue as soon as she came out. I noticed she wasn't looking at me in the eye and she didn't have the usual cheery look she has. She was silent for long, it didn't made any better for me

" Sue …is she ok?"

" Jake, she is faintly breathing and we could still feel her heart beat but its very weak. But we think she will make it" dr fang said as Sue was still quiet.

I hear a lot voices behind thanking god and relief but for some reason im not happy nor relief something is still bothering me.

" how about the baby?" Embry popped the question before anyone of us could, since the day he found out Bella was with child he was so excited in naming the baby and acting as uncle Embry but his face was motionless now.

" well.." Dr fang started but sue interrupted "Bella was in a lot of pressure and was expose to high level cold temperature and with her weak body .. I'm afraid there's nothing we can do but just pray for the best for the baby …"

That was it, thousand knives were stabbed into my heart .. no it was as if my heart was ripped from me."

what have I done...?" I whispered as I fall down on my knees. My knees couldn't carry my weight any more as well for my tear as it pour down.

"Jake" embry and seth came by my side and patted my shoulder.

" bro.. its not your fault. Take it easy"

"take it easy? take it easy?" I raised my voice bit by bit

"what do you mean take it easy ? I am going to loose my child and almost lost my imprint.. its just too much to handle. Its all my fault. I shouldn't have brought her here"Dr fang came near me and said " Jake, I'm very sorry for everything that had happened and on the behalf of my son Edward"

" Sorry? " I asked him in disbelief and he replied me with a sympathy look

" yes, I'm sorry for what had happened to you?"

" Are you serious? Do you really think YOUR sorry. YOUR sympathy is going get my child back? " I asked him while looking at him. His mouth wide open along with his surprised face.

" well Jake .. I didn't mean it that way.. and its not sure the baby is dea.. .." I stopped him before he go into details.

"Save it Doc.. this all happened because I brought Bella here. You know what, I'm going to make sure that it wont happen again. I'm going to bring Bella to back home with me and she isn't going to see any of you could you please…"

" I got it Jake .." he understood me without letting me go in more details

"Embry get Bella. Bring her to Emily"

"I'm coming with you" Sue said..She continued "she is still very weak and she will need me if theres anymore complication with the baby..so let me stay with her"

"Very 's get going. Jared lead the pack home, I'll be joining you all later after I finish some problems here" Sam said while staring at Dr fang.

" Jake you better follow them, Bella might need you when she wakes up." I just nodded my head to please Sam. To be honest,I didn't have any intention to go back now.. No. Not now. There are things that needed to be settled.

"You can't do that. Bella's wish was to be with us. None of you have any rights to take her from us" Pixie said hissing.

"Look here pixie.I let her be with you leeches and see what happened, I don't want it to happen again. I'm bringing her back and no one is going stop me" I said the last part while looking at the Cullen's.

Carlisle gave the pixie a look that says let-him-be and she stepped back.

" Bella.. don't worry honey, I'm here" i said while kissing her hand.


	23. Chapter 22 bye bye cullens

all hail jacob! team jacob !

**This chapter is dedicated to jacobfan216, connect2tjb, jul5857, zdra8351, mayejrmorris, wendeline4u n sissam93**

This chapter is continuation of "kwop kilytey"  
Jacob's POV

"Look here pixie, I let her be with you leeches and see what happened. I don't want it to happen again. I'm bringing her back and no one is going stop me," I said the last part while looking at the Cullens.

Carlisle gave the pixie a look that says let-him-be and she stepped aside. "Bells, don't worry honey, I'm here," I said while kissing her hand.

"Bella, please stay strong for me," I whispered into her ear.

I carried her in my arms and gave her to Embry. "Take care of her," I said, handing her to him.

"You aren't coming?" he asked in a serious tone.

"Not now. I got some things to handle with Sam," I said while eyeing Sam. Embry flinched when he heard me mention Sam.

"Is it necessary?" he asked.

As if he read my mind, I was thinking about the treaty. I broke it and I have to face the consequences sooner or later - but I personally prefer sooner.

"I did what I did bro, gotta face it sooner or later," I said with a smile.

"Come back soon. I'm sure she will want to see you when she's awake," he said with a worried look.

"Will do. Till then take care of her; this could be long."

He just nodded in reply and headed towards the exit, bringing Bells and rest of the pack away from the leeches lair. When they were out of my sight, I went to meet Sam.

"Why are you still here?" he asked in surprised. He wasn't the only one surprised.

"Huh? What do you mean?" I asked, raising an eyebrow.

"Go home Jake. You got nothing to do here. Besides, Bella needs you," he said without looking at me.

"Sam, I broke the treaty and I'm not going to run away from what I did." I said sternly.

"Listen here Jake. With you being here it's just going to add more complications. For now just go to Bella. I'll tell you everything when I get back. You have my word," he said with a serious look.  
What complications? I didn't feel right but I just gotta trust him on command, gotta obey .

"Fine," was all I replied before I phased and went into the woods, rushing my way into the thick Bella.

(At The Cullen's House With Sam) (third person pov)

The Cullen's residence was quiet, not a single sound was heard except for Sam's heartbeat. Sam knew that he had to put an end on this and so he had made a decision. Esme gathered all of her children, as well as Sam and her husband at the dining table. Everyone was there expect for Edward, but Sam had made up his mind and planning on continuing his plan even without Edward.

"I take it that you all know the reason for our little meeting now," Sam said and everyone nodded their head.

"So, where would you like to start?" Alice said, cutting off Carlisle as he was about to speak, which earned Alice a glare from Carlisle.

"Errm... well, actually I don't have anything in mind because Jacob has already stated his wishes regarding Bella and his child. So I'm merely here to just remind you. Please don't expect Bella to visit you after this, untill the arrival of the baby. And also I expect no visiting from your side to our territory. Your cooperation is highly thanked by us," Sam ended it with that but…

"Cooperation? Who the hell do you think you are mutt? That dog almost killed my brother and you act as if nothing happened!" Rosalie shouted at the top of her lungs while pointing her finger at Sam.

"Watch your mouth leech," Sam sneered.

"Rosalie please control your anger. We are trying to have a peaceful conversation here," Carlisle said while darting his eyes to Rosalie.

"Ughh! Not you too! Is it just me or all of you are just pretending that nothing happened?"

"We aren't pretending. It's just that we are taking things in aslow pace." said Alice while putting her hand on Rosalie's shoulder.

"But…." Alice said with a pause and then continued "I disagree with his wishes. Don't expect me to obey any of them. Bella is my friend and that gives me all the right to see her whenever I wish."

"Yes, I agree with Alice, and we would also like Jacob to apologize to Edward for his ridiculously rude behavior." Rosalie added in with a smile.

"Mind if I have say?" a voice came out which made everyone's head turn to the direction.

"Go on," Carlisle said when he saw who it was.

"Thank you Carlise. I propose that Bella stay with us until the baby is born for her and her child's safety that is" Edward said, which made everyone in the room to look at him in suprise for suddenly suggesting such a thing after what had happened.

"And why would you think that she is not safe with us?" Sam said rather calmly.

"Well as you may have seen, your friend has broken the treaty by almost killing me. He lost his temper, his patience and how could you let such a person with so much anger be around Bella? There are possibilities for him to hurt Bella, aren't there? We all know how stubborn Bella oculd be at times. He is just a kid, he couldn't possibly take on a huge responsibility " Edward said with really wide smile as if he has planned everything perfectly.

"Jacob would never hurt Bella," Sam stressed every word deeply. "He loves her more than any of you could even imagine; she is his may be young and short tempered at when it comes to Bella, he is different. Don't you ever think of him like that ever again!" Sam shouted rage, starting to show the first stage to phase.

"Calm down Sam. You don't want to do that. Besides, Jacob may love her but there are possibilities for him to hurt her accidently isn't there? I believe you know that better than anyone else," Edward said while leaning against the wall.

"You know too much, for being a cold one," Sam sneered when he knew that Edward was talking about the incident that involved Emily getting a scar that was caused by Sam.

"Well, truth hurts doesn't it?" Edward asked. All but one golden haired vampire was lost in this disscusion.

"That has nothing to do with this. It was accident," Sam said while standing from his seat with anger in his tone.

"Well accidents can happen in this case as well," Rosalie said backing up Edward.

"Bella is not alone. She has the whole tribe to protect her and the baby. We will protect them no matter what. I give you my word on that."

"But that's not fair! Bella was my friend before anyone of you entered in her life. And just because because she is carrying one of your tribe child it gives you the right to separate her from us," Alice stated while standing her ground.

"Excuse me for cutting in but if I'm not mistaken Rosalie had requested Jacob to apologize Edward just now and we wish he would do so as soon as possible to settle his actions on breaking the treaty," Jasper said after a very long silence. His actions were rewarded by Rosalie by mouthing silently 'thank you' to him.

"I'm sorry but I think I need to rephrase it. Jacob had stated clearly that he doesn't want anyone of you to be present anywhere near Bella, which certainly means there is no way Bella is coming here after all that has happened. And by the way, I don't see the purpose for Jacob to apologize since it wasn't his fault that he broke the treaty. He didn't mean to do so. He was blinded by the hurt of losing his imprint and child, and of course, anyone would like to revenge the person who caused the death of their loved ones" Sam said like a lawyer, which certainly surprised everyone.

"I do understand what you feel and I'm sorry for my children's behavior but that doesn't give you the right to accuse my son to be the one to have caused the treaty to be broken," Carlisle said smiling.

"Well, I guess you didn't get the whole picture. For your information Carlisle, Edward almost had Bella miscarry by being in a very close proximity to her, and he has been warned not to do so in our agreement the other everyone of you has agreed on. And by all meaning gives Jacob the right to protect or revenge the ones who hurt his family," Sam said looking straight into Carlisle's eyes.

"I am deeply sorry for my son's actions. I'll take responsibility for him from now on so it won't happen again. So with me saying that, could you please lets us see Bella?" Carlisle pleaded for his wife's sake.

"I'm sorry but that is not in my hands. It's Jacob's choice and he doesn't want to take the chances of getting Bella hurt again. So I advise all of you to obey it because after this she is in our territory and I believe everyone here knows well that by trespassing in our territory you will be killed on the spot, which I think you all are smart enough to take care of yourselves," Sam said while standing up from his place as he had finished his talk with the Cullens.

"You and your pack took her from us without her permission. I'm very sure she won't be pleased to know," Edward said while resting against the wall with a devilish smile plastered on his face as he already had an evil plan.

"I'm sure Bella knows what is best for her and the baby and I believe this talk has come to an end. If fate allows us, we shall meet again," Sam said while got ready to phase.

"Oh, I believe we will," said Edward with a wicked smile that didn't please Sam at all.

(At Emily's House)(third person pov)

"Oh my! What happened to her?" Emily said in shock.

"Bella, Bella are you ok? Speak to me dear," Emily said in rush with a concerned expression on her scared face as Embry laid Bella on the bed in the guest room.

"Calm down Emily. Relax, ok? Take a deep breath," Embry said while holding Emily's shoulder.

"Relax? What the hell did you boys do? She was fine just a while ago! Answer me now before I slaughter you all one by one and then hang you all on the ceiling!" Emily shouted with anger towards the boys, making their eyeballs pop out a little bit.

"Easy there wolf mama. It wasn't caused by any of us... it's those leeches," Embry said taking a few steps back from Emily in-case she did what she threatened just now. Luck was on the boys' side when Sue came in and check on Bella, turning Emily's attention on Sue and not the boys.

"How is she ? Is the baby ok?" Emily asked.

"Dear, get a heating pad quick," Sue said, ignoring Emily's question. Emily came back with a heating pad and gave it to Sue.

"Hmmm... Bella, Bella," Sue said while shaking her head."What? Is something the matter?" Emily asked worriedly.

" I told her a lots of times, but she's just stubborn as ever. I'm really sorry for the baby," she said slowly.

"Are they gonna be alright?" Emily asked while putting a warm cloth on Bella's forehead.

" I'm not sure dear. Bella's body temperature isn't stable and it's affecting the baby" Sue said, not taking her eyes off of Bella. Emily gasped.

"Oh dear, Bella. Is there anything I can do?" Emily asked in hope she could help friend.

"For now, just make sure the heating pad is always warm and get Jacob here ASAP," Sue if on cue, Jake came right in.

"I heard my name," he said rather half-heartedly and smiling.

"Good, now just lay down with Bella and be with her. You're the last hope we've got," Sue said rather sad.

"Last hope? What do you mean?" Jacob's face turned serious in an instant when he heard that."She was too close to him. That affected the baby so the last hope is your body temperature," Jake had not moved an inch since Sue told him that, his face was filled with sorrow, his usual smile gone as if it never was there.

"Bella, what have you done?" Jacob said while hugging her close.

"We'll be outside if you need us," said Emily while bringing Sue out with just nodded in reply.

(end of third person pov)

"What does he have that I don't? What did I do to make you hate me this much? Bella, tell me, tell me, please tell me," i said while trying to hold his tears but failed.

I felt tears rolling down my cheeks but I didn't bother to wipe them. Why the hell is wrong with me? Is Jacob black getting emotional? Overreacting? Scared? Maybe I am.I'm crying. Man if Bella saw this she would… I stopped when I realized that she's not gonna see this.

"See what you have done to me Bells?" I said with a half-hearted smile while sniffing back the tears.

"I'm sure you're gonna have a blast making fun of me for crying like girl when you see me. Now all you need to is just open your big brown beautiful eyes and laugh honey, that's all I ask. Just open your eyes and return to me, come back into my arms. Please, please just open your eyes. Open your eyes and say, 'Jake, you're making me laugh.' Tell me that I was dumb and too much of chicken for crying over this simple thing. Just wake up, open your eyes and come back to me and never leave me again"

My thoughts started to drifted to the events that happened earlier that caused her to be in this condition. I should have been more careful. I shouldn't have let her out of my sight. I shouldn't… I wish I could have stopped her falling in love with him. I know that it's impossible but it could if she…

"You shouldn't have come back to Forks, Bella. Life would have been much better. I wouldn't have met you. We wouldn't have been best friends. I wouldn't had any feelings towards you. We wouldn't have this," I said the last part while caressing Bella's stomach.

"Why Bella? Why? Why do you keep doing this to me? I tried my best to be what you want even though that's not who I am but I'm willing to change for you. I know I wouldn't be as great as him. I know where I belong Bella. I may not be talented like him or as smart or good looking as he is, and I can never be as rich as he is but Bella, all I have to offer you is loyalty, never ending love, a loving family and a best friend."

I thought you would change, you know, after you found out that you were with my child. I guess you still love him. When am I ever going to learn that I'll always remain second best for you? Bella, do you how it hurts when you compare him to me, even if it's the smallest thing?

(Flashback)  
"Jacob, Jacob!" Bella shouted near my ear which knocked me out of my dreamland and into reality.

"Uh, sorry Bells," I said with a sheepish smile.

"For the past few days, you are acting quite strange, you know." she said while cocking an eyebrow. "Are you hiding something?" she went straight to the point.

"No! No, what makes you think that? It's ridiculous Bella. By the way, you were going to say something to me just now weren't you?" I tried my best to change the subject

"Oh yeah, I was thinking Jacob, maybe we should visit Renee, you know," she said while twisting the end of a ribbon on her blouse.

"Renee? Why all of the sudden? Is something wrong?" I asked in surprise, because usually she doesn't really talk about her mom and wanting to visit her was always not her favorite thing to do.

"Well, I'm planning on telling her about this pregnancy before Charlie. You know, cause she might take this news better than Charlie in certain ways," Bella pointed out.

"Uh…well, I guess alright. We'll go Bella, but not now. I got some things to settle with the pack," I lied to hide the fact that I am working part time as a mechanic to save up money when the baby comes. Besides if I told her that, she would just suggest using her college fund for the baby, which I don't think is a good idea.

"Settle things with the pack? Jacob you have been giving me that excuse for quite a while. If you don't have enough money, you could have just said the truth. I'm sure Alice wouldn't mind loaning some to us" Bella said without thinking.

I was speechless but tried my best to say a few words." Bella that's not it, really. I..."

Bella cut in before I could finish, "Enough is enough Jacob. I'm sick of your excuses. You have been avoiding me for quite a while. You know what? I should have just followed Edward when he invited me to go. You know Jacob sometimes I wonder if you ever will be capable to handle this baby," she said in range and stormed out of the room leaving me in a shocked state.

The moment I heard her saying that, my heart started to beat slower than ever, The pain that I suffered when I heard that cant be explained by words. It was as if my heart was poked with a poisonous dagger millions of times. How could she say such a thing? I know she didn't mean it, it was her crazy mood swings, because right after she said that she was crying in the bedroom. She felt bad.

(End Flashback)

"But you know what Bella? I'm not gonna give up. Jacob Black has never given up and he won't now either. You are the reason why daddy's not gonna give up. You almost died just now but you were strong enough to handle Edward, which certainly makes you a Black. I guess that's Jacob Black's child for you," I said to my unborn which was the only reason I'm still trying to hang on.

"You may not love me today, tomorrow, or ever but I will love you until it kills me, and, even then, you'll be in my heart," I said while kissing her forehead. That's when hope came from heaven's sky

"Uurghh… that hurts."


	24. chapter 23 stubborn will

All hail jacob! Team jacob all the way!

**this chapter is dedicated to jacobfan216, connect2tjb, goldengirl62,zdra8351,jul5857. **

chapter 23~ stubborn will  
bella's pov

Awakening. I had the sense that I'd been asleep for quite a while. My body was stiff, and refused to do what I was telling it to do.

My eyelids were so heavy they too refused to mind was dazed, and slow. Colorful dreams and nightmares swirled around the forefront of my mind. The terrible dreams and the heavenly dreams were jumbled together.

I felt a sharp pain in my womb. Fear chased the pain away, but not for long. My hand wound itself around my stomach searchingly. Searching for something very precious. It was there before, but now I could find nothing.

'Oh my God! What happened?' I thought to myself worriedly.

My belly was no longer round with child. That could only mean one thing. Where's my baby? Oh my God, what have I done? Wait… What happened? I can't remember what happened just now! Wait just now? How many minuets, hours, or days have passed since I went into my coma like sleep?

I then tried to force my stubborn memory to come back to me, but it refused. All I could remember was being in Edwards arms, and seeing a very angry looking Jacob.

'What made him so angry?' I questioned myself.

Then all of the puzzle pieces clicked together in my mind. I clearly remembered what happened then. Oh God, I hope Jacob didn't hurt Edward!

It wasn't Edward's fault! It was a complete accident. This wasn't supposed to happen. What am I going to say to Jacob when he finds out I miscarried his baby? I don't have the guts to talk to Jacob. He loved that baby more than life itself, and it wasn't even born yet!

"Oh, Jacob." I said wrapping my arms around myself.

Suddenly a warm feeling enveloped me, and to my amazement I felt my baby bump. Out of nowhere someone kissed my forehead.

I was so happy when I realized I was still pregnant that I forgot about the kiss. I tried to open my eyes, but it didn't work. I tried repeatedly until at long last I was successful. Everything was so bright at first that I groaned in pain.

"Ugh, it hurts!" I ground out in agony.

"Bella!" Jacob said in a rush hugging me tightly like I would vanish if he let me go.

"Thank God you're ok! I missed your beautiful eyes and the rest of you of course!" Jacob said his voice quivering as if he was crying.

Jacob Black crying? That didn't make any sense! Was I hurt that badly, or did something happen to my… Oh NO! Did I lose our baby?

"Jake our baby? Jake?" I asked trying to break free from his arms to see if I was still pregnant.

"What's the matter Bella? What is it?" Jacob asked worriedly.

"Jacob is our baby ok?" I asked while checking to see if I could feel the baby.

Ever since I entered the 12th week of my pregnancy I was able to sense the baby. The baby wasn't kicking, or moving yet, but I could feel it's presence when I checked just now I didn't feel a thing, and it scared me senseless.

"Bella calm down! Just calm down honey. The baby is fine. Sue checked it a little while ago, and she said that the baby's fine." Jacob said reassuringly.

My instincts couldn't accept his words.

"But Jake I felt a sharp pain in my stomach. It wasn't a dream was it?" I said stubbornly.  
Placing my hands on my stomach I noticed my stomach was blazing hot, and I couldn't feel the baby. No, his words simply aren't going to work.

"Jake call Sue NOW! Please!" I said while holding my stomach.

Jacob didn't respond at first, and just stared at before I was about to tell him again he rushed out of the room. Almost immediately after leaving the room Jacob came back with Sue and Emily in tow.

"Bella, I was worried about you dear! You scared the hell out of everyone especially Jake. Oh my, you're really pale. Is everything ok? How are you feeling?" Emily asked worriedly.

Was my condition this serious? I guess I scared everyone.

"I'm fine Emily, but I don't think my baby is." I said worriedly.I felt really bad for worrying everyone.

"The baby Sue…" Emily's voice started to drop down in volume when Sue began to check up on me.

After Sue did all of her checkups on me, she asked me "What makes you think that the baby isn't fine?"

"I felt a sharp pain in my womb; my body temperature is back to the way it was before my pregnancy. My stomach is warmer than usual and..." At first I hesitated to say it because Jacob was there I didn't want him to worry but for the sake of the baby, I just had to tell Sue.

"And?" Sue asked me to continue.

"Well I couldn't feel the baby" I said looking down at the floor, I couldn't look up at his face. I just couldn't.

I hurt Jacob a lot and I keep hurting him but I don't do it on purpose. It was just an accident.  
"You mean, before this the baby used to kick?" Sue asked in surprise.

"No, not that. It's just, I could feel the baby before. I just felt it, I felt it alive. I don't know how to explain it. But I just know that the baby was always with me before but I can't feel it now. Is the baby alright Sue?" I asked her in worry.

Even though my baby bump was still there it didn't help to relieve me. I waited for Sue's answer, the longer she took, the more terrified it made me.

"Sue." Emily called her slowly to end the suspense.

"I'm sorry, I just got carried away." Sue said trying to concentrate on answering me.

"Where was I just now?" Sue asked as if she had forgotten.

"You were going to tell us the baby's condition." Jake said after a long silence, I guess he couldn't wait to know the baby's condition.

"Oh yes, sorry. Uh. The baby, well there's bad news and there's good news. The good news is the baby is still alive, so Bella you don't have to worry." Sue said calmly.

No need to worry? What about bad news?

"The bad news, Sue" Emily asked as if she read my mind.

"Well, um how do I put this?" Sue was searching for the words to explain.

I don't think that helped my fear for my baby's life any more than how I felt with what I knew a little bit ago.

"Well, this incident has happened before, as we know. Which makes this the second time the baby was exposed to very low temperature." Sue said bit by bit but still hadn't told us what was wrong.

What is wrong?

"Go on." I said as I couldn't stand waiting any longer to find out the condition of my baby.  
"Yes well due to both incidents I think um. I'm not sure how to say this." Sue said slowly still trying not to let us know.

"Just tell us, Sue. We haven't got all day!" Jacob said rather harshly. "Jacob!" I hissed him.  
"It's ok, dear. It's my fault; I'll get on with the news. Bella might have some complications in the future." Sue gulped out quickly.

My heart beat started to race, and my hand wound itself around my stomach. Complications? Oh god what have I done? I heard a loud banging noise from where Jacob was standing which made all of us turn our heads in that direction.

"Jake." I gasped when I saw him trying to stand up. It looked like in his surprise he slipped and fell to the floor.

I turned my head in Emily's direction to see her reaction, as I thought. One of her hands covered her mouth. She looked to be in shock. Well I didn't blame her. None of us saw this coming.

"What kind of complications are we talking about?" Jacob asked successfully breaking the silence.

"Well I couldn't be 100% sure, but I think the baby won't go through a normal process of development and."

What's that supposed to mean?

"What do you mean?" I asked to clarify.

"Well the baby would be healthy but I don't think it would be capable of going through any of the normal processes a baby goes through during pregnancy such as movement that you could feel, or even kicking. The delivery might be a difficult one as well. It will be a little slower than normal while it is in the womb basically said." Sue said sadly.

"You mean the baby won't survive?" Emily asked.

I don't even want to know her answer.

". What I meant was the baby will be developing slower in the womb than a normal baby, and that we might have to deliver this baby by caesarian-section. But I can assure you that both Bella and her baby are currently in good condition." Sue said reassuringly.

It released the breath I had been holding in relief.

"You were about to say something just now. What was it Sue?" Jacob asked.

"No it was nothing. I was just about to say something about the delivery is all." Sue answered him.

Everyone in the room turned our heads in the direction of the door when we heard a knock on it. We waited silently to see who it was. Embry poked his head around the door.

"Hi Bella. I see you're up how are you doing?" Embry asked when he saw me.

"Oh hey Embry I'm doing ok I guess." I said calmly.

"That's great! Would you mind if I borrowed Sue for a little while?" Embry asked me.

"Sure" I said.

"Why do you need me?" Sue asked confusedly.

" Sam came back and he wants to talk to you immediately he said." Embry said quickly. Jacob's eyes snapped to Embry's when he heard Embry mention that Sam was back.

"He's here?" Jake asked Embry for confirmation.

Embry just nodded in reply.

"I'll go with you I have some matters to settle with him" Jacob said to Sue.

Before he was about to go he said "Emily could you?"

Emily answered him before he could even finish. There after they left, the room was empty just the two of us. Me and Emily.

I looked at her since I felt as if I haven't seen her in a long time. Her hair was messy, her eyes were red and her face was pale. She didn't look like the Emily I knew, and that worried me.

"Oh Bella." Emily said hugging me close.

She felt the pain I felt. After all she is like my sister, other than Alice ofcourse. Wait . Alice?

"Alice! I totally forgot about them." I whispered

"Huh? What is it Bella?" Emily asked me.

I held Emily's shoulder to make her look at me

"Emily I forgot about them. I totally forgot about them!" I said in rush.

"Bella calm down! Who did you forgot?" she asked.

"Alice, the Cullens. I just left without telling them." my voice which started loud at first quieted down when I noticed that I couldn't remember how I came here.

"How did I even get here?" I asked Emily after thinking for a while.

"The boys brought you here after you fainted. That's all I know, sorry" Emily said.

"Did the Cullen's come here?" I asked hoping they did.

"No they didn't. Well actually they can't." Emily said looking at me.

"What do you mean they can't?" I asked in surprise.

"Well this is our territory. They aren't allow to come after what had happened" Emily said calmly.

"Wait did something happen?" I asked.

Wait did they had a fight? Jacob wouldn't break the treaty would he?

_(Flashback: from chapter 19~ a change in time)_

_"Oh Jake don't be a baby, it's not that bad." I said trying to cheer him up._  
_"Yeah, not bad. I was about to break the treaty the other day." Jacob replied annoyed._  
_"Well who asked you to be over protective?" I said rolling my eyes._  
_"Well, sorry for taking care of you and the baby." Jake snapped._  
_"I swear Bells if he tries to put his arms around you today, I'm going to kill him. Treaty or no treaty"_

_(End of flash back)_

Those words were ringing in my ears now, he might have hurt Edward? "Oh, no.." I accidently said my thoughts out loud.

I wouldn't forgive Jacob if he had hurt Edward.

My thoughts were interrupted when Emily asked, "What is it Bella? Is something bothering you? You seem to be scared of something."

"I need to see Jacob now!" I said that while getting up from bed and heading towards the door.

"Bella wait. Where do you think you are going in this condition?" Emily asked as if she didn't hear me just now.

"I told you I need to see Jacob." I said as I went out of the room to find Jacob.

But unfortunately, I only saw the boys there. Not a sign of Jacob, Sam or Sue. What could they be?I heard a lot of gasps from the boys who just realized I was there.

"Bella I thought you were supposed to be resting?" Quil said getting my attention.

"Yes, but I need to speak to Jacob NOW!" I answered him angrily.

"He's not here right now, But he will be back soon. I'll ask him to meet you right away when he comes back." Quil said quickly and pointing to my room in a way of telling me to get back in the room and rest.

The only rest I will be going to get is after I know exactly what happened at the Cullens.

Wait maybe they were there and seen what happened after I fainted. Quil was going on, and on about me needing to be resting before Jacob got here or else the boys would be in for trouble.

"Yes, yes I will go and rest Quil but I need you to tell me what happened after I fainted first." I said trying to get some answers from him.

"Well by the time we arrived there, you already passed out. We tried to bring you back here as soon as we could and after a few hours you woke up." Quil said after thinking for a minute.

"No I mean what happened? Did Jacob do anything? When did you all get there?" I asked in rush.

He kept quiet for a very long time and answered me while looking at the floor. "Well they had a fight but luckily we arrived just in time."

"Fight? What kind of a fight? Just in time for what? Please tell me the truth Quil. I know you don't lie." I tried my best to get him to tell me all of what happened instead of just pieces of the story.

"Well just in time to get you back here." he said still looking down at the floor.

"Quil if you think of me as your friend then please tell me the truth." I pleaded with him.

"Really that's all of it nothing happened!" Quil said firmly, and finally looked at me.

Quil was lying. His hands were shaking. Jacob had told me about the boys when we use to hang out. He used to tell me his friends personality and habits. From that, I knew that Quil was lying. His hands would shake if he's lying and that's why Quil was staring down at the floor just now.  
Well he was actually staring at his hands to stop the movement of them.

"Fine I thought you were my friend but as it turns out I'm wrong. It's ok if you don't want to tell me. I'll find it out myself." I growled and went outside.

I know im not supposed to be driving in this condition but I just had to do it.

I was just about to get behind the wheel when a warm hand gripped my hands, and forced me to move away from the car. I turned to see who the hands belonged to and it turned out to be Quil if I was honest with myself I would admit that I wished it was Jacob's hands.

"Bella I'm sorry. I'll tell you but promise me you will not make a big deal of it ok?" he asked looking defeated but serious.

I nodded my head in reply and waited for his answer.

"By the time we reached there Jake had him against the wall but nothing serious Bella." Quil said trying to reassure me.

"Did he break the treaty?" I asked calmly.

"Well it's not my place to say anything about anything of this to you. I'm not the one you should be asking. You are going to get me in a lot of hot water if you keep asking questions that you know I can't answer!" Quil said trying to avoid the question.

"Quil answer me" I demanded looking him straight in the eyes .

"Well he didn't mean to. Jake just got too emotional, you know with you lying on the ground not moving. The rest of us thought you were dead. No offense Bella, because you looked real pale and your body was as cold as ice." Quil said trying to cover for Jacob but it couldn't be avoided.

He broke the treaty. He hurt Edward. He might have killed him.

"How is Edward? Was he injured badly?" I asked worriedly.

"Well, I'm not sure. He wasn't there after Sue came to check on you. He disappeared; the only ones there were the pixie and the annoying blonde." Quil explained.

"Oh Alice. Was she ok last time you saw her?" I asked.

"Uh. She was throwing a fit, but she looked ok to me." Quil said after he thought for a while.

"She through a fit? What do you mean? "I asked surprised because Alice was always kind of quiet and chirpy.

"Well she was accusing Jake of doing a bunch of things he'd never do unless pushed to do. Don't worry Jake made a statement and ended all of that drama. If you know what I mean?" Quil said to me winking.

What's that's supposed to mean?

I have to see her now. I don't feel right." I made up my mind.

"No Bella! You are not allowed to go there!" Quil raised his voice a little.

"What do you mean I'm not allowed?" I shouted at him back.

"Not in this condition you aren't supposed to go there and besides Jake will kill me if he knows I let you go there even after everything that happend as well as what he has said." Quil shouted while trying to reach out to me.

"After what he said Quil?" I demanded to know.

He stayed quiet for a while.

"Quil answer me! What did Jacob say?" I shouted so loud all the boys came out of the house.

"What's going on?" Jared asked to no one on particular.

It was quiet for a while with the boys just looking at each other but I just couldn't stand there anymore without knowing what in the hell happened.

"Can any one of you kindly tell me why am I not allowed to go the Cullens?" I asked in harsh but yet low voice while gritting my teeth.

The boys became tense and shocked. There was definitely something fishy going on here.

"Quil? Im waiting" I said directing the question to him while tapping my foot on the ground.

I kept staring at him and he kind of started giving the help-me-out-guys kind of looks to the boys.

"It's nothing serious Bella." Seth said out of no-where.

"Yeah nothing to worry about. Jake has got it covered." Embry added.

"And what exactly does he have covered?" I asked arching one of my eyebrows.

"Ah, yes a very good question Bella. Unfortunately, I have no right to tell you that, none of us do. Why don't you wait here, until Jake gets back and ask him to tell you?" Embry said trying to please me, but it wasn't working.

"No I don't have the time I'm in a hurry to go somewhere. Either one of you tells me or I'm leaving!" I lied even if they told me I'd still be leaving.

I just need to see with my very eyes that Edward is unharmed.

"Huh? Bella didn't Sue say you should be resting?" Jared asked as if I don't know.

"I will rest, not now, and not until you guys tell me what happened while I was passed out!" I said trying not to shout.

This will be hard if they don't want to cooperate.

"I told you everything that happened while we were there!" Quil said pleading with me.

"No not everything Quil! You still didn't tell me why am I not allowed to go to the Cullens!" I repeated myself.

"Bella, we told you. You should be resting not going around that's why you aren't allowed to go there!" Embry said irritated.

It made sense but it didn't sound right. I needed to clarify what they were saying as fact and I knew just the person for it.

"Is it true guys?" I asked them and they nodded quickly.

I turned my gaze towards Seth

"Is it true Seth?" I asked him, since he is the only one that has been honest so far.

"Seth, I know I can trust you. You are being honest with me right?" I asked him teasing to get the truth.

He was shaking his head and was about to nod his head yes.

"Not really." Seth gave up.

"What are you hiding from me?" I asked looking him in the eyes.

"Just like Embry said Bella. It's not in my power to tell you about it." He said slowly arranging his words.

"But I want to know, and I want to know now. Don't you think I should have the right to know?" I asked them all.

"Well yeah, but it's better to hear it from Jake's mouth. He can explain it better." Seth said trying to give me an excuse.

"But I need to know right now. Why must he tell me? Why can't any of you tell me?" I asked raising my voice bit by bit.

"It was his decision. So it's better that he be the one to tell you!" Quil said looking at me.

"What decision?" I asked confused as to what they were talking about.

"Bella please don't make it hard on us." Jared said with his eyes covered by his hand, and shaking his head.

"No…." I snapped.

Everything they said was making me believe that Jacob hurt Edward, and maybe even killed him. I have to act fast. I climbed in to my car and started the engine. Seth pleaded with me to give it a rest.

"Tell me, or leave me be." I ordered angrily.

"Fine!" Seth growled.

"Turn off the damn engine first!" Seth ordered.

I did as he told me. I leaned against my car after hopping out of it. I faced the boys, and mostly facing Seth.

"Ok I'm all ears." I said sarcastically.

"Jake… He." Seth started, but Embry cut in.

"He did what he thought was best for you and the baby Bella. Nothing more, and nothing less." Embry said simply.

"Tha,t I will decide for myself. Now Seth please continue." I said calmly.

"Like Embry said Jake meant no harm Bella. Everything he said was for you and the baby. It was a desperate thing he had to do as well." Seth said still not getting to the point.

"All he did was TALK!" Seth said as if I was an idiot.

"Why am I not allowed to go over to the Cullens? This is what I want to hear Seth!" I hissed at him.

Seth stayed quiet for a while.

"Well he thought you know he…" Seth was trying to arrange his words better but they seemed to fail him.

"Just spit it out Seth!" I shouted at him.

"He forbid the Cullens from ever seeing you again untill the baby is born!" Seth said it extremely fast so I asked him to repeat it again, but he kept silent.

"Look here Bella what he does is all about yours and your baby's safety. Don't yell at him. You are the one being childish. Jake meant no harm. It's just until the baby is born after that it's as you wish." Embry said slowly, but I'm still confused.

"He doesn't allow any of the cold ones visitors to approach anywhere near you, because it can kill the baby, and can cause serious complications. He doesn't want to take the risk." Embry said quietly.

"What? Who is he to have the ability to have a say in this? This is my life, yes I'm having his child, but that doesn't give him the right to take away my freedom." I shouted at the boys.

I was angry, embarrassed, and sad.

"Bella, you really want to kill your baby that badly? You want to hurt Jake that badly then leave, but don't come back." Someone unknown snarled.

"I'm going." I said and with that stormed off towards my car, and headed to the Cullens Mansion.


	25. chapter 24 heartless monster

All hail jacob! Team jacob!

**This chapter is dedicated to jacobfan216, connect2tjb, goldengirl62,zdra8351,jul5857, nluvwithemmetcullen, Passion Black n cinnamin. Hi guys, I'm back... Yeah last chapter was quite a surprise, hahaha.. but I loved it. It actually showed how much Bella is obsessed with Edward. I would like to thank "Secrets are nothing" and "zdra8351" for their support and help in my previous chapter.. I love ya..**

THIS CHAPTER IS IMPORTANT! MUST READ SO THAT YOU COULD UNDERSTAND THE NEXT CHAPTER.

This chapter is based on third point of view by the cullens, it takes place right from sam's conversation with the cullens. This conversation happens during the time, jacob, sue,emily and bella's conversation. This conversation also covers the time when bella was confronting with the pack about jacob's decision in the previous chapter.

Third's person's pov

"I'm sure Bella knows what is best for her and the baby and I believe this conversation has come to an end. If fate allows us, we shall meet again," Sam said while getting ready to phase.

"Oh, I believe we will!" Edward said with a wicked smile that didn't please Sam at all. As soon as Sam left the mansion the Cullen's got into an argument.

(after Sam left)

"What is the meaning of this?" Carlisle asked heatedly.

"Depends on what you're referring to." Edward answered him secretively.

"You know very well of what I am referring to Edward. Don't make me lose my temper." Carlisle said while attempting to calm his anger.

"It was an accident, no harm was intended." Edward said plainly while raising both his hands in the air, no feeling of guilt in his words.

"Edward stop lying, you know very well the effect on the baby if we get anywhere near it. You, of all people would know that with your ability." Carlisle voice started high but dropped at the end.

"But why? Why did you still go further? She could have lost the baby" Carlisle said in pain while shaking his head not wanting to fully accept the truth.

"Oh please Carlisle. As if I care about it. " Edward said calmly with a hint of annoyance in his tone.

"You don't care? Then why in the world, did you have her agree on having the baby? " Esme asked in surprise.

"Yeah. I thought you encourage her to go through with the pregnancy?" Emmet said in confusion.

All the Cullens were looking to Edward for an answer. After a very long silence, a creepy smile plastered itself to Edward's face.

"Ha.. Alice don't tell me, you haven't told them?" Edward said with laugh at the start.

"Tell them what?" Alice questioned Edward.

"I see, you have forgotten." Edward spoke walking toward Alice.

"Alice? What is it?" Carlisle raised an eyebrow in question.

"Tell them Alice. Tell them what you saw when we were at the Volturi and not to mention when we found out about bella's pregnancy as well." Edward whispered to Alice in a voice so low no one else around would hear it.

Alice gasped turning to face a laughing Edward. She was frozen, her face pale and her mouth dry.

"Alice.. Alice.." Esme called out for her daughter but no response.

Everyone was worried about Alice. Jasper flitted to her side trying to calm her emotions.

"Edward. What is it? Tell me. I demand to know!" Esme shouted.

"Very well.. You still remember the time Bella was brought here when she fainted right?"Edward asked.

"Yeah" Emmet answered.

"When all of you were entertaining the unwanted guest, Alice had a vision…" Edward stopped there.

"What kind of vision?" Carlisle asked while holding Esme in his arms.

"You weren't supposed to know to about should have known about it.." Alice said out of nowhere, her hands shaking, her body trembling.

Edward chuckled.

"It's too late Alice.. the vision was about, me and the mutt having a conversation. I was suggesting the mutt to have a child with Bella. I was persuading him actually, I looked desperate, and begging him to agree because that was the only way Bella would be able to have a child and yet still survive through the pregnancy." Edward said in disgust.

Everyone in the room was surprised, except for Alice and Jasper.

"I don't get it.." Emmet said shaking his head.

"Me either.. What are you getting at Edward?"

"You see.. in the vision I was the one who begged him to have the child, Bella would have surely disagreed and might have hated me for doing that behind her back. But luck was on my side, it…" Edward was cut off halfway by Rosalie who caught Edward's master plan sooner than the rest of the clan.

"But .. it actually turned out the other way around, it was he who impregnated her and Bella wasn't pleased at first." Rosalie completed.

"Very good Rosalie." Edward praised her.

"But why let her agree to go on with this pregnancy? I still don't get it." Esme said.

"Esme..oh Esme.." Edward sighed shaking his head side to side.

"Why on earth would I reject good fortune when it comes falling into my lap? You see my point is, in letting her pursue this pregnancy, I gain a lot of benefits." Edward said smiling happily like a child in a toy store.

"Such as..?" Carlisle asked.

"Well, she will be alive giving birth to the pup for starters. And in her eyes, I'll be the reason for her happiness not him." Edward said happily.

"What good does that bring you?" Emmet asked raising his voice.

"What do you mean?" Edward asked.

"Yeah what benefits you in Bella having a tribe's child? Besides you hate it" Rosalie asked.

"Well, it's not fully their blood, its part Bella's as well. Which in the future in case, if bella did become one of us it will be easy for me to change it into one of us as that I like the idea but I would do it, for Bella's sake ." Edward said happily.

"What the hell are you thinking Edward? Are you trying to start a feud with them? How dumb could you be?" Emmet rose from his seat and continued his tirade at Edward.

"Relax Emmet, no need to worry. Bella doesn't mind us changing her child." Edward said calmly.

"Hmm make sense, she herself wants to be one of us, but what about the mutt? What are you going to do about him?" Rosalie asked.

"you are worried about him? Bella doesn't love him, she tried to move on with jacob when I left. But i'm here now, she wants me not him. I'm sure, he will get the message and leave by knows that much." Edward said calmly.

"you know, Bella loves him! Don't you try to hide that fact!" Emmet shouted in rage and Esme backed him up by saying " She is carrying his child and they are going to start a family soon. You don't want to break a family, edward. It's not who you are."

"first of all, she loves me more than him. He is nothing but her bestfriend and the father of her child. But that may change, you better remember that." He stressed every word.

And continued "I love her Esme. For over a century, I waited for the one. And now that I have her, you want me to just let go off her? And if i'm not mistaken I did once. I left her, but she cameback for clearly wants asked for forever. And forever she gets. It's our life and there is not going a Jacob Black in our life after the baby arrives. I'll make sure he leaves.

"What makes you think either one of them are going to be willing to do that?" Jasper asked.

"Well when we were in the room when Bella fainted, the mutt thought she was dead and was mourning her. That's when the mutt replayed all his memories with Bella. One of it was a promise he made to Bella and I might use that against him." Edward answered again still calm.

"don't you that's a little cheap, Edward?" Rosalie asked him while raising an eyebrow.

"I can't help it Rose, she is my La Tua Cantante" Edward sighed.

"Don't you think Bella will be angry about that? Have you thought of her feelings at all Edward? She still considers Jacob as her bestfriend." Alice said defending her best friend.

"Alice, the mutt still needs an imprint. Have you forgotten? He still has the chance to imprint on some other girl. Won't that hurt Bella? Seeing her child's father being with another woman?" Edward lied.

He knew for a fact that Jacob had imprinted on Bella. (check out chapter 15, only the male vampire knew that jacob imprinted on bella)

"But.." Emmet started to state that Jacob imprinted on Bella but Edward beat him to it.

"Ugh… ok listen.." Edward said out of irritation when every one of them started to question him.

"Bella and the baby will be better off without the mutt and that's it.." Edward shouted .

"No ..no.. That's not the way it is supposed to be. The child is innocent, it should be free not have to change into one of us. You know, what a misery being a vampire is and yet you intend on changing the kid as well. How cruel could you get Edward?" Esme said in pain seeing her son being a heartless monster.

"Me? cruel? Why can't any of you understand me?" Edward shouted and continued, "I'm giving a great opportunity to the child though it's not mine. Bella is persistent into changing and Alice has seen a vision of her being one of us. We have also gave our word to Volturi , so either way the odds of Bella becoming one of us is bigger even though I am not pleased with it." Edward said while staring at the window.

"And if Bella is one of us, how is she going to be a mother? Bella has grown to love pup and i'm sure she wants to keep would safe for us if the child is one of about it, the child would not be one of them if we changed the baby before it starts wouldn't it be more cruel if the child have to grow up with a mother being your mortal enemy? How is anybody going to explain to the kid. The child needs a life.I'm doing it a favour because I think of it as my own." Edward admitted the fact that he grew to love the baby.

He didn't love it at first but he started loving it the second he read the baby's mind the other when he was with Bella. Such pure thoughts, the baby actually likes him. It didn't seem to enherit any hatred from it's father's side.

"Don't forget that the kid still has a father. Im very sure he is capable of taking care of the child. Since he has been through a lot of ups and downs in his life." Emmet raised apoint defending his friend .

"Yes I see. You want the kid to have motherless life? Watching the father spending time with another woman? Living a life as a step child with no contact with both parents? Is that what you are saying?" Edward demanded eventhough he knew Emmet knows the truth.

Jacob imprinted on Bella. He knew but he was intending his reply to the female audience which didn't know the little secret.

"I'm sorry Edward for not agreeing with you earlier on, but now I see what you're trying to do. You have my support." Rosalie said smiling at Edward.

She saw it as revenge for what the mutt had done.. Taking his love.. Taking his child.. 'Oh what a sweet revenge.' Rosalie thought.

"Besides, if Bella has to be with the mutt… She is trapped in a town where there isn't much to offer. Bella wasn't raised here, that is why she is different ..Open minded, and caring. Can the mutt offer the best education, house, things that both Bella and the child need?" Edward asked and answered himself when no one attempted to answer.

"See, Bella and the child would be better with me, a caring family, and access to whatever they want, and a long wants me, the baby, eternity, to be one of us and also be save from Volturi. Everything she wants, a life that Bella wants. What else do they need? With the baby with us, Bella and I would have a happy family. Won't you say?" Edward tried convincingly.

"I suppose .." Carlisle said.

"What? I can't believe you?" Esme said when she was surprised to hear his answer and left.

Wait Esme.." Carlisle said running after Esme who was now out of the agreed to Edward's point only for fact that Bella and the baby would be save from the he knew, how cruel could they be.

"Great now she's upset.." Rosalie muttered.

"I wouldn't blame her! I don't agree with you at all Edward. He should have just killed you now. And yet he didn't because of Bella!" Emmet said irritated while getting up from the chair.

"You think too highly of him Emmet." Rosalie said.

Emmet had a confused look on his face while he was waiting for an explanation.

"He didn't do it because of Bella. Jasper was controlling his emotions, he couldn't handle so much emotiones at one time because the mutt was grieving. So Jasper shut him down.. making him forget everything for a while before he attacked Edward." Rosalie explained.

"You guys are sick! He didn't even try to hurt any of us before you started ." Emmet said while glaring at Edward.

"I have to have some time to think." Emmet said calmly after remaining quiet for awhile and left the mansion.

"Follow him he's going to tell the mutt my plan.." Edward said after a few minutes.

Rosalie, Alice and Jasper followed him.


	26. Chapter 25 Tears of a father

**Disclaimer: No, I don't own twilight and yes I hate Edward...**

**All hail Jacob! Team Jacob all of the way...**

**This chapter is dedicated to the following jacobfan216, connect2tjb,zdra8351,jul5857,Angelic95,Passion Black,I Luv Seth, AriesFireQn,Ainnamon,DeadGrlSprStr666,Nluvwithemmetcullen,**

**Hey guys, Im really glad that you liked the previous chapter. Im sorry for sending in this chapter so late, my mum cut off my internet connection due to my grades. Well never the less, I won't abandon this story. It's kind of my life now, and all you are my family. (Hahaha I'm too sentimental) Well erm this story has another 15 to 20 chapters left. This story will have an ending that none of you could expect so be prepared with tissues. If you want a sequel please go to my profile and vote. If more than 15 vote I'll proceed with the sequel if not I'll leave it this way. **

**Oh yeah listen carefully cause this might be confusing, until the previous chapter. Bella left emily's house in search of Edward to see whether he is still alive in doing so she had an argument with the pack. While bella was having the argument and left emily's, Jacob went out and had a conversation between sue and sam which is this chapter. And while bella had and argument and Jacob had a convo, Edward was explaining to his family about his plans on getting bella to himself . ok now you can proceed in reading the next part..**

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**(Jacob's pov)**

"Where is he?" I asked as soon I left the room.

I felt terrible leaving Bella alone with the condition she was in, and to add insult to injury we both found out that Bella's pregnancy was going to be complicated one. It's my entire fault. I should have been there with her. I should have protected her. I wasn't aware that I wasn't shaking my head while went stuck thick in my thoughts

"Jake, Jake." Embry shook my body which brought me back to my senses. I blinked a few times and was about to answer when he cut me off.

"Jake are you ok?" Embry asked worriedly.

I just have to keep it inside. None of them need to know right now.

"Yah I'm ok." I said with a sigh.

"Since when did you start to lie?" Embry asked cocking an eyebrow.

**_Since I imprinted on her_**_._

"What makes you think I'm lying?" I asked stubbornly.

"Jake seriously? How dumb do you think I am? Your face says it all. You look like someone who lost their favorite puppy! Basically" he said jokingly but yet in a serious tone.

**_I am living in hell._**

"Do I look that bad?" I asked him.

"Yeah you seem pretty upset. Did something happen to Bella?" Embry asked in concern.

I knew the pack didn't like the fact that I imprinted on Bella, especially Embry and Quil but the fact that they are willing to put aside their differences for me was just …. Well it made me speechless.

"Not really sue said…." I stopped there when seth interfered.

"Embry have you seen Sam? Mom couldn't find him!" Seth asked calmly.

"Oh yeah I forgot. Tell her he's waiting for her outside. " embry replied.

Sam…. Ahh… I totally forgot him…

**Great now I'm stuck with Sam on my mind. If he gets hurt Emily will never forgive me!**

"All right, thanks. Oh yeah Jake, hows Bella?" Seth asked before heading towards his mom.

"Not now Seth. I'll tell you both at the same time as I tell the pack. I have to talk to Sam. In the meantime do me a favor and keep Bella in the room. She needs all rest she can get. And if I find out any of you disturbed her. I won't hesitate to hurt you." I said deadly serious.

"Chill we won't even talk to her until you get back. You happy now?" Embry asked calmly.

"Ok while Sam and I are out. I'm putting you in charge." I said tapping Seth's shoulder.

"Sweet." Seth said happily.

"What? What do you mean he's in charge?" Embry shouted.

I automatically slapped his shoulder.

"Shut up Embry. I told you she's resting." I hissed.

"Sorry Jake it's just. Well it's just not every day you HEAR A 15 YEAR OLD was put INCHARGE!" Embry grumbled in a lowly.

"Awww is little Embry mad because I didn't put him in charge?" I asked teasingly.

"Iago!" Embry shouted and stormed off into the living room.

"what does the parrot from Aladdin have anything to do with this? " Seth asked innocently.

"err…seth ..i don't think he meant that Iago" I said while trying to hold back my laughter.

Seth look at me with his famous blur expression. " huh?"

"no.. I think embry meant Iago, the bad guy from shake spear classic.." I explained to him but his face gave it away with a big question mark on his forehead. "err..nevermind. He just wanted to be in charge. You took what he wanted. Don't worry he'll get over it." I whispered while patting his back.I couldn't take my eyes off the entrance of the living room. I hope Embry didn't hear what I said.

"Seth?"

My head snapped in the direction to which the voice came, it was sue. She was heading in our direction but stopped short when her eyes landed on me. Sue was silent for awhile before she finally spoke.

"Um Jake, aren't you supposed to be with Bella?" Sue asked raising her eyebrows.

"yeah but Emily offered to stay with Bella untill i comeback. Besides i need to talk to Sam right now"

"Oh, well in that case I'll talk to Sam afterward. I'll be taking my leave now." Sue gulped turning on her heel.

"Woah where's the fire? Hold on there Sue. Why are you avoiding me?" I stopped her.

"Mom didn't you say Sam wanted to talk to you. Didn't you say it was urgent you talk to him a minute ago?" Seth asked.

"Urgent? Whats wrong Sue? Why are you avoiding me?" I asked while closing the distance between us.

I arched a brow waiting for Sue's respond.

"No it's nothing, nothing. Its not that important. Jake must have something really important to say to him. It's ok I'll see him afterwards. This can wait." Sue whispered quietly.

"Sue what's going on? You seem really shaky? Is something wrong? You keep sidesteping my questions." I asked frustrated.

"No it's nothing really Jake. It's just your matter might be more important, and it's not really any of my business to interfere both you. So really you should go first." Sue said ignorantly.

"No you can just join us. Sam would like you there as well. Unless there's something you don't want me to know?" I asked irritably.

"Mom?" Seth asked after a long silence.

"No there's nothing for me to hide from you." Sue said hurriedly.

"Could have fooled me. Now come on." I said with a smile.

"I suppose so." Sue said stubbornly.

"Where is Sam?" I asked calmly

Seth took us to Sam and left the three of us alone.

"Sue… Jake?" Sam asked in surprise.

"Yeah…it's me" I said irritably waiting to know what I obviously shouldn't know.

" why? Is something wrong?" i asked but I didn't get any reply.

"Are you two keeping secrets from me?" I asked agitated.

"No its just im surprised to see you together, that's all. Besides I thought you going to accompany Bella?" Sam asked calmly.

" well Emily is with her." I calmly said.

"Oh good idea." Sam replied.

"How was the talk?" Sue asked breaking the silence.

"You knew about it?" I asked in surprise.

I thought I was the only one to know of the talk with the Cullens.

"Yes she knew. I told her about it before she left." Sam replied on behalf of Sue.

"How was it?" Sue repeated herself.

"Well the blonde was making a scene as you predicted." Sam said.

"I told you." Sue agreed with Sam.

"What about the rest?" I asked curiously.

Edward mainly I was curious to know about.

"Well the pixie and Carlisle were stubborn, but the big guy and Esme were on your side." Sam said smiling.

I knew I could count on both of them. Especially Emmet.

"And what about…" Sam cut me off before I could say his name.

"Edward, ugh that's why I called Sue." Sam said looking at the ground.

"What? Why?" I was confused and angry at the same time.

I wanted to know what he did badly.

"Calm down Jake. this is why I didn't call you in the first place." Sam said slowly.

"So that you could keep it from me!" I shouted at him.

My body started to vibrate more, and more with the passing minute.

"No! I would have told you a later anyway." Sam defended.

I was stunned into silence.

"What is it Sam?" Sue asked.

"Sue how is Bella, and is the baby alright? Edward was so confident when I was talking to him. He was sure Bella would go back to him." Sam said confusedly.

That didn't help at all to ease my body's vibration.

"Sue." Sam called.

She was silent again. Why does she keep doing that? something doesn't feel right.

"Bella well, Bella is healthy for now." Sue said calmly filling us with a false sense of relief.

"Oh thank god! What about the baby?" Sam said half full with relief.

"She will have complications in the future delivering the baby. It won't be a problem because we will do a Cesarean-section for her which will help the baby's chances of survival." Sue gulped out.

"A C-section? Complications? How can there be a complicaton when both of them are healthy?" Sam asked.

"Well I said Bella was healthy not the baby. The baby's development will be slower than normal." Sue said.

"what do you mean?" Sam asked.

" well the baby might start Kicking,and moving in the womb later on but not like how normal tribe babies do." Sue explained.

"Why?" Sam asked not happy with Sue's answers.

"Well because the baby has been exposed to freezing temperatures of the vampires a number of times it has had a detrimental effect on the fetus. It doesn't help that the baby has werewolf genes. The baby is literally freezing every time she allows them around her. Them touching her can harm the both of them. Right now we need to keep the cold ones away from her at all cost! It could kill the 2 of them!" Sue explained sadly.

"that I have all covered, no worries Sue. By the way, Is the damage permanent Sue?" Sam asked worriedly.

"Sue said while the baby is still the womb." I whispered hoping that it would satisfy his questions.

"Oh." Sam said quietly.

"Enough of that. What did you say about treat…"

Sam cut me off again.

"But wait.. Sue it doesn't make any sense! You said it will only effect the baby while it's still in the womb? What happens when it is born? Will it survive?" Sam asked the deadly question.

He made sense. Why didn't I think of asking that?

"Well the baby will survive." Sue said with obvious hesitation.

"Sue what are you hiding ?" Sam asked approaching furiousness.

"Sue what don't you want to tell me?" I asked, moving closer but she kept silent.

"Sue tell me damn it! I don't have time for this. Stop hiding whatever it is from me and tell me! I need to know! Do NOT lie to me! I have a right to know, if it's about my baby or Bella." I said stressing every word.

"Sue!" Sam growled reaching out to her.

Sue broke down into tears and fell to the ground on her knees. At that moment my heart shattered.

Sue said in between hicups, "I'm sorry Jake. We did our best. I'm so sorry!"

I was speechless and my mind was filled with mind numbing pain.

"Sue what is it? Spit it OUT!" Sam growled.

"The baby well i'm afraid it is paralyzed permanently." Sue whispered out.

I felt my heart stop then beat again. My traitorous heart. I felt my knees give in and I fell to them on the cold; hard ground. I heard Sam shout at me when Sue ran towards me, but then I couldn't hear a thing. I couldn't feel anything. My senses one by one shut down. It was as if I lost everything I had. I thought this was it, the end of me. Of that I was sure. Sam slapped me out of it and forced me to lean against a tree .Looking around me, I realized the sky was dark, it was filled with Lots of heavy dark clouds which was drifting near me.

It was then, that I started to despise myself for letting myself be the reason for my baby to be in the condition in which it is. But no matter what, i will love my child. The baby is a part of me, but more importantly a part of Bella. My baby was made out of love, Bella said she was giving me a chance when we created him or her. Which meant she loved me. I'm sure she is going to love the baby still but I don't know if she could forgive me for being the reason for all of this. I just couldn't take that fact that it's my fault. I ruined any chance of a normal life this baby would have had The baby got this way because of me. Because of my inability to keep the leeches away from child would be teased because of me. I should have been there for Bella. The fault was mine alone I should have been there for my child. I am not worthy of being father. I let my child down. I let everyone down. I'm useless. I felt the damn behind my eyes give out as the tears streamed down my face.

"Jake cut it out!" Sam snapped at me but the tears kept coming.

"Jake listen to me. None of this was your fault! Explain to me how it could be? You have done everything you could! just look at yourself! You have grown into a great a man. I'm sure Bella will be very happy to get an imprint who is wiling to give her the happiness she needs and a father who loves his child no matter how it is." Sam said with a small hardly visible smile. " You should be very proud of yourself!" Sue said hugging me.

"I don't know guys. I feel as if I have let down both Bella and the baby. The baby is going to have a tough time because of me." I said hanging my head.

"So what if the baby is going to have a rough life? The important thing is when the kid gets teased the whole tribe is going to be there defending her or him. When it is having difficulties moving around, he or she knows that it has a pack full of fathers that will be there helping him or her. When the kid is going through a rough time in school, he or she will know that there will be house full of mothers waiting at home with open arms to greet him or her. But most of all he or she will know that it has great parents that will be there for it no matter what happens and Jake you aren't going to be alone in this. We've got your back!" Sam's speech made me feel better and I had to thank him for that.

After a few words of encouragement from both sue and SAM, I was able to get back on my feet. Most of all I was ready to face the pack and Bella. Sue decided to head to the hospital and finish the undone task she left when she hurried for Bella and me. which leaves only Sam and me to go back to Emily's.

(At emily's house)

When I first arrived back at Sam's house, it was quieter than usual. Obviously Seth did a pretty good job in taking care of the pack "Wow this strange and creepy! It's like dawn of the dead!" Sam said. "Yeah I think it's because I told them not to make any noise because Bella was resting." I answered him. "Oh ok. Wow they actually listened. You could hear a pin drop in here!" Sam said in surprise. "I'll catch up with you later. I'm going to meet up with Emily. I miss her" Sam said turning towards the door. "She's with Bella in the guest room." I said calmly. "Thanks!" Sam replied.

I headed toward the living room and found the tv switched off. The boys were completely silent sitting in their seats. Now that's a sight! It was then that I got a feeling that something was wrong. Really wrong. I wonder what happened!"Hey guys." I said waving at pack flinched and looked as if I caught them with their hands in the cookie jar."Jake when did you get here?" Quil asked."I just made it home why are you all.."Embry cut me off with "Where's Sam?""He's with Emily. Why do you ask?" I asked surprised."Nothing it's just I thought you two were suppose to be talking." Embry said nervously."Yeah we did, and we're done talking now. why are you so nervous? What happened?" I asked worriedly." "Who? Me? Nah.. Who said I'm nervous? I'm not nervous. What makes you think I'm nervous?" Embry asked quickly jumbling the words together..

Ok, now that confirms he's nervous.

"Whoa. Hold on there Embry. What's wrong with you? As a matter of fact what's wrong with all of you?" I asked irritably when I noticed they were all acting strangely."Jake she's gone." Emily said out of breath as she came running from Bella's room. "She what? Why? how?" I asked cautiously. Everyone was quiet. "Seth what happened?" I asked him since I had put him in charge.

"Jake she, she.." Seth stuttered nervously."She left. We told her the truth and she didn't agree so she left to find the leech!" one of them snarled. "Leah!" Jared hissed at her. "What? He needs to know it. Good riddance I say Leah growled at them . Why would she leave? I don't get it. "What truth?" Sam asked. "She kept one asking what happened when she passed out, the boys said it best for Jake to tell her, but she was stubborn, and demanded to know so they told her. Bella eventually wanted to go and see her lover again." Leah said off-handedly. "Big deal? Dummy over there told her if she left not to come again . she left anyways and said she wouldn't come back" Leah said pointing out to Paul

"Bella no!" she shouldn't get near them again. No I'm not losing her again. I started running out of the house and was about to phase when I saw Bella's truck pull up.

"Bella!" I shouted while waving at her but for some reason she looked angry.

"Stop it!" Bella growled.


	27. Chapter 26 A lost lover, A lost sun

**Disclaimer: no, I don't own twilight and yes I hate Edward...**

**All hail Jacob! Team Jacob all the way...**

**This chapter is dedicated to jacobfan216, connect2tjb,zdra8351,jul5857,****IDTwilight,voidless dream,sissam93,IdaAreIda,AriesFireQn,Pegasus12654, foxitrue,Angelic95,Passion Black,I LUV SETH and my dearest loveable beta Blessedly Twilighted.. muaxx love ya. i would like to wish u to get well and healthy soon . btw get some tissue people this chapter is gona be full of argument and tears.**

**bella's pov : a lost lover, a lost sun **

I didn't waste time heading towards the Cullen's mansion, although it was quite uneasy to drive with my rather large baby bump. The road towards their house was different, not that the road changed or anything it just felt different. It was as if something inside of me was tugging at the depth of me pulling and pulling with as much force as it could muster to get me to turn back to La Push.

"Oh god Sam's story is getting to my head . That isn't good!"

Since I have been living with Emily I got use to Sam's stories or the "Quileute legends". Well Billy use to tell those legends back when I was a kid, speaking of Billy I haven't seen him in a while. Whenever Jake brings me back to his place, Billy usually is out it's as if he's avoiding me seeing Billy. Strange.

The drive to the Cullens' was much longer than usual. I climbed out of the truck as quickly as my swollen belly would allow and ran towards the house holding my stomach. I was shocked to see that the place was a mess, it was as if a bomb exploded or something . But the guys just said, it was a small talk.. This looks like a battlefield to me.. Oh god Edward? I hope he is ok, no wait.. He has to be ok.

"Edward?" I called to him but received no reply.

"Edward"

I called out his name repeatedly and continued to call Alice's name too. But nothing could be heard, not a single damn sound. They don't leave the house like this and just go out, well actually they have never gone anywhere like this .. Except when Edward left me…

Oh lord! No.. No This could not be happening again. They couldn't have left me again. Not after they knew how much it would hurt me! They didn't even say good bye. Why the rush to leave? Wait a minute…

**Flashback**

"_**Did the Cullen's come here?" I asked hoping they did.**_

"_**No they didn't. Well actually, they can't." Emily said looking at me.**_

"_**What do you mean they can't?" I asked in surprise.**_

"_**Well this is our territory, they aren't allowed to come after what happened."**_

**End of flashback**

Jake.. Why? Why do you have crush my happiness? It was all so perfect, his family, the pack, both Jacob and Edward.. For once everything seemed to be in place. No fighting, No disturbances. Both sides accepting each other . It was all a dream come true but he just had to send it to ruins. I didn't want to choose between the sides, both of them are my family. I love them both.

_**What if they don't comeback this time?**_

That question kept haunting me god knows for how long. As soon I came back to my senses, I knew what I had to do.

I jumped into the rabbit full of anger. I have to do this now. It's the only way that would make him understand. He did it once when he left the bike in front of the Charlie to get me grounded. And now this so that he could have me all to himself.

Well, he is certainly getting what he deserves. Truly his new friends are a bad influence on him and he claims that the Cullens are bad. He embarrassed me, by taking away my rights. By taking away my choice. Who is he to say I can't meet them anymore? Just because I'm having his baby doesn't give him the right to take control over my actions. I wouldn't even have this baby if it weren't for Edward who forced me to proceed with the pregnancy. He is supposed to be thankful to Edward not try to kill him. Ungrateful jerk!

(Emily's house)

As soon as I arrived at Emily's house, I parked the rabbit and hurried to meet Jake and give him a piece of my mind. But luck was truly on my side, I saw Jacob waving at me with a smile on his face. That jerk UGH!

I heard him call out my name.

"Stop it!" I shouted at him.I guess I failed to control my anger.

"What?" he asked dumbfound.

That is not going to work this time."Don't call me like that. You don't deserve it." I growled.

"Huh? Bella what happened? Why are you talking like this ?" Jake said softly.

"Don't play dumb Jake, I know you broke the treaty! I know you hurt him! Why? You know I love him, how could you do this to me?" I went straight to the point not wasting the long chat.

"Bella I did what was best for us." Jake said tone serious.

"Best for us? Best for you more precisely. You think I want you to hurt him? In what way is hurting him best for us? Tell me Jacob."Best for you is more accurate, with Edward out of the way. I need to depend on you all the time. Nice plan, former-best friend.

"Bella he could have killed both you and the baby! What do you expect me to do? Sit around and watch him doing whatever he likes like an idiot?" Jacob said raising his voice.

How dare he! He is the guilty party and he's acting innocent!"He could have killed me? But did he? Did he?" I repeated myself over and over. To justify Edward's actions.

He kept silent.

"He didn't because he knows what is best for me. Selfish. Just because im having your child doesn't mean you have control over me. Even Charlie doesn't have control over me. What makes you think you are?" I shouted. "What happened over there was an accident, he didn't do it on purpose. It's not even his fault and you hurt him, you could have killed him! I love him with all my heart Jacob, you know that."

I was about break down when I thought of Edward in pain..

"Bella please listen to what I have to say!" Jacob plead softly taking a step closer to me.

"Why Jake? …. It's clear that you hate Edward and want rid of him. You know what? Mission accomplished. They are gone! This time they didn't even get to say good bye to me because of your stupid treaty rules. I loved them Jacob. I loved Alice, Esme, Emmet all of them! I love Edward." I said as the tears traveled down my face.

I backed away several steps not wanting him anywhere near me. I don't want have a life with someone who has the intention to kill the love of my life.

"I told you billions of times before that they are my family. I need them alive Do you want me to go back to being a zombie again? Is that what you want Jacob?" I said scrubbing at the tears that kept stubbornly streaming down my face.

"Bella you have us. We are family too!" Seth said walking a step closer to me.

That's when I realized that Jake and I weren't alone. Everyone was here, the pack, Sam, Emily and not to mention Leah surprisingly.

"You guys are family, but you are just different." I tried. Paul cut in before I was able to finish.

"Different? Hell yeah we are different! We don't drink blood, we don't try to suck the life out of others." He shouted obviously angry. I was about to say that I needed both sides.

"Paul.. Please" Jake plead.

"No Jake somebody needs to teach her a lesson okay. Cause frankly I have had enough of her BS! Who does she think she is? " Paul shouted at Jacob.

How am I suddenly the bad guy?

"Look here vampire girl, listen to what he has to say, he is trying to keep you alive and you just keep pushing him away." Paul demanded.

Vampire girl? Trying to keep me alive? Hell no."I don't take advice from others" I snapped.

"Oh why you little…" Paul snarled.

"Paul! Shut up! Get out of here!" Jake shouted in fury.

"Jake, control your anger. You don't want to fight now." Sam calmly ordered.

"Jake As much I would like to disagree with that idiot, but unfortunately he's right. She is trying to walk all over you!" Leah ground out.

What the hell is wrong with all of them?

"Shut UP Leah!" Jared said threateningly.

"Shut it doorknob! What I was trying to say was stop being so damn stubborn! He's just trying to help you. You are supposed to say thank you not argue with him about going into the arms of danger! How dumb could you be? It's so obvious that you will just get hurt if you keep opening your arms up to the bloodsucker." Leah said to me.

"Edward will never hurt me!" I shouted.

_**How many times do I have to repeat myself?**_

"Yeah right.. Then explain why the baby doesn't get to have a normal life?" Leah snarled.

My heart stopped beating for a second.

"Leah!" The pack growled in unison.

"What? How did you know that?" I was could have told her? Sue and Jake weren't in the house and Emily couldn't have told her.

"Oh shut it guys, she's going to know any way! The guys eavesdropped over the conversation.. So what?" Leah said as if it were nothing.

"Doesn't that prove, he hurt you and the baby? Doesn't that mean Jake had the right to kill him!" Leah said backing up Jake.

"No! It does not! Not even if the baby died would he be able to have the right to kill Edward! No one has that right!" I blurted."I love Edward, yes I'll admit I do love Jacob as well but I love Edward more. All I ever wanted was to be with Edward. I know he loves me! Edward would never think of trying to hurt me!"

"Yeah he truly does. That explains why he left you?" Leah laughed.

"He left me because he didn't want me to get hurt. He wanted me to move on and have a normal life. It's not like what you thought." I told them the truth on why Edward left the first time.

"Bella you did move on. Why do you insist you still want him?" Seth asked softly.

"You won't understand. Nobody can understand. I need Edward like I need the air to breathe. Jake well, He's, he's." I started trying to unjumble the words to get them to come out correctly.

"A replacement? A consolation prize? A puppet? An idiot who puts you back together when another guy leaves you? Is that what he is to you?" Leah shouted.

"No! Jake would never be that." I shook my head in surprise.

"Yeah? Then what is he to you?" Leah asked intently.

"He's, He, well he's my best friend." I stuttered out.

"Really? I didn't know that best friends have sex with each other!" Leah shot.

Suddenly my chest became heavy and it gave me difficulty breathing. I tried to answer her but was unable.

"Leah! That's it! Guys get the hell out of this! This is my problem I'll settle it myself. I don't need any one of you to complicate it more!" Jake shouted coming out of the clearance with Paul and Sam.

I didn't realize they had even left.

"Oh so now it's down to this. You kick us out for her? Jake what the hell did she do? You're going to let her treat you like crap?" Embry said defeated.

"Dude we were just trying to help" Quil said calmly.

"I don't need help." Jake said sharply.

"But Jake." Seth tried.

"No Seth, everyone just leave. Please" Jake said shaking his head.

"Bella, honey if you think that I'm the one at fault then I'm sorry. Im sorry for being a jerk. I love you so much and it doesn't help when your safety is concerned. When there's a possibility of you being in danger I can't think. Hell I can't even breathe! I just lost myself when I thought I lost you and the baby! Please forgive me?" Jake asked hoarsely.

"Shut up Jake I don't want to hear anything you have to say! I've heard enough. Im leaving! Don't you dare come to forks and don't even think of calling." I said turning my back to him.

I can't accept him into my life again not after what he did.

"Bella! No wait." Jake said, gripping my hand.

"Let go of my hand." I said with my back to him.

I didn't want to see him.

"Bella I said I'm sorry and in your condition you shouldn't drive!" Jake said in an attempt to get me to stay.

"Sorry Jake? Is sorry going to bring them all back? Is a sorry going to undo all of your mistakes? You put me in this condition! I didn't ask you to knock me up! I was supposed to have a child with Edward not you!" I snarl blurted.

"But Bella, you said." Jacob said with his well of tears threatening to fall.

"Yes Jake I gave myself to you. But I told you that if it weren't for Edward's departure I wouldn't have moved on. I tried to move on but it just made Edward suicidal.. I couldn't let him kill himself. I lost my virginity to you that day, on that I day I thought I could have moved on and had a life with you, my personal sun, my best friend. Unfortunately I was wrong. When I was in a bad way after Edward left me you raised me up from the brink of death. I was thankful and grateful to have someone like you in my life but now I know that you aren't the same person I once knew and loved. You wanted to get rid of him so that I would come to you begging to make me better. No Jake that's not going to happen again. I'm sorry Jake, but it's over. They are not coming back so neither am I!" I whispered.

What I said was harsh but Jacob needed to know. As soon as I was done he relinquished his hold on my hand, I waited for him to speak but he uttered nothing. This was it, the end

I got into the car with teary eyes, and left. I felt my heart tear apart then. The invisible lines of mine that were connected to Jacob were ripped to pieces. I started to feel more and more empty inside the farther I went. I know I must have hurt Jacob, but I could never forgive him for what he has done. Why did he do it? Why Jacob? Why? I thought I could depend on you! I thought you were my safe harbor! I thought you would give me support! Instead you gave me nothing but hurt.

As soon I arrived home, I parked the rabbit beside Charlie's cruiser and ran into the house. I didn't knock on the door or reply when Charlie asked me why the rush? I just lost both of them today. The love of my life and the father of my child. One I left, and the other left me.


	28. Chapter 27 thanks, Dad

**Disclaimer: no, I don't own twilight and yes I hate Edward...**

**All hail Jacob! Team Jacob all the way...**

**This chapter is dedicated to jacobfan216, connect2tjb, zdra8351, jul5857, goldengirl62, vannesafanforeva and my loveable n hugeable beta ****Blessedly Twilighted****.**

**Okay! Hi folks! It's me jo again.. I got a good news and a bad news.. good news it's that things are going get more tense after this chapter. N then bad news is that the story is going to finish go n vote if u want a sequal…**

**Beta's/Note: Yes I am irritated with Bella. She just can't seem to make up her mind on anything. The pain in her heart she feels isn't for Edward but she won't allow herself to see it. **

**Bella's pov**

Thud, thud, thud. I heard footsteps coming nearer and nearer to my room but I didn't bother to look up. I waited, after a short while I heard a knock on my door. It was soft but still I could hear it. I remained silent. Then I heard it again but much louder.

"Bella open the door!" Charlie yelled pounding on the door.

I stayed lying on my bed though I knew that I should respond to him I just didn't have the energy to do so. He continued knocking on the door but this time he was pounding so loud on it the door was shaking.

"Isabella Marie Swan! You open this door right this instant or I'm coming in!" Charlie threatened.

As much as I wanted to ignore him, I just couldn't so I reluctantly unlocked the door. It's been days since I left my room; I haven't eaten, bathed, or talked to anyone. It was as if I created a barrier between myself and the world. By blocking everyone out I felt I could protect my child and myself. Protect myself from what I wondered repeatedly. Maybe I was protecting myself from myself. I don't honestly know but for these past few days I cried myself to sleep. I wept silently in hopes of no one hearing my inner turmoil. All of the things that had happened these past few months wore on me till I reached the point I was now at. I was the same as I was when Edward left me, but now do to my own actions I didn't have Jacob to put me back together. I finally pushed away the one person who truly loved me and protected me even when all I needed protection from was myself.

The pain wasn't going to go away. I lost both of them that day; one left me and the other I left. I lost myself that day as well. I felt now as if I was all alone. All the strings that held me and bound me together were destroyed that fateful day. Through that travesty I lost the Cullens as well as the pack. They were like my family different yet alike. The care, the love, the comfort, and the security that I felt were the same when I was with them. I miss it. I miss it a lot. If only Jacob hadn't destroyed everything!

I snapped out of my thoughts when Charlie shouted my name.

"Bella!"

"Um, uh sorry, I was just thinking." I said with my façade of a smile on my face.

I waited for his respond but I heard nothing so I took a minimal amount of effort to look at him in the face. There he stood in his uniform. I could see places where grey hair was starting to sprout, and wrinkles developing on his face as well as his warm brown eyes. I felt as if I hadn't seen him for a long time now. When I was still with _**Jake**_ I would be at Emily's place most of the time so we didn't really get to see each other. It was easy for me; it was not that I intentionally avoided Charlie though I must admit I didn't want him to know I was pregnant yet. Sue never fails to remind me to let him know at every prenatal appointment. I have yet to gain the courage to tell him. I'm still a child myself so I worry about what he would think. I'm not proud of my mistakes but I love my child. I fear that Charlie will no longer love me if he knew. I guess I just can't take the rejection from him too. Will he despise me or hate my child?

How will he accept the fact that it's Jacob's child? Will he too judge me?

A phrase from the last time I seen Leah flashes through my mind.

**_"Really? I didn't know that best friends have sex with each other!"_**

I didn't want to go through any of it alone; I was not ready for it. That was the reason why I started wearing Jake's shirts more often when I was in the same roof as Charlie. Just hoping that he wouldn't notice the bump. How was I going to explain to him that my pregnancy would last 15 months? Charlie certainly doesn't live in the supernatural world and would think me insane. As it was now I am 8 months pregnant. I still had a world of time. 7 months. I could still wait another 5 or 6 more months to tell him. I still had time!

"Thinking? You satisfied now that you have been locked up thinking alone in your room for days now?" Charlie questioned carefully with his cop face placed squarely on.

He waited for some type of response but when he failed to get one he continued "Bella what happened to you? You came running home with tears in your eyes that day and until now you haven't spoken a single word? Would you care to explain what is actually going on with you?" Charlie asked worriedly.

As much I want to throw myself at him and cry my heart out telling him of my pain I just couldn't.

"Are you planning on talking anytime soon?" Charlie asked irritably.

I stayed silent trying to think of a solution for this mess and I did finally. "You should be getting to work you're going to be late!"

"Bella stop! Ok just stop pushing me away! Your mom took you away from me 16 years ago. I don't plan on losing my daughter again. Either you or I'll talk!"

"Fine, if you want it this way!" Charlie shouted.

"Bella what happened? Just say something? Anything will do. Tell me are you hurt? Are you sick? Is it Jacob? Or is it_**him**__?_" Charlie asked at shot gun speed.

After sighing he started in again,_"_Bella, Even though you weren't quite comfortable at home with me when you first moved in I was happy because I knew YOU were happy. You were living a normal happy life. Enjoying staying here. It made me appreciate having you here more and more." Charlie ended taking one of my hands in his.

"Now you are back to how you were before Jacob!"

I didn't let him finish it. I just didn't want to hear _**his **_name again.

"Dad stop it. Stop it please! Don't say his name!" I shouted squeezing my eyes tightly together.

I wished that when I opened them everything that happened would reverse and it would turn out to all be a nightmare. I couldn't hold back the pain, every time I heard his name. My body was filled with the agony of being away from him and yet when I think back, I'm glad to be away from him because I couldn't bear the pain of being near the person who destroyed my happiness.

"Jacob? Why? What did he do? Did he hurt you?" Charlie's voice became deadly serious at the end.

I stayed silent.

"Bella tell me, don't make me go to Billy's to find out what happened and you know I won't hesitate on doing it!" Charlie said stressing every word.

"Dad I left him. I left him that day" I choked on my words as though there was something foul in my mouth.

"You what? Why on earth would you do that Bella?" Charlie was shocked but he quickly recovered and became worried when I didn't answer him.

"Bella did he hurt you?" Charlie asked softly.

How am I going to tell him that I left Jacob because he hurt Edward who accidently hurt my baby and me without him feeling that Jacob was justified? He would immediately side with Jacob, and I would have no one on my side.

"No dad nothing like that." I lied quickly.

"Then why?" Charlie asked persistently.

I closed my eyes again. Lies kept on stacking up on top of lies. I hated lying and now I was living a lie weather I wanted to admit it or not didn't matter. This is all because of _**him**__._If only he didn't love me! If only Edward hadn't left. If Edward hadn't left, I wouldn't have grown close to Jacob. Why? Why? Why did I let myself become weak? Why am I so weak that when I'm with Jacob it's as if we are soul mates? 'Edward is my soul mate not Jake.' I insisted to myself.

He's, he's my best friend, my personal sun not my lover. I realize that I feel safe around him, I feel as if I'm at home, a place where I truly belong. But do I really belong with or to Jake?

The times I spent with Jake months ago started coming into my mind flashes of them. I seemed to be at peace in his arms, I noticed him smiling brightly when we first saw an ultrasound and then I can see Emily and I cooking together for the pack. I look so happy, enjoying those times together. And then the images for that day came, the fight between me and Jake then to the Cullens empty house. Tears started slipping down my eyes when I realized that they were truly gone again. "He confronted Edward and they had had a big argument and then Cullens left." I whispered in agony.

Charlie took me in his arms when I started crying.

"They're gone?Again?" Charlie softly yet I could feel the shock in his voice.

"Oh bells I don't know what to say." Charlie admitted but that didn't seem to help me. I started crying even more when I realized that I may not see them again.

"Bells calm down. God I can't stand seeing you like this. You know what everything is going to fine. Just you wait and see. Everything is just going to be just fine." Charlie said soothingly as I clutched to him for dear life not too close though because I didn't want him to feel my baby bump.

"Just you wait till I get a hold of Jake! He's going to pay for upsetting you!"

I broke out of his embrace quickly when I heard that. . he shouldn't go there. What if Jacob tells him that Edward hurt the baby? What if the pack blamed the Cullens and let Charlie misjudge them? No. I couldn't allow that.

"Dad! No! No don't please?" I begged.

I was silently hoping he would change his mind.

"Why? Why not Bella? Are keeping secrets from me? You do know you can tell your old man anything right?" Charlie asked taken aback.

Should I tell him the truth? Am I ready to face this alone? As soon as I tell him, I'm sure Renee will know and how am I going tell them both that my child might be a shape-shifter? Renee would freak out!

"No dad no secrets. I know that it's just I want to handle this on my own." I lied.

Since when had become easier than the truth? Though I wished with all my heart that I could tell Charlie about everything. I don't like lying to him every day.

Charlie was about to something but then he didn't. he kept quiet, it looked like he was thinking and then he said gently but seriously."Bella I will let you handle this, but if I see one more tear from those pretty doe eyes I swear to you I will handle it no matter what you say! I am still your father. Do you understand me?"

Thank god that he was giving me the chance to handle this one my own.

"Yes I understand. Thanks dad." I said calmly hugging him.

"Any time Bells now I gotta go to work but I'll be back early today and then we can go out and grab something to eat. What do you say?" Charlie suggested cheerily.

What if someone noticed my bump? God that's going to be embarrassing! What if I bumped into Angela, or Mike Newton, or even Jessica Stanley?

Before I could voice my objections Charlie spoke."You know what, just get dressed we are going out. I want us to go out have father-daughter time since I just got you back ok?" Charlie said happily.

Father-daughter time? This doesn't seem like the best idea at the moment. What excuse could I possibly tell him? Nothing, absolutely nothing so I smile in reply.

"Good to have you back, kiddo." Charlie said hugging me.

**A month from the day Charlie confronted Bella ****(Bella is almost 9 months pregnant)**

Since Charlie's speech my relationship became better with him than it ever was. For the first time in my life, I actually got to know Charlie better. I didn't expect that spending time with Charlie would actually help me to get through the pain, but it did. Not that I managed to forget it, no it's just I was able to get my mind out of that misery. I am glad that I have Charlie to count on.

Days passed and up until now even with the help of Charlie I still have that horrible pain in my chest. Not a single day went by that I didn't have it. I still cling to the hope that someday the Cullens will return. Someday I will get to talk to Alice again. Someday I get to watch Emmett and Rosalie having small fights over Emmett's childishness again. Heck even someday having Esme and Carlisle give me parental advice. I hope beyond hope that Edward will come back and accept me and kiss my worries and pain away.

I caught Charlie watching the game alone at home the other day, not that it was something abnormal. It's just that usually he would be out at Billy's place to watch games at, or Billy would come over here to watch them. Since Harry's death, it had just been the two of them. They were so close. I wonder why they stopped seeing, and rarely calling each other. I have a feeling that it is because of me. After the day I left it's like both Charlie and Billy have been silent, not a single call or visit. But I didn't get involved in between them because I already had enough problems of my own. But that didn't stop me from going on with my life, with Charlie always giving me a hand I managed the hole of **_their _**absence from my life with much more less trouble. Charlie still worried about me because I haven't been getting much sleep lately nor do I eat healthy anymore.

Ouch. I winced in pain when something ran into me which brought me back to reality.

"Sorry." a small little boy said then sprinted towards his mom who has picking out a bottle of jam.

I just sighed and ignored the pain and dizziness as I went to the counter to pay for my purchases. I hope to get on with this and just head back home to get a nap in before Charlie gets back. I don't want him to over-react over my drowsiness. I'll just meet with Sue tomorrow I mentally thought to myself and carried on paying for the food. I took out my purse and tried to get the amount of money needed but my vision was blurry. I couldn't see the amount I was holding in my hand but I just handed it to the cashier hoping that what I gave was enough.

"Miss this isn't enough." I heard her calling out.

But before I could even try to respond to her I sunk into darkness.


	29. Chapter 28 What has she done?

**Disclaimer: no, I don't own twilight and yes I hate Edward...**

**All hail Jacob! Team Jacob all the way...**

**This chapter is dedicated to jacobfan216, connect2tjb, zdra8351, jul5857, goldengirl62,** **Ctulee06****, ****Sapphireuncovered0123****, ****Azula Felinae****, ****bmthespian****, ****Angelic95**** and my darling beta angel! **

**Hi guys its me jo.. sory sorry for da late update my beta is currently not feeling well so I had some probs but hey I done so yeah .. hope u guys like this chappie..**

**Charlie's pov**

"What has she done this time?" I thought to myself on my way to the hospital. I just got a call from there saying Bella was admitted in the hospital. I rushed my way towards the counter as soon as I parked my vehicle.

"Excuse me, is there a patient admitted here by name of Isabella Swan?" I asked the nurse who seemed to be an unfamiliar face around Forks. If it's one of Sue's friends, I doubt that I should state my purpose. While waiting for her reply I inspected the new face, she was thin with a pale skin to go along with and she had the curliest ginger hair I have ever seen. It almost looks like as if her hair is on fire. The moment she shifted her eyes from the computer, I saw her black colored eyes "yes there is sir ... and you must be ..." I completed her sentence "Charlie swan, her father".

"Ah yes... the doctor is waiting for you at room 103." She said with smile. "Thank you" I replied her and rushed my way towards Bella's room. I didn't even bother to knock before I entered the room. I just dashed in and there I saw Bella on the hospital bed just like the old times. I went closer to her to check whether she had injured herself without even noticing the doctor on the other side of the bed.

The doctor finally asked after staring at me for quite some time "excuse me sir, are you related to the patient here?" "Yes, I'm her father, Charlie swan." "And you are?" I asked his name right after I replied him. I didn't recognize him just like the nurse at the counter, both of them must be new to town I guess. I look at him from top to bottom; he had brown hair with black colored eyes. He wasn't muscular or skinny but he was pale just like the nurse just now.

"Ooh sorry for my bad manners, I'm David. My fiancée the nurse at the counter which you might have met and I just moved here. You're the chief right?" he said as if he read my mind." yes, welcome to forks. I'm sorry we have to meet in this kind of situation but good to know you..." I said sincerely while shaking his hand." ooh its fine... same here sir" he said with a smile on his paled skin. "What exactly happen? I couldn't see any traces of blood or injury? Is it internal damage?" I asked him in much more concerned tone even though I don't want to know the answer. Its not the first time Bella has been admitted in the hospital but this is definitely the first I don't see any injuries on her. Which makes me wonder what happened? What had caused her to be here?

"Err... no nothing like that actually. It's quite common for women like her to faint. She just needs to stop stressing herself, take in required vitamins and enough sleep. She would be back on her feet soon if she follows my order." He said after looking at his clipboard, probably Bella's health status. Well I know that Bella didn't take well the last time _**He**_ departed but this time its much worse. I didn't know it could be this serious, well maybe she would have been this way the last time if it weren't for Jacob. Dam I miss that kid.

"Ooh ...ok... u know it hasn't been easy for her lately because her boyfriend left her recently. I guess she didn't take it well as she did the last time." I said to the doctor, in the hope of trying to help him understand the situation or am I just saying that out loud to comfort myself? "ooh i'm sorry to hear that…that's bad, if she doesn't get over with that. I'm afraid it's going to affect the baby." He replied me. Wait what?

"The baby? What do you mean baby?" I asked him as soon as I pushed him against the wall with my hand still holding tightly on his collar. Did I hear that right? "Err… her baby... she's having a child? You didn't know?" he said with question mark on his face. "Do I look like I know..?" I asked in anger, when I realize the situation. It can't be true! Bella would never do...unless that Edward kid forced her... Oh my lord... it perfectly makes sense. The nerve of that kid... wait till I get my hand on him soon... very soon...

"Err... propobably not..." david answered trembling against my hold.

"How many months is she..?" I asked him wanting to know her current status." err... well...erm..."the doctor said mumbling something

"What's taking you so long? You are her doctor aren't you!" I shouted in rage while pushed him hard against the wall again." stop...stop... hold on... I would say roughly about 4 months but determining by the scan the baby looks much more mature. I suggest you to verify it with her doctor" what? 4 months! Isn't that when she was with Jake? And what the hell does he mean by her doctor?

"4 months! What do you mean her doctor! Then who the hell are you?" I shouted while my grips on him getting tighter. "Calm down sir...calm down…. The patient has records of having monthly appointments with a doctor here... soo u shou…" what? She did what? "Who is the doctor!" I asked rather loudly then necessary. "It's...its," David was about to say but then. "Sue?" I called her name slowly when I saw her entering the room.

"Yes... that's her" he said that after he heard sue's name but I didn't notice it." Sue what are doing here?" I asked as I'm surprised to see her here during her work time because usually she is cramped up in her room until it's time to her shift ends." I came here as soon I can when I heard the news." Sue said rather quickly and went to examine Bella.

I was shocked standing there, staring at sue when she came to check on Bella's condition as soon as she knew. That's just the nicest thing anyone has ever done. My gazed on her was cut short when I noticed her staring at the wall. My gaze followed her and I realized that I still hadn't put David down yet. I came back to my senses and shouted at him" what are you staring at! Get the doctor here right now! I want to have a talk with him..."

"It's her..." he said trembling in scared."Her? Who?" I asked him back. A female doctor? "Her" he said pointing at sue. "Sue?" I was surprised, shocked and angry all at the same time. I put David down on the floor slowly and ordered him to leave us alone." get out of here now"

"On my way sir..." he said quickly and was out of the room in no time. I didn't even know where to start. I just found out that my teenage daughter is pregnant and that my friend is well known of these all along and kept it away from me all these while "sue? You knew about it all along?" I asked slowly trying to keep my voice straight.

"I ...err...i have an explaination..." sue said looking down at the floor."Well I sure need one... go ahead" I said preparing for god knows what else to expect from Bella."Look Charlie...it's not what you think it seems like..." sue started by an excuse, I don't like how this is starting. "Do explain sue" I encourage her to go ahead.

"It isn't Jake's fault...trust me... he stood up for bella n her baby's sake against edward for the damage he has caused... but bella didn't listen to jacob and she and Edward went on further. I had warned her but she didn't listen." Sue said all too fast which made me replay what she just said a few times in my head and then jump to a conclusion.

"Wait ...hold on sue... Edward? Jacob? You are meaning to tell me that my daughter is pregnant 4months at the age of 18 and everyone knows about it except me?" I asked surprised and quite angry. "I thought Bella told you, I always reminded her to tell you the news soon" sue said rather factly. "Tell me the news? Sue, why didn't you tell me?" I shouted in anger when she replied me that way.

"I thought if it was brought up by Bella it would be much ..." sue said but I didn't let her finish."Easirer..? Well you thought wrong sue... it doesn't infact. It feels like hell when you got to know that you are the last person to be informed of your teenage daughter's pregnancy" I shouted releasing all my anger. She stood there looking at me with tears swelled up in her eyes. I always had a soft spot for girls well in this case a woman.

"So you are telling that all these are caused by Edward? I asked after I thought thoroughly all the details sue said. In another way trying to change the subject from getting sue more teary." unfortunately yes..." she said while looking away.

"So is this why they left?" I asked. "Yes…" she answered. I didn't know what else to say. I was flabbergast and standing there a while like an idiot. Not knowing how to react to everything that just happened.

"Charlie..." sue started, while she came nearer to me but I...

"Stop ..." I said slowly while moving away from her.

"But...Charlie..." she started but I shook my head.

"Just stop right there sue... i need some time alone to figure out some stuff." I said headed of to exit the room.

"Ok... but when you need me... just call" she said before I was about to exit.

"Hmm... why were you when I needed to know all these?" I replied her back while staring at her.

"I..." she started but I stopped her not wanting to listen to her excuses anymore."Save it"

**(At patient's bay)**

I sat at the patient waiting bay; it was not crowed nor empty just a few people passing by. I didn't notice anything around me since I was so wrapped up thinking of my only daughter's future. Bella... what have you done this time? I can't believe she was so stupid in giving herself to him! Of all person him! I told her over and over don't trust him... he's not good for you. Doesn't she ever once listen to me? No! Stubborn as always just like Renee.

I was very angry at Bella and her actions but on the other hand when I got to know that Jake was involved in this. I felt terrible. I always knew he had crush on her and I thought they were actually dating a few months ago but I can't seem to accept the fact Bella cheated on Jake. What does she even see in that Edward kid?

My thoughts stopped when I heard a familiar voice.

" what room is Bella swan addmited" he asked. He as in a young man. Tall, tanned and shirtless. I knew it right away it was who.

"Sir ...im afraid you are not dress properly to go in there" the receptionist replied to him rudely. So I got up from my place and went towards him to settle things out and to control his outburst."."Just tell me the damn room number lady?" he shouted back at the receptionist"jacob...calm down"I said while gripping his shoulder to calm him." Charlie?" he said surprised.

"Come with me, I'll bring you to her" I said looking at him. Either way I'm sure he would have done anything to see her. "But sir..." the receptionist tried her best to sound strict but she failed.

"He's with me, I'll take care" I said waving at her while bringing Jake along with me. "Jessh... did you ran from reserve jake?" I asked tried to stir up a conversation. "Huh? What makes you say that?" he said in shocked which meant I caught him off guard. "Look at yourself... you are gasping, shirtless and not too mention sweating" I said after taking a good look at him." ooh that…that's a long story.." he sighed." anything to make me relax.. I'm ready to hear." I said, didn't want you end the conversation already. Besides I need something to make my mind busy from thinking of Bella's situation.

"Err. The rabbit broke down on the way here... soo... I ran the rest of the way here" he said matter factly which surprised me like hell. He ran all the way? Just for Bella? God this kid.. " my god! The determination that you kids have nowadays .." I replied him.

"Anything for her..By the way how is she?" he asked, in an instant his face turned serious. "She's fine ..." I said lowly "as well as the baby" I added as an afterthought besides he already knew about the baby.

His face was priceless, pure shock ness with his mouth wide open but I tried my best not to laugh. "Sue told me, actually the new doctor told me. Well it's a long story actually it's a pretty long story" I said after thinking back all the incidents. "Anything is worth listening to clear up my mind sir..." he said with a smile on his. He reminds me of myself the one I lost when I lost renne and Bella together.

"You know Jake... sometimes you remind me of myself, the once very energetic, care free, live of the party Charlie. The one that has disappeared a long time ago, ever since renne left. Both of us has been left by the girl we loved for a better guy. Don't you think?" I said the last part while looking at his face and he didn't look convinced.

"Don't give me that look... I'm serious try asking your dad. He will tell you about me more. He was there when I started dating Renee"

"Speaking of Billy how is he? I haven't heard from him in a while? Is everything alright there?" I said when I was reminded of Billy.

He stayed silent, something didn't felt right. "What happened? Come on you know, you can tell me anything." I said trying to get him say it. "Nah... its just ... we haven't been getting along lately. It's been a while since I had a conversation with him" he said with his head hanging low. I felt terrible, when I thought about his situation. "hey cheer up; I'll try talking to him later" I said trying to cheer up the mood."No...no..It's ok.. You don't need to do that.." he said rather quickly " no, I insist Jake besides I'm going to your house anyway" I said when I made up mind to visit Billy and actually wanted to talk to someone. Besides I could send Jake home with me.

"Why?" he asked looking not pleased at all. "What you mean why? To send you back home" I replied him. "Ooh no...No it's ok I can go back myself. .no need to burden yourself" he said while shaking his head in disagreement.

"Nonsense! You're like my son Jake. By the way how are you going to head back reserved ? I thought the rabbit broke down" I pointed out to him."Yeah...yeah it did.. But Embry fixed it..." he said as an after thought "I thought it broke on the way here?" I said in surprise cause if the rabbit is broken on the way here how did Embry know? Did he call Embry? Wait I thought he ran here? How did Embry know? "Yeah, but Embry was accompanying me" he said while scratching the back of his head.

"Ooh ok... then I'll just drop you drop you off at the place where you left your rabbit..." I said that when I knew I couldn't win the argument at the end."Err.. I don't think that's necessary... embry will be picking me up here" he said slower then usual."Ooh...that's good well planed" I said while raising an eyebrow.

**(A few minutes later after they arrived at Bella's room)**

Jake immediately rushed towards Bella and touch her cheeks and took a sit beside her while hold her hand. I stood at the very end of the bed when Jake ran over to her side and just stared at her. I didn't realize he was crying until I heardweep. His eyes were teary and he was caressing Bella's cheek. If it was any other day I would have got my shot gun and chased Jacob but now... I didn't feel like doing so. So I just stood there watching him, that's when I realize that he was talking to Bella. This made me curious so I eavesdrop on his conversation.

"Bella. I'm sorry" Jake said while still caressing her cheeks but tears was starting to pour down. I would have never expected Jake to be in this condition not in a million years. He wasn't the cheerful, funny young man that I knew. I was expecting a friend who is sad and concern of his best friend but instead saw a young man caressing and crying over a girl.

That's when I realize, it was more than friendship between them. It always was it's just they didn't realize it until now. Well at least one of them did. I feel bad for the other even though he's not my blood but still I've grown to love him as mine. I couldn't stand watching him be this vurnable.

"You really love her don't you?" I asked him softly.

"yes sir I do..." he said when he paused from crying and just continued to stare at her." if only she realizes that" I whispered to myself.

"What?" he heard it? "Nothing...nothing…" I said quickly. This made him look at me for a while.

"So how long are you going to be here?" I asked trying to change the topic. "Emm... as long as I am allowed" he said looking at me with those scared eyes. "Aww Jake, you know you can be here as long as you want. You're her best friend after all. "I said trying to. He smiled at me when I said that. "Thank you sir, I was afraid how you will react when you got to know about it" he said after a long smile. "Hmm... yeah I understand. Well I can assure you, it was petrifying. It's not easy when you get to know your daughter is pregnant at 18 but then again she is carrying my grandchild. Either way I have to accept the baby as well as the father of the baby. "I said not very pleasing but yet approving.

"I'm glad you accept us, Bella thought you were going to freak out" he said with a smile and turned his gaze at Bella. "Yeah, I did freak out but… wait... accept us?" I said when I realize what he actually meant. I couldn't believe my ear, I was much more shocked then I was before. Jake with his mouth wide open look at me as if his head was about to be chopped off. "She didn't tell..." Jake started but I cut him. "Nope ...she didn't get to the part where you're the father" I said and added a after thought" but I would be happy to hear your side of the story, jake..." I said with vicious smile even though I liked him but I couldn't accept him as the father of my grandchild maybe in the future but not now… he's still in school.

"I ...err... well..." he was mumbling for awhile until I asked "when?"

"The day she left" he said looking at the floor. Ok now that was a surprise. I don't didn't know what to respond, whether to like the fact that Edward is not the father it or hate Jake for taking my daughter.

But look on the bright side, I and Billy were going to be related and who else is much better for Bella if not Jake. It's strange that I would have freak out or scolded him by now for his actions but then this wasn't a normal day either so yeah this is absolutely a better news.

"Sir... i...err. Sorry for..." Jake said when I stared to smile to my ears. "Relax... I'm not mad at you. Well I should be but then a lot of things have happened and this wasn't soo bad." I said with a smile still on my face. His face lit up in an instant and he hugged me. "

"Alright...alright cut it off..."I said while pulling myself back from him and I still saw a smile on his face. " thank you" he mouthed "take good care of her" I said softly. He nodded in reply. The was a few minutes of silence and I broke it off "well I'll be off now. Will you be ok ..?" I said before leaving. "Hmm... I think I can handle it" he said after taking a glance from Bella. I walk out of the room and went to my cruiser. When I got in my vehicle I made up my mind to meet Billy before going back to work.


	30. Chapter 29 Black Swan

the scorching sun, the smell of composting leaves, the sound crackling branches and rustling 's leaves, there's only one place where i know i could find those. yup. it's La push, oh the hidden wonders of the forest and the view of beach. i could almost taste salt in the air, when i stick my head out of the cruiser. its good to be back here, the last time i drove on this road was when Jake left. I'm surprised that nothing had change since then, i noticed that when i arrived at billy's, like literally everything is exactly where it was.

i knocked on the door and waited. i could have just made myself home by walking in but i stopped from doing so when i noticed the steps of house were covered with newspapers and rolled-up flyers. there were envelopes and bills poking out of the front door, for a second there my mind almost deceived me into thinking billy had secretly moved somewhere but then that wouldn't make much sense. but the house really looked like as if the Black's had secertly moved away in the night.

i knocked on the door again, still no reply. I twiddled the door knob slowly opening the door peeking through the slowly growing crack, inside it was dark, almost black. i know, its impossible? how the heck could it be dark when the sun is burning outside. i took a few steps carefully as if i was waiting for someone to attack me suddenly. when i was convinced that it was safe, i let my guard down and i took in the surrounding. the first i noticed was, the TV set was on which means i don't need to kick billy for keeping his move a secret. second,i think billy is still in the Halloween mood, cause his current house state could definitely beat the Newton's haunted house any day of the week and three is that a spider web?

i froze the second heard scuffling noises from the kitchen. i stayed still for awhile and then shouted "billy? are you there?" and added "can you hear me?" as an after thought and stayed froze at that place. then for the next few minutes it was complete silent untill i heard...

"who's that?" i exhaled loudly when i heard billy's reply, i wasn't aware that i was holding my breath that long. "now billy, i don't think it's been that long for you not recognize me ?"i took a seat on couch after clearing the mess a bit. i started flipping the channels to find if any of it was having a game on now, when i found the remote. i heard the sound of wheelchair across the hall, it was slower then usual. but.. i kept on waiting.. waiting to see the look on his face.

"oh charlie... its you.. im sorry.. i ..i wasn't expecting you to be visiting on this time of day..what brings you here?"billy's eyes were wide open when they met mine, he looked beyond surprised and he wasn't the only one who was livid. when i said i was waiting to see the look the on billy's face. i wasn't expecting him to be welcoming me with a baseball bat. the day keeps on shocking me.

he placed the bat at the side of wall and came closer to me, his face was having the apologetic look. i didn't want him to feel bad, it's not his fault. it was mine actually for dropping by without a call, i should have expected that actually when he didn't answer me back just now. but still i cant stop myself from being shocked that he couldn't recognize my voice anymore. "err.. yeah. trust me i wasn't planning my trip either. it's just all of things happened today and.. you know what .. lets just say, i came over to have a chat with old friend" i said while clasping my hands together. i looked at him with a smile trying to let him know that i was not offended by his actions and that nothing went wrong.

i continued to stare at him. i could see a few patches of graying hair here and there and wrinkles around those black eyes. i could swear there are some sagging skin on those cheeks of his along with his tired eyelids. he is still the same old billy though he is different, i wonder if it's because he's aging.. if so.. am i going through the same path as he is? so many questions, so little time.i came back to my senses when billy shouted my name." ooh..ok.. let me grab some beer for us " billy said that with his are-you-sure-you-are-back-on-earth? tone.

"yup.. that would be nice.." i said to assure him that yup, charlie's back. hopefully not leaving again. did i sounded too cheerfull there just now?

"ah ha..?" billy said while giving me the eye. oh lord what did i do now? "billy.. is there something wrong ?" well obviously there is something wrong? can't a guy get some break? geesh..

"thats what i was about to u ask u"? he said looking at me in the eye when he placed the beer on the table. what does that suppose to mean?

"what do u mean?" i asked while giving him the i-don't-have-a-single-clue-on-what-you're-trying-to-say look. if it's about my spacing out/talking to myself thing. dammit! i knew it! stupid conscience! i should seriously stop talking to myself anymore, clearly it's causing more trouble then solving any.

he stared at me long... real long before he spoke." well..look at u charlie.. u are ecstatic.i haven't seen you like this since ... erhh.. did you won the lottery or something?" yup...definitely too cheerful .. you can stay conscience. erghh charlie get a hold of yourself. ok calm down. why was i happy again? the wheels in head starting clicking. tick..tock...tick..tock...tick..tock... BINGO! Jake and Bella are having a baby together with that Edward kid out of the picture.

although, its quite weird that i haven't had the urge to get my gun and start chasing Jacob around for getting Bella pregnant. maybe.. it''s because im overwhelmed with joy with the fact that Bella has finally move on from that Edward kid. that he's never going to get the chance to hurt her again cause i know that Jacob isn't going let that happen neither do i.

" ooh that, u noticed it huh?.. well to tell you the truth billy. i'm preety much on cloud 9 right now cause finally our wish came true and no nothing to with the lottery." i smiled widely at him before i took a sip.

"u finally proposed sue? i told ya she would accept u!"i spurted out the beer i was drinking , the second i heard that. i turned my head facing billy at the side and started shouting at him."oh god no billy!..no! no! " and added "don't ever mention her name" later.

"huh? what do you mean?" billy asked. i could sense shock from his voice, well yeah he wouldn't have expected that. nobody would have. arr...err.. how do i put it?

"i don't love her anymore" well that was easy.

" ah ha.. ?" well, so much easy? crap. metal note : never ever try to lie to your best friend, well not in his face.

" im serious billy ..don't ah ha..me.." i hissed at him.

"do you seriously think i would fall for that ? nice try charlie.. but i still cant forget you being .err.. what's that word Sarah use to use..." he pretended to think and then continued "ah yes.. **smitten.. **" stressing the last word.

"i w-a-s not!" i say this triumphantly, as if it was the smartest thing to do. but.. i regretted it after billy said." yes sir, you were.. and i believe still is..."

"no way billy! not after what she did. its true i was in deeply in love with her but not anymore and the chances of those feelings coming back are .. lets just say impossible."yup..not after her betrayal.. i could never forgive her. she was suppose to be my friend and friends don't keep secrets from each other.

"nah.. couldnt be that bad.. come on tell me what happend .. i bet it's just you over-reacting" billy accused me. clearly not knowing the whole story.

"she lied" i said trying to open up._ i tried to collect my thoughts_.

"lied? well probably cause she didn't have any other choice .." _i tried rearranging my words_.

" billy.. why are you taking her side? and she had alot of time to confess to me the truth "_i tried to relive the moment_.

"I'm not taking any sides. what did she lie about?" he sounded tense and his breathing was shallow.

"about my daughter's pregnancy and it seems everyone knows about it except me" _but clearly i couldn't_.

there was a long silence before i heard billy caught his breath again. maybe he thought Bella had told me about the pregnancy? maybe he feels guilty for not telling me about it? maybe ...

" Bella is pregnant?" the moment i heard that. my heart raced, faster than ever. they kept it a secret .. from us. sue didn't tell billy either? they kept it from us? _sue how could you_...

"Jake didn't tell you?" i asked softly.

"no.." he shook his head at first and then stopped "he knows?" he asked me, in the same tone i used towards sue. Betrayal,betrayal and more betrayal. they deceived us.

" billy... there's something u should know" he should know. he has the right to know. they deceived us. how could they? i tried my best to tell billy the whole story. i didn't take it well, i hope he does.

"answer the question first!" he shouted. that was the first time he ever did that. his eyes were red. he looked sad and yet angry at the same time. i have never seen him like this, i guess this is how i looked like to sue just now. a beast full of anger, ready to kill anyone that gets in its way.

"yes he knows ..." it came out like a whisper .

"how long has he knew this?" he sensed the guilt in my voice i guess maybe that's why his voice was softer than before but that doesn't mean he didn't look angry. how am i going to tell him? the major question is: How is he going to take the news?"

the moment i heard that Bella was going to be mother, i couldn't believe my ears. my little girl, my angel.. she's going to have a child of her own. i couldn't accept the reality that she is growing up, in my eyes i still see the small fragile girl who keeps on slipping at every chance she gets. where is that girl now? i miss her smile that makes my worries go away. i miss her laughter that makes my world go round. i miss our conversation eventhough it doesn't last long. i miss my daughter and i need her back.

when i look at her now, i don't see my daughter anymore.i couldn't recognize her anymore. bit by bit my Bella was fading away and i didn't realise it. she became a stranger right infront my eyes and i was unable to do anything from stopping._. i lost her again._ i was devastated, angry, disappointed...not just in her but in myself. **where did i go wrong? **

"well billy I'm not sure." by then i was up on my feet and said "but I'm guessing he knows it from the start since hes the father "

" hes.. what?" there was a sudden drop in his voice. by the look on his face, it seems he is surprised by the news as well.

so did i, when i got to know that Jake was the father. i was happy, yup extremely happy to welcome Jake to the family. i would gladly accept Jake and Bella's relationship eventhough they went over the limit. i was wiling to put that aside because i know that Jacob was the one for Bella. he had feelings for her since he was a kid, and finally Bella accepted him. i was beyond relief that Edward was out of the story. that alone made my day, my week, my month. no more Edward. a Edward-less life is what Bella needs.

"yeah.. ain't that exciting?we are gonna be grandpa soon, its like just yesterday those two were toddlers and soon enough we'll be in laws.." yup.. no more Cullens. just like old times.

" no!" by now, he reached a roar. his voice echoed long and loud. the world seem to stop spinning for a few minutes. it took me awhile to understand what just happend, but still i wasn't clearly getting the whole picture.

"billy? is everything ok?" my voice went quiet and soft again. almost not wanting to know the answer eventhough _i need to_ but ..._i don't want to_..

"no.. no its not charlie. it never will" he said facing the floor while shaking his head. he said slowly taking his time.

"what do you mean?" i asked blankly. as all i could see now is a plain white space.

" charlie.. i respect our friendship and no matter what we are still going to be friends" he said slowly as if I'm going crazy. or maybe he is trying to let me know something. then he stopped speaking for what seemed like forever.

"billy, i dont like where this is going?"i broke the silence that i hated. there hasn't been silence like between me and billy, never except now.

i heard another series of deep breaths and long exhales from billy before he started to speak. "neither do i but you have to know that. i don't approve Jake having a relationship with Bella but as i see its..." but i didn't let him finish

"what do u mean billy? you and i both were hoping those two will end up together. what are you saying now?"

"charlie.." he took in a deep breath and continued "that was before Bella broke my son apart..i could never forgive her for wat she had done."

i heard sound of something shattering, it sounded like glass though it wasn't glass. it was some more valuable. something that couldn't be replaced. it was actually the memories that we cherished and the future that is lost.

i swalloed the pain and said. " but billy.."

"enough charlie.. i could never forgive myself if Jake was hurt again.. do you know, how hurt he was when she chose that jerk? do you know how miserable he was when she left him?all those things she did, It tore him apart, and it was like he was a shell of his old self. he wasn't the Jacob that we once knew. " his voice erupts,it does so with more force than either of us expected.

for a secon there it felt as if the whole room gotten cold or something frozen settles over the house. like a huge cloud just passed in front of the sun.i can see it coming, everything is about to shift and change. the saddest part is, i couldn't do anything about it .

"look billy i understand that but.." i tried to let him know that i went through it as well. when_** he**_left, Bella turned into a zombie. so i know the feeling of a father seeing your kid suffering right infront of your very eyes but all you could is watch. there is nothing you could do other than that, that feeling of being unable to help. to protect. to save. your own flesh and blood. it haunted my nights. never would i have imagine in a million years to be in that situation, never would i excepted myself to be bad father .

"no charlie u don't! u don't understand my pain.. cause u never had to force him to eat. u never saw him locked up in his room all day and having struggle to get out of bed? you didn't see the way he looked like a walking corpse for gods sake when she left! do you know, how helpless i was? he hardly ever spoke and when he did it was about that girl nothing else. he blamed himself for her departure and for all her problems. i couldn't help him eventhough he was right infront of me. i thought i was going to lose him charlie! my son.. my only son. you don't have the slightes idea how that feels. you don't have a clue how much he loves her. how much he is willing to sacrifice for her. how much she means to him. he puts her before himself , before everyone! and what does she do? runs of for that jerk! how the hell do you expect me to accept her after all she did? "

he said looking at me, i was still looking at him but ...in a state of shock. i don't get it at first, he said as if everything was obvious. i still don't get. but when i started to get it, i hear it coming the way you hear something approaching from far. the way you feel the train under before you could actually see it. at first, my view blurry so i blinked for a few seconds and i felt salty water rushing down my cheek. i was shocked, not for what billy said but the fact that all these things happened right infront my eyes and i was blind. **blinded by what?**

love? for sue, the very person whom i use to admire and love to be with. happiness? to have Jake be with Bella and changing her back to the Bella she use to be. hatred? for the Cullens for they stole my daughter and hurted her. why ? why wasn't i aware of all these incidents? i couldn't stand to see billy being this hurt, and to exacerbate the situation even more it's all my fault. but the real victim here is Jacob, oh god. i love that boy as if he's my own son, i was so glad and happy that he was the father of my grandchild. Bella what have you done?

"billy.. i .. i'm sorry.. for everything that Bella has done.. you know she didn't do it on purpose. she could never even think of hurting Jacob"

"not on purpose? charlie! that girl practically left everyone for that **lover boy **of hers. she didn't care for Jacob and not you either, if she did. she wouldn't have left all of us for **him**.she is nothing but selfish ever since she started being around the cullens. no matter what you are going to say nothing is going to change my mind not after what she had done all these while, she changed my son for gods sake. i cant even recognize my own kid anymore, he isn't how he use to be and its all her faut. i don't want her anywhere near my son anymore same goes for her child."

"billy..please.. think about it more rationally..it's their life we are talking, its their future with their child and im sure both of them has matured more since their last meeting. don't you think Bella could another chance. think about it billy, do you want your grandchild to not be with it's own father? do you want it to grow up that way." i know I'm pushing my out on this, after all that happened. i gotta do this if not for Bella it's for the baby.

"i would rather let it grow up without ever knowing it's father then to be a fatherless child. im not ging to take any more chances. i cant afford to lose my son again. I'm sorry charlie."a bullet through my heart, the time stopped moving so did my heart. the light was dimmed,the sky was dark, hope is forever lost.

"_no.. no.._

_i understand..._

_I'm sorry for bothering you..._

_i'll leaving now..."_

i tried my best to keep my emotions together but i failed. when i said that, it came out like a recorded speech. like a song playing from a radio or like a voice-mail that you hear on the phone.

i took my keys and left from there, i didn't even look back. neither one of us said anything to each other, guess that means goodbye for good. as soon as the engine is warmed up, i drove back through the same path i came just now. only this time, i felt empty inside. like something was ripped of out of my body. alot has happened today, i lost my best friend, the person that i believed in lied to me and my grandchild is going to grow up without a father but my mind was blank.

where did i go wrong? i thought hardly but was distracted by something that was red colour in the road. i couldn't see it clearly what it was through my watery eyes but before i could wiped off my tears...

something hit the car and i lost control.

**(crassshhhh ...) **


	31. Chapter 30 Please,comeback

**Disclaimer: I don't own twilight and yes I hate Edward...**

**All hail Jacob! Team Jacob all the way...**

**This chapter is dedicated to jacobfan216, connect2tjb, zdra8351, jul5857, liv2read2luv,IdaAreIda,Zayide,Spikes-Kitty-Kat-Tiff,Ctulee06 and Vaneesa85**

**Hi guys, and before you start yelling...i'm sorry for not updating sooner, i'm having my final year exams soon so my mom banned me from using the computer so yeah, once again I am very very sorry.**

**A very special thank you to my wonderful beta, she's been kind to me and willing to help me although i'm kinda of a troublesome.. love ya Dazzler916 :)**

**The words in italic and bold are from the chapter "Lost Love, Lost Sun"**

**The words in italic are jacob's thoughts to himself.**

_**Jacob's pov**_

Beep...beep...beep..

It was all that could be heard in the room. It isn't just the sound of the machine next to me. It's almost as if Bella is trying to repeat herself to me yet again...  
_**  
"I'm sorry Jake, but it's over. They aren't coming back so neither am I!"**_

Since that dreadful day till now, the pain is still there and it still aches, it still come it's over? Does it not exist anymore? How is that possible?

Didn't you feel it? When you left me, didn't you feel as if the strings that kept us connected were being stretched away so far that they finally snapped? It's liked emptiness is taking over our place in the world.

Do you feel that?

I wonder, but that's impossible because you don't even know if it exist do you?I blame myself for not letting you know sooner.

_Maybe then you wouldn't have left me_

But then at the same time I am glad that I didn't.

_You might hate me for that very reason too..._

"How is that possible?" I whispered in her ear before sinking into the chair. I grabbed Bella's hand and pressed it against my cheek. I wanted her to feel the warmth of my skin. I wanted her to know that I was still here.

"How? Bella please tell me how?" I pleaded. I was beginning to break down.

"Our bond is stronger than that. You can't give up on me no." I stammered. I didn't hold back my tears this time, I let them spill over...so they roll effortlessly down my cheeks.

I was immobile for awhile while, crying my heart out for the woman I much beauty, so much life...so much for getting my hopes up.

It still hurts Bella…

_**"Best for us? Best for you more precisely..."**_

I thought you loved me..

"_**Shut up Jake I don't want to hear anything you have to say! I've heard enough. I'm leaving! Don't you dare come to forks and don't even think of calling"**_

How did even have it in your heart to say those things?

_"__**Sorry Jake? Is sorry going to bring them all back? Is a sorry going to undo all of your mistakes? You put me in this condition! I didn't ask you to knock me up! I was supposed to have a child with Edward not you.."**_

What am I suppose to do? "Like a person who doesn't know me, as if nothing ever happened. If you forget everything what do I do" I said, as my eyes were shut tight.

There's a continuous ache through my body and it won't stop.  
Please wake up and tell me that it was just a bad dream.

Please...

The distance between you and I has grown since then.  
Why did we fight?  
Why were we like this?  
Did the lights go out?  
I thought we loved each other.

It feels like the walls are starting to cave me, time froze the moment you left...I know my presence here may just be annoying to you but I can't help it.

I'm sorry...I'm sorry, but I can't.

I can't erase you from my life. I keep thinking about you.  
I need to see you so bad. I can't even sleep at night  
I miss you so much.

I just can't keep going on without seeing you.

"Yes you heard me right. I can't control myself from not being able to be near you. You have no idea how hard I've tried but I just can't." i said as my voice was getting weaker.

"Since the day you left I have been constantly paying you a visit secretly despite I know it will upset you. I can't live a without you, Bella. It's like a whole is burning in my chest when you're not around. Things are getting out of hand. But I had to be here not just for you, but for the sake of our child too." I continued on.

"The child we created together is the only existing thing that is proof of our..no..my love for you. And yet, I failed again. Our child won't have a normal life because of me. I have failed as a father and a lover... but then I can't help but wonder if I was ever considered a lover to you?" I said while tracing the outline of her hand.

My head rested on the hospital bed. I didn't realize I've been talking to her this long, but I know it must have been the longest time Bella and I have ever talked. Not that we haven't had a long conversation,we had...but it was more of her talking and me listening to her but this time, its the other way around. It feels good.

It feels good to finally get it all out.

_If only it was this easy when you were awake. If only you stopped yelling and took the time to listen to me that day. If only I was in your heart and not him..then maybe...you wouldn't be like this right now._

"I want you to know that I promised myself that I won't, even for a second cause you any pain but what I have done was only to protect you, it wasn't a choice. I really hope you can understand that."

You don't need to apologize to anyone or even come to back La push. Just let me be with you. Don't let go of our string.. Don't resist our bond. You know it's still there...just comeback. Come back to me. It's all okay now, we can start over I promise...it will be as this big mess was just a really bad dream. Please Bella.

My head snapped up when I heard the door open. To my surprise it was Seth, followed by was a long pause before either of us spoke.

"What brings you here Seth?" I asked, taking the time to regain myself.

"Well, Bil.." Sue cut him off before he could finish.

"It's Sam, he sent us to bring you back home." She said.

"Home? Why now?" I asked unsure of why they came here to tell me that. "Didn't Embry inform him that I was going to the hospital?"

"Well.." before he finished it Sue interrupted again.

"There were sightings of the cold ones and... well Sam wants you to go and be with Billy until they **hunt **them down"

"Wait, what? How long ago did this happened? How come no one told me about this sooner? Seth, do me a favor and ask someone to move my dad to Sam's place." I said.

"No! No! no...I mean you can't" Sue seemed very hesitant.

"What are you talking about?" i asked , as heat started rising within me.

"I mean..Sam specifically asked you to be with Billy. Right now." Sue said in a very cautious tone

"No that can't be possible Sue. You're lying. Sam would never go hunting without me. Now spit it out! I should have known something was wrong when you started interfering Seth." I shouted at her with full fury.

Seth looked away being careful not to catch my glare.

"Let me remind you that I won't be leaving her! No matter what." I told them.

"Mom...lets just tell him" Seth insisted

"Tell me what?" Now that's what i want to hear this.

"I wasn't planning on telling you this way but you made me." She looked back at her son before looking back at me.

"What is it?" I stressed every word.

"The cold one got to Billy before Sam even realized and..." that was the last thing I heard Sue before I sprinted out the door.

My heart was racing as fast as my legs were running. As soon as I got in the woods and phased, I continued to run back to home. The place where I haven't been in an awfully long time...not that I wanted to but it was easier for me to handle myself when I'm away from my dad. I didn't want him to be worried about me. He was already in bad shape way back when Bella and I were still together.

Bella! An alarm set off in my head the moment Bella cam through my mind  
"Bella! Oh god I left her. Why now! Of all the times why now? I can't be able to protect both them at the same time."

It was a battle between my mind and my heart. My feelings and my consciences. My Bella and my dad.I can't choose between them right now. Not now! "Arghh! " I howled in my shape-shifter form. I kept thinking of going back to Bella.

"I'm sorry Bella. I promise you i'll be back as soon as i'm sure that my dad is safe." I whispered to wind in hopes that it would give her my message.

I slowed down and shifted back when the image of my house came into view. There was someone here just now. I was starting to pick Charlie's scent. I was very strong, and then there was ... **HER! **I can smell her scent too. "filthy leaches." I hissed under my breath as I ran into my house before shouting my dad's name. I was beginning to get scared when I didn't here him reply, but then after calling him for the fifth time, he answered back.

I ran towards him when I saw him making his way towards me, " Dad.. are you ok? Did she hurt you?" I asked very quickly.

He didn't say anything. He just kept staring at me.

"Dad?" It came out as a whisper.

"Dad? All of sudden now I seem like your Dad?" he said in a low but stern voice. I knew exactly where this was going.

"Dad...I don't have time for this—"

"DON'T YOU CALL ME THAT!" he yelled. I heard him yell at me for the first time in my life. Even when I was a just kid messing around he wouldn't do that. Him saying that made me speechless.

"You lost your right to call me that the second you chose her me. What were you thinking?" He asked me.

The ties are broken, no more father son talk. I'm not sure if this could be fixed.

"Choose her? That wasn't even an option. She's my imprint. She's my life." I told him.

"Imprinting works both ways, not one. You all know that..but.." he paused and took a deep breathe "Why do you choose to ignore it Jake?"

He caught me. It was like he hit the bull's eye, right where it shouldn't have gone.

"Look dad, I came here to make sure you were alright, not to come and get lectured. But since you're fine, i'll be leaving." I tried to sound as calm as possible, but my nerves got in the way and it ended up sounding like I purposely meant to shout at him. I was already on my way out of the door with my hand on the door knob when spoke up.

"So you're leaving? Is that it? After all these years of raising you on my own without your mother..-God rest her soul-...it ends like this? Coming to check to see whether i'm still alive? Well you know what Jake, the minute you close that door, don't worry about seeing me alive ever again."

"Oh so you're threatening me now?" I asked him.

"No Jake, it's not a threat, its a promise." He said it as if he was putting his fate in my hands.

Finally, I loosed my grip on the door. "Fine. What do you want from me?"

The next thing he said, it almost hurt as bad as it did when Bella left. "I want my son my back." He was on the verge of tears now.

I was speechless yet again, so I just stood there staring down at the floor and for some reason my mind went blank. I felt numb. It was as if I was just a walking and talking figure...no emotion or soul._**Isn't that what the cold ones are.**_

"Where's my son? I'm not asking about the one who left his family for some girl who doesn't even appreciate him. Or the one that acts and looks like he forgot the meaning of life. No! Not him, I want the son who was there for his taught us that the world revolves around the people you love and not yourself and the one who was there when I needed him the most."

I stood there a while... just replaying what he had just told me in my head—almost like a broken 's when I realized I really have changed. All of this yelling and fighting. How did it all come to this?

I began to question my own identity. Who am I now?

One of the pack members?

"_**Dude we were just trying to help" Quil said calmly.**_

_**"I don't need help." I said sharply.**_

A son?

"L_**ook dad, I came here to make sure you're alright, not to get lectured. But since you are fine, I'll be leaving"**_

An imprint?

_**"Yeah? Then what is he to you?" Leah asked intently.**_

_**"He's...he...well he's my best friend." Bella stuttered out**_

A father?

_**"I'm sorry Jake. We did our best. I'm so sorry!"**_

_**I was speechless and my mind was filled with mind numbing pain.**_

_**"Sue what is it? Spit it OUT!" Sam growled.**_

_**"The baby well I'm afraid it's paralyzed permanently." Sue whispered out.**_

Nothing. Just completely nothing. I'm just Jake. No longer one of the pack members after what I did that day. I don't think Sam's going to let me come back into the pack. My dad stated it clearly just now that he doesn't have a son anymore. Bella also made her point very clear about where I stand in the relationship.

Nothing more than a best friend.

Then there's my unborn child...I've already let it down even before it came into the world.

The second I thought about our unborn child's condition I broke down. I was on my knees, crying my heart out over my mistakes. I wish I could take it all back.

Just then I felt my shoulder being rubbed soothingly. I looked up to see his face. Grey hairs were started to grow even more here and there...a few more wrinkles had formed around the eyes that I always saw—first thing every morning when I got out of my bed. The more I stare at him, I realized he has changed a lot physically. I also noticed some sagging in his cheek-bones along with his red puffy eyes...he looks like he's been crying all day.

The man once never shed a tear even when his wife passed away and now is crying all because of his son. His useless and ungrateful son.

"I'm sorry Dad" I trembled

"It's alright Jake. You can fix it like you always do." He assured me.

" I can?" i asked hopingly.

"Yeah, you always get the cars fixed right?" he asked with a smile.

"Dad" I chuckled with him.

We both went into the kitchen and sat down, each of us with a cup of coffee in our hands. At first the only thing that broke the silence was the sound of putting the cups back down on the table after taking a sip.

"So it' true then...the baby is yours?" He asked me.

Way to go Dad, nice ice breaker. "Yes, and **we're **planning on keeping the baby." I told him.

"Is that why you keep going back to her?"

"No Dad, it's because I love her." I corrected him.

He let out a deep sigh and started talking again "Jake—"

"Dad stop it—okay? Just stop right there...now i'll admit I have changed a lot since then, made a few mistakes here and there and ignored all of you. But, nothing is going change my mind over Bella—who is the mother of my unborn child and after having said that, could you please stop bringing her up."

"I can't Jacob. She's the reason for this whole mess...and there's you..."

"Dad! " I yelled as my fist hit the dinning table.

" DON'T BLAME HER FOR THIS." It came out like an order.

He stayed silent for a long time and we were just stared at each other for the whole time until he spoke up.

"Fine, I won't talk about your _**imprint**_. Happy?" he wasn't happy about this though.

"Thank you." I replied him.

"Jake, can I ask you something?" he asked me, after taking a moment.

"Go ahead." I nodded.

"Let's say, if I died—" the question hang right there.

"Dad! Don't say that." I cut him off.

" Just listen son, let's say if I died and if sooner or later you get to know the person who caused my death...would you avenge me?"

"Of course I would! I love you just as much as I love her." I said.

"You would do that in honor of your old man?" he asked as if he wasn't expecting that answer

"Of course dad, why doubt it?" i asked as it was the most obvious thing.

"Because you let the person who caused Harry's death go. I thought he was a father figure to you. Have you forgot about your heritage?" He assumed.

"No I haven't! I'm still hunting for that leech!" i raised my voice a little.

"That's good to hear, Jacob. Harry will surely rest in peace once that is accomplished." He said that while staring at the floor.

"Don't worry Dad. I promise I will." I assured him.

"Don't make promise you can't keep." He said it under his breathe.

"What do you mean? You don't have faith in your own son?" my voice got serious at that very moment.

"No it's not that. I think you can take the leech down in no time, but the thing is, will it solve anything?" he asked.

He lost me there. What is he trying to say? I just stared at him waiting for him to continue.

"The cold one wouldn't be here if it wasn't for **her.**" He raised his voice towards the end of the sentence.

I should have known, he just wants to blame Bella.

"Dad, it's not her fault"

"Damn right it is! If she would have taken my advice in the first place, none of this would have happened!"

"Why do you keep talking as if Bella's actions have affected everyone? The ones involved are me, her and **them**"

"You don't get it. " he shouted in frustration.

"What don't I get—" he cut me to it.

"How could you be so blind! Can't you see all these problems she's had caused?"

"If it wasn't for her, Harry would still be alive. Seth and Leah would still have a father. Things wouldn't have to be this way of she never even messed with the cold ones in the first place!"

"Emily wouldn't have to go on living her whole life with a severely scarred face!"

"That was all Sam's fault." I replied back in fury.

"No, the cold ones came to get Bella because she got the red head's mate killed. If not because of that, Sam wouldn't have phased. You and your brothers would be living normal lives! She took that from all of you! It wasn't her right to do so."

Not now dad.. please not now.

"And Leah wouldn't be the girl she is now, if not because of Bella. Tell me it's not true if I accused her for being the cause for all of these problems. After all that's happened, we still accepted her into our lives and try to protect her but what she does she do? Run off with the leech, even after carrying your child she still chooses him over **you! **Do you need a woman like that in your life?" he had his dead-serious tone on.

"I can't dad, i'm sorry. I can't do anything about that. Sorry to disappoint you." I told him.

"You have the chance to undo your mistakes." He whispered to me.

"Dad, this is the last time I am going to say this... I am not leaving her." My voice showed how annoyed i was .

"Then don't." He stated.

"What do you mean?" i asked.

"Don't leave, just let her go and see what happens then. If she comes back then keep her. Fight for her till death if she doesn't then just accept the fact that she never was yours in the first place."

Did I really just hear him say that? "Dad, how could you say that? Let me remind you that she's my imprint."

"But she doesn't think of you that way does she?" he asked again.

"I can't—" was all that i could say.

"Believe in yourself. Your brother, sisters, mine and everyone else's life are in your hands. You could choose to ignore us and be happy or you can take your old man's advice and save the ones you love from getting hurt. Choose wisely, I have faith in you. "

Why does he always give me an ultimatum?

What he said hit me like a ton of bricks. I have been selfish, but why not? All my life I have lived for my dad, then the pack and now for my future family.

So just this once, why I can't I be selfish.

"jake.. you are my son and it hurts me to see you this way. I want you to be happy jake." He said softly.

"then leave me alone, don't blame her" i spatted at him.

"jake..how do i... ok fine. Lets make a deal"

"dad, not now please."

"just hear me out ok?"

I nodded to his will.

"In a week's time after bella conscious again, we'll see.."

I waited for him to continue and he did. "We'll see,** if** she is truly your imprint,** if** she feels the same way towards you , **if **she does care for you and **if **she does comeback to you then my son you have my blessing and i promise to not interfere in any of your issues unless you allow me to help you." He said but it didn't end there.

" but if she doesn't, i want you to stop everything. I don't want her in your life. Do we have a deal?"he continued.

" that's just too.." i was about to tell him, how stupid this thing sounded but he ...

" you don't have faith in your imprint? Is that what you are trying to say ?"those words he said. It was as if he was testing me. oh god. I beg of you oh lord, why test me so much? Haven't i prove to you, my love towards her?

"i do have faith in her. She will. Come. I know she will." I said in full confidence and faith.

"it's a deal?" he asked with a smirk.

" yup." I said sealing the deal.

R


	32. Chapter31A beautiful lie,A painful truth

**Disclaimer: I do not own twilight **

**All hail Jacob! Team Jacob all the way...**

**This chapter is dedicated to connect2tjb, zdra8351, jul5857, ****KiraSen89, bmthespian, j.d.y, neonchick08, Ctulee06, MzHelloKitty and 4 anon reviews from BellaBlack,No name,Kay and prettypink **

**First of all i can't tell you how sorry i am that i'm updating this story extremely late. I had difficulties like major difficulties. Like i mean i dont even know why all these things happen to me. i had a very bad case of manic depression attack a few times, i mean like come on how many times do i have to say english isn't my first language. i'm trying my best here. You don't need to pm with those hurtfull words, you could have helped me. i would love to have you as my beta. I need help to improve and please help me to do so. Oh yeah THE BABY IS BOY! Remember that despite what i had written in this chappie.**

**Bolded sentence below is from chapter 30: please comeback**

_**Bella's Pov**_

It was quiet. Even though i can't recognize the place where I am but the feeling that I was getting is just soothing in a way. I can't describe it in words cause the place I am is not even a room, it's like I'm in a another state. It was like someone's embrace, even the tingly feeling in my stomach. It felt familiar but I couldn't figure out who or what though. The feeling didn't stay as long as i would have liked. It just went away as fast as it came but it left me questioning.

_**"I want you to know that I promised myself that I won't, even for a second cause you any pain but what I have done was only to protect you, it wasn't a choice. I really hope you can understand that." **_

What was that about? The harder I try to force myself to recognize the voice, the dizzier I felt. I started craving for the warm feeling again. I needed it. I felt like I was suffocating. I needed it like I needed air to breathe.I tried to grab it even though I know I can't and that's when I fell into the black hole. Maybe that's how Alice fell into the rabbit hole in the first place? The new place was still quiet but it's wasn't peaceful anymore in fact it was scary. I tried to wake up but then .. How I am suppose to wake up when I never fell asleep? It was getting harder for me to breathe and my stomach was burning hot as if it was on fire. At first I wondering why was it only my stomach when the rest of my body is cold?

It remained that way for awhile until I felt a sudden warm feeling, it was nice. In a way it was comforting and i realized that something was moving in my womb. moving ? Moving? My Baby! How can I forget my baby? the thought striked my mind, this must be nightmare, I have got to wake up. I have to save my baby, that's all I thought, i didn't reliaze that maybe that warm feeling would have been something good. I started running towards the light, I didn't care where it's going to bring me, all I want is to save my baby and that's all.

The light was getting brighter by the moment which forced me to close my eyes but not stopping me from running. Suddenly I felt as if I fell down from cliff but then the sea didn't swallow me this time because something soft caught me and I landed safely. My eyes were in pain when I tried to open them to take in the surrounding, it was a very bright light shining upon me but from where I am a I can only see a white wall facing me. I could hear a beep sound and when I tried to move my hand I heard someone calling me "Bella?" shockingly that wasn't the voice in my head.

I couldn't recognize who it was at first, tall, black hair and tan skin. "Bella? Are you OK?" the soft voice sounded concern. "hmm yeah I guess so."i replied while trying to get up from my lying position. It was so that i could get a better view of the person talking to me. "oh thank god, you got us all worried." "ermm... Yeah. Sorry." I gave him short replies well more like sputtering like a figgin tea pot. All because I was still trying to figuring out who he was. "Bella. Is something wrong?" he asked while taking short steps towards me.

"errm.. Seth. I'm good, just a bit blur and dizzy." I was talking faster when i realized who he was. It's not that I don't like having Seth around, it's just, my heart kind of felt disappointed. Although I'm not quite sure myself who i was expecting. " ooh.." he stopped and then rushed out the room. Was I confused? YES. Was it weird for not recognizing Seth just now? YES. Was it necessary to be disappointed that the man or boy turned out to be Seth? I DON'T KNOW. Am I suppose to be expecting someone else? WHO KNOWS.

As if on cue, the moment I tried to get out of the bed (BAMM!) Sue comes in following Seth right on his track " oh . Bella, you shouldn't be getting out of bed so soon"Sue said, she was in her doctor-mode. You know the ones that kinda remind you of your mom. " why not?" I asked dumbfound making it sound as if she is taking the situation to a whole new level. " Bella. You passed out for a long time"she said slowly and loud like I'm foreign. It took a few minutes for me to realize what she said. "what? What do you mean ? Is something wrong?" I asked all too fast. " you forgot? Ooh well, you were in the grocery shop when you fainted and you were brought here last Saturday."Sue continued and ended the last part almost in a whisper.

"whoa hold up. Last Saturday? What day is it today?"i asked Sue almost immediately. "Thursday, dear." She said slowly while rubbing my back. "5 days?" I shouted, I just couldn't content my shock but then " is something wrong with the baby?" all those shock was washed away by the down pour of my worries. "well, the baby is fine" she said it but the way she said it somehow sounded as if there is more to it. " Sue. How is my baby?"i asked her again, but stressed the matter more. "the baby is fine, Bella and right now you really need to rest. l'll have Seth call Emily ?" she was about to leave the room but i stopped her.

"Emily, Why her?" I asked not that i mind seeing Emily again, it's just after all that had happened i wanted to avoid her for now. "well, to bring you back home with her." She said as if it was the most logical thing. As if i should have known. Heck, she could have even put "duh" in front of the sentence. Obviously, Seth hasn't told her yet about the current situation between the pack and me . "no. Sue just call Charlie." I said while trying to make eye contact to Seth but.. "Bella.. Charlie. Well he's actually.." sue started but Seth interrupted her. "He's busy. I just got off the call with him. I'll bring him to see you later. Promise?" he said as if he's trying to convince me or was he trying to get rid off Sue?I played along with him and soon Sue left the room .

i was expecting Seth to stay but he was following sue out of the room, so much for the telephatic message. "Seth. Could I have a moment with you."i said just right before he was about to walk out of the room. "sure Bella, is there anything you want me to tell Charlie?"he asked me with his back facing me and his hands on the door knob. "no.. Actually I wanted to ask you about what your mom said." He remained silent. Which made me even more nervous.

" Is she hiding something from me?" i asked him hoping he would say _"nothing. everything's fine"_

"well Bella.."_.no._

"Seth please . Don't lie. I need to know if it concerns my baby."i was begging him. He sighed, for a moment i almost believed it was a sigh of relief.

"well actually Bella, do you remember when you first found out you were pregnant?"he said in a calming voice which makes me realise how much he has grown. He reminds me of Charlie a little "yes. Why?"i asked him, shifting my concertration into the conversation. "Well incase you forgot Sam must have mentioned that since you are not of quillete blood, the baby would be having trouble adjusting to your body temperature." I took in all he said . He continued when he noticed that I still couldn't figure it out "well the baby was fine until you left these while you were surrounded by us and Jake.." the moment he said his name. I started seeing red. " well ,what does that have to do with me fainting?"

" calm down Bella, I think you don't realize it but you left us for about a it was actually a surprise to everyone that you managed to survived that long without having us around you. That amount of time could have affected the baby and might the reason why you fainted." I was speechless for a second there.I realized then, all those headache and my belly being suddenly warm ." I'm a bad mother aren't I, Seth ? I said after a very long moment , realizing how much of a fool I had been. " It was just a small mistake, Bella. People make mistakes all the time." He said trying to comfort me, I felt his honesty."thanks Seth. You have been...kind to me" I said while trying to lie down on the bed. " You are welcome Bella, it's the least I could do for you and the baby" he said while showing off his smile by now he was seated back into the chair beside my bed.

The smile, It reminds me of J... Ooh no Bella. Not again. "Bella?" he called me as I got drifted away with my thoughts. " Sorry. I just have a lot in my mind right now. Oh yeah Seth how come I'm fine right now? Since I'm not with..." he cut me off short. " Well Bella because Ja...well I have been visiting you since you have been admitted here. Well more like staying here" he chuckled "You mean you have been here for .."I was shocked to say the least "Yes. from morning until 8 pm. I could have just stayed the whole night away but my mom doesn't want me to skip school. But then you don't have to be worried cause the pack took turns staying with you all night"he reassured me.

"Oh, no no Seth. I am actually glad that I wasn't the reason that you might have skipped school. All of them?" "come again Bella?" "I mean, all of them, the whole pack took turns?" i was slighty embrassed. "Well.."he stretched. "ermm.. It was just me and Sam actually"he gave me the guilty-smile. " Sam?" I blurted out in surprise "Yeah, well Emily forced him to" he said slowly "Ooh that explains alot,I mean the fact that they actualy came even after I have made it clear how much I hated them for ruining my life with the whole stupid treaty" I didn't realize I said it out loud. I noticed Seth staring at me, I could see his facial expression changed in an instant. I kind of feel bad for him.

"Sorry Seth." I apologized to him, and i just waited. I was waiting for him to just walk away or burst in anger just like his brothers but he acted otherwise. "No it's Ok Bella. I think you don't get it. Sam made the treaty with them for a reason and I know that you are sad because of the treaty they didn't get to say goodbye to you. I feel bad for you, I understand your anger completely." He said looking at me. I was shocked and speechless to realize that this is coming from his point of view eventhough he is their enemy, he didn't hate them nor me. "But Bella, you must try to understand our concerns too. We love you and the baby. We only did that to protect you and the baby. Think about it Bella, what if none of us stayed with you all these while. What would have happen to the baby? It would break us as much as it would for you if anything were to happen to the baby. Maybe the problem is that you see this situation as we are interfering your life, your relationship and your baby but Bella.. Since the moment we knew you were having Jake's child you were already one of us. That's why Sam and the rest tried to protect you and shelter you from the cold ones. But neither of us expect you to react this way."

" but Seth, I don't need protection from them. They are family and I love them,I love Edward. They won't harm me in fact Edward protected me from the Volturi and they did save me from James. If not because of them I would have become a vampire" I said showing him the scar. He was shocked at first but then started smiling. " Well Bella, that's a good a news. Well actually a great news" he said in a bubbly tone. " I don't get it Seth?" seriously like where did this suddenly crazy-exicted teenage boy come from? " Bella, you just told me the reasons why you find them good and a reason for you to trust them. Why don't you try explaining that to the pack? I understand now and I like them more now."he said grinning. "But Seth, you are different than the rest and plus I don't want to see them and neither do they." I said in a soft tone trying not hurt his feelings. "Aww..Come on Bella. Try to be optimistic . If you can't give them a chance to get to know more about the cold ones. Then how do you expect them to realize that maybe they are seeing it in a wrong perspective?" he said tilting his head to the side.

"But Seth.." I started but he cut me through yet again. "No more buts Bella. You wont be alone. I'll always be on your side and my mom will too. My mom is a close friend of Dr Carlisle, she knows him well. So you don't have to worry about will just be glad for you to comeback safely, especially Emily ofcourse. All these things will be just a like nightmare, and before you know it everyone would forget about this and we could happily wait for JJ's arrival. What do you say?" He said while making his way towards the door but didn't give me enough time to reply him. " I'll get going first Bella, I'm going to inform Ch.. " he paused and then continued "I'll be back soon and when I get back I expect a good answer from you" he said smiling away as he heads out the room door.

Should I? Should I not ? I began feel Goose bumps .The strange Deja-vu feeling, the familiarity but I couldn't figure out when or what was it about.I ran through quickly all the possible outcomes that I may have to face if :

**Outcomes** **A **(if I did go back them)  
I would have to:  
- Face Leah again and only god knows how much patience I still have left to face her before I land punch on her face.  
- Listen to Paul and his friends back talk about me and pretend as if it's nothing but clearly its not.  
- Seeing his face again. How am I suppose to do that? Even the sound of his name makes angry.  
- Endure all these for the next couple of months

But I would :  
- Have Emily and Seth to give me company  
- Save my baby

**Or **

**Outcomes b** (if I did not go back to them)  
I would have:  
-risk my baby's life  
- endure all the pain  
- hurt Seth and while i'm at it might as add Emily on the list.

But I would :  
- Have a peaceful and comfortable environment for the rest of my pregnancy  
- Get to do whatever I want and when I want  
- Have a chance to finally tell Charlie about my situation  
- Maybe able to get a visit from the Cullens. Since Alice did came back for me the last time. Which would be impossible if I stayed with the pack.

"The last time they left me, was when you arrived didn't you?"I smiled as i started to reminisce my life while rubbing my tummy. Was I this heartbroken the last time? I don't actually remember it in detail but Charlie never fails to remind me that Ja.._**he**_..was the reason I came back to life when the Cullens left the last time. At least the last time he left me, he got the opportunity to say goodbye but then why do I have the feeling that he didn't completely leave me. I started forcing myself to remember back all those memories but then every one of them contains ...Jacob. From the time, I brought back bikes for him to fix, the moment we almost kissed once in my car,the time when he told me he was a shape shifter, the first time I realized his wasn't the same Jake anymore when I fell off the bike and hurt my head and the time when we made lo... WAIT... I fell off the bike. That's it!.I fell off the bike. I fell off the bike because I wasn't concentrating on the road. I wasn't concentrating because i saw Edward. I heard Edward. Not literally but he was there when I ... When I was in danger! When I did something reckless. That's it !

_Something reckless_. That is all that I kept on chanting in my mind as I started searching for something. Basically anything that i could use to be dangerous or reckless. That's when I laid my eyes upon a beer bottle, it must belong Sam because i realise the bottle is empty and i don't think Sue allows Seth to drink yet. Without a second to waste I hit the bottle against the side of the bed . A loud glass shattering noise was heard and without any hesitation I grab a hold of the remaining glass shard and aimed the sharp end of the shard to cut my wrist. At first i was a bit hesitant, but i knew that if doubted myself i could never get them back. I can't lose them and so i...

"Bella, stop it right now!" the same beautiful voice- velvet like shouted at me. "Edward." I breathed out softly, hoping that the voice wasn't just in my mind "Bella don't do it, please think about us. Think about our future together. You don't need to do this ."his voice was calm but then i could still sense abit of urgentness. "Edward, comeback." I shouted helplessly while raking the glass shard on the bed sheet as the tears began pour down. "Bella,calm down! Calm down" he said softly near the end. My breathing came back normal and my tears stopped. "Edward, comeback.i need you. I can't go back to the days I was broken, not in this time Edward, please"I begged him.

"..shh..stop crying. I'll comeback love. Don't worry I will, just not right now." "when?" I asked. "soon love, soon when the time is right.I'll be back for the both of you. Till then promise me that you won't do anything reckless again. Bella, please wait for me ." he voice started disappearing as i got up from the bed as if I could catch him "Edward..Edward!" I screamed as loud as possible and fell on on the floor sobbing when I realised I lost him, Once again.

"Bella! Bella what happ.. oh god! Bella why is your palm bleeding?" Seth came in rushing into the room. I hadn't realised that i grab a hold of the shard too tightly "Nurse! Help" he shouted while removing the shard from my other hand. A few moments later the nurse came and after identifying my injury called for the doctor for an emergency. After almost 1 and a half hour, I was brought back to my original room after it was cleaned and the sheets were changed and my hand was treated. I was surprised to see Emily and Seth was there waiting for me. "Bella, what had gotten into you? You could have killed the baby?" Emily started shouting at me. Emily? She came to see me? "Emily how did you..?" "trust me that is a very long story. why didn't you want me here ?"

"Emily. I'm sorry, i just thought.." i stopped there when Emily all of a sudden crushed me with hug. "Don't you dare do that again! You hear me vampire girl?" she said trying lighten up the mood but i could hear her sobbing. "I would like to promise but you know since i am Bella swan that is quite impossible." I said chuckling and she too joined me soon. Seth left the room soon saying he needed to run an errand. " How are you, Bella?" Emily finally asked me after i got back into the bed and she took a seat right beside me. "Oh you know, the usual. " i said smiling while raising up my bandaged hand to complete the joke.

I was half expecting her to at least smile at my effort to make a joke but she was serious . For a second there i was almost going to apologize for ruining the atmosphere but then she said "No Bella, i meant. Your life. How are you coping with the pregnancy?" she almost made me miss my mom for a second there. " Other than whole temperature rising , headaches and all. She's a good girl. Aren't you sweetheart?" i said rubbing my tummy. " it's good to hear that you love her." Emily said while smiling but i was taken back.

"Of course i love my baby, Emily. What makes you say otherwise? Wait.. it's Leah right? Come on Emily, don't tell me that you actually believe a word she says? "i said raising my voice a little. "God no Bella. I know she could be mean and harsh "she was going on but i cut through and said "and pain the butt" with earned a short laugh from Emily. "yeah and that too but deep down she just said all that cause she cared about you and the baby."Emily said trying to make me understand Leah more as if that's going to work after all that had happened. " Yeah well i would have respected her more if she wouldn't have butt into my relationship." i snapped at her."Bella.. listen. I'm not trying pick sides or anything because i seriously am not. But Leah.. she.. isn't the girl she use to be. This harsh and sarcastic girl she is now isn't the real Leah. And i want you to know that, i made her into the girl she is now. If only i hadn't met Sam, she would have her happiness back. " she paused and continued " you see Bella, Leah doesn't hate she wants to protect you and Jake from getting hurt." I was about speak up but got shut down by Emily " Bella... Bella. Please just hear me out. This one time. please Bella" i complied to her wishes.

" Bella, when i said that Leah wants to protect both of you. She really wants to protect both of you from all the heartache she has been through. Because Bella when you see things from Leah's point of view that's when you'll realized that she isn't actually mean. This relationship you have between you,Edward and Jake. It might have reminded her of the relationship Sam ,her and i use to have. There is the individual who loves so much that in the end gets their heart broken, then there is the one who comes in unexpectedly and steals the first individuals love away and finally there is the one that gets torn in between. The one that doesn't want to hurt neither party but can't ignore the pull, the attraction."

As i listen to her, the pieces felt into place and made . but in my case it'. she continued " well you could say she wants to protect Jacob from heartache because deep down i think all of us know that he can't live without you and Bella i think..no.. i know you know that too. I just can't understand why you would want to push the bond ..Bella." "but Emily.. she should respect my decision just as she should with Sam's decision as ! Emily! you out of all the people should know that " I said completely dodging her question. I remained silent as i looked straight into Emily's eye, reflecting back my relationship with was like my sister,like how Alice was... She was speechless for a moment , and then continued "i know. She should. but Bella i kept quiet this long because she was once in your shoe or the other way around. I'm not sure" "what?"

"Leah. She tries very hard to keep everyone together even though you don't really see her effort much. She does and Bella she keeps on trying to help you because when Sam left her. She wasn't herself anymore. She was lost, because all those while Sam was her Sun and when he left. she was lost in the was her life,her life revolved around Sam and when Sam left her. She lost a big part of herself. She needed help but none of us was able to help her. That's why she gets in your relationship, her intentions are not to make it complicated but to help you from making mistakes. The same mistakes she did. She doesn't want you to be hurt or lost just like she was." she said it staring at me while i remained silent not wanting to believe any of her words. "she believes that it's her responsibility to guide you from making the same mistakes that she wants to help you Bella. She really cares for you, she just has a different approach on helping others. " There was a long silence after she finished talking. "Bella" she called me after a very long pause. "Could we talk about something else?"i asked well actually i would have begged her. I can't believe that i am actually feeling guilty towards Leah. " sure." She replied me with a smile. "ermm.. when are you coming back ?" yep. Straight to point just like Alice.

"wow...erm.. I'm not sure. I don't think I'm going to comeback. I mean, what am i going to tell Charlie? I can't just tell him that i need to go back because of my baby. god! he doesn't even know I'm pregnant Emily?" i was shrieking by the end. "Oh Bella don't worry about that. when he wakes up, we'll tell him together. Ok? " Emily said while hugging me . "did he send you here?to check on me? how is he? Wait more importantly where the hell is he?" i asked her as was getting frustrated by the minute, i mean i know charlie can be late at times but seriously come on don't you think when your daughter is in the hospital you need to be there for her? "i beg your pardon?" she choked " Charlie? He send you here? Right?" i asked again, getting even more frustrated. Urghh stupid hormones.

" Bella. Did Seth happen to mention anything about Charlie?" the look on her face was definitely not good. " No.. is something wrong? Is he ok?" i started to panic when i heard her reply. "Calm down Bella, he is fine." She said but i could read her facial expression clearly that there was much more than that. "Emily.. i need to know. What happen?"i stressed every syllable. She took my hand in her and started slowly. " Bella you see, the day you got admitted here. Charlie came to visit you and i think he decided to visit Billy after that." "Jake ! Jake did something right? I knew it!" i was screaming with anger. He just had to ruin everything i have. Just like he told when he told Charlie that i own a bike. Can't he just grow up? "No no .. honey. It's on the way back from the black's. He.." she hesitated. " Emily.. tell . i need to know." " he.. he.. Victoria got to him." (please refer to chapter 29:black swan) " what ? what do you mean ? she got to him? Is he ok? Where is he?" the moment i heard her name i was up on my feet and grabbing a hold of Emily while shaking her. " Bella. You need to rest. Please lie back down. he's fine." She tries to reassure me but i " Where is he?" "He's in this hospital too.. Bella!" all i heard was her screaming after me as i dashed out of the room .


	33. Chapter 32 Daddy dearest

**Disclaimer : I don't own twilight  
this chapter is dedicated to Mzhellokitty,prettypink,anny,bmthespian,jul5857 and also to crazeebeautiful who pm-ed me. I promise I will finish this story, but I can't promise how soon though. ;( sorry**

**Btw I have edited all the chapters, if you re-read the chapters now, you will notice some big changes that I have added, for example chapter 7. But there are more chapters that I have edited. Do read them .**

**After Charlie was discharged from the hospital.(Bella 10 months )**

**Charlie's POV (btw check out profile for this story's banner)**

"Yes. Yes.. aha.. yes. ehem. Yup. Absolutely. Aha. Yes. Oh,God,Renee! I'm fine. No, no need for you to come here right away. Bella and I got it all I could manage myself, I mean it's not that bad. Everything is back to normal except for my left arm. The doctor said it's going take longer time to recover." I told Renee the same thing that I have been repeating to almost everyone who has called me in the past week.

If I had known that I would have to be constantly on the phone or entertaining guests who came to visit, I would have liked to stay at the hospital much longer. I mean, I am happy that there are people who care about me and the fruit baskets are wonderful.

Everything was great at first, but now it's almost the end of the week and it feels more of a routine than comfort. But hey, who am I kidding? No matter what,I wouldn't have stayed at the hospital more than I needed anyway.

I couldn't just set aside Sue's betrayal.I can't believe that Renee thinks I'm exaggerating the situation. How would you feel if someone you dearly trusted kept a secret that concerns you from you for months? Months? But then she feels that way because she doesn't know the whole story.

Well you know, I might have forgotten to mention Bella's pregnancy to her. But hey, I'm an old man. I tend to forget stuff or… I don't want to handle Renee's reaction just yet.

For months, have I been blinded by everything. For months, haveI been not aware of my friendship with Billy crumbling to pieces. For months, have I been eating lies my ...friend fed. For months have I lost my daughter... Bella. She's different. And I realized that just last week.

Like the time when I tried to bring up Jake. She totally shut me down. And by chance I managed to bring up that topic today.

" Thank god! You didn't tell Renee, right away in the hospital" I said to Bella who was busy peeling oranges by the side of my bed. "I should have just told her. " she chuckled but still managed to tease me .

"God, no. you know your mom, she tends to exaggerate the situation more than it already is." Charlie said

"Yeah. Remember the time, I fell down the stairs ?" she asked me about the time when she first moved with me.

" Oh who could forget that. She had me sit down and listen to her talk for more than an hour" I complained.

**Lesson** learned from that 1 hour and 45 minutes talk : **Never** tell Renee that you are in the hospital. You may tell her after you got discharged from the hospital but **never** when you are still in the hospital unless you plan on listening to her safety precaution talk. Where by the end of the talk, she will proof to you the need to wear a helmet at all times, and yes, even when you in the car .

She chuckled and then continued on " Yeah I remember that but still I think we should've told her sooner. You know Renee doesn't like people keeping secrets from her"

"Ah ha.. Speaking of secrets. When are you planning on telling her?" I asked her, catching her off-guard.

I saw her realizeit, because she took a moment longer to peel the orange. " I already told her that **they** left"

" Well that's one, what about the other one?" nah, she's not getting away that easy.

"What do you mean?" I could sense the nervousness in her tone.

" Bella enough. Just stop with the whole act. When were you planning on telling me?. No wait, let me rephrase that. Did you even have an idea on telling me? Or did you think you are an adult now since you got yourself pregnant and could get away with it?" I didn't realize I was yelling until I stopped.

She was quiet and she looked scared. Just like how, she was when she was 10. The time when, I caught her red-handed trying to peek at her Christmas present before Renee was up .

"How.. did. you? " she stuttered. " I have my source but I didn't expect to hear this that way though. Seriously Bella, what were you thinking ? I'm sorry." I paused. " were you even thinking?"

"Dad, let me explain." She started but I didn't give in. Not this time. Not for me or her but for Jacob's sakeat least.

"no! enough is enough Bella. I'm sick and tired of hearing excuses after excuses. I want answers. Honest answers. Could you do me that?" it came out way harsher than I meant it to be. Maybe, just maybe because I let out my anger and frustration that I've been through on this matter with other people as well on her. Jacob, Billy ,Sue and Bella...

She flinched , indeed she is shocked. A father's heart could only take that much, I tried reach her but I realized it was a misfire when she took a step back.

"Bella.." I called her, I felt bad. "Bella. I'm so.."

"No. You're right, Dad. I haven't been honest with you before. And you are right ! I'm stupid. Like who the hell on earth gets into these much problems! "

"Bella.. bells.." I started again but she didn't even give the chance to finish .

"I don't even know where to start, dad!" she was on top of her lungs by now. As much I as I would like compete with her in this so called who-has-a higher-voice contest even though it's childish, I can't. And she can't as well.

"Bella, calm down. You are pregnant. You should be thi..." again I was cut.

"Exactly, I am pregnant dad. I slept with someone who I thought was my best friend for the past 18 years but he turned out to be one who that destroyed my life . And boyfriend.. oh wait should I say my ex-boyfriend and his family left for only god knows when they'll be back. Finally here I am with my dad lecturing me about my all my life mistakes. Go ahead dad, just continue on whatever you were going lecture me cause it's not like I could do anything else or go somewhere without being judge as long I have this " she said pointing at her growing stomach, I can see anger in her eyes but at the same time I know that if I push her any further she would be crying. And so I did what any father would do.

"aw..Bells, I'm sorry. I'm sorry couldn't be there to protect you." I whispered to her as I enveloped her into a hug.

I was half expecting her to push me away, like she always does. Bella is a girl that doesn't like showing people that she is weak, that's why she get's into most of the trouble. But this time, she didn't even budge, in fact she buried face into the front my jacket. And then, it started. The salt water dam was broken, I could hear her cry.

I don't know how we are in this position. Was it her fault for being careless and reckless or was it mine for not being there when she needed me?

Oh Renee, I let our daughter down. I should've been there but I wasn't. It's all my fault. How am I going to tell you that our daughter is pregnant? how am I going to face Billy after all that had happened? How am I going to forgive Sue? How am suppose to comfort Bella?

It's my fault. I'll take the blame." Shh.. Bella. It's ok. Everything is going to alright. We are going to go through this... together." I said rubbing her back soothingly.

"No, it's not alright. It's never going to be. I'm scared it won't"I heard her voice, it was almost a whisper but I heard it. She needed reassurance. I know she needed it.

" It will Bells. It always will. Now stop with the whole crying, have mercy on me bells. An old man could only handle much for a time. Besides this is supposed to be Renee's job." I said referring to the whole stuffed nose and swollen eyes.

She chuckled. Finally a change of mood, "yeah, you were never the one who handles me when I cried."

"I have a valid reason for that."

"you sure do, dad" she chuckling again.

"But still I'm sacred." She said, wiping her nose.

"why?"I asked her.

" because of Mom. I'm scared that she will be.." she said in her scared-little girl voice

"hmm.. don't worry. I'll cover up that part for you. Wait..wait.. I haven't finished yet." I said before she gets all excited and all.

"okay.." she said in a way asking me to proceed, "Only if you, make up with Jacob."

I know I was pushing my luck but I had to. For my unborn grandchild's sake at least. "Dad! No! How could you? After all that I told you, how could you?" she was practically shouting in rage.

"Bella, you didn't tell me anything. All I heard was that he took away your life ." I said calmly. Hoping she would calm down.

"What else do you need to know, dad?" she asked .

"How... How did the Jacob I knew became the person you said?" I asked after mustering up the courage.

"Really dad ? Really? You don't believe your own daughter !"she said raising her voice

" Bella, you and I have known the kid ever since he was born. It would more than just a few words to make me change my mind of that kid. Especially after knowing that he is father of my grandchild."

"Dad! Drop it ! I don't even want to hear his name. We slept only once and it was a mistake. I could never love him not after what he has done to me."she was still shouting.

"Shut up!" I said.

"dad..?" her voice croaked.

"I said shut up! You may not know how much that boy loves you but I do. Eversince he was a kid, he had eyes only for you_. "Bella come look at this" "Bella did you see what I justdid?" "Bella, don't cry. I'm here"._ Bella this! Bella that! Every single time he opens his mouth, it's your name he chants. I bet he says your name more than he says hello. "I was in full speed mode.

"dad, I don't see your point, I mean.." she started .

"You don't see my point? You don't see my point? Bella! Did you forget with who spend almost half of your life with ? or Are you pretending that you don't have feelings for him . What exactly are you blinded... ?"I was cut.

"dad. Please.."

"Is it that Edward kid? Did he brainwash you or something? No wait.. Is he threatening you to stay with him? Cause you know I could.."

"DAD! Stop okay. Just stop it!" she shouted and continued.

" It's you who needs to check. I'm your daughter! It's me who you are supposed to believe and support. Not him okay! He has everyone back in La Push on his side. But me! I don't have anyone. Alice left. Edward left. everyone of them left. Jake isn't the person I thought he was. So that leaves just you and Renee doesn't even know anything about this." Pointing at belly.

"and if you too.. left me. Who am I suppose to turn to? Tell me dad. who" she asked.

"Bella, I'm not taking sides. Really I'm not. I just can't accept the fact that neither you or Jacob would be in mess. You don't.." he sighed but still continued "hmm..you don't understand, how your actions have effects on others. Especially the ones you love, I know. You didn't mean to hurt any of them but Bella. A lot of people became victims in this mess. Believe me, when I say this. Ties have been cut off. Hearts have been broken. Pain has grown among us." I could feel my body aching as I said that.

" Dad.. what do you mean? "how am I supposed to tell her everything that Billy had told me?

"Nothing. Just try to make up with Jacob. As soon as possible." I said trying to cover up.

"No dad. What is it? I know you are hiding something from me. " but she insists.

"it's nothing." I stressed.

"no. its not" she demanded.

"I said it is, Bella drop it."

"no dad! If it is because of me. I deserve to know. Just as how you deserved to know about my pregnancy. I made a mistake, I know you wont do the same as well"

"Well. The other day before the accident, I went to Billy's. We had a talk about both of you. "

"And what did Billy say? Does he know about me?"

" No. Jacob kept it a secret from him. And I believe he did it for the best" I heard her gasped

"why? What did Billy say?"

"Lets just say, he wasn't really thrilled about the news"

" He hated me, didn't he?" she asked. She was always a smart kid. Figuring things sooner than anyone else except.. for her personal life.

"he doesn't approve your relationship with Jacob."

" What about the baby? does he..?" she asked me.

how could I forget. "_I_ _would rather let it grow up without ever knowing it's father then to be a fatherless child" _

Idecided not to let her know about that instead I said "He wants you to stay away from him."

"good." I turned to look at her

"what?"I asked her, confused.

"good. Good riddance. I don't want see him either."

"Bella.. Bella. Why? Why do you make things even more complicated!"

"Don't you want to raise your baby with Jake?" she kept quiet, far too long. Then it clicked in my mind.

"You don't, do you? You don't have any intention on having a family with Jake do you?"

"Bella.. Bella!" I shouted at her, wanting to know

"No. no dad. When I actually agreed to continue on this pregnancy .. I wasn't planning on having Jacob involved at all. But he and the rest of them insisted that they are responsible for me and my baby. And so I agreed.."

"You are telling me that . All these months you just used him like a parasite. You tricked him into believing that you loved him. Bella? Is that really you? Is that how Renee and I raised you?"

"Dad, no. I did. At one point of my life did love him. I thought he could replace Edward when he left. And the past months, as much as I hate to admit it,I couldn't. I can't deny the fact that I had feelings for him. I somehow grew to love him. Maybe even more than I loved Edward.."

"But not anymore, not after he hurted me on purpose. He knew the Cullens meant my life. But still he chased them away."

" Is that why you left him?"

"No. there's more to it.. but.."

"tell me.. If you think I am your father ."

" Back then in La push, when I was with them. I felt as if I was being controlled. I didn't have enough freedom and nobody understood me."

"Running away isn't always the best solution. You know that very well, Bella "I reminded her of Renee's actionc.

"it was the only option I had" she stressed it. Stubborn as always.

"No Bella, at times you need to open your mind and heart to learn. To compromise with people for the sake of everyone. When you love someone so dearly, the rest doesn't matter. You will be willing sacrifice anything for them." I said reminiscing back about Renee. I let her out of our marriage vow not because I wanted to but because she desired it.

"I did, dad. I did it for Edward. He almost killed Edward. I couldn't live with someone who would harm my loved ones."

_He was lost,  
for her,  
he risked everything,  
for her  
He killed him,  
for her,  
she killed him,  
for herself._

" I swear Bella, you'll be the death of him. He is one of the strongest person I knew but god. You tore him to pieces" I shouted at her in anger that I couldn't manage to control. How could she be blinded ? What has she done. Oh Bella. Poor Bella.

"Dad!"

"Don't you call me that!" I tried to control the tone of my voice.

" I don't even know you, Bella. I can't believe that you could be so blinded by that Edward of yours. "

"Dad.." she started again.

"No. You listen to me. I'm going to say this once, and after that it's your choice. Do what ever you want, cause to be honest I'm tired. I'm tired of all the drama and basically just everything."

"You know, you don't have to get involved in this." She said wrapping her arms around her waist.

"I know. But I want to. Because I care for you. I'm your father, I've been through a lot with you, just because you want me out of your life, doesn't mean I have to let you go. You can't get rid off me that easily." I said slowly . And continued with the remaining strength I have.

"That's what Jake has been doing all these while. The more you push, the more he pulls. The more he loves you, the more you hurt him. The more you get what you want, the more he looses. Please Bella, I beg you. Don't bring him down, I don't know how much more could he take." And I continued

"you said you don't have anyone but youself. But for you, he would leave everyone. Just for you"

"He was there from the start. He was there when Edward wasn't. He was still there, even when you left. He came back for you. He always does. Just like the sun. No matter what happens, the sun will always shine again. It will always be there, to look after everyone. It never lets us down, it will everything with it's might to provide a happy life. It is warm and when you look at it no matter how many times you have seen it, it will always make us smile. And anywhere you are the sun never fails to makes us feel welcome and grateful to have it." I took a deep breath and continued

"But.. the moon on the other hand, I agree it is beautiful. No one could compete to it but don't you think...It is far from our reach? The moon never stays, it follows us whenever we go. but never stays, we couldn't actually count on the moon to appear in the sky everyday. And that is not say, we should blame the dark clouds that covers the moon during a certain time. Not at all, cause it is the moon's nature to disappear certain times of a month. We shouldn't blame it, we should be wise enough to know and accept nature as it is."

"we should know, what is good for us."I ended my speech.

"But why must I always be the one, who must give in. Why must it be me, who needs to sacrifice." I realized that there was more than just her relationship Jacob and Edward she was referring to.

" what?" it came out as a whisper.

"When Renee and you got divorced. I didn't ask for that. I wanted both of my parents. But I didn't get that. Neither did I get to stay with Renee until I graduated. NO, I had to sacrifice my relationship withy mom for her happiness. No dad, no. I want to be selfish. For once in my life, I want to have what I want. And I want Edward. Not Jacob. I want to be better, I want to have the feeling of being perfect for once. And I get that feeling when I'm with him. Not Jacob. I want to feel that I am more than just a clumsy girl or the girl who gets into trouble. When I'm with Edward. Everything is different, I feel perfect .But when I'm with Jacob. I am.." she was struggling to find the right words.

"Bella.." but I completed it for her

"dad." She was confused.

"When you are… with Jacob. You are Bella. Just plain clumsy, stubborn and not to mention a terrible liar. Is that bad, Bella? Being who you are? Being who everyone loves you? I want my daughter and I'm sure Jake wants his best friend. And when I said you are a terrible liar, I meant the part where you said you don't love Jacob anymore. You do, still do. You always do. Just like how he does. He doesn't stop loving you, neither can you. No matter how much you hate it. You feel yourself drawn to him. Don't you? Don't resist it Bella. Don't walk in my footsteps, don't do the same mistakes I did. You know very well it will lead."

"I'm not like you. Edward loves me! and that's what matters." She shouted.

"Jacob loves you too. If he didn't he wouldn't have planned to run away when you left with Alice. He wouldn't have saved up everyone penny and god knows how many part time job, he took to get you that bike. Although I see no point of him buying you that but that's not the point. Like I said he wouldn't have stayed with you at the hospital all the time. And.. by judging what Billy said..."

_"No, don't! You don't understand my pain.. cause u never had to force him to eat. u never saw him locked up in his room all day and having struggle to get out of bed? you didn't see the way he looked like a walking corpse for god's sake when she left! do you know, how helpless I was? he hardly ever spoke and when he did it was about that girl nothing else. he blamed himself for her departure and for all her problems. I couldn't help him even though he was right in front of me. I thought I was going to lose him Charlie! my son.. my only son. you don't have the slights idea how that feels. you don't have a clue how much he loves her. how much he is willing to sacrifice for her. how much she means to him. he puts her before himself ... "_

"how he struggled to even get out of bed, eat, or even breathe..I bet he went through hell during these few months. because of you. And don't you dare say that you are alone cause really, you are not. It's him that is alone. No one to understand his feelings, If you!" I said pointing at her, and continued " The girl of his dreams couldn't understand. The who the hell could? And so Bella, if you insist in being stubborn. Then. So. Be. It. I give up."

I was on my way on to the door, butI still managed to spare a few minutes while holding the door knob hoping she would change her I waited

...

...

...

But nothing, she just kept standing there by the window. Stubborn Bella. Stubborn Renne. Like mother,like daughter. It's happening again,all over. It's over.

"Bella.. I shouldn't be saying this. But.. I can't help myself."

"To be honest , you don't deserve him." With that I left the house.

A figure could be seen coming out in a hurry, from the Swan's residence.A hooded, teenage girl hoped in the rabbit and left in a rush.

Little did Bella Swan know, when she left her house crying. Her father was waiting actually in the cruise which was brilliantly camouflaged behind the bushes. He knew his daughter well, he knew she would go back to him. And his fatherly instinct was right.

He started the engine and drove to work happily, despite all the arguments that he had with his daughter. Because he knows that his daughter is going to La Push.


	34. Chapter 33 Truth be told

If you had read twilight saga wiki, errmm they did mention that whenever Jacob raised his voice against quill. Claire would get angry. So yeah the imprintee, could feel the connection and also about the imprintation they way i adapted it in my story. people have said that it's not really possible but i think it is. If Bella did open her heart for Jake, I'm very sure. Jake would have imprinted on Bella, because if you noticed based on Jared's imprintation. Jared imprinted on Kim (whom had a huge crush on him), he didn't pay any attention to her but he didn't imprint on her because Jared wasn't in love with anyone. His heart was free from any sort of feelings so, it clicked for them. And if Bella did for maybe even a second , she looked at Jake with possibilities then, he may have imprinted on need the so called "clarity moment" i think. Lol. So yeah, tough luck. You guys should check out the twilight saga wiki, i mean i learnt allot from that site. And btw to the people who said it didn't;t seem logic that Emmett and Jake get along, well if you read eclipse Jake did save Emmett from the newborns so yeah , i mean that could've been a new beginning to their friendship.

Bella pov

The vehicle jumped and swerved. "Damn it, get a grip," I cursed under my breath, dodging another bumper on the road.

It had been a tedious, painful drive. As hard as I had been praying for the contrary, it proved futile. The universe takes any and all opportunities to screw with me. I don't want to go to La Push, but I have to: I desperately need to know, but dread every second I come closer to the beach. I feel like I'm wishing for the rainbow without the rain.

The last trip I took was for Edward. I raced against time and his grief for a chance at love. Now, I do it again. But this time it's not for Edward and I face this alone. No sparkling Alice, no companion. Just Bella.

And it's not Edward I rush for, it's Jacob. I'm not going there to save him. I'm not going there on behalf of my father, nor do I go there with Jacob himself. I go for answers, and answers only. To unfold secrets that have been kept from me. And I can't avoid it, no matter how confused and frightened it makes me.

The feeling that I can't trust anyone, that I'm alone... I feel hollow, gripping the steering wheel with white knuckles and a parched throat.

Edward lied to me, and the fact burns. How is that even possible? He had no reason, no right. Jacob had no motivation, either. My head hurt and my heart ached, betrayed at every angle.

The surroundings of the car gradually began to morph. The trees blurred and shimmered as I wrestled with my thoughts. The forests of La Push were unnerving: there were too many memories in these trees. My heavy foot tensed on the gas, heart shriveling and stomach almost like it had been forced into a blender.

The Blacks' house came more quickly than I thought. I killed the engine when I pulled up against the curb, listening to the sound and vibrations die, leaving me to face my emotions without interference. I'm alone.

And I don't want to go in the dark, damp house and face Jacob. I steady my shaking hand between my knees and bite my lip. I peek at Billy's window across the dashboard, watching, waiting, feeling like a helpless rabbit stuck down a dark hole. The still scene remains and when nothing proves to be in motion, I feel safe. I don't plan to have a conversation like before: just Bella and Jake, no one else.

I only remember it in images. Jacob stands by his window, behind him four others pause motionlessly. Embry, Paul, Jared...Sam. And this feeling of hate inside me that I almost can't control. I hate him for taking away my Jacob. Not the Jacob that tried to kill Edward—no, not him. That sun had vanished, forever gone.

The sky is dark, the sun isn't going to shine again, and so my only hope is the moon that waits behind gray clouds.

I thread my fingers through my hair, flattening my palms against my scalp while rocking back and forth incessantly. It's only after a stretch of long minutes so I gather my courage and get out of the truck slowly, holding carefully onto my stomach. I'm briefly reminded of the burden inside me and shudder at the idea of hospitals, never planning on returning until the baby arrives.

I take a few steps on earth I have not tread upon in months, last being when I came to get my Jake back. Everything somehow circled back to him: as much as I tried for it not to be, this was about Jake.

I grunt at the thought, perhaps more loudly than I should, but don't care because my head with swimming at the thought that maybe Charlie was right.

His words haunt me as I move towards the door. Don't you see my point? Bella! Have you completely forgotten who spent half their lives with you?! Or are you pretending that you don't have feelings for him... How can you be this blind?"

I shut my eyes at the thought. No, Bella, you can't beat yourself up on this. Something shifts and I start, skin prickling as a voice slips through the quiet.

"Bella? Is that you?" I sigh in relief, glad that the voice didn't belong Billy nor Sam nor the Jacob I came for.

I inhale, calming down as I recognize and embrace the husky, soft voice of Jared. He appears from behind the house and raises both eyebrow in surprise.

"Bella," he says, surprised.

"Hey." I force a smile and wave my hand. So much for a private conversation.

"Hey..." he answers, still stunned. A long, awkward silence follows until he takes a hesitant step. "I don't mean to be rude but why the hell are you here?"

Well, straight to the point. I open my mouth to speak, but before I can manage a few words Seth comes jogging around the corner, placing himself between Jared and I.

"You're here!" he chirps, all smiles as if he has been expecting me.

"You knew she was coming?" Jared shoots a sharp glance at his younger counterpart.

"No, I mean, yes. But you see—no. What I mean is..." he stumbles on his words, eyes wide and honest.

"Chill, neither of us bite," Jared mollifies and holds Seth's shoulder. "Deep breaths and just tell us. Use English."

"I knew Bella would eventually show, just didn't know when," he admits, almost guiltily.

"Thought she'd come sooner." He smiles shyly, hand clasping his shoulder. I twist my lips. Perhaps he meant as soon as I had been discharged.

"You know, you actually came right on time," Seth perks near immediately. "We were just about to leave." He practically grabs my hand and drags me along, rounding the house with Jared close behind.

Jared managed to force Seth to a stop by the edge of the woods, growling, wrenching my wrist from his hand. "It's not like you can just drag the pregnant lady around," he gripes.

Seth's eyes widen. "Right, sorry." He gives me an apologetic look.

"It's okay, you're just...You have a strong grip," I managed, admiring my arm. He hadn't even noticed my tugs on of his fingers.

"Alright, no woods. Let's take it inside," Jared grouches, adding, "Looks like rain." He points to the sky to justify himself.

A thought hits me and I move away. "Wow, thanks, but I'd rather not. I should be going..." I'm cut off when I notice a dark figure moving between the trees, freezing when he sees me. Light hits his face and I pale.

"What's she doing here," Paul growls, glowering at Seth.

Jared came to the rescue. "She was about to leave, just coming to check up on Seth."

Seth nods in support. "Yup."

Paul doesn't buy it. "Since when do you care about Seth?" he accuses, trudging in our direction.

"I can send her back if it pleases his royal highness," Jared mocks for a moment.

Paul snarls and pushes Jared away by the chest. "Stay out of it. She should know she's not welcome here anymore."

Jared's eyes soften. "Paul..."

"Shut it!" Paul snaps, and Jared goes silent. He turns back to me. "What do you want?"

I shouldn't have been, but I was frightened. I knew that if I had punched him once I was capable to doing it again, but my heart didn't seem to be on the same page as our history, racing faster the more Paul stared.

Seth made a motion to block Paul, standing between us.

"She came to see Jacob," he challenges boldly.

"Pfft," Paul scoffs. "For what? To see if he still has a pulse?" He snorts and towers over Seth in an instant.

"Paul, stop. Leave her be. She came here alone and in peace," Seth defends.

"Thank you Captain Obvious," Paul replies, rolling his eyes. "Good to know she came without a sack of leeches to guard her." His eyes darken.

"Move." He makes to shove the immobile Seth, but he resists.

"No."

Paul twitches. "What."

"I said no, Paul," he speaks again. "I'm not moving. She needs to talk to Jacob. Leave her alone. Now." The once small, innocent boy suddenly becomes as fierce as his elder instantly.

"Move or I'll move you," Paul threatens.

I can't hold my tongue any longer. "Please, Paul, is Jacob even here?"

Paul tenses. "I suggest you turn around and run back to your tics."

This strikes a rebellious chord. "Don't tell me what to do," I retort.

"Don't forget princess that you're in our territory," Paul smiles. "Everything we say goes. Now beat it."

"Paul, Jacob and I are none of your business. Stop interfering and just tell me where he is!"

"It's not your relationship anymore," Paul growls. "You can't call it that after involving everyone in it. Because of your pathetic need for a man, we've had to become like this. Because of you, Harry died, those trackers in the woods died. Because of you, Emily is scared. Because of you, Leah isn't the same. Quil got stuck with a toddler. A kid lost his freedom. Jake changed. Haven't we suffered enough because of you? The only reason I've kept quiet this long if because of Jake. But not anymore. Not after you used him and then broke his heart."

"You can't blame me for that, I didn't have anything to do with—,"

"Hell, I can blame you for everything!" he screams.

"You are the cause of every bad thing that has happened here. When you came everything went downhill. Our relationship with the tics was fine until you came and made a mess of everything we had worked for, involving other leeches in our business. The red-head came back because of you. Who's fault is everything? Who made us into monsters? You play a huge role in everything. Heck, you destroyed the whole tribe! You make us fight each other, doubt each other. The day you stepped foot here what the last day of peace in our lives."

"I didn't ask for any of that!" I cry. "Do you think I want to get into trouble?" Seth grips my arm tighter. He didn't need anyone to phase.

"Perhaps you do."

"What?!" I gasp, exasperated.

"What do you expect us to think? Those leeches left, but you went after them and brought them back! How can you be this selfish?! After all Jacob did for you, you still went running back for your stupid, ugly, ignorant—,"

"You have no right to talk about Edward that way!" I interrupt.

"Paul..." Seth tries but Paul quickly shuts him down.

"Don't take her side, Seth, don't sympathize with the murderer of your father..."

Seth flinches, eyes watering. "Paul, she's family..."

"The day you left," Paul growls, "the day you chose the leech over Jake, that was the last straw. No more." He spits at my feet.

" what? Ok,let me get one thing straight. I left" stressing the last two words and continued "because you guys were controlling me. Ever since i was staying with Jake, you guys controlled my every move. Sam forced me to stay around here, i didn't even get to visit Alice whenever I like, she's my best friend! And what more, He could've killed Edward. You guys chased them away because those stupid treaty rules."

" that treaty is the only reason, you and the rest of the residents here are still alive should be grateful." Paul said advancing a few steps towards me.

" And about Jake, if he didn't step in the other day. You would've lost child and might as well yourself."

"No! Don't you blindly accuse Edward. He would nev.."

" Cut the crap woman! Your unborn child paralyzed because of him and still you are defending the lover boy's of yours? What kind of mother are you? Jake has been putting in effort to make your relationship work and you're the one here accusing him guilty. "

baby paralyzed. My hand automatically wound itself to my womb. My chest began to tighten, my brain began to over took me, that gave Paul an advantage and kept on criticizing me.

" if you didn't have any intention to be with him you shouldn't have lead Jake on and then let him rot. He did all he could but you..pathetic.." he said in disgust.

" what did he exactly do?" my voice croaked and fist tightened.

"Bella.. " Seth reached out to grab me but I stepped away.

"No. Seth. i want to know. I WANT TO KNOW EXACTLY WHAT JAKE HAS DONE THAT I HADN'T! What has he done that is much greater than my lose." My voice rang through out the green surrounding.

" I lost the love of life, my dad, my friends. The whole town isn't looking at me the same way anymore, I was the one in hospital not him! I endured the pain not him! I have to take care both him and Edward! I ha.."

"shut up! You brought all those problems, yourself. Don't you point fingers at others, because of your stubbornness! If you had stayed put like we told you to. None of that would've have happened. You don't listen that's your problem!"

" And god knows that you don't plan things either. You just let yourself be swept away. Like the time, Billy advised you not to hang around with the cold ones, now what look how many people died because of the red hair tracking you. You could have learned your lesson but no. you wanted more, you followed the pixie and added yourself more oh here's the best one, " Jake is just my best friend..." Paul was pushed before he could finish.

" Stop it" Seth growled.

" why should i? She hurt our brother. Can't you see how much he suffers? Doesn't it hurt to watch him walk around like a corpse? Tell me, that this isn't her fault! Tell me Seth!" Paul wall yelling at Seth and his arms began to quiver.

"she didn't know any better,Paul." Seth said shaking his head in disagreement.

" You're telling me, that she didn't know any better after knowing Jake run away when she took off with the pixie? Or the time when she found she was pregnant with Jake's kid and thought of getting rid off it? Really Seth?"

" It's not that I wanted to get rid off , you wont understand. I don't love Jacob like I love Edward." My voice was soft, i couldn't hold back my tears. Maybe he is right, maybe i am a bad mother, but that doesn't change my love towards Edward.

" Maybe you're right, I don't understand. But I do know that Jake loves you more than you know. He left us all just because you broke his heart. He even let you decide the fate of his child. Heck he even discarded Billy! His own dad because Billy disapprove you. What did you in return? Run off again with just like you always even then, after all you said that day. He was always there watching over both of you."Paul said

"what.." i whispered, looking up at him finally.

"But you didn't know that, huh?" he raised an eyebrow.

" Every night since the day, you left he stayed outside your house and guarded like a dog, just so he could be there if you were in pain with the baby. And to think even a dog would have been treated better than how you treated Jake." Paul sighed before continuing.

" He followed you to protect both you and the baby from the red hair. He even slept off in the hospital everyday watching over you and kept you didn't sleep ,eat, bath, nothing! He was nowhere to be found if he wasn't there with was about you and the baby. he left us for you! He rather live a life being alone than being with the family that loved him. But you! Running after danger again and again. And the worst part of all is. You knew. You knew all along but still .." he stretched the last word which allowed me to butt in.

" i can't help it." I admitted. " i love Edward. We belong together. Jake and I, we were just suppose to be..." in this vurnable state, i was. I couldn't help but to let myself be honest.

" God woman! Would you stop that?! You belong to Jake. He imp..." before Paul could finish. He was thrown against the tree.

" Bella" Seth shouted as he grabbed me and brought me to the side.

I froze and held my breath without even realising. Everything was a blank, but I heard growling sounds and howling as well. I stared at the events that are happening in front of me, i couldn't comprehend them at first but when reality sank in. I realized, there was allot of big,fury wolves surrounding the tree that Paul was hit. I tried my hardest to stand up, to watch with my own eyes what is happening. Two wolves circling each other and growling back in the middle of circle of wolves.

The dark silver fur, was snarling back at the bigger russet brown... russet BROWN! JACOB! A wave of realization hit me as I understood that Jake must have pushed Paul to the tree to just... he just save me?

Before i was caught up into my trail of thoughts, a loud deep growled erupted from the circle of wolves. Their angry snarls echoed like thunder, that may have fooled me because of the dark sky covering above us. Both Jake and Paul were circling each other, snarling, growling until.. Jacob launched the first attack onto Paul's neck. It didn't stop there, no it wouldn't. Because Paul was a fighter too. But as the fight got intense, the rest of pack got closer to watch the conflict, completely blocking my view.

NO! Jacob! I started walking towards the scene but Seth grabbed me back. "No Bella" he stressed and his grip tighten as well.

" Seth let me go. I need to see Jacob" i gritted my teeth, as tears started flowing from my eyes. I didn't know why or when i started crying. But I am and I didn't stop.I know it is futile for me to break free from his grip but still.. I tried. I had to.

Through all the chaos, a loud growl erupted from the circle of the werewolves, it was louder than anything I have heard before. My heart raced faster by the second, never faster than i have ever felt because i swear at that second i could feel my own heart beat clearly. It was rigging in my ear, and my body felt warmer all of sudden.

Something is not right, something terrible had happened. My heart continued pounding against my chest, as if it wants to break free from my chest but before I could anything about the pain, a loud wailing sound caught my attention, the one you would normally hear if a dog gets hurts. At the same time, Seth let go off my ... more like he lost his grip. It couldn't be.

"no..no.." I mouthed, as I fell on to knees, one hand was found it's way to wound around my baby mound and the other barely covering my mouth from my surprise. Pause. As if the author of the moment hit the button, everything stopped. Seth, the pack,Paul and..Jake. It was quiet, too quiet. No, Paul wouldn't have..Jake is strong, he wouldn't have lost.

Jake.. I called after him in my heart

Jake... my heart stopped, I lost him. I truly lost him. Didn't I? I tried to open my eyes to prove myself, I was wrong. This couldn't be it, but the tears blurred my vision. They started falling down , I didn't force myself to stop crying. No, I let myself free. For the first time, I let go of everything.

"Jake" I whispered as I outstretch my hand, as if I could catch him. "I'm sorry" I mouthed, as I balled my fist out of anger.

Anger against Paul or was it myself. A part of me, my conscience is telling me that it's my fault. If it weren't for my actions, this wouldn't have happened. But another part of me, which I never really knew existed in me, is asking me to get revenge for Jacob. It took control over me, anger flared through my eyes. Paul.

But, as soon as I heard low, weak growl coming from where the fight happened. My heart rejoiced, Jake.. could it be.

"JAKE!" I shouted, as i got up to my feet, so fast I thought I would have fell but Seth caught me in time. But I was wrong, he didn't let go off me after he caught me, he hold me still.

" Let go off me" I shouted as I fought him hard, but he resisted. He grabbed me from behind as his arms snaked in front of my baby bump and pulling me back.

"No Bella. It's dangerous. Stay here, Jake's fine" he tried to reassure me but I needed to see for myself. No words could satisfy me from my need to hold Jake in my arms and see him smiling back at me.

" no! i need to see him" I shouted at Seth while hands were working on getting away from Seth's clutches.

"No Bella! Listen to me" he tried. I tried. He tried to comfort me. I tried to escape. "jake!" I wailed, calling out to him.

I realized the pack knew what i wanted, in an instant I saw the grey with dark spots and chocolate brown fur moved out of my way and I saw the russet wolf beneath the paws of the dark silver wolf. "Jake.." I whispered as I hold back my tears.

I could have swore that I saw the russet wolf had tears in it's eyes aswell. I managed to see that little but meaningful detailed because of it's face angle was facing me, the silver wolf's paw was on Jake's face,squishing his beautiful face . I wasn't hurt anymore but I still held anger against Paul. It was like a time bomb, even the slightest movement from Paul could trigger me.

I wasn't sure if it was because of Charlie's speech or Paul's out burst or even if because I was carrying Jake's baby. I wasn't sure which was the source of me seeing Jake in a new light but some how I didn't care. I'm just glad to see him being alive. "Jake" the words escape my mouth before forming a genuine smile on my face, as the last drop of tears glisten down my cheeks.

The wolf was still staring at me until the other one, pressed his paws hard on Jake's face and growled at him. As if Paul was scolding Jake.

For a second there, I thought Jake was in pain but before I could even blink, he flipped Paul and got on his paws and maintained that position, as if he was waiting, for Paul to make a move. I realised that he wasn't the only one anticipating Paul's next move. I realized that everyone was engrossed in this conflict and not to mention Seth as well, and so I took that chance to escape.

I don't how, but i managed to slip in between the brown and black fur wolf, and would have arrive at Jake's side but i stopped. When i heard him, sending a low growling sound. I stopped at my tracks.

"Bella! I told you its dangerous" Seth shouted, running after me and caught my arm again but I wasn't going to let him capture me again.

"no Seth, let me go. I want to be with Jacob" I spat at him. But before he could even protest, the dark silver wolf took his time making his way towards us, everyone froze... except for Jacob. The large russet fur wolf, move past me .

"Jake, don't.." it came out like a whisper but he heard. The wolf, well my wolf turned his head to the side to look at me, and growled. In way, I was comfort by that. Our eyes were locked into each until Paul hissed, made Jake whip back his head.

Back, onto concentrating Paul who was in front of him. They stayed still together for quite some time, it may have look as if nothing was going on except two wolves staring back at each other. But only some, may know that two men were conversing with each other or so i think.

And soon, the silver wolf shook his head, as if in disappointment and left. he sprinted into the woods followed by a brown color wolf. The rest remained, but I didn't. I ran towards Jake, and threw my arms around his neck. Even though my arms couldn't reach around his neck, i still clinged onto his wolf form. " oh.. Jake" i sniffed, and tried to bury my face in his fur so that he couldn't see I'm crying.

But my Jake, he always managed to chase away my worries. He nudged his nose against my hair, when I didn't respond he changed his strategy and tickled my neck. I tried to resist but I gave up quickly. I turned my face to look at him but i was still laying my head against his soft, thick fur..cozy... and so much more that if i wanted to list down it would take a life i don't words could even describe the feeling that i had when i got capture in those eyes.

Even though, my Jake is in his wolf form, his eyes never changed. It's the same one i have been staring at for past 18 years of my life.i never grew tired of it and never will.

Do you know the feeling you get when you get yourself a hot chocolate during rainy time? or when you sit in a corner in the library where the sun shines in through a small window and you can see the dust particles swirling around as you read your favorite book. Or even when your favorite songs plays in the background and everything just seems to set in the way, you wanted it and you let go of everything just to be in that you know it's a rare moment and when it comes you have to grab it and try to keep it as long as you could. I found it and i hold on to it.

And I smiled, feeling at ease. But the feeling didn't stay long, because Jake flinched and shook his head vigorously as if something is bothering. I tried to figure out the cause but it was futile. Before I could even communicate with him, he took off. He ran, leaving me. but I wasn't prepared to be left again. "jake! Wait" I ran after him and the rest of the pack after me.

I know I would be a fool if I thought I could reach him, but still my legs kept moving. They don't see the logic that my brain does. They kept running, and by being Bella. I am not allowed to just be normal, I just had to something. And that moment my clumsiness kicked in and I tripped. Yes, a pregnant woman tripped. I shut my eyes tight and awaited for the fall, the hard floor of the green moss forest welcomed me with open arms as I felt a gush of wind hit my face.

I fell, my knees landed on the soil but my stomach didn't as well as my my entire upper body. Something caught me, i realized. I opened my eyes to see what had happened but all i saw was grey hair like thing right in front my eyeballs. I shrieked and back away a little and got the full picture. A grey wolf, caught me by crouching down it's body in front of me. it looked angry and let of a low but deep growl as if it's scolding me. I was about to thank it but it left sooner than i thought, jumping into the other side of the forest and disappearing.

I was still confused on what just happened, but I instantly turned my head when i felt Jake's presence but realized a big dark black wolf was standing in front of Jake in a crouched position and growling loudly at him. I couldn't identify who the raven fur was , it's almost the same size as Jake but still Jake was bigger. I was shocked, when Jacob snarled viciously, I could see him biting down his canine teeth, he is angry. No, not again Jacob."please don't fight." i prayed silently, I could almost feel my tears swelling up again.

I'm not sure if the dark fur wolf noticed me or not but it sure did stomped his paws with so much force that everyone within that radius could have felt the effect, when a tear trickle down my cheeks. Jacob's snarling and anger ceased soon, and he shook his head and nodded once. And as if, the other wolf got his message, he took off into the woods joining his brothers leaving just me and my russet boy.

As soon as we were alone, I opened my mouth and called him "jake.." to my surprise he didn't respond, he didn't turn back to face me either. "jake.." this time I tried to reach him as I walked nearer to him but then a sandy colored wolf jumped in between us. I instantly recognized who the wolf was. Seth! not because of the his wolf build which is smaller and rangier than of his brothers. It because he gave me a huge grin, the one your puppy gives you when it welcomes you back home. He brought along with him a pair of shorts and lay it on the ground in front of Jake and left.

I kept my eyes on Seth as he went deeper into forest but he did manage to wink at me before doing so. I chuckled at his action and brought my attention back to...whoa!

Jacob Black nude as the day he was born is standing a few meters in front me, as he was putting on his shorts.I could feel blood rush to my cheeks at the sight of him being..you know. I quickly looked away, even though . we did...once , it still felt awkward.

"are you just going to stand?" Jacob startled me. my throat constricted,i tried to hide in vain the lump, that had began to grow there.

"errm.. nope." I said shaking my head, as I mentally finding for a topic to start with him.

"who was it? The one who saved me from the fall?" that's the best i could come up with.

" Leah"

"ahh.. no wonder.."i trailed off. While kicking a small pebble on the ground, while looking at him under my lashes.

"look if there's nothing else. Leave, i got work to do" he said, already turning his back to me, both of his hands in his pockets.

"wait! I came to see you" i shouted.

"well, it's still working. You could leave now."he said while patting his chest,the area where his heart is while biting down his lower lip.

I could feel the cold disdain, from . Not again. It's like deja vu, Jake and me in the woods. Him being cold towards still I want to.. I need to try.

"Isn't it weird? We are in this position that we once were?" I said, hoping he would soften or even stop walking away from me, if he remembered. It worked, he stopped on his tracks but did turn to face me.

I heard him smirk and, "you put me in this position, twice. I didn't ask for it."

"but the last time i came. I wanted to save you" I replied him urgently, trying to defend my past action.

" I wasn't the one who needed to be saved. Leave, before it rains" he said as he walked into the forest.

It hurts, as he walks away from me. I felt as if the string that is holding us together was being stretched and not the way you stretch a rubber band more like the way you blow up a bubble gum. To much space, it popes.

"Wait Jake!" I yelled after him as i ran into the woods, trying to get to him before he phases.I tried and I tried but he seems to be getting further. I sped up to him, using all the remaining strength I had in my running skills and barely but still managed to grabbed a hold of his shoulder.

" Jake..." I gasped for air. He remained silent for a while and then said

"Let go off me" his voice was empty, but he did stiffen at the touch of my hand

"jake?" I whispered not believing that this is happening ..again.

"I said let go off me Bella" he raised his voice a little

"Jake, why are you acting like this?" i asked him

"why did you come? I thought you said you're never coming back?"

"i said a lot of things" I couldn't justify my actions.

"State your purpose" there was no emotion intact in his voice.

"Are you really going to treat me like this?" i asked, as i chewed my inner lips

"Isn't this how you wanted me to treat you?" he retorted.

"No, it isn't" i said, and i realise, my plan just falter but into dust under the impact of my stupidity.

"Well I'm sorry Bella. I think I got the wrong message when you told me not to treat you like that anymore. You said I didn't deserve it " he continued "Maybe you should've explain to me what did you mean by that and how do you want me to treat you from now on, cause seriously I'm tired and confused"

"Jake please" I said moving forward to him. I took a step closer to him. He back away from me two steps.

"No!"he shouted and then continued in a low tone "Stop. Just stop right there.. Don't try it again Bella. I'm not strong enough to go through it for the third time"

"Just go back to Charlie" he said as an afterthought.

" No I wont!"I shouted

"Suite yourself. I don't care" he said keeping the poker face on.

"Liar." I whisper at first but then i burst.

"Liar!" i shouted as loud as i can. And as if cue when i broke down into tears, the dark sky's, rain fell down too.

"Liar! You stupid ignorant liar!" i shouted as if nobody's business but he kept walking away from. "Liar.." it came out as a whisper and i continued "Why? why didn't you tell me?!" i raised my voice a little hoping it would catch his attention.

And iIwas right, it did catch his attention because he stopped. He stopped walking and asked. " What are you talking about?"

"Don't pretend that you don't know. You should have told me sooner." I took my chance and gave it my all.

"Bella.." he called out, soften but it was my turn to be cold.

" Why did you let Edward lie to me?"

"what?"

"The bike? You didn't tell Charlie the real story did you?" I brought that one up, since it was the main reason I came to meet him.

" I ... I couldn't. And I wouldn't go back on my words. I promised, remember" he said ever so softly that it could have killed me, if it was not for that silver string holding me on.

"Why? why are you being so nice to me, I don't deserve it." It's hard for me to hate him if keeps on doing like this.

"You won't understand. Not now" he said bringing back his cold side, as he straighten his back.

"Don't tell me that. Don't' you dare push me away like how he does. Like how everyone does, I thought, I could trust you and you would trust me back. " my voice faded at the end.

" Trust me? When did you ever do that? When I said I loved you, I meant it Bella. And yet you left with Alice to get him. Was that how you showed your trust to me? or when You went behind my back to meet him and almost kill our baby? Is that how much you trust me? " he said hitting his chest hard.

"yYu are not all good either. you didn't tell me, that our..." I paused, I could feel my breath become heavy, like I couldn't get enough air, tears tugged in my eyes as i continued. " You didn't tell me our child is paralyzed for life either. How many more secrets are you keeping from me?" I choked.

"Bella" he turned to face me now, his look soften and I can sense his guilt. " why? why would keep that from me? you started to act like Edward more and more.."

" I didn't keep anything from you. It's you didn't give me the chance to say it. Don't you remember?" " he cut me through before I could finish talking.

"Well you could have told me if you wanted to. You could have came to my house" I retorted.

"I wasn't allowed to. Don't come to forks or call. That was the order, remember?" He counter attacked.

"But you came, you were there at the hospital. You were always there weren't you? You could have told me if you wanted."

" but why should I?" he caught me off guard with that question.

"What?"

" Yes Bella, why should I be the one to tell you about our child's condition? Aren't you suppose to know about that? Didn't Sue tell you, in your last appointment?" I blinked for a mere second, couldn't really believe this is happening

"Of course, she would've told if only...you went. If you cared that is." He said, almost alike to Paul

"Don't you dare accuse me" i was outraged by their accusation.

"Why shouldn't I? Give me a bloody good reason why shouldn't I?" he stressed every word, as he was clenching his teeth

"Because you are not the one who is carrying the baby! you are not the one who is in a lot of problems. And you are not the one who lost everything!" i said flapping my hand in the air.

"You! You! You! Is that all you ever think? What about me? forget that, I accept that you may never love me back but what about our baby? what did it do to deserve any of these? You knew, what it would do to the baby if you were in a close distance with him but yet you went along with your heart. I'm not going to ask why or what. I'm sick and tired of this tirade, just go back home and ... try to keep our baby alive, please. " he begged but he didn't stop there.

" please Bella,"

That did it, it really hurt. Way to poke the knife and twist it a second there he made believe that maybe it really was my fault. His words pushed me back to memory lane, forcing me to remember back every detail. It was like karma was, punishing me, emotionally. Maybe i did deserve all, i was the one who came into picture, i brought it all to myself. Because i was dumb enough to play with others feelings, foolish enough to think that my actions wouldn't affect others and selfish for wanting both of them

"I'm sorry," I said but he kept walking away in the rain.

" I said I'm sorry" I shouted and continued " I take full responsibility. For everything. You can't imagine how sorry I am- and believe me, i know how inadequate a stupid apology is. If it wasn't for me, you wouldn't be in this mess." I had to be cause it is my fault. After all he has no choice, I've taken that from him. The same goes to his life and his family. I taken all that from him, just for myself. I'm sorry Jake.

Droplets of transparent liquid fell on top me and wetting everywhere around me. Coldness would soon creep back to my skin and bones, no. that wouldn't do, the baby need to be warm. So I quickly fasten my jacket and pull the hoodie on.

" Sorry is hardly good enough Bella. You have made a grave mistake. Perhaps you have forgotten the boy who was your best friend and over the years that we have been together because you made it clear the other day, that i wasn't needed anymore in your life. And by the way , did you knock your head some where on the way here? Cause you must be out of your mind, the Bella I know would never in a millions years come back here.."

"Jake" i interrupted him

" You must have a lot more important things going on in your life."

"Jake." I called him again

" No Bella. For once you listen to me. All these while I was listening to you but for once I want a change."I kept quiet because I figured, I owed him at least that much after everything he'd been through. And karma found it's way to me and swallowed me up whole.

" I don't think I could keep all these things in me anymore and it is clearly hurts the pack more than it does to me. So you listen. If you think saying sorry will fix this and if you think I will sympathize with your heart break with the lost of your dear beloved leech. Then you are wrong. So wrong.. Me, your best friend, your so called sun who you tossed on the garbage. Me, who was hurt the most in this love triangle that you created. Bella, you flirted with me just so you could get information about the Cullens. I thought you loved me, I thought finally Bella sees me as a guy who is worth for her. Even now, no matter the distance that has grown between us, I still waste my life loving you. Ignoring my dad! The one who needs to be cared by me or my brothers who suffer the pain I feel and kept within me every time I phase.I have loved you and will always love you Bella but for now, I need to reconcile with my family."

His words stung me, as I felt tears escape. I cursed inwardly, for feeling weak. This is my fault, I deserve every ounce of his hate. But I had no power to stop the slow trickle that started down my cheek it would hard to distinguish the rain from my tears.

"With the people that love me and that I have hurt. Good bye Bella." He whispered those words and left .

And I fell on to my knees, and slowly due to time without me realising it. I curled up in a fetal position, just like how my child is in my womb.

"must be warm."

"Keep the baby safe."

I chanted both those phrases as if they were mantras or spells that may be able to reverse or even safe me. My mind was blank and i could hardly feel legs. Something or someone in the back of my mind was telling me " Bella, get up".

It sounded like Jake, but... that's impossible. He wouldn't.. he hates me. And the worst part of all is, i made him that way. I created that cruel,cold, soul less monster he is now. I could have sworn i heard Paul mocking me " are you happy now? He is just like one of them" accompanied with the evil laughter.

The rain started to pour down even harder,it was as if the droplets were needles poking me. i deserve that. Some how the pain, woke me up. I don't think I'd really fallen asleep or was drifted away some where, i was just lost in an unthinking stupor,holding with all my remaining strength to stay tried to get my mind distracted or even a small coma would do. I don't want to face Charlie, Jake, Edward or anyone else. I made a big mistake and I'm embrassed that i didn't realized that sooner. Then maybe i could have fixed it...

The rain bothered me a little. It was getting freezing. I wrapped my baby bump even tighter. "Don't worry, mommy's here. I'll protect you" I whispered to my unborn child, that I have deeply effected. My baby.. my poor baby. what have i done? I squeezed my eyes tightly not sure whether not wanting to get rain into my eyes or to stop the tears that are forming.

It was then, i heard the calling again. It was farther away this time, sometimes it sounded as if the voice doubled but i was it wasn't because one voice was more feminine than the other. The voices were getting louder, i could hear them clearly calling out for me.

I was trying to gather my strength and courage to turn my head when i heard a sound, startling close.I remained still and waited until i felt a hand on my back shaking me.

"Bella?" and when I didn't reply, the voice sounded even more concern and desperate.

"Bella!" this time the force , rolled me over so now I was on my back and holding up a hand to cover my eyes.

"ooh..Bella. thank god. you are alive" Emily said desperately as she hugged. I realized she was crying because I felt her cheek warmer and swollen and behind her was Seth looking worried.

" Nice day to rain eh?" i said, to break the dull atmosphere, " erghh you idiot." Emily grumbled as she put my hand over her shoulders and tried to lift me up but she wasn't able to do that until Seth lend a hand .

"where are we going?" i asked

"home"


	35. must read

hey guys, i think there has been a huge misunderstanding, chapter 34 is actually the new chapter because the previous chapter 34 was the preview and when i got done with the chapter i replaced the preview with the actually chapter.


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